SD5 Harem Prologue

Pinky Peach sat down at her gaming chair and let her tail spill out the side. She turned on her camera and with a few clicks was staring into the faces of all the other Dream Girls. They looked back at her expectantly from her computer monitor. Even Eppy was there, using Brock’s computer. Pinky smirked with amusement as she noticed Spinella’s elbow was rubbing against the elf’s, and the spider legs on the arachne’s back wiggled with anxiety.

“Alright, girls! Donuts?!”

“Check!” they all cried out, holding up their unhealthy breakfasts.

“Lattes?!”

“Check!” All the girls raised up their drinks except for Blossom, who had a pitcher of nutrient-enriched water on her desk.

“High speed connections?”

“Actually, there’s too many of us.” Tahini adjusted her glasses and stared directly into her camera. “We need to upgrade our connection. Our network can’t support this many of us gaming at the same time.”

Pinky’s lip jutted out in a frowny pout. “B-but we have to train! And we already have the fastest internet available in our neighborhood!”

Mamba chuckled and adjusted the cat-ear headphones she was wearing. They were cute, but Pinky remembered Mamba saying the sound quality was awful. She only kept them because Tahini hated them so much. “Peachy Keen, I told you we can just get a second or even a third network in our house.”

The unicorn girl shook her head stubbornly for a moment, but it ultimately blended into a slow nod. “Latency is important,” she noted. “Even more important than money.”

Blossom yawned aggressively loudly. “I’m already fuggin’ bored. Either we play or someone gets their titties out.”

“Hmm. How about this—” Pinky rolled back in her chair and prepared to stand. “Mamba, honey, I’ll make you the host of this call, and Satina and I can sit this one out so that Eppy and Spinella can play in the group game instead of 1v1s on their own.”

Mamba nodded as the little crown icon appeared over her name. “Done. Alright, ladies, you heard the pregnant pony-girl. I’m sending you party invites now.”

Satina whimpered. “Why am I sitting out?”

“Someone has to, and I think you’ll be distracted by your donuts for the duration of at least the first match,” Pinky explained.

The busty satyress bobbed her head from one side to the other as she considered the logic. “Ohh, I see. Yes, I can accept this reasoning. Gosh, Pinky, you make a good point.”

“That’s why she’s the leader,” Tahini chuckled.

“What?!” Blossom blurted out in shock. “I thought I was the leader!”

Hephi slid into frame, taking Pinky’s seat as the unicorn girl stood up. “I’ll observe from here, then, Pinky Peach,” she offered, though it was more of a declaration than a suggestion.

Pinky nodded anyway, her eyes drifting jealously to Hephi’s new digital tablet. It even had a clipboard clip and everything. “Suit yourself, but turn off the camera. Every bit of ping we can avoid counts.”

The Werifesterian elfmaid nodded her stern agreement to that and clicked off the camera with a tap of her stylus on its power button. Pinky’s lip snarled as she observed the sexy digital writing implement being used so frivolously.

“I would treat you better,” she grumbled as she turned her back and walked out of the room.

Pinky Peach planned to go room to room to check on the girls. In truth, this change was for the best. Now that Pinky and Satina were sitting out, Eppy and Spinella could slip out of 1v1s and join the 5on5 ranked match that the other girls were getting ready to play.

This was a training session, though. As such, the girls were all using Squirf accounts—low level accounts that weren’t tied to the usernames they were known for and wouldn’t affect their overall ranking. They used Squirf accounts to practice and train off-stream. It was a common tactic among the Loremasters super-elites.

Pinky Peach went into the flower sprite’s bedroom first, as it was closest to her own. Her face twisted up when she looked at the screen. “DeflowerMeBrocky is not the most subtle username for your Squirf, Blossom,” Pinky noted as she bent down to see the flower sprite’s screen.

Blossom cackled like a little gremlin as she joined the game lobby, apparently deciding to ignore Pinky Peach entirely. “I’m locked in, Mamba. May Jesus Christ have mercy on our enemies.”

