Flexible Thinking for a Modern Life: Chapter 6

Summary: A commission series for Alfalfa. Iris Fleurs, the stretchy daughter of a slime mother and a human father, tries to live her best life and feel comfortable in her own skin. Teenage rebellion ensues.

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CHAPTER 6

"The judges have reached a decision."

A declaration of finality mercifully cut the tension through the air. Up to that point, the crowd had been quiet. Mystified, even. 

Iris stirred underneath the watchful eyes of the entire crowd. She tried to position herself behind Sarah, to use her as cover, but it didn't work particularly well; Sarah was several inches shorter than her.

"DO IT AGAIN!" A small child shouted from the stands before being shushed by her mother. Miguel winced, leaning over to Iris.

"Ignore him." Miguel muttered. Iris nodded, rubbing her arm as she glanced across. A well-dressed official wandered to the finish line, holding a megaphone.

"It's an... interesting situation we have, to be sure." The man cleared his throat. "However, according to our official rule book - the one I hold in my hands..."

The portly man raised a thick tome in one hand, waving it back and forth.

"...It is stipulated that the racers be placed in the order by which they cross the line. The torso, specifically, must cross the line. And seeing as... well, it was the torso, well..."

Iris' eyes lit up. That means...

"...Team Fleurs is recognized as the victor. Congratulations." He coughed, clearing his throat. The announcement lacked bombast - it was simply a statement of fact.

The crowd broke into a murmur once more. Only one person's voice broke the relative silence.

"YESSSS! WE DID IT!" Iris bounced up and down, patting her teammates on the back. She gestured an obscenity to Sherry. "SUCK IT, SHERRY!"

"Iris Margaret Fleurs!"

It was then that Iris remembered herself. The commanding utterance of her full name sent a chill down her spine. She almost never heard her full name, middle name included, announced at once. Only when she had done something really bad.

So despite her better judgment, she froze up. In the corner of her eye, her mother was stomping up from behind, placing her hands on her shoulders. She had a deceptively powerful grip.

"We're going home." Celes muttered, hurrying her along. The goopy tendrils of her hair twisted and writhed underneath her sunhat.

"What!? B-but we still have-"

"Move." She growled once more, shoving Iris along towards the parking lot.

"Iris!" Sarah and Miguel exclaimed in unison, hurrying behind to keep pace. Iris turned her head to see them.

"...I-I'll see you guys later! ...Maybe!" Iris called back. She had a feeling she was about to get grounded for life.

As a mother and her daughter made their way out of the parking lot, they attracted the attention of the entire crowd... and then a few other unwelcome guest as well.

"Oi! Trouble! You saw that, right??" Toil exclaimed. 

"Hell yeah I saw that! Crazy girl stretched like twenty feet at once!" Trouble confirmed. "And, like, lengthwise too! Not growing twenty little footsies or anything, but-"

"The mistress'll wanna hear this! This is wayyyyy juicier than any junk food out here!" Toil nodded, rubbing his palms together.

"...But is it as juicy as those orange slices?" Trouble rubbed his chin, his tail flicking back and forth.

"...Dunno. But the Mistress Kamika looove gossip. And we got ourselves a good source this time..."

The two gargoyles snickered fiendishly, before making themselves scarce. They slinked under and behind the bleachers, and made their way deeper into town...

---

The Fleurs were parked at the far corner of the lot. It was a small, unassuming black model - a little cramped, but it usually didn't see a ton of use. Usually if they had to transport something to and from town. 

Iris and Celes didn't say a word as they marched to their car. Just when they reached the side doors...

"I'm here!!"

Sier's voice called out from behind, waving his hand manically. He huffed, jogging over to the two of them. In his left hand, a medal was clutched.

"Here you go sweety, I got this for you..." Sier muttered, slinging it over her head. Iris stared, dumbstruck.

"...Hoorayyy. A medal ceremony in the parking lot." Iris sighed to herself, lowering her head.

"Get in the car, we're going." Celes muttered to the both of them, getting into the driver's seat herself. 

Sier glanced to Iris, giving her an unsure look, before hobbling over to the passenger seat. Iris shook her head, taking a seat in the back.

"...C-Celes, dear, don't pull out too quicKLYYY!"

The wailing of the engine and the screech of the tires signalled the start of the trip home. Iris folded her arms, slumping back in her seat.

"What exactly is this about, Mom? Dad? I won fair and square, why are we-"

"Iris..." Sier cautioned, turning around to face her. "Let's have this talk when we get home. We don't need to agitate your mother any more than she already-"

"I'M NOT AGITATED!" Celes snapped, turning the wheel sharply to make a hard right. Iris and Sier could only hold on for dear life as they swerved through traffic. 

