Monster Essays: Mermaids/Merfolk

I had started a story and had mermaids in mind for a long time now, but it took me a little while to pinpoint how to actually sexualize them and make them fun. It didn’t take long for me to go to my default; amazon warrior culture where every merfolk is ripped as hell and kind of a bimbo/himbo by living in a completely different culture and environment than us for lifetimes. There’s still mermaid princesses, but they can bench-press you, chew through bones, bullseye a spear from across the room, and probably talk like a ditzy Starfire from Teen Titans.

Dylan Eywind

History of Interspecies Relations II

In Too Deep. The History of Merfolk

**A+. A difficult topic handled wonderfully. I have to question what you would have written on mermaid culture a year ago given your earlier works.**

Like many of the revealed races of the world, merfolk (the combination of mermaids or mermen, specifically) were a long-hidden secret. They are among the few races that avoided humanity by sheer coincidence, having lived near the bottom of the ocean for centuries. While their appearances as fish tails with humanoid upper bodies was accurately portrayed by human myths, the finer details proved to be easily overlooked.

Your average merfolk is roughly the size of a dolphin or shark, so around 7 to 10 feet long from tail to head. Largely human torsos grow from their upper bodies, with sharper teeth capable of chewing through scales and bones.  This can be difficult to gauge given their differing postures and the fact that they are effectively amphibious. Their dull-colored scaled tails are extremely muscular and sturdy, as are most of their bodies due to constantly swimming. Several feet of their builds are normally used to propel their bodies on land. That is, while they swim similar to most sea creatures underwater, their movement on land is closer to a slithering naga/snake person. While they move at a fairly slow pace like this, even the loss of several feet tends to make them taller than your average human as they traverse the land.

Merfolk possess sealable gills, allowing them to breathe in water or on land by different filters, and have partial control of the color of their skin and hair. They have a natural shade but can change to all manner of colors as a combination camouflage and a means of silent communication while underwater. Even on land, they require large amounts of water to remain healthy; submerging themselves in water every 12-24 hours is recommended but drinking massive amounts of water will do.

Mermaids remain a partially alien culture to many casual observers. As sea-dwellers, their lives involved very different issues and priorities than most humanoids. They had little communication or even knowledge of humanity, and their lives were generally very busy ones. They had some ability to farm, but most of their food came from hunting and gathering. Most merfolk were trained soldiers and hunters, and the constant swimming and chasing of deep-sea fish and monsters leads even the most delicate of their kind to show visible muscle mass. It has led some to compare mermaids closer to amazons than our classic perception of them as seductive sirens; they are actually more prone to work or battle songs, many of which became popular on the surface. Blood In The Water (a metal band with a mermaid as their lead singer) has reached the top ten of the music charts on Buy-Tunes on five different occasions.

The stereotypes do manifest, but in stranger ways than expected. Reaching the surface is no small trip for a merfolk, so they are relatively uncommon and only the most dedicated arrive on dry land. This almost universally requires two things: a courageous attitude and an urge for social interaction. Merfolk culture is an active one, so great deeds, coming of age rituals and basic service to their underwater cities are commonly rewarded with trophies or trinkets symbolizing their actions and accomplishments. There is also the fact that their native language is very high-pitched and musical to communicate through the depths of the ocean when they cannot rely on their body language or color codes of their skin.

The end result is the average land-bound mermaid being very chatty and curious, adorned in numerous pieces of jewelry, and using stilted but rapid English (or whatever language the locals use), giving them a bubbly and ditzy behavior like that of a valley girl or the Japanese gyaru. This clashes quickly with their 8-pack abs, intimidating height/length, weapons training, and muscular arms to give off mixed signals.

Biologically speaking, mermaids are not compatible with land races. Female lay several small eggs through a normally sealed slit while the male excretes a matching fertilizer, at which point a fraction of the eggs will hatch into their young. Courting to mate between partners is a lengthy process in their culture, but short and fickle flings or vaguely erotic affairs are common practices. Any partners willing to keep it “above the waist” with merfolk tend to find them more than willing to keep them satisfied. Merfolk only possess internal genitalia, so they are far more interested in oral or external sex. Their fit figures, exotic beauty, fun personalities, and charming accents and coloration (leading to the Mermaid Blushes In Rainbow meme as a new “ahegao” variant) make them frequently sought after lovers.

While many merfolk remain beneath the depths of their homelands, communications have opened between land and sea that leave us connected. Their advanced and strange technology coordinated with human wireless communications to open channels between us.  We are still sorting through all our differences and the lost history of their people, though there are some implications that their hunting of legendary beasts has possibly saved several coastal cities. The Navy has a much-publicized alliance with them that leaves the seas safer for both sides with our aquatic kin’s cooperation. Some have even adopted the basics of merfolk culture out of camaraderie. In particular, these naval and marine units will tattoo or take trophies after helping take down particularly dangerous sea monsters. The joining of our cultures and technology has expanded our horizons radically, truly resting and rewarding the openness of our minds.