“Brock hates when you say that,” Tahini reminded her through Blossom’s tinny headphones, just loud enough for Pinky to hear.

“He loves it,” Blossom grunted back. “And I can’t really fuggin’ help it. Just try it: Jesus Christ!”

“Jesus Christ!” Spinella squeaked. “Wow, you’re right—that is satisfying.”

Eppy chimed in next, right as Pinky left Blossom’s room and headed into the living room. “I’m in, bitches. I’m instalocking Grulnor the second the countdown starts. Ban Maltra—she’s broken after the latest patch, and none of us play her.”

Pinky beamed with pride to hear Eppy speak Loremasters jargon so fluently. “I raised that girl,” Pinky sighed. “That’s my baby girl.”

Eppy had been there in Pinky’s head and body the entire time when Pinky Peach had learned the game and practiced it day after day. When Eppy got separated from Pinky’s body, Pinky found that the elven princess actually managed to retain about ninety percent of Pinky’s own knowledge and skills, making her one of the best girls on the team and a great option for substitutes or swaps for online games. Because of how Pinky felt about letting Eppy out of the house and the logistical challenges relating to it, however, Eppy would likely not be doing any actual physical events anytime soon.

Plus, the one time they tried taking her out of the house, Eppy drew a knife on a cashier for looking at Brock.

Pinky Peach stood behind the couch, looking down at Eppy and Spinella’s screens over their heads. Eppy and Spinella were sitting shoulder to shoulder, using laptops so they could game together. There was a ton of space left over on the couch on either side of them, too.

She didn’t understand just how or why the two of them got so close so quickly. She got glimpses of Eppy’s thoughts about the arachne girl whenever Eppy had to slip back inside Pinky’s head for a day trip, and one time Pinky found herself with the strong urge to hold Spinella’s hand when they all went out to eat. It was like Eppy had latched onto the new girl, maybe feeling a bit on the outside of things herself.

For that matter, Pinky sometimes wondered how Hephi was faring. With Eppy and Spinella partnering up, and the rest of the Dreamgirls already having their own clique, Hephi was the only one truly on the outside. It was fitting in a sense because she was not one of the Dreamgirls, but she was starting to feel like a part of the family anyway.

Pinky could tell that Hephi had come to care for the girls in her own way since joining. She fretted over their schedules, counted their calories for them, always made sure they were taken care of in the few moments when Brock wasn’t around—like right now. She had started to feel a bit like a mommy figure, which Pinky didn’t know she was missing until Hephi came along.

The game started up, and right away, Mamba slipped naturally into the role of leader that Pinky usually held. “Alright, Spinny, you’re our carry, right?”

“Yeah.”

“Then head straight to mid and I’ll support you from the jungle. Blossom, I see you laning with Tahini, but I think I need you to support Eppy since she picked a squishy champ.”

“Got it, snake boobs.”

“This donut is so good. Was this from our Darkling?” Satina asked, her mouth obviously full.

Pinky giggled and leaned in slightly so that Eppy’s mic would pick up her voice. “No, Brock has been solarporting across town to a distant Darkling Donuts ever since we got banned from the neighborhood one.”

“That still really pisses me off,” Satina muttered.

“If Darkling Donuts would stop hiring breedable hotties, then it wouldn’t have been a problem,” Blossom growled.

Spinella giggled. “Wow, I—I guess that means you think I’m breedable enough for Brock, Blossom?”

Blossom went silent for a moment. “Let me bop your perky little boobies a bit and I’ll answer that question.”

“No thanks.”

“Your loss.”

Pinky Peach observed patiently, opting to stay with the new girls since she was most curious about them. It wasn’t that either of them were new to the game or lacked competency in it. In terms of raw skill, the two of them were probably the best on the current team. She was more curious about watching the way they interacted with their teammates.

“Uhhh—I could…if anyone has a second…maybe it would be nice if—”

“Spit it out, Spinny,” Mamba barked, growing impatient with the arachne’s bashfulness.

