Somebody Stop Them. Chapter 42: Retaliation

“Welcome to Oodway,” Oodway Ningen employee Kimbercha Sawl drawled through the speaker. “Are you collecting any points toda…”

Kimbercha choked on her words, her heart hammering into the depths of her chest when she saw the abomination that was parked at the Oodway drive-through through the camera. It was a Corpse Seeker.

The biggest Corpse Seeker she’s seen in her entire life. Gargantuan, blood-red crystalline legs held up the unnatural monstrosity in the air, dragon-organs pulsating within its innards.

“No to the points,” a male voice said.

"I thought we were going to McOodlass?" A female voice asked.

"You heard Mr. Fox, Skittles!" Another female laughed. "Nobody expects the Spanish Corpse-Seeker Inquisition when you change plans around!"

"I'd like three number four footlongs," the male voice continued after a chortle. "And three Oodshakes - one strawberry, one vanilla, one chocolate!"

"Would... would you like fries with that?" Kimbercha stammered, struggling to maintain her professional demeanor while facing a massive crystalline death machine in her drive-through.

"Ye," the female voice added. "’Nd a bucket of extra large fries to share!"

"Please, urm, erm... drive forward to the first window," Kimbercha managed with a shaky voice.

The massive crystalline construct moved forward with surprising grace, its countless legs clicking against the asphalt. A crystalline, circular window slid open, revealing a Thunderbird wearing a dark hexasuit, a cheerful fox in a lavish red jacket and a rainbow-winged Quetzalcoatl in a white sweater.

"Hi!" The Kitsune teenager waved cheerfully at the terrified Oodway employee. "Lovely day, isn't it?"

"That'll be... that'll be 47.99," Kimbercha squeaked, accepting a gold card from the Thunderbird.

. . .

The server's hand trembled as I swiped the gold Thunder & Rainbow corporate card for the meal, the Oodway machine beeping a cheerful little tune.

“P-please go to the second window,” she stammered, disappearing from the window with almost unnatural speed.

"Ah yes," Vespera nodded. "Now this is the kind of service I like to see! People really respect you when you drive the right kind of vehicle!”

“I aim to please, my thunderous fiancée,” I said. Cinder snorted beside me.

"We've yet to establish your fiance-ness status," Vespera said with a thoughtful look.

"Establish it how?" I asked her.

"You can start by giving me back my talons," she said.

"Are you gonna mod yourself?" I squinted at her.

"Mmmm no," she said. "I'm like half me and half fake-me right now. Fragile balance. Not gonna tip it one way or the other… yet. It’ll be easier to drive with me gloves. Plz gibs.”

"Fine," I said, handing her the magisteel talons. "I'll trust you."

"Ugh," she whined, sliding her bird-skull gloves back onto her fingers. "You cut through the leather straps, you butt. They wobbly now!"

I shrugged in reply.

The second Oodway window slid open again, revealing a tray laden with footlong sandwiches, a bucket overflowing with fries, and three brightly colored Oodshakes. The second Oodway employee looked like he was about to faint.

“Thank you very much,” Vespera bobbed her head at the server. “Have a verrrry lovely day!"

The server nodded, seemingly at a loss for words.

"Drive-through efficiency rating, 20 out of 10," Vespera declared, accepting the tray with a flourish and settling it between us, directing Possy to take off at ludicrous speed.

Cinder grabbed her footlong. "That poor Oddway employee looked like she was on the verge of a heart attack."

"Fear is a powerful motivator!" Vespera declared, unwrapping her sandwich with her re-taloned hands. "Now, they'll have a story to tell. 'Remember that time a giant crystal tank ordered lunch?' Good for business, really!"

I chuckled, reaching for my own footlong. "Always thinking of the bigger picture, my business-minded birb."

"A job of a goodly Promo is business," Vespera mumbled around a mouthful of sandwich. "I aim to please. Ah!" She snapped her talons, raining sparks over her lap. "Right!"

"What?" I asked her.

"Remembered what I gotta do!" She grinned. "Gimme a phone. You got Thornheart on there, yes?"

