The Naked Gun: A Proper Movie Trilogy (VIDEO SCRIPT)

The Naked Gun: From the Files of Police Squad, The Naked Gun 2 and a half: The Smell of Fear, and the Naked Gun 33 and a third: The Final Insult

Not only has this franchise cemented the late great Leslie Nielsen as the king of Spoof Comedy, but the interconnections and continuity within its own universe has also helped establish the three films as a trilogy. But is it a PROPER trilogy? And if its not, then how can we make it one? Let’s find out.

INTRO

The Naked Gun was released December 2, 1988. It was directed by David Zucker of Airplane!, and written by he and his younger brother Jerry, along with Jim Abrahams and Pat Proft

/It focuses on Nielsen’s Detective Frank Drebin of police squad, who -- after returning to Los Angeles to clear his head from his recent divorce -- meets Pricilla Presley’s Jane Spencer in a case that almost took the life of his fellow Police Squad officer Nordburg, and soon unravels to reveal a plot to assassinate Queen Elizabeth II during her visit to america involving mind-controlled assassins that he has to foil/

The film was conceived as a follow-up and soft reboot to Zucker Abrahams and Zucker’s short-lived 1982 Police Squad television show following their success with the disaster movie spoof Airplane!, canceled after only 6 episodes.

Itself being a spoof of police procedurals, a lot of individuals accredited the cancellation to the fact that the humor wasn’t easy to recognize; that you really had to pay attention to things in order to get the jokes.

So when it was reworked as a movie 6 years later, keeping Leslie’s character Frank Drebin while recasting for Captain Hocken and Officer Nordberg, Zucker Abrahams and Zucker had yet another hit on their hands.

/Coming in with a runtime of just under an hour and a half and parodying police dramas and procedurals like the original television show did 6 years before it, The Naked Gun gained critical acclaim and was deemed one of the greatest comedy films of all time, generating 140 million dollars on a 12 million dollar budget/

The Naked Gun 2 and a Half: The Smell of Fear was released 3 years later, with David Zucker returning as director and co-writer along with Pat Proft this time around; Jerry and Jim served as executive producers, and only received a writing credit due to their contributions to the first film and the Police Squad series.

/This time Frank and Police Squad, now being honored for their service by at the time President Bush in Washington DC, has to stop a plot by big oil, coal, and nuclear conglomerates that involves the kidnapping of an environmental scientist on track to propose utilizing renewable energy to fuel the nation in order to stay in business; a topic that is absolutely a product of its time and not at all relatable 31 years later, what are you talking about? Meanwhile, Frank’s relationship with Jane is fractured, and he has to make up his mind which is more important; his love for Jane or his love for his job./

While critics cared for it a bit less than the first movie, Naked Gun 2 and a Half still did pretty good with moviegoers, moving Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves starring Kevin Costner, Alan Rickman and a still relatively unknown Morgan Freeman from number 1 to number 2 during the summer of 1991.

/And along with such a feat, it generated a total of 192 million in the box office with a budget of 23 million; raking in 41 million more in profit than the first Naked Gun 3 years ago./

As you can imagine, another installment in the franchise was pretty much inevitable at this point. However, David Zucker would only co-write the film with Proft this go around instead of co-write and direct. That job went to Tommy Boy and Nutty Professor 2 director Peter Segal, while Jim and Jerry stayed on as executive producers and received a writing credit for their participation in the franchise overall.

So with the changes in place, The Naked Gun 33 and a third: The Final Insult was released 3 years after the release of The Smell of Fear; March 18, 1994.

The change of direction was definitely felt past production lines as it warranted a different style of comedy that the first two were prominently known for, had a relatively shorter run-time, was the lowest ranked of the trilogy and made the least in box office profits out of the three; 132 million on a 30 million dollar budget

Nevertheless, the fact that this would be the last time we would see this iteration of Frank Drebin, Police Squad and The Naked Gun franchise in general until talks of a reboot started in 2013, there’s no doubt that it and Zucker Abrahams and Zucker’s contributions to spoof and parody has helped set the bar for the craft for a lot of people who enjoy these types of movies; The Wayans being perfect examples.

