Gandalf (TLDP Chap 30)
Added 2025-03-20 22:03:29 +0000 UTCGame
Thoughts
“Talking”
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“Thanks, Naruto! Or, Naruto-chan? Is that how the youngsters say it?” The burly biker man in front of Naruto asked, scratching his chin, “You gotta help me get hip with the youngin’s again, man! You should have seen what they posted about me on Devtter the other day!”
“What’d they say?” Naruto asked Great Red lazily, waving for the man to step to the side as he spoke so Naruto could continue signing autographs.
“This bastard called me a ‘fat balding super old guy who peaked in high school!’ Can you believe that, Naruto?! I’m still cool, right?!” Great Red asked, slamming his hands down on Naruto’s signing table and causing the pile of signed manga sitting on it to tumble over.
“They’re not wrong,” Kuroka hummed, sitting in a chair next to Naruto, “The whole ‘badass biker guy’ craze died down a decade ago, and you're definitely going bald.”
“I’m a dragon! Do you know how hard it is to grow hair?! Very hard!” Great Red huffed, reaching up to his head self-consciously. He hovered his hand over it, his palm glowing, and the mid-length hair on his head suddenly lengthed, reaching past his shoulders - though notably there was still a shiny bald spot on the back of his head.
“Did I fix it?” Great Red asked, looking down at Naruto with a toothy grin.
“...Totally,” Naruto said dryly, not wanting to bother with trying to help the dragon grow his hair out, “Why do you care what some devil said anyway? You’re, like, the strongest guy in the whole universe, right?”
“No matter how powerful I am, words still hurt,” Great Red huffed, glancing away, “I would go beat the hell out of that bastard who posted it, but…”
“But?” Naruto raised an eyebrow at him.
“It was her!” Great Red shouted dramatically, pointing his finger past Naruto, and Kuroka, to Shirone who was lazily eating a cookie in the chair next to her sister.
“It’s not my fault you're balding,” Shirone said unapologetically, smirking mischievously at him as she stuck out her tongue at him.
“You…” Great Red clenched his fists, actually looking like an old man as he glared at the petite catgirl, “If it wasn’t for Naruto, I’d rip all that hair off your head! Let’s see how you like being bald!”
“I wouldn’t be as cute if I was bald,” Shirone stuck her tongue out at him again, “So Naru-chan won’t let you!”
“If you try, you’re banned again,” Naruto nodded sagely, agreeing that Shirone’s cuteness levels would drop if she was bald.
“Damn brat,” Great Red huffed, walking around the table and sitting down gruffly as he started to reread the signed manga.
“Ho, you young ones are so energetic these days, huh?” Naruto turned his head as an old man walked along the side of the long line, approaching him.
“...I take it back,” Shirone whisper-shouted to Great Red, peeking around Naruto’s back, “You’re just an old guy. He’s a super old guy!”
“Ah… I can hear you, young one,” The smile on the old man's face stiffened, “I think I look rather youthful for my age!”
“Just because you’re about to die doesn’t mean you can skip the line, gramps,” Naruto said bluntly, gesturing at the line the old man was blatantly skipping, “Wait your turn like everyone else.”
“Haha, such a comedic youngin,” The old man chuckled stiffly, leaning forward as he placed a manga on the table in front of Naruto, “Do you know who I am, Youkai-boy?”
Naruto glanced up at him, pausing for a moment.
Do I know this grandpa?
Naruto stared at him, taking in the man's long white-gray beard, even longer gray hair, and glass monocle covering one of his eyes. He was in a rather elaborate long blue-white robe, and had a circular crown sitting on his head. He was also holding a large staff that was radiating a powerful aura.
...
Naruto stared at the old man.
…
The old man stared back.
…
I have no idea who this guy is.
“Merlin?” Naruto asked dumbly, answering with the only old bearded wizard he could think of.
“N-No, I am not Merlin,” The man answered back stiffly, and Naruto guessed again before he could explain further.
“Gandalf!” Naruto shot upward excitedly, pointing at the old man dramatically, “Oh, man! Rias showed me that movie you were in, but I thought it was just a movie! I didn’t know it was based on real events!”
I guess when pretty much everything supernatural is real, it makes sense that the movie was real too!
“I-It is just a movie,” The old man chuckled nervously, “I am not Gandalf. I am Odin!”
