HELLLOOOOOO!

It's Sunday. It's 34 degrees here in Gozo, and I am melting!!!!

Before I continue, let me go rescue the raspberries I took out of the freezer to defrost and add it into a cold smoothie, and then I need to move the fan in my bedroom out here to my desk...

OK. Here I am. It's Sunday, like I said, and I try to take a day off on Sundays but not this weekend. Time of the month meant that I had to take a day off yesterday and curl up in a little ball of pain. But one thing I do like to commit to is that one day a week, at least, if not everyday, is about listening to my body and doing what it wants.

I left my boyfriend at the bus stop, and I heard music down the street. They have these festas here in June, which are festivals in each village with music and fireworks at night, and I heard a band playing, so I found myself walking down the hill  and soaking in the scene of locals gathering together in the sun. Then I came back to the house to check my phone and see if any friends wanted to meet up, but I can be very particular about who I spend my time with. The friend I wanted to see was with another mate of his, and I wasn't in the mood for chit chat. I check in with my body and see if it's a yes, a FUCK YES! or a hmmm not really feeling it. I try and avoid the not really feeling its.

 I notice that when I follow my intuition I always seem to be in the right place at the right time. A few nights ago, it was 11.30pm and I just wanted to go down to the bar and see a friend. I ended up talking to a guy I've seen many times, and it turned out he was a really talented artist, and maybe he would like to sell his stuff in our new shop.

I am feeling a message come up in my body, that's telling me something, so I am going to pause and check in. You might think I'm weird, but I guess you already know that if you've been around here before, right?! 

One of my original YouTube followers once said on that I reminded him of Dory on Finding Nemo! I can be like that. So many things that I want to do. I start one thing...and then something else comes up...I've learned to be at peace with myself as much as I can, because on the positive side, it's just because there's so much in this world that I love. 

Back to the message that my body is trying to tell me:

So the conversation inside myself went something like this

voice 1 " your followers don't care about writing about what you did last week, they just want to see your videos"

voice 2 "but I need to explain where I've been and why I've been so random with my videos lately"

voice 1 "just make a video"

voice 2 " but I'm on my period, I haven't shaved, my cold water hasn't been working, i haven't had a shower, i look like sh!t"

voice 1 " yeh, but that's why it's an authenticity challenge, you've got to do it no matter what comes up, it doesn't have to be violent, but you at least need to share how difficult it is to share right now"

voice 2 "yeh but my iphone is crap, there's so much sun on the terrace it will be impossible to film, I don't feel like filming inside, I can't find the plug to my canon camera so the quality won't be good, and I don't even want to see if my tripod works with my iphone, as I know I have so little patience for technical issues right now, I'm already feeling crap about myself"

voice 1 "cut the crap and just do it"