My Classmate Emma Lindberg - Chapter 23, Page 6
Added 2023-01-22 08:00:04 +0000 UTC
Comments
I can agree with you on several points, though speaking as a novelist, I would say it would be difficult to compress the kind of story development seen in a novel to something of this media. I've read through this collection of chapters several times and find, when considered, there are signs of development to all sides. The inciting incident is with Emma turning 18 and deciding she wants to live life in her way. All the other characters have been living parallel and are now drawn into the weave as Emma takes Gabby. Even in a book of a 100k words there will always be a lot left to the reader to imply from hints and expectations. We do all have expectations, but this is enjoyable.
John
2023-01-23 01:38:25 +0000 UTCThe story is still erotic, but believability has gone out the window. Things moved way too fast, not allowing for the characters and their relationship dynamics to grow. I was interested in Cami being involved in some way, but going from "fuck you Emma" to "yes, mistress Emma" in a few pages is somewhat hard to digest. I'm not in the business of telling writers how their stories should develop and I don't like it when some people commonly do that. If I want a story to develop a certain way, I should it write it myself. I love reading what others write because I keep guessing and anticipating what's going to happen next. This is a good story with nice renders on top of it that make it more immersive. Maybe because the writing is shorter and focuses on specific scenes, it doesn't allow for more story elements to be incorporated? Regardless, keep going and tell your story. You can't make everyone love everything equally.
Red Blue
2023-01-22 16:48:58 +0000 UTCShe must be sweating, your tits off in the latex outfit hahaha 😝
InfiniteAntonym
2023-01-22 15:19:18 +0000 UTC
