Who Made the Lamb (1/3)
Added 2025-03-27 01:00:08 +0000 UTCHere's the complete first draft of part one (of
Comments
Hey, thanks for commenting, very much appreciated. It's true, it's hardly a new idea, but hopefully I'm able to give it a bit of a different spin. That's why starting with the photo of the dad opened the story up for me, I wanted to focus on that relationship and the influence of the parent on the siblings. I'm also hoping to make the story--well, realistic is a bit of a stretch, considering the premise, but as realistic as is feasible. No sci-fi prosthetics or super-serums. Hopefully, it holds readers' interest!
David Sanders
2025-03-30 19:41:45 +0000 UTCThe idea of feminizing to take a job is certainly not new, but you've built some very believable characters here with real concerns. I'm looking forward to the rest of the story.
OldHiker
2025-03-30 15:28:48 +0000 UTCThanks for the feedback, it's very much appreciated. It is tonally very different, isn't it? That's been fun to try out. It came out gentler than originally intended - the sister was originally meant to be a lot harsher on the brother, the brother more of a sexist jerk - but they didn't turn out that way in writing. It's something I might fine tune a bit in a final edit, but it's been enjoyable writing characters who aren't absolute bastards. I was trying for something a bit more realistic with this one--as realistic as the basic premise allows, anyway--hopefully it's convincing for the reader.
David Sanders
2025-03-28 06:23:40 +0000 UTCVery different feel to Constant. A lot more gentle and honest. Frankly that's never been my thing genre wise, but that said I'm griped none the less. It's very well written with brother and sister coming off as very believable and real. Looking forward to reading the rest.
Julia
2025-03-28 04:37:58 +0000 UTC