Naruto stared at him blankly. The old man nervously stared back.
“...Never heard of ya,” Naruto sat down, a disappointed look on his face, “Would’ve been way cooler if you were Gandalf.”
“W-What? Young god, I am ODIN! The all father?” Odin asked, desperately trying to get Naruto to recognize just who he really was, “The Norse god? Father of Thor and Loki? Killer of Giants? Slayer of Dragons?”
Naruto stared at him blankly, “Doesn’t ring a bell, and Yasaka told me about all the important people. Sorry, grandpa, but you gotta get back in line.”
“W-Wait! I’m also in movies!” Odin justified, “The Devengers! You surely have seen them, right?”
Naruto blinked, his eyes widening in excitement again, “Oh, I knew it! I saw you in Lord of the Devrings: Devengers Devsemble! Rias loves those movies!”
“Ah, no, you’re mixing up two different movies,” Odin tried to explain, but Naruto didn’t listen.
“I knew you were Gandalf,” Naruto grinned, reaching up and taking the manga to sign, “You should’ve just said from the start that you were!”
“I’m really not!” Odin said hastily, but Naruto just shook his head.
“I get it, man, you must get swarmed by fans all the time so you’re trying to lay low. I have the same problem,” Naruto nodded sagely, “But, you can be honest with me! You’re Gandalf!”
Persuasion Check
[Rolling…]
[God’s Luck] has added +20 to your roll!!
20!
Check success!
Naruto blinked, staring at the notification as he paused mid-autograph.
What am I persuading him about? Is he really not Gandalf?
Naruto’s face fell as he realized that the old man was, in fact, just a random guy named Odin - and not Gandalf.
“Ho! You caught me, Youkai-boy,” Odi-Gandalf nodded wisely, “I am indeed Gandalf the Gray!”
“Ok, I get it now,” Naruto muttered, sliding the manga back towards him as it was only mid-signature, “You really aren’t Gandalf, so… get back in line, gramps.”
“Huh? What do you mean?” Gandalf asked dumbly, raising an eyebrow at Naruto, “Why would I not be Gandalf?”
Damn it, I made this random old man think he’s actually Gandalf!
“O-Odin-sama, can you ask him to sign mine too?” A gorgeous silver-haired woman, who had been standing attentively a few steps behind Gandalf, asked shyly.
“Odin? Rossweisse, is that a nickname for me perhaps?” Gandalf asked, glancing over his shoulder at Rossweisse, “You should save that for your husband, virgin girl. Youkai-boy, can you believe that my attendant here is so old and yet is still a virgin? She’s yet to even have a boyfriend!”
“O-Odin-sama! D-Don’t embarrass me in front of the Youkai God!” Rossweisse huffed, blushing as she glanced at Naruto, “Y-Youkai God-sama, p-please ignore him! I’m definitely not a virgin, and I’ve had a ton of boyfriends! I-I’m super experienced!”
Naruto stared at her blandly.
If she had to make a persuasion check, she just failed it.
“Seriously, virgin girl? What is this silly nickname you keep trying to give me?” Gandalf chuckled, “‘Odin?’ What a ridiculous name!”
“O-Odin-sama? That’s your name!” Rossweisse asked confusedly.
“What do you mean, virgin girl? Has all that virgin-ness gone to your brain?” Gandalf asked, “My name is Gandalf!”
“W-What?” Rossweisse asked confusedly.
“Look, Odin, Gandalf, whatever the hell your name is,” Naruto jutted out the manga at Gandalf, “You gotta go wait in line just like everyone else. You don’t get special privileges just for being a wizard.”
“Hmm…” Gandalf hummed, stroking his long white beard as he thought, “What if I were your father?”
Naruto stared at him blankly.
“...What?”
“Marry this virgin girl,” Gandalf shoved Rossweisse forward, causing the girl to panic and blush as Naruto’s attention was on her, “She’s not my daughter, but with how much effort I’ve put into finding her a boyfriend, she might as well be!”
“O-Odin-sama! You can’t just!” Rossweisse stuttered out, not finishing her sentence as she panickedly looked at Naruto, “I-I’m sorry about this, Youkai God-sama! P-Please ignore this geezer!”
