One Boy's Journey Chapter 1

Written by Brianna Demonet

Well, it finally happened, I ended up in the hospital on the last day of my freshman year of high school. I was attacked and assaulted while I was about to exit the school and start my summer vacation.

There were four of them. They gave me a swirly (flushing my head face first in the toilet). Then they started kicking me in my crotch, face, legs, and ribs. The whole time calling me faggot, queer, sissy, girly boy and a cocksucker.

My face wasn't as bad because I covered up tightly. My Arms bruised up badly as well. I was so scared I thought they were going to kill me. They only stopped when I went limp.

The janitor, Mr Milford, a retired Army medic and police officer, found me in a bloody pool on the floor. He was a kind, quiet man. He called 911, and the office.

He took pictures of the scene. He treated my wounds and told me help was on the way. He asked me who did it and why. I told him everything and repeated it to the officer who arrived. Mr Milford held me still as the police officer bagged my hands. Mr Milford rode with me to the hospital.

The police called my Mother and told her I was in the hospital. She met me in the emergency room. The doctors told my mother they had to operate. I had a puncture in my left lung and 3 broken ribs. My left knee was dislocated and needed to be set and I had a concussion.

The doctor also said my genitalia was damaged badly. I heard my mother crying as she signed the consent for treatment form. A nurse put a needle in my IV and everything went black.

When I woke up, my mother was there with my Aunt Vanessa. Aunt Vanessa wasn't a blood relative but she was my mom's oldest friend. She lived outside of Las Vegas. Living in rural Ohio like we did, and Vanessa showing up, I knew things were bad.

I knew the other shoe was about to drop. Now, I was really scared. My heart monitor started beeping faster. Mom placed her hand on my forehead and Vanessa held my hand.

Mom.... V, V, Vanessa what happened? How long have I been here?

My mom said, “Sweetie you've been out for 6 days!”

As I became more aware of my surroundings. “Why all the bandages and tubes?” I had two tubes in my crotch and one in each arm.

Vanessa said, “I'll get the doctor.”

“Honey, you were severely beaten. If Mr Milford hadn't found you when he did you may have died. You have been treated for many different trauma injuries to your torso and genitalia. Your nose was also broken too.”

“Ryan, glad to see you up,” said the doctor. “My name is Doctor Yung.”

She was a beautiful Asian woman. She looked a lot like Maggie Q. She was very classy and graceful I noticed immediately.

“I was your trauma surgeon. How are you feeling?”

“Like I was hit by four trucks at the same time,” I said.

“How's your pain level from 1 to 10?”

“A 7, Doctor.”

“Okay, let's have a look at you. Ladies, may I have a few minutes?”

Dr Yung waves in the nurse.

A male nurse walked into my room. He looked similar to one of the guys that beat me. I freaked out! No, no, not him please god, no! Not him! I started shaking desperate to escape.

The nurse left quickly.

Ryan, Ryan, it's okay. It's only the nurse, said Dr Yung.

That nurse looks like one of the guys that attacked me! I was sweating and breathing heavily.

I'm sorry, young man, but a male has to be present when a female examines him.

Please, Doctor, send in a female nurse and let my Mom and Vanessa back, doctor.

Okay, only if it keeps you calm.

My Mom and Vanessa are let back in. Dr. Yung said ladies, Ryan insists you be in here; for his sake, I'm allowing it. Just, please stay out of the way.

Of course doctor! Said Aunt Vanessa.

A female nurse was brought in, and they carefully removed my wraps, inspecting my body. The nurse adds fresh pads under my bandages and wraps.

Thank you, nurse, says Dr Yung.

Doctor, will I be Okay?

You're healing quite well Ryan. We need to talk about the damage you suffered.

As in permanent damage? My Mom asked.

Yes, it's irreparable I'm afraid. Ryan is 13 years old I see?

Yes, Doctor. My Mom answered.

Here is the problem. Ryan's testicles never dropped. With all the blows he suffered at the time, his testicles dropped involuntarily and they were crushed beyond repair.

I'm very sorry Ryan, said Dr. Yung we have an in-house counselor if you need to talk. I highly recommend it. This is a very traumatic event. There's no shame in talking to a therapist.

Thanks, Doctor! I said flatly. It was all I could think to say. I began to cry like a baby.

Mom and Vanessa hugged me as I wailed over and over. They hugged me tightly. It helped. After 30 minutes of tears, I ran out of tears.

Mom, Auntie what am I going to do?

Everything will work out sweetie. Mom said.

Your Mom's right honey. Everything will be alright, said Aunt Vanessa.

How is everything going to be alright? I asked as I started crying again.

Moments later a police detective and counselor enter my room. My name is Detective Smith, and this is our victim's counselor, Mrs Martin. We'd like to ask you a few questions.

Are you up for this Ryan, asked Mrs. Martin.

Yes, I can.

We can come back if you like? Detective Smith said.

No! Please stay,. Ask away I said.

