NokiMo
Hamzah Al-Emad
Hamzah Al-Emad

patreon


102 - Cleaning Olympics

Foot lovers rejoice! Watch from an ominous angle as this young bachelor struggles to get a grasp on personal hygiene. His candor is refreshing and his gaze affixing. What will he say next, how is this allowed, and who will try to stop him. Only on patreon.

Late cuz I uploaded on hotspot, bro never came.

Comments

Hamzah what the hell with the food leftovers and the towel story it’s gonna keep me up at night

Doodlez

Selling pirated “out of character” Patreon edition podcast!!! $3.50 !! 🗣️🗣️

Shi

Your toes were pissing me off in this episode

Isaac

..lover..?

jenn

wow i am a certified comment liker

jenn

I’m in the US but many local libraries partner with apps such as libby or hoopla to allow you to check out/read ebooks and listen to audiobooks completely free! I do it all of the time, it’s so nice in the gym

Anna Pryor

listening to this in public ive never been so overstimulated inmy life gosh

gigi

what if you got… a moisturizer with spf…. two steps…

andrea

Uncommongoods.com has super cutesy quirky lil items. i love it. Very diverse range of stuff

asmaa

listening to this as im moving into my new apartment too twin🤞🫶

chelsie

honestly going to vintage shops and oddity shops r a really good way to get fun stuff for ur spot… we have this vintage parking meter lamp among other cool things :)

lalalala

get a lava lamp for your bedroom!

erin ⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚

this goddamn oreo story

erin ⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚

He’s onto something with putting dirty clothes in the washer😭😭

Yasmiin

madeline and emma DID NOT WANT TO SAY THIS 😭🫰

neishaaaa

the face wash thing is so real bc i used the “viral” panoxyl and it only made my acne worse 🤑🙅‍♀️

neishaaaa

tbh the less product you use on ur face the better

dasha 🔮

sleep is supperrr important it's expensive but i recommend the purple mattress they're so nice

Ryan

the identity and hinge thing is killing me... too real

Elena

my favorite extreme cheapskates clip is a man throwing a party at home and his hor d’oeuvres were a plate of canned beans with a toothpick sticking out of each one

Sereen

made me wanna wash him so bad 😩

isa

😭😭😭😭

isa

you discovering face wash and moisturizer reminds of me those videos where guys are discovering empathy for the first time through some really basic discovery like realizing that other people have feelings too 😭

isa

How is he so real the bit about life being a fluke is unbelievable real thankyou

Joseph Shepherd

Im so mad i didnt join the patreon earlier

Joseph Shepherd

just reactivated my membership WE ARE SO BACK💪💪💪

Chaelea

I just first $5 episode and I know what I’ve been missing my whole life

peyton

I finally got myself to pay the 5$ and I would like to say it’s worth it 😟

Leyden

the washer thing is valid, i think people are less inclined to do it because usually the washer isn’t always close enough to your room/bathroom so it seems inconvenient to bring it there vs having a basket nearby

Lilith Sweet

Talking about poop while referencing one line from a sitcom…a man after my own heart

Claudia

Hamzah , if you have spotify premium I’m pretty there a bumch of free audio books there! Idk what books exactly your reading but they have really good ones and ive been using it to listen to books for a while now!

Kat

I download audio books from pirate bay maybe you know how to torrent but look on YouTube if you don’t and then I just send the mp3 file to my phone. There’s no way I’m paying all that money to listen to a book haha

Omar Abdullahi

woo mf hoo

Kenz

you genuinely look so comfortable in that pile of clothes

hia

He might be a little stinky but I still luv him ♡

Anna 🍧 [Up...Plotting]

the library card thing is great, idk how it is in toronto but in ottawa the public library has "partner libraries" that u can also borrow from so if it's not available in one library, u can just get it somewhere else

soleen

If you separate your clothes by like delicates/colors or whatever the washer thing wouldn't work.

