Frieren 70

Title: Heiter: Be a Little Human!

Heiter’s retirement home was a typical Western-style cottage.

Though called small, it wasn’t actually that small. It seemed to have at least three or four rooms on the first floor.

While not luxurious, it wasn’t dilapidated either. It stood with simple charm. Vines climbed its walls, and there was a small attic on the second floor.

In front of the door was a standalone well, and a simple vegetable garden was nearby. In this autumn harvest season, Ash couldn’t resist lingering before knocking.

Without waiting for Fern to stop him, he plucked a tomato, wiped it, and took a bite.

Seeing this, Fern’s face filled with worry: “Ash-sama, picking and eating it like that isn’t good, is it? It’ll surely make the owner angry…”

“It’s fine. He won’t care… Though I prefer cooked tomatoes, like tomato scrambled eggs.”

“Then don’t pick it in the first place…” Fern looked slightly anxious about his behavior.

“What are you talking about, Fern? If a friend grows vegetables, of course I have to taste them right away! Hmm, maybe it tastes like that?”

“…Sorry, I don’t understand at all.”

“It’s okay. You’ll get it when you’re older.”

“…Really?” Fern nodded half-believingly, but she glanced at the suitcase in their hands and couldn’t help saying: “But Ash-sama, compared to that, we didn’t even bring a gift or anything. Is it okay to visit like this…?”

“A gift?”

“What’s wrong?”

Fern looked up in confusion.

Ash, playing with his tomato, muttered to himself: “…Strange. I never taught you troublesome etiquette like that, did I?”

“It’s very common sense.” Fern instinctively emphasized her tone, adding: “Even a seven-year-old like me understands.”

“No, it’s normal not to understand.”

Ash felt helpless with this overly mature child. He ruffled her hair.

But it wouldn’t be good to say something to her. So, he handed her the half-eaten tomato.

“T-this?”

Fern took it instinctively, wanting to ask what to do with it. But before she could get an answer, Ash was already back at the cottage, casually knocking: “Heiter~ Heiter! I’m here to hang out. Open the door quick!”

“…Yeah, yeah, I’m coming.”

Footsteps sounded from inside, accompanied by an aged voice.

An old man holding a cane and walking slowly soon opened the door. Seeing Ash, his eyes widened, and he showed a nostalgic smile: “I thought I misheard… I really didn’t expect you’d come looking for me.”

“Yeah~ got some things to discuss.”

“Haha, didn’t you just say you came to hang out?” Heiter smiled and shook his head. Not caring much about his purpose, he stepped aside: “Anyway… come in first?”

“Then I won’t hold back!”

“When have you ever held back with me?”

“Fair point.” Ash smiled too but didn’t enter. He turned to the little girl still by the vegetable garden, staring worriedly at the tomato: “Fern, don’t eat the tomato. Come inside.”

“Yes! I’m coming.” Fern startled, quickly running over but stopping in front of Heiter, bowing politely: “Pleased to meet you, Heiter-sama. I’ve always heard about you from Ash-sama.”

“Wow, such a sweet child. Nothing like you.” Heiter crouched with a laugh, giving Fern a kind smile.

But seeing the bitten tomato in her hand, he turned to Ash, shaking his head: “…This shameless attitude, you taught her, didn’t you?”

“Uh, t-this…” Fern looked at the tomato, then at Ash, feeling awkward but still bowing honestly to Heiter, apologizing guiltily: “S-sorry!… I took the tomato myself.”

“Huh? Oh… it’s fine, it’s fine. Just kidding. If you want to eat anything, pick it, no need to be shy.”

Heiter smiled in surprise, waving his hand. He looked at Ash again jokingly: “I take it back, this child’s nothing like you. She’s a polite, good kid.”

“Um… actually, I was going to say…”

“What?”

“The tomato… I actually picked it, and since it didn’t taste good, I gave it to Fern.” Ash felt bad letting the child take the blame, so after hesitating, he told the truth.

This froze Heiter’s expression. After a moment, he couldn’t hold back, breaking his kind elderly demeanor, and scolded loudly: “Please be a little human! How dare you let a child take the blame for your mistake?!”