"M-Mom, what the hell!? Are you a psychopath!? You're gonna break something!" Iris shouted, a little rattled by the jerky movements of the car. 

"Celes? Do you want me to take the wheel?" Sier asked a little shakily.

"I use this car way more than you do! I drive fine!" Celes growled, swerving around another vehicle. She must've been breaking more than her fair share of traffic laws...

Sier stared at her, and sighed, easing back into his seat. "Iris, sit tight for now... a-and hold on to something."

"Sheesh." Iris rolled her eyes, reaching for a bar underneath the door handle, bracing for the trip home. She folded her arms in her lap, leaning back in her chair. 

...Left to her own devices, she got to thinking. If her mom kept driving like a maniac... well, Iris would probably survive easily. And her mom. Her father, however...

She glanced forward, a look of mild concern crossing her face. Even from behind, she could tell her father was anxious.

Iris closed her eyes, focusing the energy in her arms. She held them forward - they slowly began to lengthen, reaching out towards the seat in front of her.

"Ah! Iris?"

Sier flinched, feeling two warm arms reach towards him from behind. They bonelessly hugged around his torso, slipping around the seat. Iris' arms wrapped around Sier's seat, securing him in a snug fit.

"Don't worry about it." Iris muttered casually. "It's like another seatbelt, in case mom decides to go off-roading or something."

"Iris! We've talked about this!" Celes blurted, glancing over.

"I can't give my dad a hug once in a while?" Iris muttered. "Besides, you're gonna crash into something. I wanna make sure dad doesn't break his neck."

Iris' arms made a few more loops, making sure her dad was secure. 

"...W-well, uh, thanks, dear..." Her father blushed slightly. For some reason, he felt a little vulnerable. The sudden awareness of his own mortality in comparison to his immediate family as rather off putting.

---

Thankfully, the car trip home was without incident. No devastating crashes, no horrifying collisions. It was actually a little unsettling how quiet it ended up being. The air was tense...

Before long, the three of them were seated around a table. Iris twisted the medal she had won in her hands. Celes tented her fingers, seemingly deep in thought. 

"...What's this about?" Iris asked, letting her medal go. "I went out there and won the race, fair and square. I wanna be out celebrating, with my friends."

"We're happy that you won, but..." Sier started. "It... might not've even been the right way to win."

"...'The right way'??" Iris tilted her head. "The judge came out and said that I won. Is that not enough? They even gave me a medal!" Iris held up her medal. 

She paused, grimacing. "Oh, wait, no, they didn't give me a medal! Dad did! Because you guys wouldn't let me stay for the ceremony!"

"Don't take that tone, Iris." Celes admonished. "You know why we had to leave early."

"NO! I DON'T!" Iris exclaimed, raising her arms in exasperation. "I won! Fair and square! And I wanna celebrate with my friends! What's the big deal!?"

"We understand, but... your mother's worried." Sier sighed, taking a seat to get on eye level with Iris. "About how you... used your abilities. In public."

"Yeah! I did! And I'd do it again! What's the big deal??" Iris blinked. "Sarah and Miguel know about it. They're cool with it. And, and how long has the city known about mom? It's insane!"

"...We're going to take you out of school." Celes said. It was blunt, straightforward, and she hardly moved a muscle. 

"WHAT!?" This time it was both Iris and Sier's turn to react. They both faced Celes, there eyes wide with surprise. 

"Everyone saw you, Iris." Celes explained. "We don't want anyone treating you differently. Remember back in kindergarten? All of the other kids would grab and poke at you? We had to pull you out and homeschool you..."

"So what?? I have friends now! They don't care about that stuff! The only one who cares is you!" Iris shouted, slamming her hands on the table. 

"Iris! Everyone saw what you're capable of! We can't go back now." Celes glanced over to Sier. "Sier and I will take shifts homeschooling. Then nobody else will find out-"

"I DON'T CARE WHAT OTHER PEOPLE THINK!" Iris shouted. "Why do you think you can control every aspect of my life!? The people I hang out with, the places I go, the things I do, my own body! I can do so much, but I can't even be myself in my own home!"

"It's so you can learn to control yourself!" Celes retorted. "So you can fit in! So you can live a normal and happy life!"

"I was having the best day of my life until you showed up!" Iris snapped back. 

In her rage, parts of her body elongated passively, as if she was trying to appear taller than her mother. Her neck gained a few inches as her body grew several feet in a matter of seconds.

Celes folded her arms, looking up from her seat. She rose to her feet, her hair tendrils standing on end. All this left Sier feeling a little too small for his britches at the table. 

"Iris, you don't understand what you're doing..." Celes muttered, her voice cautious.

"You treat me like a child!" Iris blurted.

"You are a child!" Celes fired back.

