Gold Body Chain (NSFW)

Photos by @eyeandeyephoto (IG)

I've been spending a lot of time reflecting on what freedom really means to me. Financial freedom. Freedom from the limits of my earthly body. Freedom from social programming. Freedom from toxic ties to the past. Freedom from fear.

And at the same time, I've been immersed in a community of like-minded women who see me and accept me... for the first time ever. And we're all evolving towards our best selves, at our own pace. There is this wonderful cohesion among us that it continues to surprise me. I'm so accustomed to chaos disguised as passion.

Between the support I get here and the validation I get from my badass fellow models I'm filled with gratitude and emboldened to push my art ever further. I want to continue to live as an artist and build like an entrepreneur. I want to keep healing my body and feeding my mind.

This body chain was purchased off my wishlist for me by a fan. I had no particular plans to do this or to share this, but this photoshoot shows more than ever before of my vulva. I was feeling so happy to shoot again with a friend, meanwhile my yoga practice has increased in frequency and intensity, and it just felt so fantastic to move my body in uninhibited ways.

I spent much of 2019 trying to 'clean up' my image in order to book more commercial work and stabilize myself before applying to grad school... and then the market bottomed out due to coronavirus. And now my friends in school are doing it all remotely?? But still paying inflated tuition prices that used to be sort of justified because of the value of in-person instruction and networking opportunities. Nevermind that tuition should be free for all citizens, if we're still operating on the for-profit system, then why aren't higher education institutions in the US subject to lowering their tuition to reflect in their reduced ability to deliver value? Watching what my grad school friends are going through really pisses me off and has disenfranchised me from the academic world for the time being.

With this being the 2nd or 3rd major economic crisis of my adult life, I've come to accept that there is no such thing as the 'safe' route. Even the idea of a back-up plan sounds like fantasy to me now... as though I could predict now what would be safe in a future so uncertain. The skills I've developed in marketing and technology are all the back-up I need. I thought going back to school for psychology would give me some purpose, but I've found it along the way here on Patreon (and Onlyfans.) You guys made me realize that grad school is just one of many options, and it's not necessarily a pre-requisite for me to devote myself to the science of the mind. Advanced education is a class signifier as well as a symbol of authority within the academic and professional world. To be clear, I do still want to go back to school, but not until the coronavirus is under control and in-person classes safely resume. For now, learning to shift out of survival mode and into thrive mode is what I'm aspiring towards.

As a result I've also spent more time meditating on how I can nurture my churning curiosity about consciousness and demonstrate the value of my perception RIGHT NOW. The best solution I've come up with is a new Youtube channel where I'll be sharing stories, talks, rants, and musings about the human experience. I can't decide on a name, but I already have lists of topics. Let me know if that's something that would interest you and I'll be sure to let you know when I start.

In the meantime, I'm fully aware of what a special thing we have here, particularly with the Try On Gang. At the root of everything we do is a desire to have fun and be authentic. We'll continue to push the limits of sexuality and satire and good taste here as long as it takes for people to take notice. I still want to get a celebrity producer involved and produce the show for a major streaming platform one day, so stick around and help us make it happen! I'm so grateful to each and every one of you for supporting my freedom and my dreams. It's such a privilege to have you along for the ride xx