Sarah

it's okay we all love you for who you are stink <3

june

i was shocked when u said about the towel wtf. but i get u everything is stressful and there’s no time but that’s just how it is

Adam

not washing your hands after peeing is actually crazy hamzah pls

ash

i wish i had this luxury i fear it made mine stronger 💔 am i broken

bayli

Hamzah, I will make u home decor. I'm a graphic designer. @spireux on insta - visit my page or my website breh

mekena

personally i really wish i was born somewhere else as someone else so that my life would have more substance and i’d be happier and more successful but for now i’ll just be here watching life fly by while i am stuck in my own personal hell ❤️

bayli

might as well shit in your hands and clap atp

Tara Brewer

Not washing your hands after you pee is crazy work 😭😭

angel

Taking a strangers towel is crazy sorry hamzah

Khadija S

life expectancy was lower in the past partly bc of hygiene stuff like getting infections sndkskd

alexa

oh wow

alexa

15 mins in u talk about eating like an untouched piece of bruschetta and love because I was so hungry at a sorority formal and I literally just went around to empty tables and ate people’s untouched leftovers.

Emily Martin

Im so scared rn do you mean to tell us you’ve been using that ONE towel for EVERYTHING?! Been questioning my lesbianism and …. This was a step away from bisexuality for me ❤️

Haley Brooks

You can get free audiobooks through this: Google libgen and find a good link for the website. Download the pdf or epub, then put it into a text to speech reading app on your phone. It works for academic books, non fiction, and fiction books. It won't have every book and sometimes the pdf quality is low so the screen reader craps out, but its a good way to get a lot of free books

Daniel McAbee

For*

Alice Schacher

Foaming wash is good fore oily skin btw!! Just a little tip not a full other product

Alice Schacher

Oh really dang 😭

Izabelle Tewolde

I know u were taking more so of the influence and path of one’s self because of other people but it just came to mind

Krysten

35:20 so real bcs I went to target to get me a water bottle kind of thing with the ounces line and such bcs I’ve seen hamzah use one a lot. (For the record I’ve been wanting one for a while) and they didn’t have any. But what they did have and what I seen and got was a Rubiks cube something I’ve been wanting to learn but been putting off. And if I didn’t go to the store for a bottle, I wouldn’t be fixating over solving a Rubik’s cube atleast ten times a day

Krysten

Get a lamp w a pull string

Ms.tootie3

im kidding im not wishing it apon him😭

sophie mae

Advice is always one of my favorite parts of the podcast

Grant

Hey don’t say that

Grant

its chase

bria

i crier i thought it was a random whacking

hana

you are so brave for starting face wash

hana

do not worry my brother u are WINNING the unhygienic olympics

hana

“lets check each others assholes” i love my afternoon walks with ooc

Alice Schacher

apartment tour

bria

Wait until you notice first real signs of aging and then you will start taking care of future you

Margo

Adele did NOT sing that song

Arimiche

I feel u so hard on the face wash shit. I basically do it daily but my shit flares up without fail always covered in fucking oil fuck yalls clear clean texture less skin 🤬🤬🤬🤬

lily

THE POOL TOWEL💀👀 please im so happy you now have 3 towels fresh ass towels …that’s scary

Ndig

Washing your face isn’t a thing for looking pretty only! But also your skin is an organ and you need to take care of it just like you would your other organs! Hope this helps

raniya

"foot lovers rejoice!" yep and i'm refunding !!!

goby !!

my spotify plan has audiobooks included and it has most books out there. i think it’s only a pound or two more for me , not sure what it’s like in canada tho

hum + yan

Hamzah - search mid century furniture on facebook marketplace. There are many cool finds u can get on there for cheap. hope this helps :) Make a pinterest board if ur that kind of person

hum + yan

true actually lmao 😭

emily

Chicken wing or hot dog and baloney

Marley Tobin

HAMZAH isnt audible.com for audio books? might be subscription but i dont think its super expensive......

Emma Odonnell

i spend my adult money on the out of character podcast patreon, as any responsible adult would do!

ellie

Hi Hamzah, I am an RDH and I can say in school they tell us that the mechanical action of regular flossing is better than water flossing. Water flossing doesn’t replace regular flossing but it’s a good additive to have in your oral self care regime to flush out anything you miss with mechanical floss 👍

