My Hero Automata (Chapters 20-21)
Added 2023-09-01 23:32:07 +0000 UTCTime for the first update of September! We're starting off this month fairly strong, with a solid 6k words of My Hero Automata. Like last month, I'm splitting the total content release of this story into two batches. This one and another mid-month. Both of them will be covering the third day of the Heroics Tournament! That said, they aren't all that heavily focused on the fights themselves, since that would be kind of dull. Also, I'm honestly not that great at writing action. I'm not bad at it, per se, I'm just better with world building and character interactions than action scenes.
This first half moves pretty quickly through the initial round, covering only a few fights and some exposition. Since I don't want the Tournament dragging on forever, I simply can't show every fight. Fights will get more detailed as the number of participants comes down to something more reasonable than 40 ;-).
As usual, the story is attached to the post in both PDF and Epub formats, and I'll be updating the master files in the pinned post shortly.
Comments
😂haha that nier analogy was spot on hahaha. I can’t wait to see what’s in store!
Riley Thatcher
2023-09-08 20:12:43 +0000 UTCI've been working on the next section of the story the last two days, and I'm going to try out 2B's perspective, I think, to see how it works. It won't be anything major, but it will let me get a feel for it. Anything else will have to wait until next month, after I've finished covering the Tournament. I'm thinking I might be able to squeeze a bit of time with Inko in between the Tournament and Internships. Just a scene or two to start the process of establishing that relationship in-story. No promises, though. I haven't sat down yet to see if I think I can make it work :-). As for the Neir Automata cast being that young...yeah, that REALLY threw me when I sat down to do my initial research for the crossover. I thought I had to be wrong at first, but every source I can/could find pointed to them only being 2-3 years out from their first activations. Even YorHa itself isn't NEARLY as old as the impression I got of it in the game. It was apparently founded rougly around 11,932 and 2B was activated in 11942. Meaning even YorHa as a whole was only like 13 years old when 2B died. A few of the individual units that made the organization up, like Commander White and A2, might be older than that. A2 was a prototype for the entire YorHa class of androids, and Commander White was already in charge during the very first Yorha operation (and might not actually be a YorHa class android herself). But their exact activation dates are unknown. Even A2 is likely less than 20. Which is REALLY mind blowing when the Nier universe normally functions on prolonged time periods. Some of the other androids/replicants/machines still around (such as Devola and Popola) are over a thousand years old. Pascal is at least 200. And so on. The entire Nier Automata plot must have been like watching a train wreck in high-speed to many of those older models O.O...
Novus Peregrine
2023-09-07 23:41:36 +0000 UTCThis gives me so much hope for the future, and if this is the flavoring that has been scarce so far, I hope it ends up like my pancakes in syrup, Drowned haha. Also don’t worry about writing angst if it is harmful for you. No fic will ever be that important no matter what asshole comments. An interlude of therapy and Inko would be like a dream if it ever happens. I also had no idea she was that young. Sheez. With how old A2 is made out to be as being one of the first YorHa, I assumed that androids were long lived. Seriously though, I would read a 50,000 word therapy session if I could. Alas, I’m a minority. Actually that should be an option for the monthly poll🤣🤣🤣more side stories for this or final error! As always never think I’m asking you of anything and continue on with your day, hopefully with a light heart and a jig in your step. Write on TAI’ SHAR fanfic writers.
Riley Thatcher
2023-09-07 06:14:12 +0000 UTCFirst, no worries about coming on too strong ;-). You weren't rude about it, which is what matters to me. Second...hmmm. You actually DID bring up a problem I need to address, even if it wasn't quite the one you intended. Or, well, it sort of it. It matches the later part of your comment, at least. Specifically, the actual problem is (I think) that I really need to show 2B's actions and thoughts more than I have. I'll need to mull that over to consider exactly the best way to do that. But my first thought is to start showing a few snippets from her perspective. I usually don't perspective swap in my stories nearly as much as I have in this one. But I HAVE done that in this one, so there's no real reason I can throw in some from 2B's point of view in order to help alleviate the issue. I'll just need to fight against my usual instincts to keep that to a minimum ;-). The reason this is the problem is because there's a lot about 2B and Izumi's interactions that I've worked but, but that hasn't shown itself in the story. Which is 100% my fault. A lot of the problem originates from the fact that I speed-ran through Izumi's growing-up period. Which, frankly, I did because I personally tend to dislike fics that spend 100,000+ words just GETTING to canon events. The truth is that there's a LOT more going on with 2B in the background than I've covered or drawn attention to. A few points, just for your personal reference so you can see what I mean. 1) It actually actively startled me when I first figured this out, but 2B is only like, 3 years old (or less!) when she dies in Neir Automata. She functions as an 'adult' because she was programmed that way. But she and 9S were only active for 2-3 years from their first activation. Possibly up to 3.5 for 9S. This still confuses me to this day, since it makes the whole 9S being repeatedly reset thing much weireder. Until I did my research for this fic, I'd assumed both of them had been functioning together for a lot longer, though with only 2B remembering all of it. I took this into account when thinking about how 2B would actually interact with her new world. Particularly one so radically different from what she knew before. The result was that I treated her like someone who had near-infinite amounts of Theoretical data...but very little practical experience. And who was, in a lot of ways, actually very very young. In a lot of ways, I consider her to have 'grown-up' alongside Izumi, with Izumi's mother actually having a tendency to mother 2B the same way she did her daughter. Teaching a lot of life lessons to 2B right along with Izumi, loving her just as much, and helping her grow and heal a lot. I'm realizing now that I probably made a terrible mistake by not showing an interaction or two between them (2B and Inko). And, once the Heroics Tournament is over, it's something I'm going to have to address quickly. I just need to work out how to do that naturally... 