Divine Apostasy Book 5 - Chapter 7
Added 2021-05-01 06:29:52 +0000 UTCThis book is now published on KU. KU has rules requiring no more than 10% of a book be available by other means. Due to this restriction, I have removed this chapter.
If you wish to continue reading, please email me and I will send you the *.mobi file for you to add to your Amazon device.
I'm sorry if this inconveniences you in any way. I am only doing this so I can remain in the KU program.
Thanks for your understanding.
AFK
Comments
Thank you as always, Sweet! I appreciate your suggestions.
A. F. Kay
2021-06-28 04:29:49 +0000 UTCSuggestions: no sense of movement, Ruwen stood in the suddenly stood (?) now stood (?) A thin vein of quartz along the floor lit up like a rope to the distant wall. like a rope, reaching the distant wall (?) like rope, stretching all the way to the distant wall (?) Although it was probably better to get this hope behind him, so he could move forward with other solutions. his hope (?) Ruwen reached down to grab the vial. Unnecessary repeat. You have "took the vial" in the next paragraph and that flows better.
2021-06-24 20:31:22 +0000 UTCI've really come to enjoy it as well.
A. F. Kay
2021-05-10 21:20:02 +0000 UTCShe is such a great and complex person. I really love seeing what she does.
A. F. Kay
2021-05-10 21:19:48 +0000 UTCWow, how did I miss that as well. Thank you so much. My brain just fills those articles in. Dumb brain.
A. F. Kay
2021-05-10 21:18:39 +0000 UTCUsed bright, twice as well. Wow, how did I miss so much repetition? Thanks!
A. F. Kay
2021-05-10 21:17:26 +0000 UTCThank you! Great catch on both items!
A. F. Kay
2021-05-10 21:15:34 +0000 UTCIt is cheaper than therapy! haha.
A. F. Kay
2021-05-10 21:15:01 +0000 UTCAs far as the “serialized” writing style, I like it. It serves as a type of punctuation that indicates a shift in storyline, even when there isn’t a shift in scenery.
Robert Gunnlaugsson
2021-05-08 12:32:45 +0000 UTCOkay, this is a feel-good moment for me, “When I saw Fractal in your memories, I knew he was special. It led to this mentorship. In the last couple of weeks, Fractal has surprised me on multiple occasions. Me. He surprised, me.” “He surprised, me.” Boy, Blapy has to work hard to try and hide her soft side. Doesn’t she?
Robert Gunnlaugsson
2021-05-08 12:19:45 +0000 UTCMissing word(s): “A pulse of bright light hurdled down glowing line directly toward them.” I think there should be either “a” or “the” after “hurdled down”.
Robert Gunnlaugsson
2021-05-08 12:10:36 +0000 UTCI think it should be "hurtled" not "hurdled". Hurtle means to move very fast, hurdle relates to overcoming obstacles. Also, it might be better to spread out the usage - it was used twice in one paragraph which stood out to me.
Nick O'Roonling
2021-05-08 09:50:09 +0000 UTCHe enjoys torturing us...
Jeremiah Halstead
2021-05-08 08:54:42 +0000 UTCThis is something that has evolved for me. If you look at Shade's First Rule and compare it with The Fourth Secret you will see I have almost 30% more chapters. I agree that Patreon has changed my writing style to reflect a more web serial type feel. But that is because, like I said, I like this style.
A. F. Kay
2021-05-01 18:58:09 +0000 UTCIt is a preference thing. Some authors like 6k long chapters and will never break a scene up. I like shorter chapters. Not as short as thrillers, but shorter than maybe typical epic fantasy. Does this style bother you?
A. F. Kay
2021-05-01 18:57:18 +0000 UTCWhy does it feel like the chapters are written with where your are stopping in Patreon in mind?
MillionLittleE
2021-05-01 18:38:48 +0000 UTC
