MI Stuff/ Shoptalk- First page thoughts

The first page of a work is one of the most crucial pages you can do! It sets the tone for the art style, for the feel of the story, and the type of characters in it.

I've read a lot of crap comics that start out with a page of text exposition and that just shuts my brain off immediately. Don't start with a text wall. You can start slow and establish your setting and ramp it up from there, you can start with a character or group of characters interacting, or you can start (as I did here) in the middle of the action, aka in media res. Regardless of the specific mode of attack, I generally prefer to write things that I find interesting... I figure if I enjoy drawing and looking at it, the audience will probably enjoy reading it too.

Anyways I drew out page 1 and then scrapped it as soon as I was done, haha (that sucked). The bottom panel was technically where I wanted it but "just okay." I didn't feel anything strong about it and that is usually a warning sign to me... Here are some reasons why I ended up redrawing

• Too much eye movement on the page. The greater the amount of eye movement, the greater the "active feel" of the page. However, this scene is heavy. It should feel like a rock, not like a leaf fluttering around. This isn't a decision made based on quantifiables; it's more about a gut feeling and how you want your reader to react and form expectations. Anyways, you see that I went from a zigazg to a very simple 3 panel drop down. This line of read mirrors both the rope drop from the ceiling, and the heavy quality of the content.
• Lack of focus on the final panel. When there isn't another object called out, people will tend to look at the faces. Here I have two objects to establish clearly, however; the note and the main character (and rope). The note is established in the previous panels so if I had to push it, I'd say Mike should be the focus. The problem is that the paper does not read well next to the wall like that (I gave a lot of negative space around it to try and push with colors, but that still seemed a little jank). If I push it too hard it might look like the primary object. Overall, with the inclusion of a word bubble to link the line of sight with the paper, it would have been pretty much a balance between the three elements (paper, mike's face, word balloon), which is not ideal. The fixed panel has Mike being an unavoidable fixture of the panel. Because he is so prominent, the paper becomes the clear secondary read, and with the corrected flow, it seems like a natural link to the first 2 panels as well.
  
• Lack of establishment. In the first draft, your eye gets stuck between Mike and the paper and the bubble (not shown). So you'd probably end up looking diagonally between the three because the link would be so strong. Very hard to break free and notice anything else. In the correction, your eye goes from Mike to his bubble, then the paper. Because the three elements are so central, you feel pretty secure that you read everything correctly the first go through and your eye will naturally escape the bounds and go roaming around the room. Then you see the bed, cabinets, etc. Much better!

The fun part about making comics is that I think about this stuff with every single page but... you probably do not know. My job is not just to tell the story or draw the pictures, but to guide your eye to the parts that you need to be looking at, and not distract you with frivolous visual noise*. The end result is, ideally, a story that reads cleanly and also gives me a lot of room to lay down "invisible" hooks and surprises that will only become evident on a second or third read. This it the kind of story that I most enjoy reading, and hopefully the kind of story that I get to make for you :]

*one last bit of excised visual noise... I deleted the wrinkly tarp Mike is sitting on in the original first page, since I thought it would be pointlessly confusing without an editors note. But that was a waterproof surface Mike laid down in case of waste "release" that can happens with hanging, for easy cleanup for whoever would find him... a little morbid. A thoughtful guy to the end, I guess.