106 - Unstable

Aiden didn’t stop trying to talk to Lexie. 

He kept sending her texts every night, and it was always sweet stuff that made her feel so much worse about what she was doing. That first night, he sent, “Good night. I love you and I know you need your space, but I’m here when you’re ready to talk. And it’s best we do it sooner rather than later. There are things I need to explain to you. “

Yeah more like things you need to gaslight me on, Lexie thought uncharitably as she banished the system screen. She was still pissed and a part of her knew she was being unfair. After all, she’d been lying to Aiden too. But she had real, soul-ending reasons for keeping her secret and she’d still told him the truth in the end. Versus him who kept lying all the way. 

He was trying to protect you, an unwelcome voice of reason spoke in her mind but Lexie ignored it. She resolved not to think about her fight with Aiden anymore, at least not until after her fight. She needed her full attention on preparing for the match because there was no way she was letting herself lose to the likes of Diana. Not after that bullshit the other girl pulled that day. 

She thought once more about Conrad’s request for her to sit out the match. She’d considered it briefly in the gym before Diana showed up. Apart from her emotional turmoil, or perhaps because of it, Lexie felt a little like there was something wrong with her. She felt…unstable. She probably shouldn't be fighting while unstable.

But then she would remember the smug look on Diana’s face and she knew there was no way she was letting that girl have the last laugh. 

Really? The voice of reason said again. Making decisions based on emotionality rather than rationality. This isn’t like you, Lexie.

Well, it is now. 

Instead of listening to her thoughts, she occupied her time watching videos of Diana's fights and practicing card combinations that she would use on her.

Their fight would be held on Friday at an arena on the outskirts of Arcadia. She and Tate would be the only ones from Conrad's group fighting on that day. Tate was fighting a guy who was really not happy about being put up against a mundane. He was very public about his disdain, repeating in online forums that Tate must be another spoiled rich kid like Kane the mundane whose parents were secretly funding his mechs. He'd even crafted an elaborate story about how Tate and Kane were from the same secret agency that wanted wealthy mundanes to take over the circuit. His reasoning for it was that they each had four-letter names that ended with 'e', which meant their names had to be code words.

Lexie's team all had a good laugh about his delusional ranting when Boris read it out to them. All of them except Lexie who couldn't manage more than a smile. 

Two days after their fight, Aiden texted Lexie to let her know that he’d dropped off food for her at Emma’s house and that he would appreciate it if she would come home to meet him at some point that day. Lexie texted him a thank you but told him she wasn't ready to go home or talk yet. He should give her till the end of the week.

“What are you doing later today?” she asked Tate when they were done at the dojo. 

“Why?” he asked.

“Because my day is wide open.” She was avoiding going back to Hovelton. Despite her best efforts, her fight with Aiden remained on her mind, and now that she was mostly done with the defense deck, she didn't have anything to distract her, except reading medical textbooks. The issue with that was her mind constantly drifted back to her argument with Aiden and it was shading all her thoughts. She felt like she couldn't think straight. She felt so much overwhelming guilt sometimes and other times, she felt overwhelming anger. Underneath all of it was a sadness she couldn’t shake. 

Tate stared at Lexie for so long that she took her request back. “Never mind.”

“If you're having issues with your dad…” Tate sounded hesitant like he didn't quite know how to approach the topic. His fingers tugged at the hem of his shirt in discomfort. “You should probably talk to him and makeup.”

Lexie blinked. “What?”

He shrugged. “I don’t know. Maybe I'm talking out of my ass, but he seems like he cares about you and he would never intentionally hurt you. Also seems like a decent guy. So whatever is going on, the two of you should work it out.”

A flood of anger filled Lexie. “What would you know about it?”

Tate flinched and Lexie was instantly filled with regret.  

“Tate, I’m sorry I didn’t mean it like that,” she said. 

“No, it’s fine. You’re right. I don’t know anything about it. My dad, back on the other Earth, was a total asshole so…” He shrugged. 

“I’m sorry,” Lexie repeated feeling like a total shitstain on humanity. “I shouldn’t have said that, it’s just, I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I keep lashing out for no reason. But I shouldn't have...you didn't deserve that."

Tate shrugged but his expression remained carefully blank. "No biggie."

Lexie exhaled. "I actually meant to ask, how did you know I fought with my dad?”

“It’s all over your face,” he said. “I may not know much about you, but I do know your dad is probably the only one who can put you in a bad mood for almost a week straight.”

“Yeah.” Lexie exhaled. “Anyway, I should probably go home.”

“Yeah,” he said. “You probably should.”

Lexie took the train home, but as she approached Emma's house her feet slowed. A sixth sense warned her that she was about to walk into an ambush.

She activated the Sir Toadword and sent him hopping over to investigate. 

The little frog materialized and then bounced through the grass, hopping onto Emma's window's ledge. Lexie immediately got two alerts, one to access Toadword’s sight, and another to access his hearing. 

When she accepted both, her vision doubled and her hearing echoed. She saw Emma and Aiden seated in Emma’s kitchen. Aiden had a cup of tea in front of him and so did Emma.