But at the end of the day, The Naked Gun franchise is still a spoof franchise. And while because there are only 3 films it can be considered POSSIBLE to see if it meets the quality of a trilogy -- let alone be a proper one -- the question stands not only if spoof and parody movies should even be considered, but if they’re worth the time and energy to retrofit them into one?

Eddache: (Off camera) Psst. Hey! La’Ron! Over here!

Me: (Confusingly looks off screen and reacts to something happening off camera before leaving and moving to his computer workstation) What the hell...?

Eddache: Hello!

Me: Eddache from the YouTube channel Eddache? What are you doing on my computer? In animated form? Acting as if you’re conscious of my real-life activities?

Eddache: Oh, that’s because I am. I heard you’re making a video about Spoof Movies, so I thought I’d invite myself in!

Me: (Shocked) you took over my PC?

Eddache: Yep

Me: So you saw me record all of that just now?

Eddache: Yep

Me: What the hell, man? I didn’t consent to any of this! What if I wasn’t wearing pants?

Eddach: ...Are you?

Me: (pauses) Y-Yes... (clears throat) Anyway, since Eddache is now also here, let’s see if Naked Gun fits under the Proper Trilogy Lens

Eddache: (VO): Stand up

Me: ...No

Eddache: (VO) Go on, stand up.

Me: NO!

CURRENT STANCE

/If I can be completely honest with you Readers, I -- probably like you -- wasn’t expecting to cover this trilogy. Like, at all. Honestly, the only reason I remembered that it was even a TRILOGY was because of Eddache over here!/

Eddache: Oh, so it’s MY fault!

Me: (Confusingly pauses) ...Yes.

You explaining the history of the short-lived Police Squad series being a spoof of police dramas and how the Naked Gun franchise was a soft reboot-slash-spinoff of it in your video about spoofs reminded me that there were, in fact, three movies. So technically, this IS your fault!

Eddache: Oh yeah! Fair enough, carry on!

Me: Thank you...

Anyway, the fact of the matter is that considering the trilogies I’ve covered so far, some people might be of the mind that since the Naked Gun franchise is a spoof franchise, that fact alone might take away some legitimacy to whether or not the trilogy is even POSSIBLE to be made proper, let alone be even be considered a trilogy to begin with.

My response to this is... (shrugs) That’s fair.

Spoof films, despite being comedy films in nature, are meant to either be pastiches of tv and film properties -- imitations of the IPs for the sake of celebrating the genre they represent -- or flat out parodies of the properties.

And while they usually do well with movie audiences depending on what the genre or property they’re referencing or parodying in the film, they’re rarely taken seriously enough to even consider giving them the time and development to properly flesh out the story and characters connected to it.

/Nobody takes the Scary Movie franchise seriously, because it’s a parody of current scary movies and pop culture while being a pastiche to Kevin Williamson’s one-two slasher horror combo of the early 2000’s; I Know What You Did Last Summer and Scream. And despite it getting sequels with a returning cast, there’s no overarching narrative or development that carries over from movie to movie; they’re only vehicles made to parody the current horror and suspense movies that’ve come out and gained popularity within the last 3 or so years./

/And while The Naked Gun can be looked at in the same light, you have to consider the spoof film that came before it that was also made and written by the Zucker's “Airplane!” and factor that as to why the trilogy isn’t immediately considered one that has the means to be taken seriously enough to apply the formula for it to be considered a proper one. Let alone consider if there are story beats, themes and a plot within the movies that allow it that possibility./

This was exactly my thought process when I decided I needed to refresh myself with the Naked Gun trilogy.

/Growing up, I never saw 1, I had only seen clips of 2, and 3 -- despite its low-brow comedy in comparison to the first two and its blatant transphobia just for the sake of making a Crying Game reference -- was the only one I had seen in its entirety./

Naked Gun 3 was also the first time I saw that OJ Simpson was in a movie, who at the time I only knew about not as a football star, but as...something else

(Play “He was such a good man, he never wanted to hurt anyone” scene from NG1, then stare at camera) Who’s gonna tell her?

The point I’m trying to make is that since my experience with spoof and parody movies after first experiencing the Naked Gun franchise like I did, I had a feeling that that whatever story or plot that the films had upon my refresher would be minimal at best, because it’s first and foremost a vehicle for jokes, slapstick and pratfall.