"I could do anything I want! I could go out there and help the people who need it!" Iris shook her arms in fury. "What do you do!? You just sit at a desk and make clothes for rich assholes!"

"IRIS!" Celes shouted, her hair tendrils shooting out in all directions. "That's enough of that! You're not doing anything of the sort! Go to your room, you're grounded!"

"WHAT DID I EVEN DO!?" Iris spat back. "I did nothing wrong! Are you ashamed of me!? Do I need to be locked up!?"

"UPSTAIRS! NOW!" Celes barked one last time. She was intent on shutting down this conversation. 

Iris clicked her tongue, returning to her normal proportions, and stomped out of the dining room. 

"I HATE YOU!" Iris shouted from across the house, before slamming the door behind her. The final declaration of rebellion struck a chord with Celes, as she slumped back into her seat. 

For a moment, silence fell upon the Fleurs household once more. The parents sat together, taking in what just happened. Sier had a grim look on his face.

"...Celes." Sier was the first to talk. "We... maybe we shouldn't take Iris out of school." He glanced over to Celes. "She's happy there, and she has friends... and her grades are good."

"..." Celes looked defeated, about to fall over on top of herself. She teetered back and forth...

...And slumped over the tabletop, resting her head in her arms.

"Sier... I don't know what to do." She sobbed quietly in her arms.

"Celes! Celes, come here..." Sier embraced her from the side, patting her back. Her body jiggled with every haggard sob.

"We can't keep doing this, Sier..." Celes leaned into Sier's chest. "All we do is fight, I... am I a bad parent?"

"No! No, it... she's feeling stifled, is all." Sier rubbed her head. "...Maybe she'd feel better if we... relaxed the house rules a bit. On her stretching."

"..." Celes remained silent. She was thinking about it.

"We have to trust her." Sier cautioned. "She's a good girl. With a good head on her shoulders. She's just... passionate."

"...I know." Celes nodded, sniffing silently.

The two parents held each other for a long time. It was all they could do to calm down after Iris' latest outburst.

After a while, Celes raised her head, a dreary expression on her face.

"...Maybe I've been too... too restrictive." She admitted.

"A bit." Sier commented. "You want me to talk to her?"

"...It might be for the best." Celes sighed. "She can... she can stay in school. The cat's out of the bag now."

"...It'll be alright, Celes." Sier rubbed her shoulder. "People'll be accepting of her quirks."

Celes rubbed her shoulder, a dark expression on her face. "...We can only pray."

Unbeknownst to the two of them, a presence was watching them from the window. Shrouded in black, and obscured under the darkness of the nearby oak, it was impossible to make out his face.

"...They make far too much noise. And they draw far too much attention to themselves." The shadowy figure noted to himself. "I must go and report this at once."

And in the blink of an eye, he was gone.

---

Later that night, in the darkest alleys of the industrial sector of Agnes, an entirely different kind of argument was breaking out.

"IDIOTS! USELESS IDIOTS! WHAT DO I EVEN PAY YOU FOR!?"

"Y-you don't pay us, mistress!"

An argument more physical, and more petty in nature. Toil and Trouble went back to report on the day's big haul, but the mistress was having none of it.

The mistress looked more at home in the menagerie of a brothel than out on the streets. She was scantily clad in a bikini that covered up far too little - even with her flat chest. Her green eyes had a devilish glint... appropriate, for it matched her devil horns and tail. Her tail erratically swished back and forth as she "disciplined" her cronies.

"How am I supposed to keep my perfect, effeminate figure when you bring back literal garbage for the pantry!?" She raised the back of her palm, readying for another swing to the side of Toil's head.

"It-it's the thought that counts, miss! It's better than nothing, right??" Toil pleaded.

"NO! Are you stupid!? Nothing would be better than the garbage you brought me!" She spat back. 

"Ah! Mistress Kamika! So you do love it-"

"What? No, that doesn't... SHUT UP!" 

Smack! With a mighty swing, Kamika sent the small creature flying to the far brick wall. He collided with so much force that it left a visible imprint.

"Okie... my aching everything." Toil moaned.

"You see! I told ya! She doesn't like garbage! She's a classy lady, yeah?" Trouble nodded with that smug grin.

"NOBODY LIKES A SUCK-UP, TROUBLE!"

Whack! Kamika whipped her palm right back and sent Trouble into the opposite wall. 

"Ow! Does your smacking arm ever get tired...?" Trouble whined. 

"Okay, Mistress Kamika! I know you're real upset, and you just got a manicure and didn't wanna wreck your nails today..." Toil slowly peeled himself from the wall, staggering to his cloven feet. "But I think you'll be happy to hear what we do have for you!"

"...Ugh, what is it? A half-eaten tangerine?" Kamika rolled her eyes.

"Close!" Trouble muffled, his face firmly pressed against the wall. 

