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jephjacques
jephjacques

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Unused Comic Script

Here's something that doesn't happen very often- I wrote this comic but decided not to actually draw it because I changed my mind about how the whole "Anh comes to Faye's apartment" thing should play out. Here's the original script:

1

Anh: Huh. It’s cleaner than I was expecting.

Faye: What’s THAT s’posed to mean?

Bubbles: Thank you, Anh. We strive to keep a tidy ship.

2

Pintsize: Ah, the delightful Ms. Dang! Welcome! You may remember me from the wedding-

Anh: Halfpint, right? Can you put this wherever coats go? I’m taking a shower.

3

Pintsize: A shower, you say? I would be THRILLED to act as your personal bathing accessory-

Anh: Let’s get one thing straight, blue boy.

4

Anh: I am the young, beautiful daughter of a COLOSSALLY wealthy tech entrepreneur. I’ve been dealing with men making crude remarks at me since I was in a TRAINING BRA. I have developed an IMMUNITY.

5

Anh: Normally, I’d say this is the last time I’ll acknowledge it at all, because it is BENEATH ME. But Bubbles just taught me how to throw a punch, so if you want to keep trying your luck, feel fucking free.

6

Pintsize: Oh no I’m in love with her

Faye: You are not allowed to be in love with her.

Anh off panel: Wait, your shower is also a tub? Is this NORMAL?

I decided not to run with this script for a couple reasons- I wanted to move the story along a tiny bit faster, and as funny as Anh Giving Pintsize The Business is, I wasn't sure I wanted their relationship to be that adversarial. I was able to recycle a bunch of stuff from this script into the most recent comic with Marten and Faye having a phone call anyway!

You can also see how bare-bones my scripts are- I pretty much only write down the dialog unless there's some extremely specific art thing I'm worried I'll forget about when it comes time to draw it.

That's it! Hope you enjoyed this little peek behind the scenes.

Comments

" I wanted to move the story along a tiny bit faster..." are truly words I thought I'd never hear from Jeph! Seriously though, while I do appreciate the momentum, I think something important has been lost by leaving this out. In every strip so far, Anh has been either petty and selfish and awful, or pathetic and pitiable and feeling sorry for herself. This script is the first time I've actually been rooting for her. And I think pintsize would respect her for it too - he enjoys getting a rise out of people but he doesn't want to actually *hurt* them, and he'd back off when Anh expresses a clear boundary. And frankly, if Anh gets Pintsize to respect her just by standing up for herself, then I think Faye would respect Anh *and* Pintsize a bit more after witnessing that interaction. So I hope that some version of this works its way back into a future script.

Josh

Anh needs to keep punching things because I love the Strongbad references. I also want Anh henceforth to have the two ahoge and that they be named Ali and Ali's sister.

David Grimes

...i ship it

Crawler00

A great script always evokes appropriate mental imagery. No need to draw this one Jeph, I can already 'see' everything... The look on Faye's face is utterly priceless 😂😂 Bravo.

Shannon Woodbury

It would be kind of funny if every new character to meet Pintsize IMMEDIATELY put him in his place wonder if that would give him a complex D=

Minzoku Bokumetsu

That was fun!

Anna L Goebel

I am looking forward to offhand comments from Anh, now and then, that keep Pintsize in his place, as Pintsize digs her ever more for the sass.

Ursus Ridens

Thanks for sharing, Jeph! An interesting variation on what you ended up using.

SilverbackRon

my writing coach would always tell me to "kill your babies". cutting down a long exchange like this into what ultimately became the comic is what makes the comic so good. keep it up!

Robert Weber

Very "Hillary Clinton in a tiny apartment meme"

Terry Parry


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