Sylvia

wait i missed this whaaat where did he say this

DawgInMe

dude you’re actually so right about the face wash making you break out, I had some sort of eczema break out on my face a couple of months ago so I had to stop using all and any skincare products including facewash, and my skin cleared up fully and i haven’t broken out since then either… kinda crazy

zahrala123

i’m honestly excited for the day i get to just take someone’s food they left behind it’s a dream of mine nothing better to me than free food😭😭😭being completely honest

nell

everytime the conversation comes up about how many times ppl should shower im always shamed like i run from that topic of convo

nell

Naww hamzah you won the must war with this one 😭💀 normally i match your musty but the things you shared today was abominable

DawgInMe

wayfair is cheaper

khalia

currently fighting stress and boredom and i took your advice and went on a two hour walk and listened to music. it worked surprisingly well. it was nice to be alone with my thoughts positively.

carly chase

I’ve moved on to the cross contamination contests and I’m losing my shit!! Glorious pod as always, go ahead and buy yourself a brand new Dave tender with my $5 monthly coupon 😄

Peanus butter

there’s a dave hot chicken being built up the street from me and i can’t wait bc of how much u talk about it

Abby

tatcha products are so good but so expensive 😭

dove

Ok cause i thought i was trippin😭💀

Mrbeast9000

Try the white chocolate covered strawberries in muji theyre so good!!

Nes

girl please wash your hands when u pee u are literally stunting your lifespan by 20 years😭

sophie mae

i was looking for this comment lmaoo im geekin over this

Izabelle Tewolde

Please give us an apartment tour im too curious

Izabelle Tewolde

The cerave face wash and nighttime moisturizer is what I use for my skin which is also really oily and it has literally SAVED my skin. I just use it at night in the shower and when I wake up in the morning my skin feels soooo smooth.

iguessitsleanne

That's crazy. I'm a 22 year old girl also with a degree in healthcare (nursing) and ALSO don't really wash my face. I exfoliate and maybe like once every 2 days I use cerave.

iguessitsleanne

doesn't ikea have decently priced mattresses?? i swear my queen was 400-500??

kat

Top floor baddies in buildings over 20 years old unite 🙂‍↔️🙂‍↔️🙂‍↔️

Van Groves

did you end up checking out Pride with Martin?

Sam

i love ur podcast man

liana

he’s waiting for the internet guy to do WHAT in his apartment 😲

mary

nah some of this podcast had me gagged lmao (derogatory)

Sarah

say less 🤭

Malorie Keylon

absolutely

Malorie Keylon

too focused on your foot moving sporadically like a wild animal 😍

adc4t

He called her stinky ass too Adele catching strays

asura

i need a waterflossing tutorial bc when I tried it once it felt like it was doing nothing?? and also water was getting everywhere I was getting so annoyed

eeveentually

The Patreon is his diary

Veronica

i love the advice section you are number one good advice boy to me

el snoopy

I’m a 22yr old girl with a degree in healthcare and I do not use a face wash soooooo, good on you for using one. Also the washing machine as a laundry basket idea is genius I can’t believe people aren’t doing this already the only con I can see u running into is your clothes acquiring a sort of mildew smell. If I ever accidentally leave my clothes in the washing machine after they’re done washing for longer than a day I feel like they get a mildew smell to them. But as long as ur clothes and washing machine are dry while it’s in the state of being a “laundry basket” I think u should be good. Great idea Hamzah!

A

for pirating audiobooks try annas-archive.gs 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️

el snoopy

I chose not to commit the early learning experience to memory but it must’ve been chunky for sure

DC Grainger

i use a moisturiser that has SPF in it so that i don’t have to do 2 things

aneya

somehow, him suggesting germs were discovered only 40 years ago is the least crazy thing he said this ep 😭

Dani

Babes don’t pay for $100 moisturer for oily skin. Buy the neutrogena water surge $13 saved my skin lol

Zoe Harumi

I always love the silly little descriptions

miajhdy

bidet users rise

Malak

it was so stressful

aysha

coming from a musty girl i will never understand why men don’t wash their hands after they piss

aneya

omg he has a gf tea

riley abigail

You can’t use your washing machine as a laundry basket because there’s different categories of clothes that need to be washed together and separately so you would run the risk of damaging your clothes by washing the wrong materials together

riley abigail

15:10 hamzah i promise u i have never thought about that

riley abigail

he should definitely invest in a diary…

emily

Skincare beyond the 3 items mentioned is a SCAM

cadence

THISSSSS

Leilany Cruz

washer as a laundry basket is actually genuis lowkey...let him cook

chloe’

