Scientific Sorcery 52 : The Immovable Man

“What?” Cali hissed back to me. “How is he still alive… Why didn’t the Word unmake him? Explode him again, Ioan! Before he finds out where we are…”

“Clever, clever,” Jarl Bobliss shook his head, his voice calm but somehow carrying itself across all of Svalbard as if every inflection of his tongue made the air itself vibrate. “But not as clever as I. Those were good men that died. You will pay for that, witch.”

He began to advance toward us, walking slowly as more blood seeped across the ruins, rejoining his body, adding to his muscle mass and height.

My lips spoke on their own accord as I stared at the fractal tattoo on the Jarl's cest. "I'm not a God, Cali. I'm just... a boy from Svalbard, imbued with knowledge given to me by River Glinka. Stormy is just a kitten, not an Elder Wyrm."

“Godara’s tits, Ioan,” Cali choked, shaking me. “I don't give a shit what you two are right now! You can explode him again… can’t you? Liquefy the ground? Make the river swallow him! Do something before he gets here!!!”

Her words finally shook me out of my Skeletor-vision stupor.

It was time for plan b.

I pulled out the arbalest from my side and set its arrow on fire, pointing it at Glinka’s megalith.

Jarl Bobliss wasn’t a Jotun yet. He didn't care if I was staring at him. He calmly walked across the ruins of town, stretching his reformed muscles and likewise, calmly entered the frigid river current.

In a minute he was on the other side, approaching Glinka’s megalith.

“Do you think that a mere fire-tipped arrow will stop me?” He laughed, instantly spotting me at the top of the cliff. “Go on, show me what you’ve got, boy. I’d love to see exactly how you’ve managed to drag off two of my Master’s minions all the way to the North Sea!"

Time slowed again as I pressed the trigger, releasing the arrow at Glinka’s megalith. It struck a small container of gunpowder inside of which sat Cali’s lavalier. The container exploded inside the sand right beneath Glinka’s column, making the entire stone shudder.

Glinka, who was previously calmly sitting atop of her megalith leapt up looking left and right in outrage. Then she spotted Jarl Bobliss and sensed the lavalier pulsing under her.

“Ah,” Bobliss said. “A river spirit living in a rock. How cute. Greetings Goddess Glinka, I am Jarl Bobliss and I bring your death."

Glinka raised a hand into the air, the river roaring from both sides of her, heading towards Bobliss.

Bobliss swung his sword at the megalith. The blood-blade sliced right through the Astral-imprint of Ginka, cleaving her in half and struck the stone beneath with a deafening crack.

Glinka’s megalith groaned and split in half. The river Spirit reformed atop of the biggest piece of rock. Filled with absolute fury she swung her first again.

Bobliss struck the rock again, splitting it and the river spirit one more time.

Glinka appeared again, this time slightly dimmer, atop of the other large piece of her megalith.

“Let me guess,” Bobliss said. “The witch-boy made a pact with you? What did he give up? Half of his pitiful life? All of his dreams? A pity that was all for naught, because unlike Jotuns, I cannot be stopped by running water.”

The blood sword reformed into a massive hammer and Bobliss struck the megalith, obliterating it into small rocks that flew like shrapnel all around with a deafening crack.

Glinka flashed above her remaining two megalith pieces, looking distraught, her gestures looking desperate now. She swung a hand and a large watery hand came out of the river, grabbing at Bobliss. The water-hand that did so well against Cali's sleigh and the jotuns went right through the Jarl of Bernt, as if it was simply unable to pick him off the ground.

“Some heroes can fly,” Bobliss commented. “I cannot be moved from where I stand.”

I pressed the remote, liquefying the ground right beneath Bobliss. It didn’t do anything to the man, but it managed to submerge half of Glinka’s unsmashed megalith piece in it.

Bobliss looked down, simply hovering right above the liquid mire that worked so well against Cali.

“A basic witch-trick,” he yawned. “What’s next?”

He casually swung his blood hammer, obliterating the 2nd piece of the megalith.

“One more piece left,” he said with a grin. “Then you’ll be undone, Glinka. Any last words, river goddess?”

Glinka, now hovering atop of her half-submerged, mostly shattered megalith fell to her knees, hands together in an expression of begging.

“Oh? What’s this?” Bobliss laughed. “Begging for your life, are we? I do wonder what happens to river spirits after death. I very much doubt that they end up in Zal-Slavi!"

I could not lose Glinka, could not watch as my best resource in this world was simply destroyed, hammered to bits. Time slowed its crawl as I threw myself off the cliff, knell-blade aimed at Bobliss.

He simply swatted me aside, sending me flying. I lost the dragonglass sword, smashed into the cliffside, feeling as my backpack tore partially and my spine shattered from the impact. Red circles swam inside of my eyes as I slumped into the rocky ground.

“Now who shall I break first?” Bobliss tapped his chin with his hammer. “The witch-boy or the river? Hrm. hrm. Decisions, decisions.”

“L-le-leave Glinka alone,” I choked, feeling as blood poured from my body staining the ground around me, my vision fading in and out.

“Oh? A witch-boy in love with a river?” Bobliss laughed. “How quaint. You know, I thought that you would run. It was hoping to see how far North your horses and legs would take you. A shame you stayed here in Svalbard, taking half fun out of my hunt.”

I looked at Glinka. She was still on her knees, broken and begging. It looked like tears were running down her cheeks, her entire body trembling.

"You see Ioan," Bobliss said, pointing at the broken megalith. "I know exactly how to kill witches and river spirits. A river goddess isn't just water, it's a magic anchor. Smash the anchor and free all of the souls bound to it. When the hammer comes down, thousands of drowned souls will be released all at once. Everything that sustains Glinka's existence will cease!"