"No! Information!" Toil cut him off, turning back to Kamika. "Y'see, we checked out a high school today, and-"

"You were stalking children? God damn it you two, that's the worst idea. They're starting to pack healthy lunches, and their lunch money is chump change..." Kamika rolled her eyes.

"No, really, we went down to a track meet, and there was this girl, right? A-and she had superpowers!"

"...Awww... I'm sorry, Toil." Kamika put on a pouty face, leaning in a little closer. Of course, he was about half her height, so she had to bend over quite far. Her fine posterior jutted skywards, her tail darting back and forth playfully. 

"...Wuh? Sorry for what?" Toil was a little nervous about how seductively playful Kamika's tone was.

"I fear I might've hit you a liiiittle too hard on the head." She raised the back of her hand once more. "Maybe if I smacked it again, it'll knock it back into place..."

"NO! It's true! She stretched her body out, like, twenty feet! Like a snake! Or an elastic band!" Toil was beginning to tremble.

"He is not lying. I can corroborate his story."

An ominous voice cut through the air, coming from deeper within the alley. Kamika's attention drew away from the incompetent gargoyle, and towards the voice in the alley. Her eyes lit up.

"Ah! Double-Double!" She raised her arms. "Step forward. It's been ages since I've seen you."

The shadowy figure emerged from the shadows. Garbed in a jet-black cowl, two blades dangling from his waste. His cloven hooves echoed through the alley, and two horns poked out from just underneath the hood of his cowl. Yet another demon... and yet, one not quite on the same level as Toil and Trouble.

"My mistress," Double-Double kneeled before her. "I heard word of the strange girl, and investigated the matter myself. Toil and Trouble are genuine in their assertions."

"Heeeeey, wait a second! How in the hell do you know about the girl?" Toil snapped back, pointing a clawed finger his way.

"Yeah! We never saw you at the track meet! This is our game-changing discovery, not yours!"

"...Of course you didn't see me. You merely didn't look in the right places." Double-Double scoffed. "Of course, rumours dance along the winds, and I had only to follow them. Several dozen witnesses had much to say on the matter."

"Oh! Now I'm interested!~" Kamika took a seat on a nearby barrel, crossing her legs. "Do go on!~"

"There was an argument. A dispute among the girl's clan. I tracked their escape to their home abode, and listened in from the outside. I took careful notes of their entire conversation. And most important..."

He presented a scroll to Kamika. "I obtained her name."

Kamika eyeballed the scroll with some degree of disdain. "Ugh, I know you've been working on your calligraphy, but seriously, this is so pretentious. Just get a notebook. And some dividers." Kamika scoffed, unravelling the scroll at once. 

"I will take that to heart..." Double Double nodded, lowering his head. Kamika squinted as she read what was written. 

"Iris Margaret Fleurs." Kamika read it aloud. "...Fleurs. Where have I heard that before?"

"Ain't that the name of that yuppy what owns the dumb greenhouse up the road?" Trouble muttered. "And he up and got hitched with some freaky jelly wife..."

"...! CELES!" Kamika sputtered. "Th, that upstart bitch from Wisterwood! She had the gall to stand up to me! ME!" Kamika tore apart the scroll in two, tossing it to the alley; Double Double looked a little disappointed at the waste of perfectly good parchment. 

"She's the WORST! Stuck up bitch, think she's so pure and innocent, and then she up and goes fucking around with that guy!? And they START A FAMILY! Ugh, what a fucking HYPOCRITE!" 

Kamika could barely contain her rage, rising to her feet to kick the barrel to the ground. It hit the ground with a harsh slam.

"Hey, yeah, her! Remember the time you gave her that cupcake filled with all those love pheromones?? That was a great prank!" Toil laughed.

"She was SUPPOSED TO FALL IN LOVE WITH ME! And that ASSHOLE HUSBAND OF HERS CURED HER!" Kamika folded her arms. 

"Yeah, you fixed their relationship! It was really a nice thing you did for them!"

"I'M NOT NICE!" Kamika growled. "I'm a succubus! I fuck people and make them love me! It's what I do, Trouble!"

"If I may interject," Double Double raised a gloved hand. "It appears the girl we speak of has her own vendetta with this woman you loathe. Perhaps we should... strike an accord."

"...Ohhhh. I like that. Yeaaaah. Mmhmhmhm. Get back at that scuzzy bitch by getting to her daughter." Kamika stroked her chin, a sly grin coming to mind. 

"...Toil! Trouble!" She raised her head. The two of them stood at attention. "You two know what school this girl... this Iris girl goes to, yes?"

"Uhhh, yeah. The food's kinda lousy though." Toil rubbed the back of his head.

Doing! Kamika flicked him on the nose.

"Idiot. I'm sending you two on a mission..."

---

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