“Rossweisse, I absolutely need this autograph! Put that useless virgin body of yours to use for once!” Gandalf grinned at Naruto, “Come on, Youkai-boy! It would be an honor to marry the great Gandalf the Gray’s Valkyrie, would it not?”
“Sorry, gramps, but I’ve already got enough women to deal with,” Naruto denied easily, waving him off, “I don’t have time for another.”
“Yeah! Naruto-chan barely has enough to fuck my brains out as it is!” Kuroka nodded in agreement, causing Naruto to blush at her words, “No more wives! Nope!”
“Eh? When did Odin get here?” Great Red asked, glancing up from his manga and looking at Odin, “You got some nerve showing yourself in front of me, punk! You still owe me a beer!”
“Ah, Great Red,” Gandalf nodded at him in greeting, “Perhaps this ‘Odin’ owes you a drink, but I am Gandalf.”
“Trying to change your name to get out of it, huh?” Great Red stood up in a huff, walking around the table and towering over Odin as he glared down at him, “You think I’m stupid or somethin’, punk?”
“If you’re calling the super old man ‘punk,’ then you must be super duper old,” Shirone chimed in helpfully, causing Great Red to stiffen in anger.
“Look what you did, punk! Now she’s calling me old again!” Great Red glared even harder, roughly grabbing Odin and dragging him away from the table, “I’m gonna teach you a lesson!”
“O-Odin-sama! W-What do I do?!” Rossweisse panicked, watching as Gandalf was being dragged away by Great Red. She nervously tensed, looking like she was ready for a fight to break out.
“Oh? I’m just getting acquainted with an old friend,” Gandalf waved her off as he was dragged away, looking decidedly unworried despite the situation, “Get accompanied with your new husband, virgin girl!”
“O-Odin-sama?! D-Don’t just leave me…” Rossweisse glanced at Naruto, blushed, and then looked away shyly.
“I’m not marrying her, gramps,” Naruto called out blandly as Gandalf was manhandled by Great Red.
“I’ll work out the details with Yasaka later, Youkai-boy! Don’t wait to take her virginity!” Gandalf yelled in response, giving Naruto a thumbs up as Great Red dragged him out the door, “She’s already been waiting long enough!”
Damn geezer, this is just the type of thing Yasaka would agree to!
Naruto groaned, already feeling exhausted as he realized there was no getting out of this. Once Yasaka was brought into the plan, there would be no escaping. His already full bed was about to become even more full.
Sona and Serafall just joined a few days ago too… I couldn’t even get a week to get used to them?!
“O-Odin-sama!” Rossweisse flushed again, glaring at the Norse god as the door closed behind him and he was out of sight. She turned back to Naruto, blushing deeply.
“S-So… um… c-can you sign this?” Rossweisse’s face was beet red as she held a manga out to Naruto, glancing away as she whispered the last part, “H-Hubby?”
“I’m not marrying you,” Naruto said bluntly, but grabbed the manga and signed his name on it.
“R-Right! Of course not! I-I’m way too young and spry to get married!” Rossweisse nodded sagely, “I-I mean, even though I’ve definitely had a ton of boyfriends, a young woman like me still needs to have many more before settling down!”
Young women don’t say ‘spry’
Naruto ignored her, simply sliding the manga back across the table to her.
“T-Thanks!” Rossweisse nodded gratefully, blushing as she glanced down shyly at the manga, “...H-Hubby…”
Yeah, I’m totally not getting out of this.
And so, the Youkai God found himself with another fiance - again.
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Naruto Uzumaki:
[Youkai God]
Lvl: 705
STR: 920
DEX: 900
CON: 650
INT: 320
WIS: 900
CHA: 999
LUK: 0 [x[Anicent Youkai King’s 999 multiplier!]
Skills: [Chess Mastery]
Perks: [Martial Arts], [You’re a Wizard, Naruto], [Ladies Man], [God’s Luck]
Debuffs: [Confusion], [Bad Timing]
Naruto Uzumaki is a Hero from another world, who has been reborn with the power of the Gamer system!
Thank you for reading!
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AN: A bit of a shorter chapter, but from now on I’m going to be updating this story multiple times a week, so the chapters will be a bit shorter. Not that much shorter - this one is only like 250 words less than the previous shortest chapter, and about a fourth shorter than an average chapter.