My Mom and Vanessa stay quiet.

Do you remember what happened? Asked the detective.

Yes. I said.

Tell us from the beginning.

I was walking through the hall towards the exit. I was pulled into the bathroom by two of the four guys that always bullied me. Once in the bathroom, there were two more waiting. They grabbed me, lifted me, shoved my head into a toilet, and almost drowned me.

I fought and struggled to get free. I scratched at least one of them. I was all out of the fight after the toilet. They threw me on the floor and started kicking me, calling me faggot, queer, fagboy, sissy boy, and cocksucker. They ran off when I stopped moving.

Do you know their names?

Yes, detective. Billy Bond, Paul Jeffries, and the other two were brothers Tommy and Rick Newhouse.

Did you say anything to them before you were attacked?

No sir.

Did you look at them funny, anything like that at all?

No sir.

Are you sure?

Yes sir.

What are you getting at Detective? Asked Mom!

Nothing, Ma'am, just following procedures, Detective Smith answered.

Detective look at my boy! He's 5' 4" tall and 125 lbs. He's not a fighter or a bully. He's a victim. My Mom said defensively. You can't seriously believe he would attack four boys more than twice his size?

My apologies, ladies; I have to ask to get the full picture.

Would you like to talk to me? Asked Mrs Martin.

Not right now I'm getting very tired. Fair enough, said Mrs Martin.

Here are our cards; if you want to talk or remember any additional details, please call either of us, anytime! Detective Smith said.

We will said, Aunt Vanessa. Thank you, Detective, Thank you, Mrs Martin

Ryan, you can call me anytime, 24/7, to talk said Mrs Martin.

Thank you I said weakly.

As I began to fall asleep, I said I'm sorry Mom.

I drift off to sleep. My sleep is deep. I wake in a cold sweat, alarms blaring everywhere. Mom and Vanessa are being shown out of the room. Momm!!! I cry out Auntie Veee! Nurses are trying to push me down, grabbing my limbs.

Wait God Damn it! I cried. Get your hands off me! Stop touching me. Get off me! Mom!!! Vanessa!!! I screamed.

Then the night shift doctor arrives.

Get your fucking hands off me you bitch! I yelled.

Doctor he flat-lined! Said the nurse.

No, he didn't his leads fell off.

Stop touching me I cried.

Let go of my Nephew! Aunt Vanessa demanded!

We have to restrain him or he'll hurt himself.

No nurse you need to read the chart! Aunt Vanessa demanded.

You're not a doctor! You can't tell me what to do!

On the contrary! Nurse! I'm a board-certified psychiatrist!

Why didn't you say so?

Why didn't you read the chart, or check the leads before trying to zap my nephew with a defibrillator?

My apologies doctor. Said the nurse

Don't apologize to me! Vanessa said.

I'm sorry young man!

Just go, please! I said.

The attending doctor said nothing while the nurse was in the room. The doctor looked at the nurse and nodded his head at her to leave.

Aunt V's taking the lead on things in my room for the moment. If I wasn't in such pain and thinking of my loss and injuries at the moment, I'd smile. My Aunt Vanessa is a badass!

Doctor, has the nursing staff been briefed on Ryan's condition and trauma? Asked Aunt Vanessa.

I will ensure they are! Dr?

Stockton! Dr Vanessa Stockton! Said Aunt V.

Vanessa, should we call Mrs Martin? My Mom asked.

I would, said Vanessa, this incident needs to be reported.

I don't think it's necessary to report the nurse said the doctor.

No doctor that's your call. I want to report the traumatic event my nephew just experienced.

Understood doctor Stockton. Thank you, doctor.

Jones, Dr Jones.

Thank you, Doctor Jones. Vanessa said.

Vee, what did you do? Mom asked.

What I did was call them out on a mistake and let them handle it. They will be giving Ryan first-class care from now on. Mrs Martin showed up within the hour.

I talked for almost 2 straight hours. Mrs Martin recorded everything.

His attention to detail was incredible. His report earlier and the new details from his episode all lined up. Now, all we have to do is nail these bastards. Mrs Martin stated.

With your permission, ladies, I'd like to share this information and incident with Detective Smith.

If you think it gets these bastards behind bars, do it. Mom said.

We're doing everything we can. This will help. That I can promise.

Thank you, Mrs. Martin said, my Mom

The first thing the next morning, Detective Smith walked in with Mrs. Martin and a man in a very nice suit.

Good morning, everyone. Are you up for a chat today? Detective Smith asked.

Sure Detective, I said.

I'd like to introduce the Assistant District Attorney Mr. Summers.

He'll be prosecuting your case.

Mom butts in, does this mean you arrested those thugs?

Yes, Ma'am, we have. We need to show you some pictures for a positive ID. Are you up to that young man? Asked Detective Smith.

Yes sir.

Mom and Vanessa never left my side. I was shown 4 photo arrays with 6 pictures each. I identified all four.

Excellent young man, thank you.