But it turns out that even if you take away the aforementioned aspects of parody associated with The Naked Gun, there are actually pretty solid skeletons for speculative action story plots in all three movies.

/The Naked Gun’s plot of using mind control to assassinate Queen Elizabeth while visiting Los Angeles is very much along the lines of a lot of some of the dramas with grounded science fiction themes we’ve recently received. Like the The Winter Soldier and the Denzel Washington remake of The Manchurian Candidate. 2 and a half’s plot of using a hired actor to sabotage the nation’s plan of utilizing renewable energy in favor of big oil, nuclear and fossil fuel companies is an espionage plot that we receive on the regular at this point. And there are so many action and suspense movies that has 33 and one-third’s plot of stopping a bomb from blowing up an american event or landmark it’s ridiculous!/

While the comedic hijinks and parody help establish The Naked Gun franchise as its own thing, underneath it is a frame that has a solid foundation capable of not just solid stories in their own right, but also enough interconnectivity within their own plots and timeframes to apply the proper trilogy formula while still be capable of producing the type of comedy that it does.

Because surprisingly enough, the Naked Gun films have within their framework the capability of being a proper movie trilogy. But despite the pieces being in place for “The Final Insult” to expand on what the first film established, it’s never really taken advantage of. Allow me to explain.

THE THREAD

/As I stated beforehand, Readers; Naked Gun 33 and a third is the weakest of the three movies, both in comedy and ethics./

It’s also the shortest of the three movies as well, which doesn’t really help its case in what it could’ve helped contribute not only to the underutilized thread The Final Insult brought over from the first Naked Gun, but also how to better tie itself in to the main theme that’s been consistent in every Naked Gun movie

Eddache: In Naked Gun 1, Frank is at the top of his game, taking out political figures in a timeless scene that has definitely aged well (2 mins). However, his fellow officer and best friend, Nordberg gets shot during a drug bust and it’s up to Frank to clear his name (23:22). This time, it’s personal.

However, during his investigation, he meets Jane (21:44 “nice beaver” “thanks, I just had it stuffed”). She is Ludwig’s assistant, she doesn’t know that Ludwig is responsible for what happened, so he uses her to get close to Frank and the pair fall in love (39:07). But soon Frank’s work life and his love life clash together during an assassination attempt on the Queen (1:14:09) and he has to save her life. Even when Jane turns sleeper agent to kill Frank, it’s Frank’s proposal to her that breaks the spell (1:17:00).

However, in Naked Gun 2, the pair have long broken up (21:23 third hand slap), Jane is unable to go through with the wedding because Frank prioritises his job over her (21:40 “all you love is your police work”). However, Frank, fuelled by jealousy and bitterness, finds out that Jane’s new boyfriend is the main suspect. This time, it’s personal-ler. When he actually turns out to be right, Frank and Jane rekindle their love (47:40 reunited) and while their lives are in danger, pledges to be a changed man (01:11:18 “Jane I promise you, if we make it out alive, I’ll never let my police work interfere with our love again”). Which he proves by turning down his dream promotion (01:14:40 offered promotion) to be with her. (1:16:33)

In Naked Gun 3, Frank has retired from police work, (9:32) fully committing to the domestic life of a house husband but their relationship is still strained as Jane wants children (11:18) and Frank is unable to perform in bed (12:37 “which one of you is impotent?”... “which one frigid” “that’s him also”). Frank is clearly unfulfilled in life without his police work and agrees to be pulled in for one more job. When Jane finds out she is betrayed (24:23 “you’ve been back on another case, haven’t you?”). And she once again leaves him (24:39 the insta-change of clothes) because Frank cannot change who he is (25:08 “I am what I am”... “I’m a cop!”). As Frank goes undercover, Jane becomes convinced he is cheating on her with another woman leading her to the gang hideout, (47:00) once again getting her involved in Frank’s work and endangering her life. This time, it’s personalest. She finally acknowledges Frank is happier being a cop. (1:10:20 “I was wrong, taking you away from police squad was a mistake. I know now that’s why you can’t perform decent sex with me” “!”) The pair once again rekindle and look to a future with a newborn baby.

