AMA: Model Behaviour; Book 4
Added 2024-12-10 05:37:06 +0000 UTCThis is the fourth book in the Novelized version AMA: The Boyfriend, and the final book of Arc 1. It contains Ch 248-338. There have been a few minor content changes to make the content work better in larger chapter, along with cleaning up some previously missed minor grammar/spelling errors. A 'What Happened Last Time' and a 'New Book, Who Dis?' segment have been added as well.
Sitting at 116k words, this file is too big to post directly here on Patreon, so it will only be accessible via the file uploads.
As with the previous books, if you see anything that all that you think may have slipped through the cracks for spelling, grammar or continuity, please let me know!
Cheers,
~Break.
Comments
Yaaaas, nitpick it to deeaath! This is super helpful!
BreaktheBar
2025-01-08 04:27:02 +0000 UTCTaking you at your word that you like the nitpicks: P. 2 - “dog house” -> “doghouse” P. 7 - “excentric” -> “eccentric” P. 10 - “complimentary” -> “complementary” P. 16 - “it’s fuzzy little tuft” -> “its fuzzy little tuft” P. 21 - “be she cared” -> “because she cared” P. 29 - “Your threats could use some work” -> No notes. I just love this whole exchange. P. 50 - “there were tits” -> “there weren’t tits”. I’d also change that comma to a colon. P. 53 - “Neither of them were” -> “Neither of them was” P. 65 - “almost more importantly” -> “even more importantly”. Up to you, but it seems to me Cattie’s wishes would be more important thing to Robbie P. 73 - “outfit and mak and” -> “outfit and makeup and” P. 78 - “going through a ringer” -> “going through a wringer” P. 82 - “thumb’s up” -> “thumbs up” P. 83 - “pusy” -> “pussy”. Or “vajayjay”. Your call. P. 85 - “the presence of mind enough” -> “presence of mind enough” or “enough presence of mind” or “the presence of mind” P. 87 - “it’s all-seeing eye” -> “its all-seeing eye” P. 97 - “desperately make it work” -> “desperately [want or try] to make it work” P. 97 - “Not twe” -> “Not that we” P. 100 - “need to about” -> “need to [worry?] about” P. 105 - “momen” -> “moment” P. 118 - “crucible” -> “catalyst”? P. 123 - “hippy” -> “hippie”. A hippie is a ‘60s flower child. Hippy means you’re rocking a Pixar Mom bod P. 143 - “at Becca and I” -> “at Becca and me” P. 160 - “Flaterer” -> “Flatterer” P. 172 - “Mr Creative” -> “Mr. Creative” P. 178 - “if fucked her” -> “if he fucked her” P. 184 - “breath” -> “breathe” P. 190 - “floor.” -> “floor,” P. 192 - “with Cass and I” -> “with Cass and me” P. 214 - “breath” -> “breathe” P. 214 - “circumspect” -> “suspect” P. 237 - “downpayment” -> “down payment” P. 245 - “She knew that she” -> “She knew that while she”. Lots of ways to fix this run-on sentence. P. 245 - “and fucks him” -> “and fucks her” P. 246 - “her’s” -> “hers” P. 289 - “coue of days” -> “couple of days” P. 291 - “Raincheck” -> “Rain check”.Or cheque, I suppose, if you must P. 314 - “super hero” -> “superhero” P. 322 - “so much more l than mine” -> “so much more [full???] than mine” P. 325 - “of Cassidy and I” -> “of Cassidy and me” P. 331 - “Glady” -> “Gladly” You should also decide if you want the nicknames (sugar, sunshine, etc.) capitalized and stick with it.
GWJ
2025-01-07 15:42:37 +0000 UTC