Now what happens? Vanessa. Asked.

Now we can charge them! Mr Summers said.

Are they in custody? Mom asked.

Yes as of last night after Mrs Martin called me, Detective Smith said.

If there's anything my office can do please call. Said DA Summers.

What are you charging them with? Asked Vanessa.

They'll be charged with first-degree assault, mutilation, attempted murder, and a hate crime.

Hate Crime makes it a Federal case, doesn't it? Asked Vanessa.

Yes, it does! DA Summers said.

If they try to fight this or try to deal it down, we can still charge them with a hate crime.

Deal? Asked my Mom. Those animals tried to kill my boy without provocation!

Yes, they did but the boys lawyered up immediately. So we can't talk to them without their Attorney.

Over the next few days, there was a lot of probing and prodding. They took out all my tubes except my IV and catheter. I was feeling better, my pain level was a four now.

The nurse came in and said the doctor ordered testosterone therapy. The nurse injected my IV with a low dose of testosterone. I started getting the shakes in my hands and feet. I was hard to breathe. Aunt V saw it. She mentioned it to my Mom. They asked for Doctor Yung.

When Doctor Yung came to check on me Aunt V and Mom pulled Dr Yung in the hall.

The Hallway Talk.

Dr Yung thank you for checking on Ryan, said Mom.

How's he doing? Asked Dr Yung.

He's getting stronger, said Mom. That's good to hear said Dr Yung.

Doctor, I want to talk to you about the hormone replacement they're treating him with. Said Vanessa.

Everything alright? Asked the doctor.

The testosterone they gave him, gives him the shakes. He was having difficulty breathing.

Really? The doctor checked the dosage on the chart. It's a minimal dose.

Doctor Yung, I'm a doctor too. I am not trying to question the treatment, I understand it's a standard treatment. However, Ryan is having reactions to it. Vanessa said.

If that's true we'll need to find an alternative soon. The boy hasn't hardly started puberty yet. Doctor Yung said.

My point exactly, Dr Yung. There's only one other kind of treatment we can give him. Vanessa said.

What does that mean ladies? Asked Brenda (mom).

Dr Yung explained that if Ryan is reacting to the testosterone replacement with a bare minimal dose, he won't be able to go through puberty. If he doesn't go through puberty he may face serious health risks in the future.

What does that mean? Brenda asked.

It means Ryan will have to transition to a girl. Said Vanessa.

My boy won't become a man?

I'm afraid not Brenda. I'll order a test to confirm it. Said Doctor Yung.

Thank you, doctor. Said Vanessa.

My mom was crying when they walked into my room.

What's wrong? I asked. Am I dying?

No, Ryan, you not dying said Aunt V. They need to run some tests. Aunt Vanessa said with a calm demeanor.

For what? What's wrong, Aunt V? Please, someone tell me what the hell is going on! I demanded.

Mom holds my hand.

Okay, here it is, Aunt Vanessa started. You're having an allergic reaction to the testosterone supplement. Because your body can't produce hormones you need another source to stay healthy and go through puberty.

Another medication I asked?

Of sorts, Ryan. If the test is positive for allergic reaction to testosterone you will have to be given female hormones. Aunt Vanessa said.

My jaw dropped. Will the treatment be temporary? I asked.

No, Ryan, you will have to take them for the rest of your life.

Wait a second you mean I'll become a girl?

My heartbeat speeds up and I get dizzy. I'm, I'm getting dizzy. I passed out asleep.

When I came to the nurse was taking my blood.

Is that for my test? I ask.

Yes, young man. We should have results tomorrow; just rest, Ryan.

Thank you, nurse.

It was after 3 am when I woke up in a cold sweat. My Aunt Vanessa is sleeping in the chair. You alright sweetie. Another night terror, Aunt V. Want to talk?

I tell her about the dream of returning to school in a dress and both boys and girls beating me.

The girls were trying to cut off my breasts, it was awful.

Ryan, you've nothing to worry about. Your Mom and I will keep you safe. I promise you this: I know exactly how you feel, sweetie.

How could you?

I'll explain it another time.

But Aunt V?

Ryan, Have I ever lied to you?

No!

That's right and I'm not about to start, just trust me.

Aunt V calmed me down, and back to sleep, I went. The next morning came and went. No word on the test.

Aunt V and Mom came in with the doctor. Their faces were cold and blank.

Well? I asked.

Ryan, you're allergic to Testosterone. The good news is you have zero adverse effects on estrogen supplements.

So there are no alternatives for testosterone?

Not that you can take it safely, said Doctor Yung.

Ryan. I'm sorry young man. Dr Yung was very kind. If you want reconstructive surgery we can do it this week and have you home in a week to 10 days.

You mean give me a vagina?

Yes, sweetheart said Aunt V.

I'm also a plastic surgeon. If you want surgery we need to do it soon, before you're fully healed. Doctor Yung said.

Won't I look funny without breasts?