The Naked Gun series serves as an exploration of Frank Drebin's relationship to his work and to his love, how the two get constantly tangled together, and testing Frank on what his heart really desires. Oh no wait I’m wrong, Naked Gun is actually the story of Weird Al’s fall from grace, going from famous celebrity to a criminal gunman. (NG1 8:24 / NG2 25:04)

Me:(Gobsmacked before looking at the camera) I-I mean I was gonna say that there was a message of balancing life and work in the narrative of the trilogy hidden under all the comedy, but yeah! W-What Ed said

And while all that subtext helps establish what the theme is that’s carried over from movie to movie, it’s important to remember that just because the THEME of the trilogy is one way, doesn’t mean that the THREAD of the trilogy has to resemble it.

They can be related, sure, but there’s a difference between something that all three movies in a continuity have in common with each other narrative wise, and and something that links the third installment to the third in order to bring things full circle.

Now remember, Readers. In order for a trilogy regardless of its medium to be considered a proper one, the main thing that plays a factor is that there always has to be an element of the first film’s plot that plays a significant role in the third in a way that makes all three films work together as one cohesive story.

From there, you can use the third film to reveal new information about what's being carried over from the first, and expand upon it in various ways; the most common form being a plot twist.

The irony here is that you’d think that such a thread from the first movie wasn’t present in The Final Insult because of the one-two combo of it being a parody film and just...not as good as the previous two. But it actually does.

And to make matters worse, not only is it one that doesn’t do anything new or interesting with what we learned or experienced in the first Naked Gun movie, but it also could’ve played a strong role in Frank’s development and overall struggle with his dedication to Police Squad Eddache mentioned earlier

So what’s the plot thread I’m talking about? Well, it’s the one villain character that has been the only constant within the trilogy of Naked Gun movies.

The one that’s been the middleman for the group of terrorists that we see Frank beat up in the beginning of 1, hired Ludwig to kill Queen Elizabeth and then hired Rocco to blow up the Academy Awards in 3, all on their behalf.

The one that despite being the only villain to be used in more than one Naked Gun movie, the Zucker’s never fully utilized him, even in the slightest.

/I’m of course talking about Pahpshmir./

Eddache: You know, it wasn't until La’Ron pointed it out that I even remembered Pahpshmir was the same character from the 1st Naked Gun, so the significance of his appearance in Naked Gun 3 went totally over my head. I feel like more could have been done to make it clear who this character was. A recap, a flashback to Naked Gun 1 but from his perspective, something. Maybe a presence in Naked Gun 2 to cement his position as being Frank Drebin's Moriarty. Then him appearing in Naked Gun 3 would carry more weight. As it is, it feels tacked on. Like lip service or a glorified cameo appearance. You could easily replace him with a brand new character or even cut the scenes and it'll have little impact. In fact, I would even speculate that the character who gives Rocco the job was never meant to be Pahpshmir, but when they found the actor was available they altered the part to be him instead.

Me: I mean, it’s true and he should say it...

Ed’s 100% correct in this regard; there’s unlimited potential AND ROOM for Pahpshmir to be Frank’s Moriarty in the Naked Gun trilogy; both for laughs and to be played straight for story purposes.

But not only is Pahpshmir completely forgettable despite being the key factor in getting the ball rolling regarding everything Frank deals with over the course of the trilogy, but his role in The Final Insult is so miniscule that you could’ve easily replaced him with someone else looking to hire Rocco to cause some trouble.

/There’s an extended version of the scene where Frank enters the prison and passes the multiple inmates that has the lion that mauled Hapsburg to death from 2 and a half as one of the inmates in order to have a gag that also established proper continuity over the course of the series, but Pahpshmir doesn’t get more of a role in the movie despite being the author of all Frank’s pain?/

Despite his importance to the skeleton of Naked Gun as a whole, Pahpshmir is -- and forgive the pun here -- treated as a joke. Thankfully, Ed and I have a way to make Pahpshmir’s role in the Naked Gun trilogy no laughing matter. (Pause) Okay, THAT pun was intended. Let me break it down for you.

