Warhammer Noob Reacts to If the Emperor had a Text-to-Speech Device Episode 17
Added 2024-08-05 08:29:22 +0000 UTC
Comments
Yo, those funky monkeys mean business. Didn't know about them till this comment, but I think they're a fun inclusion to the universe xD.
Xero Degrees
2024-08-06 06:29:33 +0000 UTCThe Sensei used to be a thing in old lore, but they got retconned into being pasties for Tzeench because the writers wanted to take the lore in a different direction (and their very existence would be a major plot point). Torquemada Coteaz is one of the named characters that you can field as part of the Inquisition. Fyodor used to be one as well but he got taken out of production, lmao. Coteaz is also getting his model updated soon as part of the new Agents of the Imperium Codex, but people are a bit iffy about his new model compared to Coteaz' old iconic one. He's also the protagonist of the fanfilm The Lord Inquisitor. As for the funky monkeys, they are Jokaero. Originally a species designed by the Old Ones to maintain technology, the Jokaero are just Orangutans with some extra brain power. Because they are not sapient life they are not beholden to the BURN THE MUTANT/XENOS thing the Imperium is big on, and as such someone like an Inquisitor can have one around just fine. Ever heard about how a million monkeys on a million typewriters will inevitably produce Shakespeare? Well, each of the Jokaero is that millionth monkey, but instead of writing the Tempest they make a ring that shoots a laser beam that can bisect a tank. They produce what is known as Digital Weapons, called such because they are often rings worn on the fingers, IE digits. These can be horrifyingly powerful, and a Digital Weapon is a potent weapon for anyone wearing it. These things are vastly more potent than anything the Mechanicus can make on a similar scale, and they even surpass the Eldar in some areas. The reason they don't give everyone in the Imperial Guard what is essentially a Green Lantern power ring is that the Jokaero cannot really be controlled or coerced since they are animals, and they make things on a whim. So one ring they make might make for a nice flashlight the next one is a plasma cannon. Plus they are so adept at technology any prison you put them in is temporary at best. Now, back when they were introduced they were seen as an absolute meme unit (the Jokaero model is still on sale to this day), which they are. But they also have a frightening amount of firepower, some of which can casually vaporize tanks. So it became a joke to make an army consisting of Coteaz and a large blob of Jokaero. While it was kinda funny the army wasn't very viable because A: buying that many Jokaero is extremely expensive and B: once an even halfway decent melee unit gets into combat with the Jokaero it's GG for the laser Orangutans.
Beriorn
2024-08-05 09:46:59 +0000 UTC
