A Guardsman's Game (Redux)
Added 2024-10-04 10:03:52 +0000 UTCI kind of been thinking about redoing this story, because I feel like I kind got off the rails a little bit and made a lot of mistakes. A redo would be slower-paced and more character-driven, with more characters and a revamped Gamer System that doesn't rely too much on random bullshit.
But, I'm happy to take opinions.
Note that a Redux would mean I don't work on the current version for a while and it'll effectively be left on something of a HIATUS.
Comments
I love the Story in the way that it actually is, specially about the way he saved the Emperor because it gives hope in a setting that... really needs it, I love WH40k, but sometimes I feel a little overwhelmed by all the darkness, if you remake the story, I would like to keep that part, but hey, it's your story, I'm gonna read it, do whatever you feel is the best for your story.
Hiram Resendez
2024-10-07 03:27:34 +0000 UTCI actually really enjoyed it. Even with all the crazy bullshit he’s gotten, he’s still seriously weak in the universe so it didn’t feel like he’s some Gary Stu. The only complaint I had was his fear to use his powers but other than that, I enjoyed the chaos of it all. The random rewards make it completely unpredictable in an already insane verse. And seeing this perfectly normal guardsman come to grips with the fact that he’s now a champion of Humanity and has to live up to it has been a great journey. Again because he basically has to adapt again and again to more random bullshit falling into his lap. My vote is staying with this. I’m invested in seeing if he sinks or swims
Daddy Ivan
2024-10-04 20:44:32 +0000 UTCEDIT: Redux could be a side project that you can do on your own time whenever you feel like it, too.
DryComplementary
2024-10-04 19:40:15 +0000 UTCFacts: To me comedy is welcome but sometimes feels… out of place. Don’t get me wrong; I like it but remembering who and what the Emperor is in 40k and then cutting to him slapping a dimension-shattering clasp with the clown god of the Eldar alters my immersion into the story so much it makes me worry about serious moments in the future being not as impactful or shocking. Then again, this the authors fiction (if you plan to do more comedy like so, that’s also fine regardless, a slice of life in the Grim DARKNESS of the setting is cool; as long as you just keep writing!)
DryComplementary
2024-10-04 19:38:28 +0000 UTCPersonally really liked that the guardsman saved the emperor basically, but liked all the comedy with the custodes less, even if they were just acting.
Yuval Roth
2024-10-04 19:07:46 +0000 UTC