new fav song, what doesnt kill you makes you stronger by Adele 🔥

chloe’

lets all give hamzah hygiene tips

bba

him talking about little him in third person did something for me

g4briiell4

defending being grubby by comparing yourself to british colonialists is CRAZY 😭

nia

ur so funny

kt rose

this podcast singlehandedly ended my crush on you, thank you hamzah🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾

safiya

tatcha water cream being the same one my mom uses😭😭😭

safiya

you can only throw your dirty clothes in the washer if you live alone my brother does it all the time pisses me off so bad I don't wanna wash ur underwear with my clothes

aysha

REALLL

vvan

lowkey the only thing fucking with your skin is probably your diet.. forget all the face washes and serums once i stopped eating junk and drank more water my skin was just naturally less oily and my acne cleared for the most part

jas 🩷

i wash my shower curtains 🧍🏻‍♀️

mariem

Omhu couch, Akari lamps/lights, and for some inspo @theartofinteriors & @kaerukeki on tiktok

Basma

ham man this episode enlightened me that even the pretty boys on youtube are grody gro just like me

Hiccup

just make ur apartment look like what youd consider ur dream apartment I just put lots of things that are my favorites the decorating in ur last apartment was good w the arthur n thomas the train heh heh

im only here for hamzah like

i actually think its chase now because wasnt he in the freddie dredd video with hamzah

elijah

i actually think its chase that staying with hamzah; hes the guest, because of his appearance in the freddie dredd video

elijah

I’ve been quoting you a bit too much lately to the point where my mom thinks I’ve been taking drugs

Zoe

i don't listen to audio books really but i can sometimes find audios on youtube

serena

my theory is Freddie, idk tho

Veronica

its almost 5am and im home LETS GOOO hamzah time

Ursula Ahmar

this is the perfect episode to watch high bc you talked about hygiene for so long I locked in

Emma

Okay we have the same skin care routine

moleypie

oreos arent even real them hoes probably never go bad like those time lapses of burgers

adeliya

House warming YouTube video with the nice woman you made friend with from goodwill 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽

Slader

Adele did NOT sing what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger 😭😭😭

Veronica

Wow. This is just what I needed after the latest episode of Love Island USA. Thank you Hamzah for saving my day!

Lili

Love the setup

diana

btw it smells like pool water but it’s worth it. it’s a calming ingredient

karla m

i used to have fungal acne my holy grail is hypochlorous acid from amazon. i use it on damp face then moisturizer. or you can spray it on your face throughout the day.

karla m

thanks for giving us musty white women a voice 🥹 we will not be silenced

katie paul

cuntfortable

roro

i’ll decorate ur apt in sims if u post pics or a floor plan 💯

olivia

U would love Biologique recherche p50 lotion - it’s the luxe skincare version of a mens 3in1 wash

Ms.tootie3

New house looks homey homie

Shea Brandon

this podcast already gets pirated on tiktok

j

okay last thing get an oil cleanser and then ur DONE 🙏 u can’t take sunscreen off with just a face wash sadly…. it can just b jojoba oil something light 💅 u deserve to have nice skin hamzah !!!!!

Em

Friday funday w hamzah

Alina

If u search up book name vk u might be able to or Anna’s library

mads

BOY do you know what we had before germs were discovered??? THE BUBONIC PLAGUE!! MULTIPLE TIMES IN FACT!!

serena

Yess muji!!! Their pens are the only ones I use

serena

you’re letting out so many secrets oh my…

egg

hamzah you need an esthetician!!! and it needs to be me! ill give u a free facial 😽

riley abigail

Band 4 band?? Na asshole for asshole🙏🏼🙏🏼

Anthony

Maybe personal hygiene is the friends we made along the way

Abril 🎱

im hoping the guest thats staying with him is claire

elijah

woah.. who let the dogs out 😍

steph

washing ur face is a lot of effort i dont blame u 😭 i still have trouble keeping up with skincare at times but ik i must to keep those pimples at bay

kelz

Some skincare advice/recommendation for oily skin: - Youth To The People Superfood Gentle Antioxidant (cleanser) - for moisturizer go for lightweight formulas - oil-free products - and if your skin is sensitive, always go for products with little to no added fragrance

serena

I believe it was ms. Kelly clarkson that would have eaten the Oreo

Rileigh

Ok gold knobs i see you 😍😍 level up level up level up

Marly

Congratulations handsome Hamzah you have more than 1 room now yay also try not to dox yourself so much this time wish you the best <33

Zafiro

foot so close up its like watching in 3d

kelz

I throw my clothes in the washer like a laundry basket sometimes lol but it just makes me want to leave clothes in the dryer too and just running it to de wrinkle. not a good habit in my case 😔

Jennifer !!

