Escape Room Rumble - Ch. 5 (Final) (October 2024)

The final room began with darkness…much like the first. Yor wondered what could possibly be waiting for them this time, and she gripped Loid’s arm wondering if something would scare her.

Slowly, the lights lit up the room, though not brilliantly. The lighting was kept at a warm dim, enough to see the walls and a glass case in the center. The appearance of the room was like that of a museum. Within the glass case wasn’t a fancy necklace or an ancient artifact – but an elaborate big brass key – the final key to complete the last escape room.

Loid smirked and tightened his gloves. He waltzed up to the glass case and was moments away from inspecting it when suddenly an alarm went off. He froze and rolled out of the way. He looked pretty silly doing so that Yor couldn’t help but giggle. It was as if he truly thought his life was in danger. But instead, what had happened was that a series of red security lasers zig-zagged across the room, creating a massive web.

A loud buzzer sounded, so loud that it made them cover their ears. They looked up to see three giant circular lights on the ceiling. The first one turned red, and they immediately understood that if they had two more strikes, they were out.

Loid let out an exasperated sigh at the sight of the lasers. There didn’t seem to be any discernable pattern. They had been scattered seemingly at random.

Yor knew he was too ashamed to admit it – but this was out of his purview. He stared at the massive web of laser beams and uttered, “How…how can we get through this? No human can possibly do this. You would have to be stick thin. Or. At least be able to bend your back at an unnatural angle!”

He sighed again, exhaling all his nerves and frustration. “Figures. This whole place was a scam. They never let anyone actually finish all five escape rooms. It’s like a crane game. You think you’re going to win but the crane is rigged to be too weak. Alas, I think it’s time we---YOR?”

Yor knew it was her time to shine.

She had already stepped through several gaps between the laser beams, moving like a snake. She was currently on all fours arching her back in a bridge pose. She assessed her next move and very slowly limboed underneath a laser beam and stood up. Her abs burned a little but she was used to it from all the yoga.

This is it! I can finally show Loid what I’m made of!

She smiled to herself when she turned her head carefully to see Loid gaping in shock at her noodle-like flexibility. Her hours practicing yoga with Anya finally paid off, as well of course as her years of stalking targets.

We can definitely beat the hi-score!

The glass case gradually came within reach…

But then Yor’s stomach once again trembled…

With such flexible, loose movements, there often came consequences. Yor was so caught up in proving herself that she forgot that yoga and stretching often made her fart. Whenever she had time to practice yoga with Anya, she desperately held in her farts for hours until she was finally alone. But the heavy dinner from before still lingered, still held on with a violent grip to her bowels, seemingly never-ending.

She got stuck in a downward dog position – one laser beam under her belly and another above her torso. Her bowels had loosened and she felt the fart right there in her butt ready to explode.

Loid asked something after she had frozen. She didn’t pay attention to what he had said because all her focus was on trying not to loosen her abs. She had practiced her kegels but a sick stomach was another problem entirely.

The glass case was only a couple feet away. She just needed to find a way to stand up against it without totally letting it rip.

She very carefully brought her knees to her chest into a brief crow position, avoiding the lasers, and drew her legs into her belly. Then she slid down to the floor and inched forward like a worm. Still clenching her butt cheeks, she tensed all over as she brought herself up into a cobra position, and then ever so slowly stood up fully against the glass case.

“FIVE MINUTES LEFT!” Loid cried, pointing at his watch.

But Yor knew it was coming…there was no stopping it. That last move had officially done her in. No matter how hard she clenched her butt cheeks, there was no stopping it. Any second now, she would erupt.

She was stuck in a slim space against the glass case with a wall of laser beams behind her. Her butt was dangerously closed to touching the laser beam behind her. She remained still, trembling, because how else would she hide this monstrous fart that was ready to come out? There was nothing she could blame it on. The room was dead silent. But when she looked up at the three lightbulbs that indicated how many attempts they had left, she suddenly had an idea.

Yor very slightly stuck her butt out.

The buzzer rang.

At the same time, Yor relaxed. She successfully masked the sound of her fart underneath the loud, eardrum-piercing buzzer.

PPPPPPPPPPPPPPPRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBhhhhhhhhhhhTTTTTTTTTTTTtttttt!

The relief was so great she even managed to slip out a grunt of satisfaction.

Loid had gasped - but of course, they were still in the game! 2 strikes out of 3 was still good!

Yor smiled, lifted the glass case from its pedestal, and grabbed the key.

The laser beams vanished. The room fully lit, making them squint after having been accustomed to the dim light, and the exit door was directly ahead of her.

Yor, now with a completely relieved stomach, bolted for the door, even somersaulted. She jammed the key into the lock and the door opened with a grand fanfare. Beyond was a room much like the entrance, with the clerk waiting at a desk reading a magazine. He looked up dully, checked the giant stopwatch timer behind him, and said plainly, "New record."

Loid froze behind her, speechless.

“I didn’t know you could do that,” he said, breathless, even somewhat confused.

Yor cleared her throat and blushed a little. She said dismissively, “It’s the yoga.”

Loid nodded. “That figures.” He slid his arm through hers. “A good wife is flexible.”

Her eyes lit up. “Really?”

They walked through the exit arm-in-arm.