HRT will help you grow breasts, round your body, and soften your skin, and face. You won't grow a beard. You won't lose your hair like your deadbeat dad. My Mom said.

What about school?

Your mom and I talked about that honey. We'd like you to consider staying with me.

In Las Vegas, I asked...

Yes Ryan, said Mom. It's a fresh start. You can start school as a girl.

No one has to know.

Are you coming, Mom? No, sweetie, I can't.

I have the Salon and in the current economy, I can't sell it. But I will see you on Facetime, and I'll fly out when I can.

I need some time to process all this.

Of course, said Dr. Yung. Let me know soon, please.

I asked Mom and Aunt V to give me some time. WOW! Thinking to myself. Talk about the other shoe-dropping. First, I lost my balls, and now it looks like I am losing my Mom, too.

It's been Mom and me since I was 3 years old. I loved my dad. He was great; from what I remembered of him. As Bruce Springsteen said, He went for a ride, and he never came back. To this day I haven't seen him.

Now, all this and then moving in with Aunt V? I love Aunt V, but without Mom, it seems scary, especially if I am to transition into a girl. To say I was terrified and apprehensive would be an understatement right now.

My next issue is friends, bullies, and school. I'm a good student but not anything else sports-wise. I loved my gymnastics and Dance classes when I was younger. I took ballet and tap dance. I loved Gregory Hines.

Don't get me wrong Aunt V has been like a second mother and more than the rest of our family. When I was little I spent my spring breaks and 4th of July with her. When I was little, we used to play, mother and daughter sometimes when I was there. She loved it.

She never told me why she couldn't have children, I never really asked. Truth be told I loved the mother-daughter game. But when I turned 11 it just didn't seem right to me.

Aunt V even went as far as to make my bedroom in her condo a girl's room. Aunt V and my Mom had my ears pierced when we visited for Christmas when I was 4.

I tried to think of the advantages of my situation. Less likely boys would bully me, but girls can be super mean. Girls get to wear a lot more clothes and shoes and makeup. Girls can get their ears, belly buttons, and noses pierced. Boys pay for most everything on dates. I wasn't sure about the dating thing with boys, especially not after this incident. I reconciled that I don't have a choice if I want to live a normal life. I paged the nurse and asked her to send in Mom and Aunt V.

Well honey, what did you decide? Asked my Mom. Her tone was soft and caring. Aunt V looked at me with that caring and loving look, I loved when we played together years ago.

I want the surgery. One question!

Yes? Mom asked.

How are we going to pay for it? I asked.

Don't worry; I'll handle all that said, Aunt V!

I have one request. If I do this can I have breast implants?

Implants? Honey, you're 13! Mom exclaimed.

And I'm going to be a girl for the rest of my life, and many girls my age have small breasts.

How big? Asked Aunt V.

Veee! My mom gasped.

Ryan's right adjustment and blending in will be tough enough. Breasts will make it easier. How big are you thinking Ryan? Asked Aunt V.

B-cups? I asked

That's a reasonable size request. Okay, Done! said Aunt V.

Brenda, are you okay with this?

Oh Ryan, my mom sobs. Yes okay.

Aunt V has Dr Yung paged.

I want to do it, Doctor Yung.
That's a good choice, Ryan. You will be able to lead a normal life as a woman. I love being a woman, Ryan! You will too. Dr Yung was smiling in a very kind, caring almost loving manner.

Doctor? I asked. If your son was injured like I am would you suggest this?

Yes, Ryan, I would. When your Aunt and I are done no one will be able to tell.

Thanks, doctor!

You're welcome, Ryan. Ladies you'll have to leave. The nurses will be in to prep him for surgery.

Already! asked Mom. Yes, it's either I do it now or he can wait 6 weeks.

Now please doctor, I said.

Okay! Mom relented.
Dr Stockton let's get scrubbed up!

I'll follow you doc! Vanessa said.

Two female nurses prepped, shaved, and gave me an enema. The one nurse said to me you are one brave young lady. I hope those boys get what's coming to them. I second that said the second nurse.

Thank you for taking care of me. I said. They both smiled.

The first nurse asked have you thought of a name yet?

Rianna, I said.

Like the singer. Said the second nurse.

Close Rianna without the H. I just hope I'll be half as pretty. Rianna, you'll be very pretty with B-cups, rhinoplasty, and a tracheal shave! With your emerald green eyes; you'll be a heartbreaker.

Thank you ladies.

They wheeled in the gurney; the nurses lifted me to the gurney. Mom and Vanessa kissed my cheeks. They tell me they love me I wave to them as I'm rolled down the hallway.

I'm greeted by Doctor Yung and Aunt Vanessa smiling behind surgical masks. The mask is put on me. The needle is injected into my IV. Count back from 100 said the nurse. The last thing I remember was number 85.

When I woke up, I was numb from my waist down. My chest felt tight and was wrapped tightly. My wrists were loosely tied down. I buzzed the nurse. My Mom and Aunt V came in. The nurse did a quick exam and told us the doctor would be in soon.

