Frieren 73

Title: From the Start, I Shouldn’t Have Interacted with Humans

The little girl clung tightly to the edge of Ash’s clothes. Her fingertips even turned white from gripping so hard, as if… she were holding onto the last anchor in her life.

Ash looked at those pale little fingers. Combined with her earlier words, he felt as though the child was silently pleading through her actions: Don’t leave me. I’ll change, I really will.

Though Ash genuinely didn’t understand why Fern was apologizing, he just looked down at her small hands, sinking into confusion.

The atmosphere around them seemed to freeze. Time felt agonizingly slow.

His gaze, initially full of confusion, gradually softened. Those complex feelings turned into affection and tenderness.

His heart felt pulled by an irresistible force. It made Ash gently stroke Fern’s soft hair. His other hand carefully wiped the tears streaming from the corners of her eyes. He spoke in the softest, warmest tone possible: “I understand how you feel… Though I really want to agree, that wouldn’t be responsible for you or me. After all, this is a big deal for both of us. So, before I hand you over to a more suitable family, let’s talk first?”

“Talk… talk… talk…?” Fern’s words were broken by sobs, but her mind quickly grasped his meaning. She shook her head forcefully as she understood, her voice firm yet trembling: “No!… I don’t want to talk!”

“Listen to me, Fern. I—”

“No! Don’t… don’t!”

“…Really?”

For Fern, who always acted mature, this was the first time she spoke so childishly. But it made Ash realize, in his confusion, that words might no longer hold meaning.

Perhaps, as people say, the more rational and repressed someone is in daily life, the harder it is for them to control themselves when they lose it.

For someone like Fern, who had suppressed her emotions for so long, when they reached a breaking point, they erupted with intense emotional responses.

Unless Ash agreed to her plea, words alone would be useless, as someone in her state wouldn’t choose to negotiate.

Communication had only two paths—success or total failure.

But Ash didn’t want to lie, nor did he want to face the risks of lying.

Or rather, he wanted to avoid, as much as possible, negotiating after a lie, because if it failed, Fern would be hurt a second time.

After all, if he agreed now and later changed his mind… he feared this child would hate him.

So, seeing the crying child clinging to him, her emotions out of control, he hugged her tightly.

Gently, Ash let her trembling body lean against his chest. He patted her back without a word, hoping his actions could calm her—like the first night they met.

In this silent embrace, time seemed to lose meaning. Her sobs gradually quieted. All that remained were their heartbeats and breaths.

Fern’s tears slowly stopped, but her small hands tightly hugged Ash’s waist, as if afraid that letting go would mean losing this warmth and anchor.

Ash didn’t let go either. He gently held the fragile girl, as if afraid too much force would break her.

◆━⊰✧⊱━◆

Though he left the room, he didn’t go far. Heiter, hiding outside the window, silently observed their actions.

Even he could feel that everything around seemed to lose color. In this fleeting silence, a genuine emotional bond formed, but…

“…No way Ash would agree so easily, right?” Just as he understood Frieren, Heiter knew Ash well.

Though Ash never revealed who he truly was, Heiter could tell he wasn’t human. At the very least, no human could live so long, with a body that didn’t age, even growing stronger.

For beings who live so long, accepting a human child… was indeed very difficult.

So, he couldn’t fully blame Ash. It was, after all, one way to avoid prolonged pain. But…

“…That child really wants to stay with you. She’s so mature it hurts to see.”

Heiter turned his gaze from the window, unable to hold back a long sigh.

If he were ten years younger, or if Fern hadn’t met Ash, he felt that, despite being ill-suited, he’d force himself to adopt her.

But as long as there was even one reliable person, he couldn’t take her in.

His age didn’t allow it. He… was over a hundred years old.

At his age, he even had to worry whether he’d wake up after sleeping. If no one found him, would his body rot in bed?

Though it sounded grim, this was the objective reality he faced as an old man living alone.

So, even if Ash was utterly irresponsible and left, Heiter would have to find a way to care for Fern. Otherwise… how could this child survive alone?

Initially, he hadn’t planned to meddle too much. But he genuinely pitied Fern, so he intervened a bit. And—he planned to intervene again.

◆━⊰✧⊱━◆

After waiting a long time, Fern cried herself to exhaustion and fell asleep. Ash carried her to his bed. Only then did he return to the room.

Since Fern didn’t let go of his hand even in sleep, Ash now only stared at the open drawer from a distance. He quickly shifted his gaze to Heiter, who walked slowly without his cane to avoid noise, and asked suspiciously: “Heiter, did you open that drawer?”

“…Suddenly suspecting your own friend? Maybe you forgot to lock it?” Heiter looked surprised.

On his aged face, there was even a hint of guilt.

But Ash stared at him coldly, not feeling sorry for the old man, and said icily: “Don’t pretend. Do I not know you?”

“Haaa… I never expected, at the end of my life, I’d clash with a close friend.” Heiter looked as if life had no meaning, shaking his head with hands behind his back.

His feigned attitude made Ash barely restrain himself from wanting to hit him.

But he stroked Fern’s hair as she lay on his lap, tears at the corners of her eyes, sleeping soundly. Ash tried hard to let out a long sigh, as if expelling all his emotions into the air, before calming down: “…If I just forgot to lock it, this kid wouldn’t have opened it. Someone must’ve unlocked it and shown those names…”

“You really know Fern.”

“…Whether I want to or not, I’ve known her for over a year. I can probably understand her.”

“Is that so?” Heiter nodded with a smile.

This attitude made Ash want to throw something at him: “You caused me trouble for no reason. Why are you acting like this??”

“Ouch~ sorry. Haha~ haha~”

Before this conversation, Heiter had been clear about his plan. Now, he smiled, reaffirming his goal. He turned, left the room again, and closed the door for him.

(What’s with this guy all of a sudden?)

Ash stared at the door in confusion for a moment. Only then did he lower his head again in frustration, looking at the little girl lying sideways on his lap. He sighed long while stroking her hair: “Raising a kid is more troublesome than I imagined. It seems, from the start, I shouldn’t have interacted with humans…”

But now, it seemed a bit late for regrets. And Ash didn’t even realize that he, too, was once human. It’s just… his time as a demon far outweighed his time as a human.

◆━⊰✧⊱━◆

The next morning.

Fern woke up and found Ash lying beside her. But looking closer, she realized… she was the one sleeping in his room.

Memories from last night flooded her mind. It made her nose sting, and she could barely hold back the surging emotions.

But she still tidied the clothes she hadn’t changed from the night before. She got out of bed carefully and went to the courtyard to fetch water.

In the fenceless courtyard, the soft morning light caressed her skin, offering gentle warmth. Birds chirped in the surrounding trees, like a hug from nature… everything was so calm and peaceful.

But recalling what happened last night, Fern’s face grew slightly somber. Because, in the end, Ash hadn’t agreed to her plea.

As if it were all fated, just thinking about having to discuss it again later made her heart feel heavy.

The wooden bucket’s handle, which she accidentally filled too full, hurt her fingers. But she didn’t pour out some water as usual. She gritted her teeth and walked forward slowly, wanting to help Ash prepare morning water, as always.

…In truth, Fern wasn’t the only one feeling heavy. Ash, who woke when she did, felt the same.

Just thinking about having to talk again made his stomach ache.

Before this, he’d never imagined that temporarily caring for a child would make him so conflicted.

But seeing through the window crack—the little girl, her small body swaying with the water in the bucket, the water soaking her feet and skirt—Ash couldn’t help sighing. He tidied his clothes and left the room.