“No… you misunderstood, okay?”

“—The kid said it herself!” Heiter retorted passionately. Ash realized and thought: “Seems like it?”

“It’s definitely your fault!”

“No, no, no. That’s a big misunderstanding. I never asked her to do that, let alone trained her to.” Ash raised his hands innocently. But despite his words, Heiter didn’t believe him: “How could a normal kid like that take responsibility for someone else?”

“Maybe she was influenced by my noble morality and became a good kid on her own.”

“No way! It’s definitely… cough!… cough, cough!!”

“Whoa, look at you. Why so worked up? Calm down.”

“You… cough… you think… cough, cough! Whose fault is this…!”

Heiter, scolding him passionately until he nearly couldn’t breathe and died, kept hitting his chest to regulate his breathing. His eyes, looking at Ash, were full of frustration.

But Ash showed an innocent expression, still patting his back, afraid he’d actually die.

From Fern’s perspective, she was a bit confused—were their relationship good or not?

◆━⊰✧⊱━◆

After entering and sitting at a very simple wooden dining table, Heiter still hadn’t fully recovered.

He propped his forehead with one hand, calming himself for a while. Then he shook his head and sighed: “I’ve been a bishop for years, pretending to be calm for years, and you ruined it…”

“So you were just pretending to be good?”

“…Look at you. What are you saying to an old man? It’s normal to be like this when you’re old. Who’s like you?”

“Is that so?”

“Though I’d like to say that, actually…” Heiter spoke halfway but glanced at Fern beside Ash, stopping as if worried about something.

“What’s up?”

“Nothing, it’s fine.” Heiter smiled and shook his head. He observed Fern again and asked curiously: “By the way, Fern…? Such a sweet little girl, what a waste being with you~”

“N-not true!” Fern immediately showed her serious little face, retorting strongly: “And… please don’t badmouth Ash-sama!”

“Right! Fern, keep it up. Say good things about this drunken priest!” Ash nodded repeatedly, egging her on.

This made Fern turn to him with a worried expression: “Ash-sama too, Heiter-sama is a bishop, right? So… I think that’s not good.”

“Haha, an interesting kid.” Heiter laughed heartily, like an elder teasing a favorite child. He leaned close to the table, observing her, and asked: “Fern, what’s your relationship with this guy? Is he your father? But from how you call him… doesn’t seem like it?”

“Huh? I… I and Ash-sama?”

The sudden question threw Fern into confusion. She’d thought about this issue for a long time but couldn’t find an answer.

But now, Ash reached out, placed his hand on her head, and said wisely: “Actually, thinking of her as a great-granddaughter or something isn’t bad.”

“Great-granddaughter? When did you get married?” Heiter was slightly shocked.

“No, actually, I want Fern to be your granddaughter.”

“Be my granddaughter… Huh? Wait a second? What do you mean?!”

Ash’s serious words left Heiter momentarily stunned. When he realized, he grabbed his cane nearby.

But Ash casually scooped Fern onto his lap, using her as a shield, making it impossible to hit him. He even gave a wry smile: “Is that how an old man should act? Using a child as a shield?”

“What shield? You’re an adult, why’s your mind so dangerous? I just want to show my affection for you in front of the kid.”

He said it seriously. Ash also ruffled Fern’s hair, smiling: “Right, Fern~?”

“Y-yes.”

Honestly, being used as a comfy shield by two arguing adults made Fern a bit awkward. She didn’t even know what to say.

But she didn’t protest. She just nodded with a sad expression, sitting obediently on Ash’s lap.

This expression made Heiter show a wise look: “Ash, as an old friend, let’s talk alone?”

“What’s up?”

“…Something a bit serious.” Heiter lowered his head, gently adjusting his frameless glasses.

“That’s rare.” Ash didn’t care much, nodding casually and looking at the girl on his lap: “Fern, go play outside for a bit, okay?”

“Okay.” The remarkably understanding Fern nodded immediately upon hearing this. With his help, she got down, ran out, and even thoughtfully closed the door behind her.