218 - The Mountain Part 2: Naem

Neqal’s lab was a mess, which was likely a reflection of his mental state.

He had essences and wasted chaos strewn about, the outerdarkness whispering and moaning.

Naem picked his feet through the floors, watching the snarling creatures that Neqal had chained up in the corners of his room of horrors.

There were fewer than he remembered. Neqal must have been busy in the last few days.

Naem had also been exceedingly busy with travel and had only just made it here to find his brother gone from his domain. He was probably in the dungeon heart, wreaking havoc. But Naem wasn’t too worried. Thanks to the soul oath they’d drawn up, the havoc could not directly harm Lexie.

Not that he was worried about Lexie, of course.

He couldn’t worry. He did not have paternal affection. 

It was just that he needed her alive, that was all. Not only to fulfil his soul oath to Aiden, but also so that she could fulfil a favor for him.

That Lexie occupied an inordinate percentage of his thoughts over the past few human months was as a result of this need, and nothing else, even though the few times she’d brushed with death left him feeling…

Tense. 

Yet that did not mean that he cared for her in the human way, of course. It was simply that so much of his future now hinged on her existence.

He had made a lot of bets on her. He could not afford to lose.

This was the first time he'd stepped out of his programming in such a major way.

Only his association with Lexie made that possible, and to think that association had been so unplanned. He'd never thought an unintended error would lead him here.

He hoped the error could do more. He hoped the error would save him.

He could not have told her any of this, though.

If he’d told her his plan back when she was a human, she would have never accepted it, and she would have probably killed herself trying to avoid that outcome.

He could not tell her that he was an Eldritch because she would not have understood it either. 

But now, as the thing that she was, he could still not tell her. Because the oath he’d sworn with Neqal, their wager, forbade it. 

He stood and waited for Neqal, poking at the domain periodically to remind Neqal that he was here. 

His brother arrived in a flash of rage and violence, immediately showering spiked balls of darkness over Naem. 

Naem deflected the spikes with ease. 

“You tricked me!” Neqal declared, sounding as outraged as Naem had ever heard his brother. 

“I did not lie to you.” 

“You led me to believe she was weaker than she was.”

“Yes."

“You did not tell the truth about the soul card.”

“I did. I informed you that I did not entirely understand what it was, but I believed that she could learn to utilize it to steal the powers of lesser Eldritch.”

“But not that she could practically control them. Not that she could wrest my own disciples from my grasp.”

“Ah.” Naem nodded. “You see, I was not sure about that part.” The nature of Lexie's soul card pathways was unlike anything he’d ever seen before. The only thing that could give him a hint of what the soul card was for was the intent behind its creation. 

The soul card had been created from Lexie’s need for survival and her sympathy for the Eldritch she'd soul touched. It was also a way to corral the beast, take away its pain, and calm it.

She had drawn from the chaos mother and combined it, not just with Eldritch magic, but with a rare type of human magic that had never before been seen.

A small drop of chaos that Naem had ignored the entire time he'd known her, believing that it was just a piece of her magic, had slowly but surely become a storm that could now topple a regime.

In any case, Naem did not believe that Lexie could control Eldritch with that card, but he did know that she could amass power and influence with it. He'd told Neqal as much, but he'd also chosen words and intonations to downplay it.  

“I do not understand why you are angry,” Naem said. He frequently did not understand when Neqal showed such emotions because his own emotions were muted, from a combination of time, effort, and external factors.

“Oh, do you not?” Neqal gave him a challenging glare. “She has wrested Pvilycht from my control.”

“So? He is simply one of your many inventions.”

“He was one of my better ones. Now, because of our oath, I cannot even kill him.”

“Yes. That.” The oath was one of the stipulations of their bet, to make it fair. It was that Neqal could not directly kill Lexie or her companions for the duration of Lexie’s test in this dungeon. This did not entirely protect Lexie, as Neqal could still scheme in such a way that it indirectly affected her.

But Naem knew that he could protect Lexie from the worst of the schemes.

Another stipulation of the bet gave Naem access to the dungeon heart but only in terms of observing and influencing the tests. Like what the humans would call a control room.

He and Neqal jointly influenced the tests, using Neqal's connection to Yasycht, with Neqal increasing the difficulty, and Naem making the test more personal.

If Lexie lost, died, or got trapped by the dungeon, Naem would forfeit aspects of his soul and his powers to his brother.

If she won, Neqal would let Lexie live and not harm anyone in her association.