“I—I—It’s just that the other team has three on mid against me right now. I could use some backup.”

“I’ll set up a gank in the bushes. Kite them to our tower and I’ll pop in behind them,” Mamba said. “Blossom, you’re close. You come in and heal Spinella so she can feel secure in using her ult.”

“On it.”

Pinky watched Spinella’s eight eyes go wide over the next couple of minutes. Spinella had cut her teeth on solo queue, so she didn’t have much experience working with a team like this. The poor girl seemed to be afraid to even communicate with the others. But when Blossom and Mamba rushed in, just as they said they would, she appeared entirely stunned.

Mamba’s champion stealthed in the bushes, waiting for Spinella and their tower to push the enemy back. In order for her to be able to do that, she needed a bit more health to be able to get in range and take the risk. Blossom ran straight up to her and unloaded her heals before returning to base, leaving Spinella in just the right position.

Spinella rushed the enemy and activated her champion’s ultimate ability—a shockwave that pushed enemies backward and dealt a bit of damage, stunning them for two seconds.

That was just enough time for Mamba to leap out of the bushes and spam all her attack abilities at once—a nuke, as the terminology went.

Within seconds, it had gone from 3-on-1 to 2-on-0, from the enemy’s favor to theirs. “Nice job, Spinny!” Mamba hissed excitedly, and Pinky could see her snake tail dancing behind her on her webcam screen.

“Great work, ladies! Now push! Push as far as you can while three of them are on cooldown! Mamba and Spinella, you’re both in mid, so take advantage of that and get rid of a tower or two!”

“You read my mind, Peachy Keen,” Mamba giggled. “Fucking backseat gamer.”

Pinky Peach watched with satisfaction, her horsetail flicking excitedly as each lane took out one more tower, putting the advantage squarely in the Dreamgirls’ favor. “Perfect!” Blossom squealed. “Hang on, I’m going on global chat.”

“Blossom, please don’t—”

“Hey, you fuggin’ losers! I bet you wanna uninstall the game after that shit, don’t ya! Do it! I dare you, or I’ll squash you with my rooty little feet!”

“Uhh…umm…” There was suddenly an anxious male voice coming from the enemy side. “Is this…Blossom? From the Dreamgirls?”

Blossom’s jaw dropped, which made Pinky have to cover her mouth to avoid laughing. “Umm. Maybe. Who’s asking?”

“Oh my fucking gods, it’s fucking Blossom from the Dreamgirls, dude! Yo! I’m fucking serious! Get over here! Yo, everyone stop! Stop! Blossom just told me to uninstall!”

“You lucky son of a bitch,” another one grunted. “Fuck you, dude.”

“Dude, she fucking said she’d step on me.”

“Screw you, asshole,” the friend muttered. “Wait—if that’s Blossom—is Pinky Peach in there?”

Pinky laughed and pressed her cheek up against Eppy’s to speak into the elf’s headset. “Hi! Are you a fan?”

“Holy shit. Holy fucking shit. Holy motherfucking cocksucking shit. What the actual fuck—Pinky Peach?! Is this a scam? Are we being conned?!”

“Dude! We’re playing against the Dreamgirls!”

While this conversation was going on, the enemy team had entirely stopped playing the match. They were all essentially AFKing in base, standing around and doing nothing except for gushing about how they were such big fans.

Meanwhile, the Dreamgirls continued to play, pushing into their base, a few short minutes away from ending the match prematurely.

“Umm—would you boys mind playing the game?” Mamba asked. “This is supposed to be a training match for us and it got way too easy when you stopped…moving.”

“By the Crimson Light, is that Mamba?! Yo, are Satina and Tahini there?!”

“I’m eating donuts,” Satina chimed in. “I’m sitting this one out. It’s our substitute covering for me.”

“QueenOfTheWeb is here too, dude! That cute arachne chick in that bikini photo!”

Another member of the team chimed in, making things even worse. “Hey! QueenOfTheWeb! Do you have an OnlyFantasies account?!”