Honestly I’m so happy for you Hamzah!🥹🎉 tell someone to get you a money plant as a house warming gift (in addition to the ninja creamy)

serena

Who the freak washes their shower curtains..

Ned

Most important thing I learned from this episode is never shake this man’s hand.

AJ

i want to be surprised but at the end of the day you are a man

Sab islam

have u gotten food off the website before and is it good Im tempted

kt rose

i liked what you said about stress and the cloud following you. very motivational. it reminds me of that quote ‘wherever you go, you will be there. you can’t outrun yourself.’ maybe u should write a book. 48 laws of peter or something idk

donald hump

omg they got soup wtf lets go

kt rose

ur better than me I just wash my face and put on a moisturizer with spf and call it a day. any amount of spf is sunscreen in my eyes :*

kt rose

im happy to be going through the process of movinh as hamzah does i feel so seen in my empty apartment on my self inflating air matresd

Briana A

Lets just laugh and walk away! Hamzah pee hands

Bwee

put me onto muji man I'm shopping as we speak with my dehydrated checking

kt rose

Is the hobby fishing

Jennifer !!

how u gon touch ur wee waz n then not wash ur hands

aubrey

SPOILED MILK !?? was it solid ?

aubrey

Get that blue bean couch

Bwee

oreos are like twinkies like they never go bad. they’ll go stale but that’s it. they’re magically engineered cookies made to satiate u even after years under your bed. give in to the oreo

aubrey

About to go on my lunch, thanmk

Anthony

heres ur public shaming comment for not using multiple face/body towels.. ik the bacteria brewing in your single pool towel went crazy

alyssa 𐙚

ngl I also didn't wash my face properly until the start of this year. I thought using water in the shower was fine

beth

my parents were PISSED bitch I was 3!!!

DC Grainger

btw one time when I was 3 I drank a glass of milk that had been under my bed for weeks and contracted salmonella

DC Grainger

I have a theory that the friend in question is a man named chase

replayesa

lit thought you were coming to us from an airbnb it looks sooooo legit allahumabarik

zahra

Came right on time! It’s a tropical storm out rn so I need the comfort

Vibin’ •

yas congrats on the new apartment

esme

Hes insane

sham

Ewwww you walk around with pee hands??!! Ha ha pee hands

Bwee

Ur hygienists doing too much ill go a while without flossing and go to the dentist and mine still tell me my teeth bootyful

alina

RE washer as a laundry basket: i do this and it works

gurleeeeeeeeeen

Babes u can’t wash specific clothes together like whites and reds it will turn pink luv but good try <3 lowk u did cook a lil

Faith

Face towels are a hygiene scam u can use ur wahed hands as a squeegee and air dry for free instead

Ms.tootie3

glad to know you’re spending my $5 on skincare

cande

i use my washer as a basket 😔

Nicole ☆

i never knew people actually separated their clothes. the most i do is dry my clothes with no heat… like woah…

Gabrielle

Hamzah invest in sunscreen too or else all your effort is money wasted

Bwee

people separate their laundry into light colors and dark colors … that’s why they don’t use the washer as a hamper 😔 I’m so sorry

Ella

a queen sized mattress fit for a queen 😍

paige

Ok mr tatcha water cream face💰💸

Ms.tootie3

me and my friend went to the movies and i saw a slice of pizza that was untouched, i took it and ate it my friend had the rest of it