"Yes," I handed her my phone. "I've been working with him and Justice Nova to legally procure an island from the Stratos Clan."

“Convenient!” Vespera’s talons danced across the screen, her brow furrowed in concentration.  She speed-dialed Thornheart, holding the phone to her ear with a wing tip, crumbs of footlong clinging to her beak.

“Thornheart, it’s Vee,” she announced, her voice crisp and businesslike, a stark contrast to the slightly dazed and emotional bird from thirty minutes ago. “I'm back."

"Good to have you back, my Lady," the Attorney replied. "Shall we proceed with the plan?"

"Ye," Vespera nodded. "Do it. Initiate the bigly plan."

"What plan?" Cinder asked.

"The business plan," Vespera replied. "What, you think I almost died for nothing?"

Cinder squinted at the Thunderbird.

Vespera threw fries into her mouth, directing Miss Possible towards Cradlefall downtown.

“Plan… what plan?” Cinder poked Vespera with a wing tip. “You didn’t tell us about a plan. Do you have any idea how worried I was?”

“Sorrikins,” Vespera sighed dramatically, rolling her eyes. “I didn't want to talk about the plan. Talking about plans makes the plans visible in the Astral. S’ super secret stuff."

"Okay, but doesn't your attorney know the plan?" Cinder asked.

"Nah," Vespera shook her head. "He's going to learn of the plan now! He only knows that the plan exists, but he has no idea what it is until he opens the envelope!"

"So you..." Cinder began.

"Nope, I didn't know the plan either. Planned it in another dimension, sealed the envelopes in a dimensional bag, shipped it to Thorney and erased it from my own head. Maximum conspiracy," Vespera snatched a fry from the bucket, pointing it at Cinder like a tiny, greasy sword. “The plan is unfolding now, when it's already too late to stop it!"

Cinder huffed, crossing her arms. “I’m not a fan of being kept in the dark, Vee.”

“Relax, Skittles,” Vee clicked. "This is for a good business cause."

"Ugh," Cinder whined. "Of all the things, you had to remember that stupid nickname!"

"What?" Vespera laughed. "It's cute. You're cute. The cutest winged creature! Accept your cute-ness! Cuteness is a valid strategic asset for a Hearth Keeper to posess. Yo, Thornheart, I hear that these two devious critters got Justice Nova on our side?"

"Yes, my Lady," the Attorney said. "He is heading to the office now!"

"Good," Vespera grinned. "This makes things easier. Faster. Faster is good. I have chosen quality besties." She stared at me. "Thank you for bringing me back so quickly, Mr. Fox. Well, half back. I still don’t remember you.”

"What about the other half?" I asked.

"Not yet," she said. "I need to be visibly bork for this to work."

"For what to work?!" Cinder demanded.

"Business plottery!" Vespera clicked.

Possy slowed in front of an office building and then changed direction 90 degrees and began climbing upwards, crystalline claws digging into the hexacrete structure. Upon reaching the 30th floor the tank stopped and a crystalline tunnel formed in the left side of its interior leading to what appeared to be a large, open office window.

Vespera chugged her chocolate shake, shuddered and stood up.

"Come, come!" She grabbed me and Cinder. "It is unfolding!"

“What is unfolding?!” The Quetzi girl demanded with an exasperated look.

“Everything!” Vespera laughed madly as she practically dragged us through the crystalline tunnel, emerging directly into a plush, if somewhat sterile, office.  

Attorney Thornheart, looking even more impeccably dressed than usual, stood near a massive window overlooking Cradlefall. Justice Nova, surprisingly, was also present, his Dover Demon features unreadable as he observed the scene.  Behind a large, ornate desk, sat a towering figure draped in flowing black robes.

“This is Psychopomp Groshnik Kolaskirr,” Thornheart introduced us to the skeletal, lanky Omnid.

Vespera strode into the room like she owned the place, releasing our hands and heading straight for the Psychopomp’s desk.  

"My Lady, I understand you require a diagnostic assessment?" Groshnik asked.

"Ye," Vespera nodded, jumping onto the desk and spreading her arms. "Determine the damage please."

