Mother

This one is a bit different, and way longer than I intended. But I hope you like it!

P.S. This was based on a real case. Google Duane Walters from the UK!

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As I watch my husband sleep, I again wonder if we’d made the right decision. For years, Shane and I tried to have a baby the “natural” way, but nothing happened. When we finally had the money to visit a fertility clinic, we learned Shane’s sperm count was very low, and my uterus was not capable of growing a baby. 

But even with that news, the doctor wasn’t done talking: “What I’m about to say will probably surprise the hell out of you, but you actually have a spare uterus in this marriage.”

Shane and I look at each other, confused. “I have two of them?” I asked.

“No,” the doctor replied. “But your husband has one.”

Shane was intersexed. Specifically, he had something called Persistent Mullerian Duct Syndrome (PMDS), which meant that, along with the usual bait and tackle, he also has a uterus, fallopian tubes, ovaries—everything! 

“Now, usually, these are underdeveloped and not functional. But, in your case, the ultrasound looks, well, normal… For a female, obviously. What I’m trying to say, Shane, is there’s a good chance you could carry a child to term, using your sperm and your wife’s egg.”

We went home in a state of shock. Shane felt like his identity had been upended overnight. I assured him he was still the man I married. “Would you say that even if I became the mother of our child?”

“Wait, you’re seriously thinking about that?”

“If it’s our only chance? Yeah. I’ll do anything to make a baby with you.”

I laughed nervously. “Technically, honey, you’d be making the baby.”

There was more conversation—aided by wine—but ultimately, we decided to give it a go. The doctor walked us through everything on our next appointment. Basically, Shane’s pregnancy would be normal except the last part. He didn’t have a birth canal, so the baby would be delivered by c-section.

“And, of course,” the doctor explained. “You’ll have to go on testosterone blockers, and estrogen and progesterone.”

“I’m sorry, what?” Shane said.

I guess he hadn’t realized the female body needs a very specific environment to create a baby. He agreed, figuring the physical changes would be minimal and easily reversible. They weren’t.

As the months passed, Shane’s body developed womanly curves almost as if he was going through a rebirth himself. Soon, “passing” as a man became impossible, and we called him “Shana” in public. He has also become extremely emotional, and although he claims he doesn’t regret his decision, I know he’s having second thoughts. He looks at himself in the mirror all the time, no doubt wondering if he can ever go back to living as a man.

I’m sure the answer is no. And the answer to his question from way back, about whether I’ll be able to see him as the “man” I’d married? Also no.

But that doesn’t mean I’ll love my wife any less.