How did things go? Can I see it? Will I look normal? I was a fury of questions.

Calm down, Rianna! Mom said. 

I looked at Mom with a questioning look. Who told you that? I asked.

The nurses told me! Mom said smiling. 

I barely remember ever mentioning it to the nurses. 

I have your name change request here Rianna said, Mom.

It was filled out by my full name to become Rianna Maria Stevens. I questioned Mom on the last name. 

Mom that's your maiden name. Yes, sweetie. I thought as long as I'm getting your changed I'd change mine too. 

I beamed with pride.

This will be a fresh start for both of us.

What will Dad say if he ever comes back? I asked.

He's been gone 10 years and abandoned us. He never sent a single dollar to help us. He has no say.

You're my daughter now, I love you so much. Mom said.

You're my niece now, Rianna! Aunt V said. Your mom has named me as your legal guardian while you stay with me. Said Aunt Vanessa 

Week 3 in hospital

4 days after surgery, I was allowed to use the bathroom myself, supervised by a female nurse (thank gosh). I never saw another male nurse after the first day.

After my bathroom trip, I walked to the nurse's station and back. It took every bit of energy to get back to my room. The nurse almost had to lift me to get me in bed.

Thank goodness you're so light and slender. She said.

I wonder what I weigh now I asked.

We can weigh you tomorrow if you want.

I'd like that I said.

Before dinner that night, Mom, Aunt V, and Doctor Yung inspected my recovery. You're healing very well. You should be able to go home for another 3-4 days.

Tomorrow, young lady, we'll remove your bandages and wraps. You'll be outfitted with a medical bra and you will need to start dilating.

Dilating? I asked.

Yes, Rianna. Dilating yourself every day from now on for at least the next 12 to 18 months. 
You must dilate your new vagina to keep it open and from closing up on you. Doctor Yung ordered. 

Mom and Aunt V walked me around after we had dinner in my room. The nurse loaded me in bed and I was out. The next morning, Auntie V and Mom had breakfast with me. Aunt V told me she had to fly back to Las Vegas to take care of things at home and her practice. Aunt V said she would fly back to escort me to her home in the next couple of weeks. As scary as it was for me to be leaving my Mom, the thought of a fresh start sounded great. Plus I had to wait for my new ID and birth certificate.

Dilation was horribly painful and humiliating. The nurse was very patient and instructive. Knowing how clueless I was, she used herself as a model and taught me everything about my new flower, as she called it. My nipples got rock hard as she went through the anatomy of the "Flower". She quizzed me extensively on my new flower. I have to say my flower was very pretty. After my dilation was done I was encouraged to do it gently before bed and after I woke up. They gave me a 5 piece set of dilators. Each one looked more painful than the next. By my 4th day of dilating, I was just getting used to number 2. I was mid-duration when Doctor Yung walked in. I blushed.

No need to stop honey. She said. She let me finish. She called in the nurse. Okay, drop your gown.

How's your pain level?

Between 3 and 4. Good start on number 3 the day after tomorrow.

As painful as it was I can't help but get a bit turned on. My nipples get hard every time despite the pain. I did as I was told and the doctor examined me and said I'd be ready to go home in the morning. The nurse measured my body in various places and gave the paper to my mom.

My mom said I need to do some shopping, and I'll see you in the morning, honey.

Nurse can we weigh me I asked.

Sure, While we're at it, you need to take a long walk up and down the halls.

108 lbs. Rianna. You are very slender. Do you exercise?

I used to do gymnastics and dance when I was younger.

No exercise for two months. Just walking and light swimming, nothing strenuous. Your nose is healing up well. It looks like your mother's now. It fits you perfectly Rianna.

Thank you, Tina, I blushed.

I walked until my legs almost collapsed, about 30 minutes. I buzzed the nurse and she helped me in bed. I climbed into bed with just a little help. I dilated on a 3 this time and it felt like a number 1 the first time. All the pain, I worked it slowly in and out. The pain subsided a bit. I kept going until the pain was about half of what I started with. I wiped it down and went to sleep.
I had just finished my morning dilating when Mom arrived. There were a couple of shopping bags and a shoe box. Nurse Tina came in.

Are you ou ready for your worldly debut Rianna? Tina asked.

I will be when I get dressed I said. Besides it's not like I have a choice! 

We laughed. 

My mom got me a size 2 blue denim skater dress with matching bra and panties from Victoria's Secret and a pink sleeveless blouse with pink and white Sketchers and lace-cuffed ankle socks. Being cleared to leave lifted my spirits. I was talking on and off with the hospital's trauma counselor. Her name was Kim, and she was great.

When we went to check out of the hospital, Mom was handed the bill. It was 4,500 dollars. The overall bill was 105,632 dollars. My jaw just dropped. Who paid? Asked mom.

Ms Steven's is it? Asked a very well-dressed woman.

My name is Isabella Newhouse.

Your boys!! Did this!

