LVII

My Christmas List: December 24th
Please let Miracle's surgery go smoothly. 

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ARMANI'S POV

After being practically forced to change and take a quick shower, I finally made it back down to the infirmary.

I can honestly say it was the worst shower of my life—peeling off the bloody clothes, scrubbing the blood that had seeped in through the white material off my body, and then trying to register the blood on my hands that was not only from Miracle but Diana too.

I felt absolutely numb for the first time in my life. My face was expressionless—I couldn't smile, better yet, frown if I wanted to. I was completely exhausted.

The world had actually stopped spinning—and if Miracle didn't make it through surgery, my world would never spin again.

I felt selfish for even showering and changing into clean clothes when Miracle was fighting for her life, but Dominico made a good point.

"You can't take care of her if you don't take care of yourself first."

The words rang in my head as I walked briskly down the infirmary halls. I had ditched my heels and pantsuit—now I was in a black t-shirt and sweatpants with soft black Dior slippers on my feet.

I felt comfortable—too comfortable.

In fact, I wanted to be the one fighting for my life instead of her—and if it magically got offered to me, I wouldn't hesitate to trade places with Miracle.

My walking slowed as I approached the waiting area that had grown with people.

Everyone was seated in complete silence, and I took in every single face that was present.

Lining the halls were my parents, Cecilia, Leonardo, Olivia, Emilia, Dominico, and even Idalia.

I don't know how Olivia got down here, but I could only assume she witnessed the entire scene and insisted to come wait for news—I could only imagine the questions she has about this place and honestly, I wouldn't even mind answering them. She's Miracle's closest friend, so at some point, she'd have to be cued into what I do for a living.

I walked closer to the group—I had never actually heard a place be this silent before.

As if on cue, everyone's eyes drifted over to me, and as if on cue again, their faces morphed into a pitied look.

However, Idalia seemed to be different—instead, she jumped to her feet, ran over to me, and hugged my legs.

I stared forward, blinking a few times as I rubbed her back. Something I would always do to Miracle—

I pushed the thought away, knowing it would dig up awful emotions with it.

Idalia looked up at me, "She's going to be okay zia."

I pursed my lips into a thin line, pushing away the dreadful feeling of my heart lurching in my chest. It was one of the most painful things I had experienced, and that really said something.

"Yeah," I whispered, my voice barely audible given how badly I had screamed crying earlier, "I'm sure she will," I said, forcing a smile, but the statement itself felt like a lie—like a rehearsal of some sort.

Emilia stood from her chair, walked over to us, and guided Idalia away from me. "I'm sorry, I tried to get her to sleep, but she..." Emilia trailed off, closing her eyes for a brief moment. "She saw the entire thing with Miracle happen, and she kept crying, insisting I bring her down here. It felt unfair of me not to, so I did," she said, and even Emilia looked like something had broken inside of her.

I felt my heart shatter in my chest—hating that Idalia witnessed such a sight at a young age, especially of someone she loved and cared for.

I genuinely hope this isn't traumatizing for her.

I shook my head, "It's okay, she can be down here," I said, forcing yet another small smile as I looked down at Idalia, who quickly reciprocated it.

At least, she seems to be okay.

I hope I can say the same for Miracle.

I walked closer to the group, trailing behind Emilia and Idalia.

"Do you want to take a seat?" My mother asked,
motioning to the seat beside her, but I only shook my head.

"No, I'm fine," I said, crossing my arms over my chest.

My father let out a concerned sigh, "I'm sure it will all be okay."

Will it?

I nodded, "Yeah," I said, but it somehow came out as a question.

Before my father could say anything else, footsteps could be heard from down the hall, easily making my heart race and my ears perk up.

This is it.

Suddenly, my body was trembling and I felt nauseous. All I could think was, please let her be okay. Please let her be alive.

Everyone stood from their chairs as the doctor stopped in front of me, and I could read his face almost immediately.

His expression wasn't holding sorrow—instead, he was smiling slightly.

"Oh thank God," I breathed out, feeling tears prick at the corners of my eyes as I pressed my palms to my mouth. "Thank God," I said again, closing my eyes for a brief moment.

"The surgery went as well as expected, Ms. Cadieux has not woken up yet, but that's not abnormal," he said, patting my shoulder as I took a few deep breaths in and out. "As of right now, one person can be in her room until she wakes up."

It was insane how quickly my life changed within a matter of seconds. News like that easily breathed air back into my lungs, giving me more life than I ever had before. Suddenly the entire course of my life was back on track. That's how much power she held.

"We're just so happy to hear she's okay," My mother said, her tone relieved and emotional.

My father nodded in agreement, "Yeah, we can all come back in the morning."

"And I can get you settled in a room," My mother said, addressing Olivia, who nodded gratefully.

"That would be great," Olivia said, wiping away her stray tears.

I noticed Cecilia hugging Leonardo who later pulled Olivia into the hug.

"Honestly I think this calls for a group hug," Dominico declared, smiling as he guided us all into a giant hug—even the doctor, who let out a laugh as he joined us.

I felt my lips twitch upward slightly—finally smiling after what felt like so long.

If this is how only a few hours felt without Miracle by my side, I absolutely could not imagine a lifetime. Now that sounds like some personalized Hell dedicated to me.

Everyone gathered into the hug, wrapping their arms around one another as Idalia and I stood in the middle of it.

After a few moments of basking in the news, we pulled away, and moments after pulling away, everyone said their goodbyes to me for the night. My family specifically made sure to pull me into their own separate hugs, telling me they love me before they all left as well.

"So I can see her when she wakes up?" I heard Idalia's small voice question as she walked down the corridors in between Dominico and Emilia.

Emilia laughed softly, "Of course, you can."

I couldn't help but smile—something in the air felt drastically different, and I felt incredibly grateful for it.

"Ready boss?" The doctor asked, which almost immediately earned a nod from me.

"Far past ready honestly," I said, following behind him as he led me to her room.

As soon as he opened the door and I entered the dim room, the beeping of the heart rate monitor filled my ears—and I felt the need to thank God that her heart was even beating.

"I'll leave you to it—please let me or the nurses know if you need anything," he said, and as soon as I gave a nod of approval, he backed out of the room, closing the door gently behind him.

I walked over to her bed, looking down at her like she was some figment of my imagination. Scared that she would randomly disappear at any moment. I'm clearly still processing the fact that she's actually here and breathing.

I smiled as I looked down at her beautiful face. She looked so angelic—so peaceful.

Her dark black hair was spilling out onto the fluffy white pillow while her dark brows and plump lips were completely relaxed. She looked so comfortable, and I loved even the near sight of that.

I smiled as I took in her calm breaths, appreciating that they were even present.

It felt like I had taken so much for granted before—suddenly I was grateful for even the small things, like her heartbeat or the fact that she was even breathing. Especially since it was something I had prayed for over and over again within the last few hours.

After a moment of contemplation, I slid off my furry black slippers, slowly climbing onto the large hospital bed and crawling under the warm covers. Carefully, I laid my head on her chest, desperate to just hear her heartbeat in her chest.

I let out a breath of relief, staring at the black wall with heavy eyes. I finally felt tired—like I could fall asleep, especially now that I was in her arms.

My eyes darted over to the clock when it let out a soft ding, signaling that it was twelve o'clock in the morning and the next day.

I yawned, my eyes fluttering shut as I said, "Merry Christmas, Miracle."

❆Authors Note❆
I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter, let me know you're thoughts. I can't wait to see you all next chapter, I love u all so so much & thank you for the support<3

-Weekendlustt