I didn't say anything to his chatting, in too much pain to move.

“I know how to make this mundane affair slightly more entertaining,” Bobliss smirked. “Why don’t I close my eyes for ten seconds and you can do whatever you want to me. Sounds fair?”

“Ten,” he began, closing his eyes and smiling wide. “Nine.”

I swallowed.

“I suggest you crawl that broken body to the river, boy,” he commented, without opening his eyes. “Touch the water, offer your magic and life to the river goddess Glinka. Beg her for a… solution, for more power to stop me, for strength to spare your companions."

I thought about reaching the river, about making one last desperate wish, about selling something to Glinka in exchange for power. I didn’t know what to ask for. All of my weapons had failed me, my rationality and scientific knowledge utterly useless in the face of a genuinely immortal Champion.

Through blood-covered eyes I saw that Cali was standing atop of the cliff, Stormy on her shoulder, her eyes wide with pure terror.

“Eight,” Bobliss said. “Seven. Go on witch-boy, crawl to the river. I want to see what powers you’ll be able to buy from the river. Crawl and beg because if you don’t, I’ll unmake that Arcanicx girlfriend of yours, peel her flesh from her bodies, pop her eyes, break her fingers one by one... all while keeping her alive. Spill your blood and make your final wish to the river!”

I swallowed. Feeling in my pocket I realized that my earth-liquefying remote was cracked, the button turned off, the ground beneath the Jarl now solid.

“Six,” Bobliss counted painfully slowly, giving me a chance to challenge the invincible, immovable man. “Five.”

I began to crawl towards the water, blood thrumming in my ears.

I didn't see as Cali rushed from the cliff, leaping away from it.

What I saw was how her body smashed into the rocky edge of the river right in front of me. She landed poorly and something vital in her broke on impact with the rocks. The front half of her body sunk into the river, blood seeping away into the boiling current as she whisper-exhaled something incomprehensible in Castian.

Shit. Why'd she do that.

“Four,” Bobliss laughed, looming above us like an angel of death.

Cali’s body twitched, as if held up by invisible strings. She rose, standing in front of me, holding onto her lavalier in her left hand and the knell-blade in her right.

“Stop,” she ordered, blue threads pouring from the lavalier to paw at the Jarl.

“Really, Sorceress of the South?” Bobliss opened his eyes. “Do you think that you can command me with that trinket? Sorry to break it to ya - it doesn't work on me."

His hand flew through the air with a sonic boom ripping the lavalier from her left hand. Cali yelped as she fell back into the river and then rose again, in the same unnatural manner. Through one of the intact lenses of my Astralscope I saw green-blue threads heading from Glinka’s megalith supporting Cali’s body.

The Arcanicx had made a wish on Glinka, sacrificed something to protect me. Her magic? Her life? Her memories? What did she give up?!

Lightning struck Bobliss from the lavalier as he squeezed it in his fingers, laughing.

“For my Champion!” Cali thrust the dragonglass blade forward, striking it deep into Bobliss’s chest.

“Ouch,” Bobliss said, looking at the Knell-blade. “That… kind of hurt. A pity for you that I don’t have a heart to stab through. Just give me a moment to deal with this… pretty necklace and I’ll get to you.”

The monstrous man squeezed harder and the lavalier shimmered and cracked, the Star-Shard gemstones on it popping one by one.

“Wh-wheres’s your heart?” I ground out, fighting back an ocean of pain.

“My heart is inside an egg, the egg is in a duck, the duck is in a hare, the hare is in a chest and the chest… well, that would be spoiling it,” Bobliss smirked.

He squeezed harder and the central gem in Cali’s lavalier shattered, the thrashing jewelry piece stilling.

Cali pulled the knell blade from Bobliss’s chest and tried to stab his face, but the man was faster. He simply moved his head aside, trusting his right hand forward. His fist went right through Cali’s chest.

Cali fell backwards, a massive hole in her chest. I watched as Bobliss held her heart above me. He squeezed hard and crushed her heart, making Cali’s blood rain down on the remnant of the megalith.

“You…” I choked out.

“Don’t worry,” Bobliss said with a nonchalant look, his eyes filled with pulsating darkness. “Her body will be fed to Chernobog, turned into another Gygr. She did just as my Master predicted she would, sacrificed all of her life and magic for you. Let it be done. Let all of thy power flow into the corpse you wield."

Bobliss swung his blood hammer, obliterating the remainder of Glinka’s column. Glinka’s avatar fell apart into radiant shears with a silent cry.

“There,” Bobliss said. “The final stroke is made, the loop is complete."

“Why…” I hissed.

“All part of the ritual, I’m afraid,” Bobliss revealed. “All part of the plan. No more megalith. Every drowned soul belonging to Glinka is thus henceforth bound to the undead, heartless, reanimated corpse of Callista Liesl. Together, the river spirit and the Sorceress will make a perfect, new Gygr, one who will serve our Master for all eternity, one that will wash away the glaciers.”

I blinked tears of blood from my eyes. Threads of vibrating, folding darkness were dancing around Bobliss, emerging from the tattoo on his chest, reaching out to me like the feet of a giant black spider.

“You and Yaga Grandhilda have both been played for fools, mere pieces in our game,” Bobliss said with a chiding tone. “In the end, it made no difference whether you became a hero or a witch. Our goal was always to kill river Glinka, to bind its spirit to the body of a Felix Arcanicx who was doomed to fall in love with a Nordstaii boy and to sacrifice everything in her young, noble folly. Farewell, Ioan Starfall. May the halls of Zal-Slavi welcome you into their embrace, the last Champion of Svalbard. You have fought well today.”

I watched as Bobliss raised his blood-hammer for one last time, ready to smash my head in.