Aiden looked nervous constantly folding and unfolding his hands. 

“What time is she going to be back?” he asked.

“Soon. She usually returns around this time.”

Shoot. They were going to ambush me after I just asked for space too!

Lexie felt unreasonably angry at the betrayal that they’d intended to dole her. How could they? Sure she was planning on talking to Aiden soon, but she didn’t want to do so close to her match day. She didn’t want to mess up her focus again. 

Lexie had thought she would be safe at Emma's place, but it seemed not. Angry, she turned around and walked away storming all the way over to her Uncle Max’s. 

When she threw open the door both Max and Luke were standing in the living room across each other. Their heads pivoted and their expressions slackened with shock. Max was shirtless and had a slab of meat in his mouth. Luke was in his trademark mayor’s robes and asked, "Lexie? What are you doing here?"

“If my dad asks, I’m not here." She walked right in and went up the stairs. She knew where their guestroom was, the third door on the left. She paused and wondered how she knew, then figured her Uncle had told her at one point while they were having shooting lessons. 

She didn't stop moving until she was in the room. It looked sparse, with just a bed, one pillow, and a desk.

Lexie locked the door and retired to bed still fuming about what Emma and Aiden had pulled. A few seconds later she heard sounds at the door, or what were clearly meant to be whispers but bled from the crack underneath. Lexie sent Sir Toadword to investigate (he could pass through walls) and saw Luke and Max arguing. 

"What's going on with her? Is this a teenage thing?" Max asked.

Luke shrugged. “Why doesn't she want Aiden to know where she is? Do you think they had a fight?"

“How am I supposed to know? More importantly, what do we do now?”

“We should call Aiden.”

“No. If we do that she’s going to leave and the next time she runs away from home, she’s not going to come here.”

“But he has to be worried sick. That's not right.”

“He’s a big man, he can take it. We'll just have her tell him she's at a friend's house."

“Fine."

“Good, it's settled. Now, you talk to her."

“Why me?”

“What the heck do I know about talking to kids?”

“What do I know either?”

“You’re a mayor. It’s your job to talk to people and be all diplomatic and now you don’t want it do it?”

Luke sighed. “Why is it always my responsibility to clean the messes?”

“This isn’t my mess.”

“Somehow it feels like it is. What if they fought because Aiden found out about the gun?”

"Oh you just cannot let that one go, can you?"

"You gave a ten-year-old a gun!"

"She's eleven."

Lexie sighed. She could tell that this argument was going somewhere else entirely so she got out of bed and headed to the door. When she pulled it open, they turned to her in unison and were very much deer in headlights once more. 

“You can tell Aiden I’m here,” she said. “But tell him that if he comes over I’ll go somewhere else. And I’ll keep doing that if he keeps pushing me. I just want to be here until I’m not mad anymore, and then we can talk. okay?”

They shared another look and nodded. “Sure.”

Lexie closed the door again and locked it. The whisper argument continued but this time it was over who would break the news to Aiden.

Nevertheless, the good thing about being at Max and Luke’s place is that neither of them bothered Lexie. Luke had to head out to work and Max stayed in his bunker most of the evening. The only time he came up was to tell her that he was ordering Pizza and to ask what toppings she wanted on it. 

Lexie told him mushroom and that was it. A few minutes later, he gave her an entire box all to herself. Lexie didn't have much of an appetite and only finished a single slice. Uncle Max left her alone for the rest of the night and she left early the next morning to the dojo for more private training with Conrad.

Regardless, she decided not to go back to Max's that day. She didn't trust Aiden not to show up there, or have them stage an intervention for her. Luke would probably approve of that and Max wouldn’t protest because he didn’t want to be involved. So she went over to Terry and Glinda’s instead. 

Glinda was the one who answered the door.  She peered down at Lexie and asked, “What’s going on?”

Lexie got straight to the point. “Can I stay here for a  night?”

“What’s wrong with your place? Is it being fumigated?’

“No.”

“Huh. Odd, I thought I saw a swarm of insects outside your window once."

Lexie frowned. That would have to be Naem. So he was watching her. Was her father right? Had Naem done something to her while she hadn’t been paying attention? 

Maybe if you’d stuck around Aiden you’d actually hear what he had to say.

Lexie hadn’t felt like it and she still didn’t feel like it. She didn’t feel strong enough, stable enough to talk to Aiden without exploding all over him again and she didn’t want to do that. No matter their differences, he didn’t deserve to be hurt like that. 

The question now was did he believe her when she’d said that she wasn’t his daughter? He didn’t seem like it because he was still desperate to assure her of his affection. That might be why the ISTS had not yet descended on her with all its wrath, because her revelation hadn't changed anything.

So what happened now? Did she double down, or did she move on and stick with her lie so the ISTS didn’t kill her?

It was odd though, because Tate had seemed to suggest that even just insinuating stuff might bring the ISTS hammer down on her. 

But now that nothing had happened, maybe she should go full throttle with the disclosure. She should explain to Aiden as well as she could what had happened.

But after the match. The day after tomorrow, she would return to Aiden's home and face the music.