THE RECONSTRUCTION

/In “The Naked Gun: From the Files of Police Squad,” terrorist middleman and organizer Pahpshmir witnesses Frank Drebin bust a meeting of his clients in Beirut before operating on their behalf to hire Vincent Ludwig to assassinate Queen Elizabeth during her visit to Los Angeles/

Eddache: And in “The Naked Gun 33 1/3: The Final Insult,” terrorist middleman and organizer Pahpshmir -- this time with a mustache -- hires infamous bomber Rocco Dillon to target the Academy Awards, once again on the behalf of the same group of terrorists he did business with 6 years ago

Me: So let’s better establish Pahpshmir’s importance to the machinations of the franchise, in order for his actions to have more weight than the trilogy originally suggested it did.

In order to do this, we first have to take a look at the thread that is his presence in the first Naked Gun movie.

/He was present in the meeting with his clients in Beirut as they discussed ways of attacking America in ways that would allow them to be present during peace talks of some kind, and witnessed Frank bust each and every one of them. So he knows who Frank is and that he’s with Police Squad. Mostly because before his escape, he loudly proclaimed (Frank Drebin, Police Squad). Then afterwards, we see him meet with Ludwig in Los Angeles in order to hire him on his clients behalf in order to kill Queen Elizabeth with his mind-control technology./

When we meet Pahpshmir again, he’s still canonically working for the terrorists from the first movie.

/It’s unclear if he’s still setting up homegrown acts of terror on their behalf because they want his setups to get them involved in peace talks, but it is clear that Pahpshmir hiring Rocco to bomb something big in Amerca like the Academy Awards is an indicator that an act of terror against the nation is the overall goal regardless if they’re still interested in being involved in whatever peace talks the first movie alluded to./

So since Pahpshmir and his actions-slash-connections is the thread being brought over from the first Naked Gun to the third, we have to take that information that its story formed around it and expand it in the third one.

Pahpshmir knows who Drebin is because he beat up his clients, and Pahpshmir knows that Drebin stopped Ludwig from killing the queen because the plan and his payment of 2 million dollars didn’t go through. All this is present according to how The Naked Gun 1 played out.

So what is a natural evolution of Pahpshmir’s presence in 33 and a third according to what he did and learned in Naked Gun 1? Have him play the terrorists for fools.

/To Pahpshmir, if an imbecile like Frank Drebin can easily sneak into one of their meetings and beat them senseless, then he can clearly use them as a means to an end./

So in The Final Insult, we’ll have it be revealed that after that happened in the beginning of the first movie, Pahpshmir agrees to be their liaison only so he can swindle them out of money and keep whatever payment his hired american help ask for whenever he works a job they forward him.

/Even if the plans he kept in motion by the in-country terrorists were pretty much foolproof and ingenious, it really wouldn’t have mattered if the attacks succeeded or not; his setup with the terrorists meant that he would be paid no matter what. This point would only be proven true when Frank Drebin once again involved himself in Pahpshmir’s affairs by taking down Ludwig and his mind control assassin technology in his failed effort to assassinate Queen Elizabeth, and continued to ring the terrorists around for as long as he could./

But by the time The Final Insult happens, his clients learned that he was using them since Drebin busted them in Beirut. While it doesn’t matter if an attack is successful or not, they think Pahpshmir is sabotaging every attack on America he plans for them. Mostly because they’re all idiots.

So they threaten to take his life if this next attempt to attack America wasn’t successful. This is no big deal for Pahpshmir, since he has it set up to where the attack delivers the desired results and he can still swindle them of their budget in order to keep it for himself. But now he has to keep a close eye on things to make sure that it ACTUALLY is successful, and that means making sure Frank Drebin doesn’t involve himself like the last time.

/So knowing that Frank is retired, Pahpshmir hires Rocco while he’s in prison to blow something up for 5 million, Rocco gives the Academy Awards as his target, and he begins plans for his escape. Then Frank involves himself by going undercover as the main plot of the movie undergoes./

But instead of Rocco and the gang leaving Frank and Jane with his mom to put out of commission at the parking lot near the third act of the movie, they all meet Pahpshmir on the parking lot rooftop instead. The moment between Frank and Pahpshmir is played straight, Frank finding him familiar and Pahpshmir immediately outing Frank as a cop -- a Police Squad cop -- and both he and Jane are captured.