It had been too good of a deal for Naem's brother to pass up. He was always too greedy and prideful, frequently underestimating his opponents. That was his downfall.

The test with the mountain would be the final one, and a lot was riding on it. Neqal had also planned something for Lexie's downfall this entire time, likely underhandedly raising an army against her without being directly involved.

Neqal was temperamental and unpredictable, but their oath had used vital soul components. He could not break it without dire consequences.

Yet, Naem knew he was continuously planning something, waiting for something in the dungeon.

Despite Naem telling him that Lexie's advancement would benefit them both, Neqal did not entirely believe it yet.

He'd seen her power, yet rather than support it, he was envious. He wanted to steal it.

Naem did not hold it against him. It was his nature. Neqal, a being of mischief, pride, envy, and genius, wanted what Lexie had. He was one of the oldest and most powerful Eldritch Lords, yet his legitimacy was always questioned and challenged.

Lexie's card would make him King.

"You are far too short-sighted," Naem told Neqal. “You should not be attacking her."

“Easy for you to say. You’re not the one she’s stealing from.”

“Hmm.” She had essentially taken a V'Sala from him, but Naem did not mind.

“Do you think she’ll do it?” Neqal asked, sneering, “Set you free? Even if she gains the power to do so, she might simply side with the Fae, or kill you."

“I do not know,” Naem said. Despite his efforts to arrange and manipulate things in the way that would be most favorable to him, there was still so much that was unpredictable about Lexie herself and about her powers. She could decide to kill him. She could decide to help him. 

Yet, he’d taken the chance anyway, because the alternative was another eternity of this nonsense. 

The Fae Oath that bound him was strong, and it made him feel so intensely wrong that he’d spent centuries dulling himself so he did not have to feel it again.

An eternity of being reincarnated over and over again, memories altered, edited in ways to make his magic stronger, make him more compliant. Making him more and more wrong.

When they sensed their bonds slipping, when he gained enough awareness and power to slip their bonds, they would repeat the cycle to get a more docile version of him. They would take things away, alter things, and make him different constantly.

Yet he always felt the lack, and as time went on, he began to know exactly what was being done to him.

But his change, at least, was constant. 

That was nothing compared to what they’d done to Neqal, using Naem as the control.

Neqal was an incarnation of Naem, combined with more outrageous components, for a more aggressive experiment. He was more unpredictable but harder to control.

He had the potential for more power, but any discoveries they found with his power were added to the next cycle of Naem, bonding them together.

“I will not lose this dungeon to her," Neqal grumbled. "Note it."

“You can always get it back,” Naem said. “Our deal will be ending shortly, regardless.” Their deal ended when Lexie left the dungeon, or became incorporated into it. They had reached that point. This was the last test.

Naem listened to the silence, felt the shift, and said, “I must go now. I believe I am being summoned.”

The scenery changed, and the next thing he knew, he was in Nothingness, facing Lexie.

Looking at Lexie was like looking into a mirror of himself. Her emotions were written all over her face as she stood there like a ship adrift.

He had a memory of being exactly like her when he'd last been awoken as a young Eldritch.

He'd faced the Fae, sensed their disappointment.

Though he was more powerful, they had failed once more to create a Chaos Source through him.

That was what they wanted. A new Chaos Mother entirely under their control.

They never expected such a thing to come from a puny human staring back at him, though.

“Hello,” he said. “My soul spawn.”

***

Lexie was struck with emotion when she saw Naem.

It was not his human face that she saw, but his Eldritch face. Or one of them at least. The one she'd met when she signed the soul contract, with four-arms, a mask, horned teeth and the dark, inky skin.

She swallowed. The Mountain was nowhere to be found, though Lexie could see her presence.

“Hello, my spawn.”

Lexie’s chest tightened. Her hands formed fists. She wanted to hit him. 

“Do not call me that,” she told him. “I am not your Soul spawn anymore.”

Amusement radiated from him. “Then why do you appear so much like my soul spawn?”

“I do not know what you’re talking about.”

“I see,” he said, and the sentence was so familiar it ached. She was instantly swarmed by all the emotions she’d felt. The hunger to kill him. The anger that he’d left her in that dungeon. The need to hear a reason why he could discard her that easily. Somehow, there was still warmth, fondness wrapped up in nostalgia.

And hurt. So much hurt.

She opened her mouth, then remembered the rules that the Mountain had given her. She could only ask Naem questions pre-approved pertaining to her heart's desire, or the connection would abruptly end.