The Psychopomp leaned forward affixing his obsidian eyes on Vespera. His skeletal hands reached out and grasped her head and wrist.

"Hrm," Groshnik began, his gaze intense, “Extensive mental damage. Many internal self-state layers… peeled back, overwritten, shattered and… stitched together again with… ill-fitting Thunder-thread.”

He trailed off, his many-jointed fingers tipped with obsidian claws, tapping a slow, rhythmic beat on Vespera's temple and wrist.  "Compared to my last scan, you have been mentally unbalanced, my Lady."

"Ye," Vespera nodded. "Can you tell who did it?"

“The… psychic architecture,” Groshnik said, “is akin to a building struck by lightning, then hastily rebuilt with mismatched bricks. Yes. I see the perpetrator in my mind's eye. This was done by none other than your father, Lord Ceter. His Astral imprint is responsible for this mental devastation."

“So you confirm psychic damage?” Thornheart asked.

Groshnik straightened up. “Yes, Attorney. Significant psychic trauma. In my professional opinion, Lady Vespera Simmi has been subjected to… forceful, unauthorized and frankly, barbaric mental interference.”

Thornheart nodded. He produced a stack of official-looking documents from a sleek, black briefcase – presumably the contents of Vespera’s “envelopes.”

“Psychopomp Kolaskirr,” Thornheart’s voice was smooth, yet carried an undercurrent of steel, “Based on your expert assessment, would you be willing to officially document your findings? Specifically, confirming the extent and nature of the psychic damage inflicted upon Lady Vespera, and attributing said damage to unauthorized mental intrusion?”

"Of course," Groshnik said. “That is what I was hired to do.”

Thornheart nodded curtly with a flicker of deep satisfaction. He slid the stack of documents across the polished desk towards Justice Nova, the crisp rustle of legal parchment momentarily filling the sterile office air.

Justice Nova’s gaze, cold and assessing, dropped to the documents. His grey Dover Demon scales shimmered faintly in the artificial light as he began to meticulously review each page, his large, orange eyes scanning the dense legal text with unnerving speed. Beside him, perched on the edge of the desk like a living, crystalline paperweight, Justice Nova’s Infix Kitlix pulsed with a soft, internal light. The Kitlix, seemingly an extension of Justice Nova’s own evaluation, swiveled its multifaceted crystal eye, first towards the Psychopomp, then towards Thornheart, its gaze lingering for a moment on each before returning to its master.

The silence in the room stretched, punctuated only by the deep hum of Miss Possible’s dragonheart and the almost imperceptible crystalline clicks emanating from the Infix Kitlix. 

Vespera tapped her talons impatiently on the desk, her usual boundless energy now channeled into a tightly wound tension. Cinder stood remarkably still, her rainbow wings folded tight against her back, her ocean-blue eyes fixed on Justice Nova’s face, searching for any telltale flicker of emotion.

Finally, Justice Nova looked up, his expression still unreadable, but a subtle shift in his posture hinted at a decision reached. He set the documents down with a precise tap of his scaled hand, the sound echoing in the quiet office. His gaze, sharp and unwavering, settled first on Groshnik.

“Psychopomp Kolaskirr,” Justice Nova’s deep, rumbling baritone betrayed nothing of his internal thoughts. “Your professional reputation precedes you. My Infix Kitlix confirms the veracity of your assessment. You are stating, under oath and documented for Omnithornian legal record, that Lady Vespera Simmi has suffered significant psychic damage as a direct result of unauthorized mental intrusion, and that this intrusion bears the signature of Lord Ceter Kalik Simmi?”

"Correct, Justice," Groshnik said. “I am.”

"By erasing my memories and damaging my psyche, Lord Ceter effectively attempted to murder the Prima-Heir of SimmiTech. Under Omnithornian Corporate Law, section 662, paragraph 13, this constitutes attempted heir-cide. Under Corporate Succession Law 775, any attempt to forcibly remove Prima-Heir's life constitutes a Class-1 Corporate felony, punishable by immediate forfeiture of all corporate assets and voting rights," Vespera hammered out, waving one of the legal papers she grabbed.

