Frieren 72

Title: Fern: I Don’t Want to Be Someone Else’s Child

Though Ash and Heiter tried hard to keep Fern from discovering their true intentions, they kept bringing people who wanted to adopt a child under the guise of inviting guests to visit. They also indirectly asked Fern about her feelings toward them and their feelings toward her.

Though they thought they hid it well, they underestimated Fern’s sensitivity as a street child.

Or rather… the way those people looked at Fern made her feel they weren’t seeing her as a friend’s child.

But the main point was, when Ash and Heiter went to the Holy Capital together, Fern, staying behind to clean the house, suddenly noticed… the drawer in the guest room Ash used was slightly open.

“…Did Ash-sama forget to close the drawer?”

The specially locked drawer was always shut. Seeing it open today made Fern unable to resist glancing at it twice out of curiosity.

Initially, she planned to close it immediately, but… she accidentally saw something and couldn’t look away.

Because in those documents, she saw the names of previous guests.

Driven by curiosity, she quietly took them and found they were detailed records about those guests.

Why would friends visiting need such deliberate investigation? Especially their character, family members, and financial status? And most crucially, their attitude toward children.

“This… what is this? N-no… why… could it be? There must, must be a mistake!”

Though Fern always tried not to think in that direction, now, faced with key evidence, the answer she’d been avoiding surfaced in her mind.

The world around her seemed to lose color and sound. All that remained was her rapid, ragged breathing and the indescribable anxiety in her heart.

Her mind went blank. As her pupils widened unconsciously, the documents slipped one by one from her trembling hands, scattering on the floor—like her shattered heart at that moment.

“Ah… no… it can’t be like this. I have to tidy up… if the documents are messy… Ash-sama will be angry… no. Ash-sama has never, not even once… been angry with me… W-what’s wrong?”

Fern crouched on the floor, wanting to pick up the documents, but for some reason, her vision suddenly blurred. She tried hard to hold it back, but her tears kept flowing.

“I-it’s strange… my tears… why won’t they stop… I can’t see clearly… what should I do… Ash-sama will be back soon…”

She couldn’t wipe her tears dry. She wanted to calm down, but her throat let out sobs several times. Her tears kept streaming.

Her chest felt gripped tightly by an invisible hand. A sudden piercing pain made her collapse to the floor. She instinctively clutched her chest with both hands, as if that could ease the pain.

Her usually expressionless face was now distorted. In the end…

This mature yet still young girl finally drowned in a flood of emotions. She could only cover her face with both hands, trying her best not to make a sound.

But all her emotions were uncontrollable. They turned into silent wails, escaping through her fingers, echoing in the empty room.

◆━⊰✧⊱━◆

Ash and Heiter had been scouring the Holy Capital again, searching for a suitable person. On their umpteenth selection trip, Heiter had actually given up on finding someone suitable.

Not just because Ash’s requirements were too strict, but also because Fern had no intention of leaving Ash…

(Why doesn’t this guy realize that the kid doesn’t want to leave him?)

Heiter felt utterly helpless about the situation.

But after spending time with them, he also understood he couldn’t entirely blame Ash.

Ash was indeed busy with many things. On the other hand, Fern’s personality was too reserved. She wouldn’t say anything… but she thought too much about others and maintained a distance no child should have. This would confuse anyone.

The two involved didn’t fully understand each other’s thoughts. Meanwhile, Heiter, as an elder observing from the sidelines… saw it all.

Amid this tug-of-war, he couldn’t stand it anymore. He also wanted to give Fern a chance. So—he quietly unlocked Ash’s drawer with a spare key before they left.

Thus, this time, he didn’t wander too long with Ash in the Holy Capital. He claimed to feel unwell, urging him to return quickly and not trouble an old man like him.

Though Ash still wanted to keep searching, he was also worried Heiter might genuinely be unwell. He could only compromise and return temporarily.

But… as he pushed open the slightly ajar door, he didn’t expect to hear the stifled sobs of the child in the living room.

“What’s wrong? Did she fall or… no, no.”

Aside from the first night they met, Fern had never cried. Remembering this, Ash immediately placed his hand on his sword’s hilt and rushed into the room…

But the situation he imagined didn’t happen.

All he saw was a small child collapsed on the floor, hands covering her face, trying to hide all her suffering and sadness. Her tiny body kept trembling.

Beneath her, documents were scattered. The drawer beside her was wide open.

(Did I forget to close it?)

Ash was a bit puzzled. He couldn’t help glancing at Heiter for help.

But Heiter, as if not seeing him, turned with a faint smile and left, closing the door behind him.

This made Ash look at the child on the floor, hesitating briefly. He crouched beside Fern, stroking her hair, trying hard to calm her: “What’s wrong, Fern? Uh, I mean… well, how do I put this?”

Honestly, he was a bit at a loss for what to say. Ash suddenly couldn’t think of the right words.

But Fern’s small body trembled at his touch. She finally noticed his presence. Wiping her tears with one hand and clutching his sleeve with the other, she kept crying and apologizing: “S-sorry! This… it’s my fault… sorry… it’s all my fault… I was wrong, so… sorry…”

She sobbed, her voice small and trembling. Her eyes were filled with helplessness, even fear.

This made Ash panic instantly: “No, why are you apologizing? You didn’t do anything bad, right? Sweetie, don’t cry anymore. I’ll buy you anything you want?”

“N-no! I… I… don’t want to be someone else’s child…!”

Though each word seemed to take all her strength, Fern even gave up wiping her tears. Both her small hands clung tightly to Ash’s sleeve.