ChinaUncensored

October Monthly Message!

Added 2017-10-07 18:35:54 +0000 UTC

Happy October, my 50-Cent Army!

It’s going to be a spooky month! No, not because of Halloween. But because hundreds of corpse-like zombies will be stumbling into the Great Hall of the People on October 18 for the 19th National People’s Congress, where they will feast on brains! That’s just what they do, it doesn’t have anything to do with Halloween. This will be the culmination of the past five years Chinese leader Xi Jinping has spent consuming souls of corrupt officials. If Xi has gathered enough power and guanxi—a Chinese word for “relationships”, but what I like to call mana—he will be able to avoid naming a successor to replace him in 2022. And then we could be seeing what I call “Presitator” Xi Jinping. Not quite a president; not quite a dictator!

Furthermore, Xi will also try to prevent the head of his anti-corruption campaign, Wang Qishan, from retiring due to age restrictions. And as you all know, since you’re my 50-cent army, the anti-corruption campaign is really about purging all the gombas in the Jiang Zemin toady faction.

In other news, I’m very proud to announce an upcoming pilot for a new show! America Uncensored. (It’s still a working title. What do you think?) It’s something I’ve wanted to do for a long time. Just so you know, I worked on the pilot outside of my time working on China Uncensored and I didn’t use any of China Uncensored’s resources, including Patreon funding, to make it. Since you are all so amazing, I’ll be giving a sneak preview to my 50-cent army first, before anyone else gets to see it! Stay tuned, I’ll be sending out the link in a day or two.

And finally, I hope you all had a happy Moon Festival and are recovering from too much mooncake. I know I am.

Much love,

—Chris