Cinder stared at the Thunderbird with wide eyes.

"Ah!" Vespera clicked, tapping her head. "Part two! Commere, potential fiancee Foxy!"

She pulled me to Psychopomp. "Scan both of us, Mr. Kolaskirr. Confirm illegal soul-bond termination!"

Groshnik, without a word, turned his obsidian gaze from Vespera to me, his skeletal fingers extending towards my head.  A wave of cold, ethereal energy washed over me as his claws brushed my temples, far colder than Vespera’s electric touch.

“Hmmmm,” the Psychopomp hummed, a low, resonant sound that vibrated in the air. He tilted his head, his gaze shifting between Vespera and me, as if comparing astral blueprints.  “Intriguing. Yes.”

He withdrew his hands, turning back to Justice Nova, his voice gaining a new edge of gravity.  “Justice Nova, Vespera speaks truth. I observe a... fragmented… violently severed soul bond.  The severance is recent. The bond is still present in this... boy but has been clearly and visibly disrupted from Lady Simmi's end. The disruption was done by another Psychopomp.”

Vespera clicked her talons together, a sharp, decisive sound like a gunshot. “Unsuccessful heir-cide attempt and illegal soul-bond termination! Thornheart, you have everything, ye?”

“I do, my Lady,” Thornheart replied, radiating professional satisfaction. He tapped the stack of documents on the desk.  “Psychopomp Kolaskirr’s documented assessment, coupled with the existing legal framework and Lady Vespera’s testimony, provides ample grounds for immediate legal action!"

Vespera grinned at Justice Nova.

“Attempted heir-cide and soul-bond interference…" Justice Nova shook his dark gray head. "Truly, I did not think that Lord Ceter would stoop so low."

“Indeed, Justice Nova,” Thornheart nodded, his voice smooth as polished steel. “These are Class-1 Corporate felonies, carrying severe penalties."

"As the Prima-Heir of SimmiTech, I hereby declare my right of Prima-Succession under the Emergency Preservation Protocol and request Cradlefall's Justice's approval for permission of an immediate retaliation!" Vespera announced.

"Ah," Attorney Thornheart smiled. "Well then, isn't that convenient. I've the paperwork for this declaration… right here."

He slid the paperwork to the Justice. "Please sign, if you permit retaliation.”

Justice Nova studied the documents carefully.

"This is quite serious," he said, tapping his dark gray claw on the papers. "You understand what you're asking for, Miss Simmi? Once I sign this, there's no going back. You're effectively declaring war against your father."

"I understand perfectly," Vespera nodded. "My father tried to murder me. He violated my soul bond and attempted to erase everything that makes me... me. Retaliation is in order!"

"And you're prepared for the consequences of filing this declaration Miss Simmi?" Justice Nova pressed.

Vespera pointed at the monstrous Corpse Seeker hanging outside the office window with a claw with a devious grin. "Justice, Meet Miss Possible Consequences."

"Is she of sound body and mind?" Justice turned to the Psychopomp.

"She is," the lanky Omnid nodded. "The damage is extensive, but it is healing. Miss Simmi has truly incredible mental fortitude, one of the strongest minds I've seen."

"I see," Nathaniel said finally, signing the documents. "Then, as Justice of Cradlefall, I hereby authorize your Prima-Succession claim and right of retaliation!"

"Thank you," Vespera grinned as she grabbed the documents offered by the lawyer and added her own signature. "Now, if you'll excuse us, we have some corporate restructuring to attend to!"

"Kids these days! So full of vigor!" Attorney Thornheart shook his head with a smile as Vespera grabbed us both and pulled us back into the crystalline tunnel.

"Yeah," the Justice let out. "The new generation definitely has some spunk." He paused. "I am… proud of you, daughter. You have chosen well.” He seemed to add as an afterthought directed at the Quetzi-girl at our side.

Cinder froze, nearly tripping over the crystalline step, not expecting the praise.

“Urm,” she let out. “Thanks… dad.”