I can't believe it.

I have been Vegan for 4 years. I haven't eaten meat, dairy and eggs. I thought it was the best thing to do for my health and many of the bad things the world is facing. I thought it was the right thing to do. 

It wasn't mainstream. It seemed like doctor didn't want you to follow it. Probably they hid this big health secret from the world. Yet I was so wrong.

After eating one egg, I came back to life. I felt grounded. I felt relaxed, calm and a feeling of satiation that I haven't felt in years.

When eating Vegan I was constantly overeating. Constantly wanting to eat more. What was going on? It couldn't be the diet. It was the healthiest!

I need to process what I did to myself. For someone who has never made a diet switch like this it might be hard to understand. But I was a zombie compared to myself the last 12 days. I had no life within me.

Because I had no life, I was always looking for something to make me feel better. To make me happier and more energetic. To get rid of all the problems in my head. I felt low, even though I kept smiling. I have always been good at smiling. So I would have rarely given away I was feeling bad. That I was sometimes thinking about not existing anymore.

NoFap, meditation, cold showers, yoga and switching up my diet from time to time did help. But eventually I turned depressed again. Depression is real. I didn't know I was having it until I came out if it. It is a dark place. It is terrible there. 

I want to hug my old self and tell her how her diet is destroying her. I never had a person being straightforward to me about it. Except my mom at times. But I also slowly got distant from her.

What have I done to myself?

This was such a big life lesson. I am never gonna go back to a vegan diet. I was brainwashed so hard. They grab you with emotional stuff, as a girl you are easily manipulated by it. I was also not feeling my best when going Vegan. A common thing I have heard is that people find veganism when they are depressed. 

My health was declining. Peeing every hour or more, felt so lethargic, I was taking naps this last half year (which I never done before). Two weeks ago I couldn't lift up my next due to terrible pain, my eyes were swollen, hands itchy, acne got worse, my joints ached, my strength lessened. I would never recommend a Vegan diet to anyone.

I will be soon making posts here again. Continuing helping out with NoFap, but I will also share other content. I will also be giving a E-book to all of you for free when it is out!