Nicole ☆

Hamzah why are you no longer lurking in the comments come back imy

amannynadya

get a satin pillow case blud it helps sm with skin and hair

alina

keep ur setup like this

yuji

the immediate hand change when the thumbs up emoticon shows up 😭

trapnevt

Hello everynyan ^_^

Anna 🍧 [Up...Plotting]

the “thumbs up” is so uncool

dellptvhead

hammy boy

bayli

Just in time! I got my food

Bwee

its not adel its kelly clarkson 😔

Nicole ☆

i’ve eaten bare ass oreos from the bottom of my backpack i feel like this is a confession group now

aubrey

Do you pee in the shower?

skyler 🍎

that under the bed oreo was always lit, immaculate flavor and texture

antihoni

hamzah im on my hands and knees begging for a merch drop pls for the love of god

paige

my heart my lung my liver my spleen my kidney my colon my back my neck my eye my nose my ear my organ my lung

im only here for hamzah like

i stopped doing skin care and my skin is now clearer then when i was using skin care 😭😭

Nicole ☆

hydraulic acid

aubrey

i was absolutely a fatty as a kid and i understand the irresistible oreo. but even then

Malorie Keylon

proud of you

im only here for hamzah like

love you pumpkin keep going sweetheart

im only here for hamzah like

the apartment looks really good from here actually 😛

khlowart

feet lovers everywhere are doing backflips rn 😍🙏🏻

paige

the three year old oreo….. hamzito…

Malorie Keylon

uploading this while im cleaning my room Thank You.

val

very happy my $5 is going to hamzah finally washing his face💪🏽💪🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽

Simrit

poop and crack pipes is insane and also magical

bayli

bro never came, but i did😛💪🏽

khalia

ofc the wifi guy not coming is something that would happen to u 😭

ella 🧃

What a fun new angle

leah

I have to go im getting a call brb

emily

happy hamzah friday 🫶

Ashlie Mason

So happy for you hamzah!!

maya

🤲

Jennifer !!

Hello hamzah😁

buzitz

we break glasses for new apartments i didn’t know this T

blerp

YAS my 2am bedtime pod

michaela

😋😋

Joce!

hammy 😭😭

Nicole ☆

New apartment new hamzah!!

Courtney!

just got off work perfect timing to see some hamzah feet !!

Lucia

YAY AC IM SO HAPPY FOR YOU 😓❤️❤️

mari

i’ll come clean for u for 1 billion dollars!!! take it or leave it hammy

bayli

Wow new house is beautiful mashallah

amannynadya

been waiting for this one 😁😁

Christina

hamzah i am drunk i love you cant wait to watch this when im home its 2am rn

Ursula Ahmar

on the train rn outing my character

Simrit

looks so nice

emily

I’m only a minute in but great eye contact so far Hamzah!

Grace

ty for blessing us 🙌

Ava

new apartment yay!!!

carrington

this is my super bowl

lutopia

omg new location unlocked

katie paul

I had to watch Germany lose today 💔💔💔 I really needed this

laura

been waiting for this 😻 now I can clean 👼🏽 editing this cuz dirty hands after u pee?!?!?!

sam🌟

hotspot is crazy

Ava

Yippee

Isabel Broomfield

Perfect setup

skyler 🍎

THATS AN INSANE DESCRIPTION HAMZAH

soooop

oh hell yeah perfect timing i’m about to destroy this wingstop

bayli

this is exactly what i needed. i almost clicked on a slushy yt video

Malorie Keylon

Was just wondering where you were Hamster

lynn

thank god

teresa

omg! i forgot it was hamzah friday 😋😋😋😋😋😋

j

hammzzzxzzahhhh

Malorie Keylon

AYYYYYYYYYYYY

zoe mora

As a foot lover I am rejoicing

GracieSigmaNutz

LETS FREAKING GOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Karly m

Finally best part of the day

Magnum Opus

yassss

Malaya

This is so awesome sauce

Lucy

in theaters watching maxxxine rn

eloise heeks

watching this on vacay

jujuslayqueen

needed this after finding out i have covid 🙏😔

Nicole ☆

hey cutie

sarah reeves

woooo new background just dropped

Alice Schacher

good mythical night hamzah

Mykenzie

Hooray happy hamzah friday

skyler 🍎

just what I needed

manda

he always makes my hangovers better

jaedynsou

I’ve accidentally pulled up on time bc lightning woke me up god bless Mother Nature she’s a slushy noob

DC Grainger

Hell yeahhhh! Time to lock in 🫡

yas


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