Yes, Ma'am, and I don't condone their actions or behavior.

Did you pay this bill?

Yes Ma'am. I cannot apologize enough to my boys.

I don't want your money, your boys need to pay for what they did to my child. Mom and I started walking away.

Ms Stevens, please? Please join me for a coffee. I want to talk to you.

Mrs Newhouse, you should know the school has to press charges even if I don't. I know I'm not here for that. Please will you and your daughter join me?

What do you say, Rianna? Asked my mom.

Let's hear what she has to say. Maybe she can give me my balls back!

Ree !!!

Sorry mom.

It's understandable said Mrs Newhouse.

You have 10 minutes, my Mom said. We followed her. She was driving an Infinity FX 60. I knew from car magazines I used to read it was a 70.000 dollar car. That's worth more than 3 times our double-wide mobile home. We pulled in a Starbucks coffee. Mom and Mrs New House drank the same iced caramel coffee drinks. I had a large frozen mocha with whipped cream.

I can't begin to apologize enough for my boy's behavior. They are no angels, but this was way over the top.

Over the top? Seriously? I reacted a bit loudly 

Rianna, please. Mom said. 

Rianna there's nothing I can do to fix this. I know money won't fix this. But you should know my boys, even though they are under house arrest and they are suffering.

How so? Asked mom. I brought my aunt over from Scotland. She is a very strict woman. 
She opened up her phone, and there were two of the four bullies in baby clothes and diapers. That's not all. I locked them in these. She showed us the chastity cages she ordered from Amazon.

My boys will never be in trouble again.

What about the other two? I asked.

First of all the other two are 18. They also have criminal records they deserve what they get. Said Mrs Newhouse. 

I am asking for a little leniency. If they are charged with a felony, it will ruin them.

They should have thought about that before, I said. Did you know they have been bullying me since 5th grade? 

No, I didn't! I'm so sorry! Mrs Newhouse said. 

You know you should thank Mr Milford. If it hadn't been for him, your sons wouldn't be home in diapers. They would be in jail awaiting murder trial, my Mom said.

You're right, but you're a mother. I'm a mother, and I don't want to see my boys in prison for 20 years.

You know they called me a faggot and a sissy fag and cocksucker when they beat me?

Yes, I heard. Said Mrs Newhouse. 

Then you should know if you try to deal down to a misdemeanor they will be federally charged. I'm sorry we can't help you, Mrs Newhouse.
No one can. I can respect your love for your children. But your boys stepped way over the line.

My son lost his testicles, his penis. He had a punctured lung 3 broken ribs, and a broken nose. My sweet boy is a girl. All because your boys decided he was gay and decided he needed to be beaten. If the shoe was on the other foot what would you do?

You make valid points, Ms Stevens.

For what it's worth, I'm ashamed and sorry for both of you. Thank you for listening. She left a 10-dollar tip for the coffee.

Well, Rianna, what do you think?

You don't want to know, Mom.

Actually, I do.

I'd like to see them neutered. If I can't be a boy, why should they?

Can you imagine those boys as girls, Rianna? They'd crack mirrors they'd be so ugly!

We laughed as we sipped our coffee.

Mom, look! I pointed at the note on the table. If you want to talk, please call; thanks, Isabella Newhouse.

Just as we got up to leave, Mom's cell phone started buzzing. Hello Detective. We are leaving Starbucks and heading home. No, we can't. Rianna's very tired. Yes, that would be fine see you soon. Detective Smith is stopping by the house we better go.

Mom had just started a pot of coffee when Detective Smith and DA Summers pulled up. I answered the door and opened it before they knocked.

Rianna? Right?

Yes, Detective.

Do you remember DA Summers?

Yes sir.

I'm happy to see you up and about, how are you feeling?

Pain is between 2 and 4.

We have some news and a few questions. First off who pulled you in the bathroom?

Billy Bonds and Paul Jeffries.

Are you sure?

Yes because the Newhouse boys were already in the bathroom combing their hair at the sinks.

Were the Newhouse brothers waiting for you?

No, they turned to look at me first.

Were they goaded into kicking and beating you?

Yes, a little.

Do you remember what was said to them?

They were told to man up or get manned up.

Anything else?

No. I can tell you it didn't take much to get them to join in. They all bullied me at some point. Mr Milford broke it up once with me and the Newhouse brothers.

What happened?

They'd push me around call me names, and give me swirlies. But up until the incident they never did more slap me or give me wedgies.

What about Bonds or Jeffries?

They always punched me, kicked me, tied me down, and snapped me with wet towels.

Did you report it?

I didn't have to; Mr Huber, the gym teacher, caught them. He had them suspended for 3 days.

Mom says what's this all about detective?

Well, the Bond and Jeffries boys said the Newhouse tried to pull them off Rianna.

What? I said that's bullshit! They may not have started it but they were fully participating in beating me half to death.

