5. Family dinner

Days came and went, and I slowly recovered from the fall. 

I could now walk short distances on my own without losing my balance or falling. 

Goldie scolds me when she sees me walking for too long or too far from the walls or furnitures, but I can’t help it; I really want to show Darkie around and I can’t do that without taking some risks!

[Let’s go see the garden, Darkie!] I declared.

I slipped out from my bed by hanging onto the blankets and leaning against the nightstand.

“The garden? But isn’t the garden too far?” Darkie said in his small bunny voice. 

He had started talking shortly after he was made, and since he’s with me all day and all night, I don’t get as bored anymore.

[It’s alright! We can see it from the window across the hallway. All we have to do is go through the door and walk to the opposite wall!]

“Mmmmh… If you really think so…”

While holding Darkie, I walked  toward the door by leaning against the furniture. I peeked out to make sure Goldie wasn’t around.

She would definitely get mad if she saw us.

“Looks clear. Let’s go!” He whispered.

I nodded in agreement and we slipped through the door.

The window may have been right across the hallway, but this one was almost as wide as the room, and to make it worse, the window sill had a bench that I would have to climb on before we would be able to look at the garden.

“Looks kind of dangerous” Darkie mentioned hesitantly.

[I can do it, just need to take it slow.] I replied confidently.

I took a deep breath and looked straight ahead to objective. 

I carefully walked forward, taking small calculated steps. It took me much longer than it would a normal person, but I was able to walk across without falling over.

[See? Told you we would be fine!]

“Wow, Silika! You’re so good!”

[Ohohoho! Thank you! Now, how do we get up there…] Just as I was talking to Darkie, I caught a movement from the corner of my eye. 

I turned my head just in time to find Goldie standing behind me, arms crossed and glaring at me.

[Oh no….]

Oh yes. I could almost see her spell with her lips.

Goldie grabbed me by the collar and dragged me back to the bedroom. 

She sat me on the couch and started scolding me strongly as she held onto my bunny. You would expect scoldings to be easier when you couldn’t hear them, but it actually only made them that much more confusing.

I looked up at her with tears in my eyes. She hesitated for a moment, let out a long sigh and gave Darkie back to me. I immediately hugged him tightly, being apart from him even for a moment made me uncomfortable.

She looked me in the eyes for a few seconds and let out another sigh. 

She mouthed a few words to me and then headed for the wardrobe. I followed her with my eyes as she took out clothes. I got confused when I saw her take out a dress instead of pajamas. It was already late afternoon.

[What is that for?] I asked.

She seemed to mouth an answer but that did little to help me understand. She made me stand up and slipped me into a frilly blue dress with long white sleeves.

[I don’t like this colour…]

 It reminded me of… Well, bad feelings.

It had been so long since I’d seen the rest of the manor. Everything looked the same but also… Colder somehow. We left the east wing and headed down. We then passed the garden and headed toward the north wing, the heart of the estate.

I recognised the hallway to the main dining room. She opened the door and I saw my family seated for dinner, waiting for me.

[Mom!] I called out, but quickly regretted my excitement.

My mother's expression was grim and only grew worse at my words. My father looked at me coldly, Knox’s jaw clenched and Ela simply looked away. The only one who looked remotely happy to see me was my younger brother, Dalton, who was staring at me expectantly. 

I tightened my grip around Darkie. 

"It's okay, Silika! I'm right here and so is Goldie!" He said from my arms.

Goldie walked me up to my seat. It had been a long time since I had sat at the dining table like this. I was seated facing Dalton and he waved at me while smiling. I waved back, but as I did he turned his head toward the end of the table. I turned my head as well and saw my father speaking. 

As I couldn’t understand what he was saying, I just played along and tried to react like the rest of the family.

Every member of the family spoke one after the other at my father’s request and eventually he turned toward me, but, unsure what was expected of me, I could only smile in response. 

He said something again and I could feel everyone staring at me. Cold sweat ran down my back. Even Darkie’s reassuring presence on laps wasn’t enough to calm me down.

What should I do?

I felt a hand on my back and looked up at Goldie who was now talking for me. 

My father looked up at her and nodded, satisfied.

After that, Father brought his head down and lifted his hands as he began reciting Grace to Meiriem. I also tried to give my thanks as best as I could, mumbling through it as well as I could as I didn’t want anyone to realise I had forgotten how to do my prayers. 

Once it ended, the servants served us our meal. The food I had received in my room had been mostly those made for sick people.

Finally being offered food with some consistency, I dug into my plate happily. I had been so engrossed in my meal that I was done before anyone else. I would have asked for seconds, but I was scared of causing trouble. 

Since no one was talking to me, I started playing with Darkie under the table.

[The food was good! Wasn’t it, Darkie?]

“It looked delicious! Do you think they will start bringing food like that to the room every day?”

[Maybe… That would be nice, but they might still think I’m sick... And  I am, am I not?]

“No way! You look very healthy!”

[You really think so?]

Goldie put her hand on my shoulder, making me jump. I looked up at her just in time to see her put a finger to her lips with a worried expression, but whatever it was she had wanted to warn me about, it was too late.

Confused, I looked around the table, but nothing looked out of place. It wasn’t until I raised my eyes to my family’s faces and looked at the servants staring at me that I realised they all wore the same horrified expressions. 

My father stood up from his chair, knocking over his glass of wine as he did and spilling it all over my mother’s dress. 

Neither even reacted to that as he began angrily shouting something at Goldie and then at me. I looked around at my siblings and Mother but they all looked down, refusing to meet my eyes.

[What’s going o… ] I tried to ask, but he started screaming again. 

I felt a ball grow in my throat. 

Why is Father acting like that? What did I do wrong? Is he angry that I was playing at the table?

My father yelped something else at Goldie. 

She gave a quick bow and picked me up from my seat. 

I held Darkie with all my strength as all the eyes in the room pierced daggers into me as we left. 

I felt my eyes swell, but I tried to hold back my tears. I looked back as we crossed the door threshold. I could see my father glaring from the corner of his eye as he said something to Mother, as she silently nodded back to him. 

The doors closed behind us, and Goldie carried me in her arms. The hallways looked bleak and empty under the moonlight as we quickly traversed them.

As Goldie tucked me in with shaking hands, she couldn’t even muster her typical collected smile.