Spinella shot Pinky an angry look at the mention of that photograph. It was the only picture Pinky Peach had of the arachne girl when they had to register her for the charity event that she subbed for Pinky in. Pinky did feel bad about it, but on the plus side, it did get Spinella a lot more followers—though maybe they weren’t all the sorts of followers she was hoping for.

“Ignore them, girls,” Mamba said, slipping back into party-only chat. “Let’s finish this match and start another up.”

They did just that, destroying the enemy’s crystal nexus mere seconds later. They all ignored the onslaught of friend requests that came from their opponents, but they sent polite messages back, thanking them for a fun game.

Blossom stared into the camera, her inky black eyes wide and shining. “We have a superpower!” she gasped.

“Alright, let’s join another queue,” Mamba said.

“No, Mamba, wait! Listen to me! We are so hot that people will throw a ranked game just to take a minute to talk to us!”

Tahini laughed into her microphone. “That’s one way of interpreting it.”

“Lemme cook, kitty-titty,” Blossom said, still glaring directly into the camera. “What if this was our strategy going forward?”

“No,” Pinky grunted immediately. “First of all—there’s no glory in winning a competitive esport match just because we have fans. Second of all, if you get too dependent on winning like that, we’ll be weak when we reach ranked matches with players that really care about winning. The top 200 players don’t give a fuck who we are, Blossom. They just want to win.”

Blossom frowned but nodded her head in understanding. “Okay. Fair point. I retract my suggestion.”

“We can keep it in our back pocket,” Mamba giggled. “If a random game is going badly, we can always—”

“No,” Pinky said.

“Relax, Peachy Keen, I’m only joking.”

“Well, I’m not,” Pinky countered. “I didn’t work as hard as I did to be a top player only to win simply because people are starstruck around me. There’s no honor in that.”

Tahini took a sip from her latte. “I agree. If we’re going to play, we should play honestly. If we use dirty tricks, people will figure it out eventually. Do you want that associated with your name, Blossom?”

The flower sprite shook her head, her vines flailing wildly. “No. I just want pots, Brock, and titties associated with my name.”

“Well, you’re two thirds of the way there,” Eppy commented.

Pinky swatted the back of Eppy’s head the second Blossom’s lip jutted out to pout. “That was mean,” the plant girl whimpered.

Spinella sighed suddenly and slouched in her seat on the couch. Pinky turned her attention to her in response. “So, Spinella—how was that for you? Having a team behind you?”

“It was…kinda nice,” she admitted. “I could get used to it, b-but…I’m still really nervous.” Her spider legs drew in tighter behind her back, betraying the severe degree of her shyness.

“No need to be nervous, Spinny,” Mamba said. “You did great. You definitely carried your weight.”

“She’s pretty light,” Blossom noted. “Doesn’t take much.”

Just then, though, the door to Tahini’s room opened, and everyone squinted to see what was going on. It was Brock, who had apparently solarported into the house without anyone even noticing. “Hey, Tahini,” he said, waving. “You busy?”

“Huh? We’re training, babe,” Tahini replied. “What’s up?”

“I just got a call from the post office and rushed home to tell you. They’re finally releasing your computer parts. Did you want to go with me to pick them up?”

Tahini shot out of her chair and threw on her jacket so fast that even Brock seemed stunned.

“Don’t forget to turn off your camera and leave the call, Tahini, sweety!” Satina called out.

“Oh, right! Yeah, I’ll be going, girls. Satina, are you done with your donuts?”

“Yep, just finished. I’ll take over for you in the next match. Good luck!”

“Good luck, Tahini!” Pinky shouted too.

“I have no idea what we’re talking about!” Blossom chimed in using the same tone. “Brocky, before you go, do you wanna give me some kisses and see how damp it makes me for you?”

Brock blinked into the camera and glanced over at the catgirl. “I mean—we’re not in a super big hurry—”

“No,” Tahini muttered.

Brock let out a defeated sigh. “In a bit, babe. See you all soon.”