Detective, Mr Summers there's something you should know. Mrs Newhouse came to see us. While we checked out of the hospital we saw that Rianna's bill was paid almost in full, all except her breast implants. She met us at the front desk and took us to Starbucks at the strip mall for a coffee.

Can you prove it?

Yes, she paid with a card, and she left this. Mom handed him the note.

What exactly did she say? Mr Summers said in a very serious tone. 

Mom proceeded to tell them about our conversation.

Did she confirm paying the hospital bill?

Yes.

Did you ask her too?

Hell no I don't want bitchs' money. We may not have much Mr Summers. But what we have we earn. I own a small beauty shop. It's not much but it's mine. I want those boys to pay for what they did! With life behind bars.

Did Mrs Newhouse offer you a dollar amount for a favorable statement?

No, she showed me pictures of her boys and an aunt punishing her boys. She did beg us for a favorable statement. I told her that we couldn't help her and to be careful not to cut a deal for her boys, because of a possible hate crime charge.

What did she say? She apologized for her son's behavior.

What does all this mean for my son and this case? My mother asked. 

Well, what she did borders on witness tampering. But she admitted fault. But not for her boys directly. It's a fine line. Bond and Jeffries are going away; with their priors and the physical evidence collected, they plead guilty. They got 25 years each. The Newhouse boys plead innocent. Their lawyer is trying to deal with a misdemeanor assault. Their lawyer has made a good case. Some of it is confirmed by your detailed account.

The Newhouse boys beat my child, mutilating him to the point that he is now a she. Regardless of any of those so-called details those boys actively participated in my child's traumatic attack. Please tell me you're not considering a deal.

The Newhouse boys are first-time offenders. Said DA Summers.

Only because they're one of the richest people in town. My Mom said. 

I know you are upset, said Mr Summers.

Upset? You've no clue. None! Mom said

It was just then I had a PTSD flashback and blacked out. Not sure what happened, but DA Summers had changed his tune when I came to, laying on the floor covered in a cold sweat.
My apologies, Ms Stevens. We'll take another look.

Talk to Mr Milford I said.

We'll be in touch, said Detective Smith.

For the next 3 days, we heard nothing. Mom was busy day and night trying to catch up at work. Her staff did a great job keeping things afloat. But bills had piled up and my mother's clients needed attention. I stayed inside mostly too afraid to even walk the circle in the trailer park.
Mrs Chandler, the owner of the park, was friends with my mom and one of her best clients. Mrs Chandler gave me the key to the park's pool. She said I could use it anytime. I started swimming early every morning before people were up and moving. It was scary walking to the pool. I was relieved When she was there, watching over me.
DA Summers wanted to hold a deposition at his office. While I didn't want to relive it again, I knew I had to.

The day before the deposition while mom was working, I got a call.

Auntie V!!!

Hi, sweetheart, how are you? I'm holding up. Are you sleeping?

On and off. I said. 

Are you still waking up in cold sweats?

Yes, every night.

Look, honey, the reason I called. I'm sending a friend of mine to help. She should be there soon.
Her name is Cathy Pambini. She's an Attorney, so you can trust her. She's going to help you for tomorrow. I'll be flying tomorrow. I'll be there for your depo, baby girl. Stay strong, sweetie. I'll see you soon.

Ten minutes later a knock on the screen door. I jumped into the hall, trying to hide.

Hello! Brenda, Rianna? My name is Cathy, Vanessa Stockton sent me.

I rushed to the door. There stood a very beautiful woman. Her black wavey hair, emerald green eyes, and perfect eyeliner look tattooed. She looked like she was part Asian. She was wearing a smart-looking blazer dress much like Aunt V wears at work.

Rianna?

Yes!

Cathy Pambini your Aunt Vanessa sent me. May I come in?

Ohh, gosh please Ms Pambini. Call me Cathy, please.

You can call me Ree. 

Okay, Ree.

Would like some coffee? I asked.

Look, Ree. Truth be told, I'm half Italian and half Korean; I need something stronger; do you have Starbucks or something like it? My treat, she smiled brightly. It put me at ease.

Sounds great. Let me call Mom. I put on my skater dress, and blouse and my sketchers. I navigate us to Starbucks. She wasn't kidding about the coffee she drinks. Triple shot of espresso in a frozen Caramel cappuccino. I got one too. Wow, what a rush! Cathy was really sweet to me. She had a big diamond ring on her left hand.

That's a beautiful ring, I said. Thank you, said Cathy.

Is your husband a lawyer I asked yes.

He's a partner like I am. She showed me a picture of them. He's Handsome, Tall, with blonde hair, and blue eyes. He looked Swedish. 

Do you have children, I asked.

Not yet but we are trying.

How are you coping Rianna?

You mean since I was almost killed and transformed into a girl?

Yeah, Yes she said hesitating.

I'm sorry Cathy. It's been a rough morning.

All good Ree.

Cathy you seem very comfortable around a person like me, why is that?

Well, you're very sweet and polite, for one. And the second reason is one of my best friends is a trans woman! She's one of the best and bravest people I know. You remind me of her. You're a people reader, aren't you Ree?