She glanced up to find that Glinda was still watching her expectantly as though waiting for an answer. Lexie didn’t even hear the question.  

“I’m sorry, what did you say?”

She shook her head. “Never mind. Just come in, you're letting all the hot air out.”

“Okay, thank you.”

Later that evening, she got a text from both Max and Luke. 

Luke: Lexie? Where are you? We’re all worried. 

Max: Where the heck are you, kid? Also, why did you turn off the tracker?

Lexie: Because I didn't want Dad to find me. I’m fine. I’m safe.

Max: Not his tracker. Why did you turn off my tracker?

Lexie: Because I didn't want you to find me either. Relax, I'm at Terry and Glinda’s. I’ll be home tomorrow. 

***

It was a nippy afternoon when Lexie met Conrad and Tate at the bus station. They were the only ones with fights today and so Conrad was here to accompany them. Lexie sat at the back with Tate beside her. He didn’t seem interested in conversation, and neither was she so they just sat while Conrad gave intermittent pep talks.

Lexie tried to rest during the trip, but she only felt more tense the closer they got.

This stadium was bigger than the last and seemed more filled up. Two ushers led them to the back rooms where they would get ready. This room had a better assortment of snacks, and some gym equipment in case you wanted to get warmed up.

Lexie went over to the mats and began stretching.

“You nervous?” Tate asked as he came to stretch beside her.  “Don’t be. I’m pretty sure you're going to beat her.”

Lexie did not respond verbally, but she shrugged weakly. 

After Tate left to go to the bathroom, Conrad came up to her. 

“What’s wrong?” he asked. “I’m trying to respect your wishes but I’m starting to get worried about you.”

“Nothing,” she said. Conrad gave her a look so she admitted, “I had a fight with my dad.”

His expression turned sympathetic. “About being in the AFC?”

“No. About something else. Personal stuff.”

He nodded and said carefully. “There’s still time to pull you out if you want.”

“No, I’m fine.”

He shook his head, meeting her gaze. “Lexie, trust me. It’s not worth it to fight with a messed-up mind. Take it from me. You should pull out.”

“No.” She’d already trained so much to be here, and so many things had been planned around this fight. Dewie was coming to watch her. She couldn’t just back out now. She gave Conrad what she hoped was a convincing smile. “I’m fine. Seriously.”

Conrad maintained eye contact and sighed. “Alright. If you say so.”

Tate returned and stared at the both of them, his gaze lingering on Conrad.  Conrad simply shook his head and backed up. Lexie wondered for a second if Tate had spoken to Conrad about her, if that was why Conrad had offered her the chance to remove herself from the contest. They were both worried about her. Or maybe Tate simply didn’t want the competition. She didn’t know which. 

They watched the first set of matches, but Lexie didn't retain anything. Her mind was a fog and she kept zoning out even as Conrad pointed out some of the cool moves other competitors executed, and how he would have countered them. Lexie nodded distractedly and tried to pretend like she was paying attention but it was hard.

Then, one of the ushers knocked on the door. 

“Hello,” she said and her eyes fell on Lexie. “Lexie, you have a visitor.” 

“Who?”

“He says his name is Dewie and he’s your best friend. Those are his words exactly.”

Lexie bolted out of her seat and ran out. Finally, a familiar face. 

She ran down the hallway when spotted Dewie outside by security. She didn’t see anyone else who might have passed or called out to her at that time. She simply had tunnel vision when it came to him.

His grin was like a beacon leading her out of the darkness, as she threw her arms around his neck. 

“I missed you so much,” she whispered. She missed him and everything he represented, a different time, a simpler one where everything hadn’t become this messy and broken and ruined.

“I missed you too, Lexie.” Dewie patted her back awkwardly but she didn’t take offense because that was how Dewie normally reacted hugs. As Lexie pulled back, Dewie gestured beside him. "This is my friend Jace." 

That was when Lexie finally noticed the tall gangly boy with freckles all over his nose and an affable smile, standing next to Dewie.

“Heya.” He waved.

“Hey.” Lexie knew she sounded less than enthused so she added, “Nice to meet you.”

“It’s great to meet you too.” He jabbed his thumb at Dewie. “This one here wouldn’t shut up about you so I had to tag along.”

“He watches the AFC,” Dewie said. "So I thought he could explain stuff to me during the fight so I wasn't too confused."

"That’s nice.” Lexie cleared her throat. She wasn't sure exactly why she was irritated by the other boy’s presence. Maybe she was possessive over Dewie. Maybe because Jace reminded her how much things had changed in their friendship. Or maybe because she thought Dewie would become alone so she could hang out with him after the match, but now she had to do it with this other kid she didn’t know and she was not in the mood for meeting strangers. 

Nevertheless, she couldn’t be rude. So she gave him a smile that felt tight around the edges and said, “It's great you're friends with Dewie. You guys are roommates right?"

"Oh yeah," Jace said and they chatted for a bit, mostly with Jace and Dewie telling her all about school. 

Then Tate came to find her.

“Lexie.” His eyes passed over the other two, to which he gave an acknowledging nod. “You’re up.”