Unintended Bonds E7 | I want to show him that I'm worth it

Everyone is over the age of 18

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It was maybe the second time I've received a letter from someone. I think the first one was from a childhood friend that moved away. It was a strange and unusual feeling to see an envelope with a stamp and my name on it. I took it from the kitchen counter to my room to read. 

His penmanship has a sophistication to it, although not all the letters were perfectly rounded nor travelling on an invisible straight line. 

Dear Evan,

I have spent the last two nights thinking about our time together. As much as I want to extend that experience, a part of me knows that this is not sustainable. You are a special young man, and I am certain that you will find your bearings in college and beyond. It isn't fair to you or Janice that I hang on to a thread that isn't mine. 

Thank you for sharing your vulnerability with me. I will always keep that close to my heart.

C

My tears smudge the right side of the first paragraph. I read it and re-read it again. 

As much as I want to extend that experience… 

A thread that isn't mine… 

For always. 

Since the night I went “missing” and spent the night in secret in Carl’s bed, I've been grounded. As stupid as that may sound since I'm 18, I still live under her roof for this last summer. 

This isn't fair. We shouldn't have to give up something that feels so special just because he's older than I am or because he used to date my sister. 

He can’t just take my cherry and make me feel like the most important boy in the world, then snatch it all away. Not like this. 

I dream about his lips touching mine and his moustache grazing my skin softly. I dream about the way he gently slips himself in me, caressing my body and asking me if I'm alright. I dream about the way he makes me take my time, focusing on every second of the experience rather than the orgasm. 

It's not fair. 

I fold up the letter and shove it back into the envelope. I have a little box in the bottom drawer that I use to store my keepsakes — graduation photos…my college acceptance letter..old trading cards. I put Carl’s letter at the bottom and close it up. 

I could tell that Janice was worried about me at dinner. Being just the two of us in the house, we know each other by heart. She asked me what's wrong but I can’t tell her that I'm in love with her ex. Or that I'm heart broken by her ex. 

I read his letter again before going to sleep and then put it under my pillow. It felt like the closest I’d ever come to reaching him again.

I slept a total of maybe 4 hours that night. When I woke up, it was still dark out and I laid there with my eyes opened until the sun came up. I heard Janice leave for an early morning shift at the hospital and then I went downstairs to an empty house. 

I don't even have his number. I can't even text him even though that's all I want to do. 

I can convince him that it's worth it. I know he has the same feeling towards me as well. 

There's only one thing I can do. After eating breakfast, I set out on foot to Carl’s place. If he's working today, then I'll wait outside his place until he gets home. 

His neighbours lounging in their backyard waved at me as I approached Carl’s little fence. “Are you looking for Officer Atos?” I nodded. “He's in the garden. Ask him for my sickle while you're there.” His wife giggles at her husband’s joke. I wave politely and enter the fence. 

He doesn't want to see you. He said so in the letter. 

No. He said he will always keep me in his heart. 

I almost wished he wasn't there. I realized that I had no plan, and I had hoped that everything would just work out when we saw each other. But now, I realize I literally showed up to his house without warning. 

I catch him crouched over a small row of budding plants, inspecting them with his glasses on. He looks up as the breeze closes the gate noisily and then he stands up briskly. 

“Evan? What are you doing here?” His eyes are not as full of light as they usually are. He looks tired. 

I shake my head, having no words to describe what I want to say. Carl looks behind me, as if he's checking to see if his neighbours followed me in. Then, he takes his gardening gloves and dusts off his knees. 

“Are you okay?” Those words remind me of the delicate way he held me in his arms and I started crying. Next thing I knew, I was in his chest breathing in the smell of his cologne and soil. “What's wrong, sport?” 

“Nothing… I got… your letter…” I say between sobs. He caresses the back of my head and neck. 

“Oh Evan, you poor thing.” 

I hug him as tightly as I can. For all I know, this could be the last time I ever do it. He lets me hug him as long as I need, playing with my hair and stroking my back until I run out of tears. 

