Live Premiere - Why Does Britain Still Have A Queen?

Americans want to fuck the flag. I've actually thought a lot about why the United States is the way it is. Looking at it objectively, the office of president creates more problems than it solves and isn't elected by popular vote, so why not just get rid of the office altogether, and just have congress appoint the department heads directly? But try suggesting that to anyone living in the U.S., and people will look at you like you're out of your mind. Or suggest dissolving the federal government and just having each state be its own nation, and people act like you just suggested total anarchy. I used to think this was some form of partisan ego. "We can't get rid of the office of president. We need to keep the office to that next election MY party can win, and I get to rub it in the face of anyone who voted for the other party." But then I thought, it probably goes deeper than that. I think Americans want to fuck the flag. Keep all fifty states, and thus, the exact same number of stars in the corner that we've gotten comfortably used to seeing. Keep the outline of the map the same, with all the state lines exactly where we remember them (even though, technically, the state maps are wrong, because they don't show Native American reservations or federally-owned lands, but I digress). And we like things on the national picture to be more or less the same as they have been from time immemorial, and by "time immemorial," I of course mean the invention of television. And because we've been raised with this moral value of what it means to "be an American," which is another way of saying, "We stand for (insert your own definition of goodness here), and by association the flag stands for (whatever you said) as well." We've been told from childhood that the government is "of the people, by the people, for the people," and everyone one of us knows that that's bullshit, because all we ever do is talk shit about "those assholes in Washington DC," who buy houses in districts to which they have no personal connection, get elected, and then move to DC to live and work in buildings modeled after the Roman Empire.... and yet, the idea of tearing it all down, for some reason, just doesn't seem kosher. Maybe it's the 2,340 times we were forced to recite the Pledge of Allegiance before school, or maybe it's the way media always insinuates that anyone who doesn't support the government is just a loyal supporter of the party not currently in power, or maybe it's the way the media conflates disrespect for the nation with disrespecting veterans. But mostly, I think Americans just have a weird infatuation with an abstract symbol, a colorful 2-D image that is the people's collective waifu, i.e. the flag. Great video, by the way, and you look very natural as a prince on a horse.

Shawn Ravenfire