We get flashbacks to Frank’s bust in the first Naked Gun movie, only from Pahpshmir’s point of view as we see strategic -- yet comedic -- ways he took advantage of the terrorists after the incident.

He reveals to Frank that he hired Ludwig to kill the queen, causing Frank to have a stereotypical “It was you all along” reaction type speech that’s usually given by the hero of stories like this whenever they meet a mastermind.

/So because Pahpshmir needs this job to go off without his involvement, Rocco’s mom Muriel, who never liked Frank when she thought he was a criminal that helped Rocco escape prison, agrees to watch Frank and Jane and position them in the building so they can die in the bomb while Rocco and Peters go to plant the bomb in the envelope containing the winner for Best Picture. Assured, Pahpshmir gives a villainous goodbye to Frank, gets on his helicopter, and watches from the safety of the skies. The rest of the movie -- for better or worse -- plays out from there./

Eddache: This would give Pahpshmir presence in the film way more value. Once again, Drebin is up against an old nemesis, someone he thought he had dealt with and could move on from.

I emphasized that much of the three films is about Frank's relationship between his work and his partner and testing him on which he values more. In Naked Gun 3, he’s trying to move on with his life but, he's once again pulled back in to Police Squad, and this time it's by the very same person pulling the strings back in Naked Gun 1.

In this way Pahpshmir could represent the darker elements of the Police Squad. The part Jane fears the most, the thing that could take Frank away for good. After all, comparatively, all his scenes are played mostly straight, with little spoof elements, because he's the serious threat. So for Frank to take out Pahpshmir is to finally take out the thing preventing him from moving on with a happier life.

But without this confrontation, without this closure, does Frank even know Pahpshmir is involved? Just seems incidental, and therefore irrelevant.

Maybe this is down to the more disposable nature of spoof movies. Maybe an encounter with Pahpshmir would be too pace-breaking so they stuck to jokes. One may make more narrative sense, especially as part of a trilogy, but like how Frank had to decide what he values more, maybe the creators had to decide if they valued comedy over story.

I always found Naked Gun 3 to be the weaker of the trilogy, it goes for more low hanging fruit than the others, becoming closer to a fratboy-sex-comedy-romp than the deadpan noir parody (it was the 90s after all) so maybe these relatively minor alterations could have let the finale of Frank Drebin go out with a bang.

(“It’s The Bomb!” gag from NG3)

CONCLUSION

Readers, I think it's safe to say that thanks to the existence of The Naked Gun, spoof and parody movies -- depending on what they represent overall -- can be looked at with the same amount of love, care and attention as the stories they imitate and reflect. Because never in my wildest dreams would I have imagined this franchise had so many machinations regarding actual storytelling behind it.

And while The Naked Gun 33 and a third: The Final Insult has its own fair share of problems in comparison to the humor and gags that were present in the two movies before it, it’s very easy to see the potential it had to not only ring the franchise out with a slew of laughs and story, but also establish the entire franchise as a proper movie trilogy.

Eddache: *Ahem*

Me: ...What?

Eddache: Well, aren’t you going to thank me for putting this trilogy on your radar in the first place?

Me: Well, that depends. Are you going to apologize for hijacking my computer in order to be part of this video and make your leave?

Eddache: Um, actually I don’t know HOW to leave. HELP!

Me: (Sighs) Alright, just give me a few minutes to wrap things up here and I’ll help you out.

So yeah (stares back at computer) Thank you...Eddache...for helping me out with this video.

Eddache’s own video on spoof films was what reminded me that this franchise did technically count as a trilogy, so make sure you check that out when you have some free time. And just check out his channel in general, he makes some great videos

And if you want to see us work together again, I recently helped him out with a video on his channel about catch phrases; something I’ve DEFINITELY experienced growing up as a lover of movies and television.

Right now you can watch the entire Naked Gun trilogy on Paramount Plus.

But if you want to both own the movies and help financially support the channel, I’ll have affiliate links to the movies in the description box below.

So with that being said Readers, your homework assignment for the day:

Write in the comment section below what YOU thought of the Naked Gun trilogy if you’ve seen it

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