I think I'm finally ready to call this one done, or at the very least "as good as it's gonna get in C4D".
Long story short, I landed up going back and overhauling a few of the systems inside the rig, mostly to try and compartmentalize a bunch of stuff but also to clean up the rig evaluation and try to eliminate some redundant calculations and unnecessary point buffers.
In any case, I do believe this rig is the first of its kind. The insanely dynamic nature of the entire technique opens up some rather interesting possibilities, and the shear amount of work that it can eliminate from posing a scene is kinda crazy. I'm actually sort of amazed it works as well as it does in C4D (which I can guarantee you was NOT designed to handle this sort of thing), but then again there is quite a bit of custom code and duct tape holding the entire thing together.
Likewise, since there's nothing really holding me back from working on Float with Friends- I'll probably be starting on that ASAP... only a month late on that one (sorry!). I really didn't expect this particular rig to be as much of a PITA as it was to develop.