She took a deep breath, calming herself, and asked. “Why did you send me here?”

“Why do you think I left you here?”

“They said you made a bet on me.”

“Yes. I bet you would succeed. Neqal bet you would fail.”

“Succeed how?”

“That would depend on you.”

Lexie bit her lip. That didn’t answer her question. “I don’t know what success means. I’m not sure what you brought me here for.”

"I brought you here because it was the fastest and easiest way to grow your Eldritch and to test your mettle in a controlled environment. To also put you through personalized tests.”

“So you’re the reason my tests were so different?”

He inclined his head. “It was a joint effort.”

“Are you the reason I ran into Max, too?”

“No. That was a coincidence. I did not even know where Max was, and Belshyct is not one to make deals. That was all you. But coming to this mountain is thanks to me."

“What is all this for?”

“To free me.”

“Free you?”

“Yes.

“How?”

“When you leave this place, I shall tell you. “

“More secrets, then. Do you not get tired of them?”

“Frankly? No.”

Lexie frowned and then said. “I have two options. Backward and forward. I can either kill the human part of me and become fully Eldritch. Or I can suppress enough of the Eldritch part of me and just pass as an Eldritch-possessed human. But neither of those options suits me. I do not want to give up my powers or my humanity.”

“Are those the options?”

“What?”

“You said that you had to move backward or forward. But both of those seem like backward options to me.”

Lexie opened her mouth to deny it, but then slowly closed it again.

That was right...in a way. 

She had already lived a life where she was human and partially Eldritch. It was a life where she’d spent most of her time riddled with guilt about her Eldritch side, ashamed of it, constantly trying to hide it. She was no longer that person. She didn’t want to be that person anymore, as it was exhausting always hating a part of yourself.

But then she had also been nearly completely Eldritch at the beginning of this journey. She’d had no humanity and had been driven solely by her Eldritch urge. She enjoyed the power she'd had, the lack of fear, the way she was so in tune with her magic and her cards.

But being solely Eldritch had not only been uncomfortable, but it had also been incredibly boring and agitating. Not to mention, she hated how stupid being Eldritch had made her. Perhaps now that she was more mature as an Eldritch, she wouldn't be as stupid, but she still liked the way her human brain thought.

If she didn't have the human, she might have been satisfied as an Eldritch.

And if she didn't have the Eldritch, she might have been satisfied as a human.

But she had both.

She was both.

Rather than being the worst of both worlds, why did she not try to be the best?

There were things she liked about being human and things she liked about being Eldritch.

There were also things she hated about being human and things she hated about being Eldritch.

Overall, though, it wasn't bad being both. Both were hers and both were...excellent.

The acceptance had come slowly, but when it did, it anchored her.

 The human had learned to accept the Eldritch, and the Eldritch had accepted the human.

Neither was in charge, because she was both, and there was no need for her to control any side of her.

As Naem had told her once, control was overrated. All she needed was to be both in it's fullness, starting with getting her humanness back, and then advancing to grow her Eldritch.

But then what did that leave her? She still had to make the choice. 

“The Mountain said those were my choices,” she told Naem. 

“Did The Mountain tell you, or did you tell the Mountain?" he said. "I often find that humans and some others are too obsessed with labels. It helps give them the illusion of control. You do not know what to do. You are confused about your identity, and the Mountain gave you the best way to get rid of that confusion. But what if the confusion is the point?”

“The Mountain said I couldn’t exist as I am, unless I never leave the dungeon."

“No. It might have suggested that it wasn’t advisable for you to exist as you are. But the Mountain does not know you, Lexie. It does not know what you will become when you accept the fullness of your humanity and your Eldritch, when you let them truly combine. Even I do not know what you will become then.”

“I will be neither Eldritch nor human.”

“No. But you will finally be entirely Lexie.’

Lexie took a breath. “I cannot exist outside of this dungeon like that. I cannot go to the Other and be an Eldritch Lord, nor can I go back to Earth."

He smiled. "You are Lexie. Your entire existence is defying expectation. You simply have to employ a little creativity. After all, that has always been your strength. That, and not your mana capacity, has always been what made you special."

Lexie pursed her lips.

"The Mountain does not truly know you, Lexie Sparrowfoot. It is giving options based on what it knows.”

“And you know me?"

“I have been bonded with you before, have I not?"

She didn't like the reminder.

"One more thing,” Lexie said. “How is...Aiden?”

Naem frowned at the question, but the connection was disrupted before he could continue.

There was suddenly a bad feeling in her stomach.