Yes but not enough to avoid an attack.

That's not your fault Ree. I read all the reports. I can't begin to imagine your horror. Now you're adjusting to being a girl. You're a brave person.

I have to be Cathy, it's not like I have a choice.

Do you have any outfits, makeup, shoes, or intimates?

No, Ma'am, not much.

Do you have a dress or a suit to wear tomorrow?

No Ma'am.

Have you ever shopped for makeup?

No Cathy, I haven't.

Mom's been really busy, and the pool at the park has been my only outing. I try to maintain a very low profile. This is all so new to me.

Will you allow me to help you, Ree?

No offense meant, but I'm not a pet project or a charity.

I know you're not, Ree! 

But I have been around several trans women, all older than you. But their struggles are the same minus your trauma. Look it's my treat, humor me. Maybe together, we can find your inner girl, and lessen your anxiety a little. Plus we need to get you some clothes for tomorrow's deposition.

Please Ree?

Cathy was powerful, polite, and very nice to me. Her piercing green eyes captivated me! 

Okay, Cathy, I'm sorry I'm so snarky.

All good Ree! You're carrying a lot right now. Let's try and lighten the load together.

Thanks, Cathy!

We finished our drinks and hiked across the parking lot to Ulta Beauty Supply. This place was like a supermarket for makeup and beauty supplies. They even had a full-service salon in the back for hair, nails, and waxing. They even had an ear-piercing station. Cathy had 5 in each lobe, I kept staring at them.

Shall we get your ears pierced again?

Yes, please. I was sat down on a stool. How many in each ear, dear? Ask the lady. 4 more in each, please, just like my friend! I said.

Cathy was shocked but said nothing.
I want to look like my mom; she has 3 in each ear, I said. 4 more it is! said Cathy.

Kala, the piercer, gave 2 large gold studs and then 2 medium ones. Cathy bought 2" gold hoops for my bottom holes. I loved it.

Shall I wax her eyebrows? Kala asked.

Yes please say Cathy.

How thin? Kala asked.

Christina Ricci as high an arch as you can please.

The waxing stung something awful but I stayed quiet.

Would you like me to see if a stylist is free?

Please, Kala, thank you. Cathy said.

Rianna, I'm Cindy. I'll be your stylist today. What are we thinking today?

How about a bob with a slight wedge to the front? Asked Cathy.

I like it, said Cindy.

Any color?

How about Ash Red? Cathy stated

That sounds great. Any makeup?

Yes, she needs an everyday look, something befitting a 13 to 14-year-old girl.

I can do that! Said Cindy Do you have a makeup brand in mind? Asked Cindy.

MAC said, Cathy.

Cindy was a whirlwind of activity. Once under the hairdryer, Cindy came over with a nail cart and gave me a full set of gel nails in French style, short just a 1/8" over my fingertips. By the time Cindy was done, I not only looked like a girl, I finally started feeling like one.

Mom called and asked how I was doing. I told her about Cathy. She said she knew, and Aunt V knew, too. I told her about my earrings.
She loved it. I said I wanted a nose stud like hers. Mom said the left side, small, like mine, was okay. I just then noticed Cathy had a stud in her nose on the left. Cathy paid for everything including brushes for my makeup.

The next stop was DSW for shoes. She bought me 2 pairs of heels 3" with a slightly wide heel and one pair spiked. And two pairs of flat, black and pink. The next stop was Kohl's. I thought Cathy went overboard. She bought me a beautiful blazer dress black and red plaid patterned. One pencil skirt suit in pale pink with slacks to match.

3 bras, two packages of panties, and 3 babydoll nighties. She also bought 3" heeled mules. She said girls wear heels. I complained it was too much and there was no way I could pay her back.  Cathy said that her trans friend helped lift her at a very low point in her life. This was her way to pay it forward.

I thanked Cathy endlessly. We had a light lunch. I mentioned how much I loved her nose. She said you want one, it's on me. We stopped at a tattoo salon, and 20 minutes later, my left nasal had a gold stud. As we started driving to my mom's salon. Cathy glanced at me. She said. You know Ree! You're a natural for a teenage girl.

Really?

Yes, you smoothed your skirt and sat butt first and swung your legs in and I noticed a little sway in those hips.

I was watching you Cathy you're very graceful in your movements.

Thanks Ree.

Cathy, I can't thank you enough for today. l finally feel like I can smile.

That's great, Ree; I need you to be happy because if you feel happy, you'll be focused on the bigger picture of life.

What do you mean, Cathy?

You're a girl now Ree. Enjoy it, being a girl is much better than being a boy. We get to wear a better variety of clothes, shoes, and jewelry. We can change our looks anytime with makeup and hairstyles. The best part is getting men to do what they want with a smile. I know you lost a lot, Ree, but give things a chance; let me help you and your Mom. You guys will get through this. Now, let's show your Mom your new look.