2) I mentioned this elsewhere, I think. In a comment on Ao3. But Izumi has a therapist. It was something that was supposed to be mentioned when everyone was forced into a session post-USJ. But I think it actually may have gotten removed from that section. An oversight on my part that's going to have to be fixed by detailing it later. Possibly actually introducing the therapist and showing a session. Particularly because that therapist isn't JUST Izumi's. A huge chunk of the reason that Izumi needed a therapist in the first place was that all the identity issues that pretty much EVERYONE has going through their puberty and early teen years were amplified massively by 2B's presence. Izumi never really resented her, but 2B's constant influence and the fact that it even started to carry over into how Izumi physically looked during puberty, would pretty obviously cause some distress. Both Izumi and 2B have received both joint and independent counseling (They CAN shut down their mental link and just not share if they want to. I can neither confirm nor deny that their therapist may have squealed over 2B's adorable doll form the first time she used it for an independent therapy session), which is part of why both of them are relatively stable. It's also why Izumi's anxiety is still present, but under solid control, only really getting to her when she has to deal with a lot of people all at once. Which, thankfully, is one of the things Momo is good at and usually steps in to help handle. This was all thought through, but handled off-screen and meant to be slowly trickled in as flavor, which I've done a bit of a poor job of so far in retrospect. Mostly, again, because I pushed forward too fast. As for the reason I'm handling it mostly off-screen. That's because, frankly, I HATE writing depression and angst. I've suffered from both depression and anxiety myself, off and on, for years. While for some people it helps to write about it, for me it's always made it worse to do so. As a result, everything I write tends to be somewhat lighthearted. Acknowledging issues, showing that they are real things that need dealing with, but mostly handling it off-screen. 3) 2B spends a lot of her time and processing power on the net. While Izumi needs to partially transform to gain that ability...2B has it always on. And 2B's version of hyper-cognition doesn't really shut down either. I'm not going to detail this too much, because I would be giving away important things I have planned for down the line ;-). But 2B has a lot more friends than is apparent. They just aren't around physically... ---- I actually appreciate you bringing this to my attention, by the way! It's extremely easy to lose track of what I've simply thought through, and what I've actually written into the story. And this highlighted a big oversight in need of adjusting for. Thanks!
Novus Peregrine
2023-09-07 05:57:58 +0000 UTCSorry if I came on too strong, just passionate. Haha
Riley Thatcher
2023-09-06 16:38:06 +0000 UTCI think almost every element of this story has been executed to perfection, but I think 2B could use a “tune up” haha. I get you are trying not to get into automata stuff that’s much, but playing that game proved that at their core, androids are human too. I think that 2B has been sidelined into such a role as the pods were in the game. Back near the beginning 2B confronts Izumi about not having any other friends. I think the same is true of 2B. She is a person as well, and I think the past 15 or so years as a quirk would definitely have worn her down. Especially since she had to leave everything and everyone she has ever loved. I’m sure she cherishes Izumi just as much now, but that doesn’t mitigate past losses. Now here is how I would fix it.(don’t read into this as me asking you to do this, this is just honestly what I would do.) I would make is so that 2B does have this past trauma, but chose to protect 5 year old Izumi from it by ignoring it and pushing it aside. And then she decided even when she came of age not to burden her with it. I think this is perfect as it fits her personality perfectly as the stoic protector. I feel like eventually these bottled up feelings would keep taking her down further and further as time passes as she has never truly faced them. And I think this would eventually make her start to spiral out of control and be unreliable to the point that Izumi and Momo would have to make an intervention.(personal theory here but 2B is going to get a full functional body of her own right? I sensed that foreshadowing a mile away when it was mentioned she had a small doll form for Izumi to hug.) IF that were to be in the future of this story, I would chose this time of self reflection and sadness to introduce it. (But I’m probably going off on a tangent and am totally wrong!) Anyway, I don’t feel like 2B feels like an actual person in this fic. Some scenes are better than others but most of what she does could be done with a more rudimentary AI. Not someone we are told time and time again is a PERSON. Anyway, sorry if I came on to hard.😅
Riley Thatcher
2023-09-06 00:58:37 +0000 UTCOf course I am! So long as you're constructive about it, rather than just complaining about something you don't like, I'm always open to feedback! I may not agree, or might have reasons you don't know about for doing something. But I'll always at least listen :-).
Novus Peregrine
2023-09-06 00:43:52 +0000 UTCHey are you open to some feedback? I think you are doing a fantastic job, and I could never hope to reach what you’ve done here. But there is something I think is being overlooked
Riley Thatcher
2023-09-05 06:33:21 +0000 UTC