“You know why we have to stop seeing each other, right?”

“I don't.” I wipe my tears and then look up at his gentle face. He looks like he has tears in his eyes too. 

“I'm at least 25 years older than you,” Carl says with a little chuckle. “You can find a man your own age. And you don't like me. You just like what we did. We all feel that way about our first time.” 

“That's not true.” I run my hands down his strong sides. “This is different.” 

“How would you even know?” Carl says softly and then brushes my hair off my forehead. “Everything is so new for you.” 

“Yes, but,” I pause when it looks like he's about to kiss me. He holds back and I put my hands on his chest, “I know this feeling is real.” 

“Go to college, get roughed up by a couple young stallions your age and we can talk then.” Carl kisses my forehead gently and I sense the energy shift. I tip-toe to kiss him first and he immediately kisses me back. 

Oh my god, this feels so right. 

I claw at the top of his buttons as I try to kiss him deeper. Unable to tiptoe any  further, I resort to groping his muscular chest and then his stomach. 

“Evan…come on, sport. You're making it harder than it has to be.” 

Determined to show him how I feel, I look him in the eye as I undo his belt. He stares at me, but doesn't stop me. Magically, my hands figure out how to get his belt off and I pull his pants down. 

He's excited. I grab his hardening cock and stroke it. Tiptoeing again, we kiss and he breathes heavily in my mouth. 

“Evan…” 

I push the heavier man as hard as I can, and he trips on his lowered pants backwards and falls onto his ass on the bench outside his greenhouse. 

“Sport…”

I drop to my knees and shove my face into his crotch. His neatly trimmed pubes scratch my nose as I devour his manhood down. 

“Oh geez… Evan…” His cock stiffens up like a rock inside my mouth. I suck him in a resolute manner, tactfully using my mouth to pull on every inch of his shaft. “Whoa there....wow, good job.” He twitches in my mouth. 

I roughly pull his pants down further, yanking off his shoes in the process. Deepthroating him passionately, I succeed in pulling his pants off his feet. 

“Okay, you've convinced me. Let's go inside. Oh god!”

Slurp! Slurp! Slurp! 

I add a hand on the bottom of his thick shaft so I can stick my tongue in his foreskin. 

“Oh! Sport, that feels so good…” 

Slurp! Slurp! Slurp! 

I go back to deepthroating him while caressing his inner thigh. I lift with all my might his muscular legs onto my shoulders. The weight of him almost crushes me, but I love the way that it allows me to get him inside my throat. 

He likes it too. 

“Ah! Shit! Ah! Ah!” His dick thickens considerably in my mouth. “That’s going to get me close.” The words trigger a part of my brain that I didn't know existed and I go ballistic in sucking him. His breathing becomes haggard as I relentlessly push him closer to the edge. 

I want him to cum...

I WANT HIM TO CUM...

I NEED HIM TO CUM...

“Oh ..oh…. OH!” His legs jerk on my shoulder and I wrap my hands around his thick thighs while devouring his pole. His bitter seed surges into my mouth and I swallow it all down with pride. His hand grabs the back of my head and I force myself to take him as deep as possible. “OH! Oh…oh…oh….”

I did it.

I made him cum. 

“Jesus, sport. What's gotten into you?” He says breathlessly, with a hint of a smile in his voice. I suckle him for a second longer then climb up onto his lap. He holds my waist to support me and I kiss him deeply. He unashamedly kisses me back, even though I must taste like his cum. 

“Mmm…mmm…” I can't get enough of kissing him. He gropes my erection from outside my pants. 

“What did I say about cumming together?” Carl asks. For once, I can tell that I have the upper hand. His energy is sapped and mine isn't. “We shouldn't keep doing this.”

“I want to be with you,” I say as I hump his hand. 

“You just like the sex.” 

“Fine.” I stop humping him and push up from his chest. “Let's go on a date. No sex. If there aren't any fireworks, then I'll leave you alone.”