Andy Keeps Trying - Chapter 06

ANDY KEEPS TRYING

Chapter 6: Andy kisses a boy (and he likes it)

Surprisingly enough, I was courted by many gentlemen after my break-up with Darius.

Despite my promise to remain single, I was bound to fall for one of them at some point.

I kissed a boy on Friday.

It was a busy day.

*

Cody.

Laurie had spent the night and she was having breakfast with Cody when I got up.

They were already dressed and seemed excited about something, looking at their laptop.

“What’s up, guys?”

“Good morning, Andy.”

“Slept well?”

“I did. What are you two looking at?”

Laurie and Cody glanced at each other.

“Guess who I’ve got a job offer from?” Cody asked.

“How should I know?”

Laurie seemed in a hurry to share the news.

“The city council!” She exclaimed.

“Oh. You’re gonna work for the city, that’s cool.”

“I haven’t told them yes. Not yet. I was waiting for your opinion actually.”

I chuckled. “What would you need my opinion for? I don’t know shit about architecture.”

Laurie looked way too giddy; something was up.

“Roomie, you do realize who I’d be working for if I took the job at the urban planning department for the city of Philadelphia…”

Finally, my tired neurons connected.

“No way!” I exclaimed.

“I know, right?”

“You’re going to work for David Crown. Seriously?”

“I don’t know! That’s why I wanted to ask you about it first.”

I was about to have a meltdown, but Cody’s reaction was very cute.

“Wait… You’re waiting for my green light?”

“Yes, of course. I don’t want it to be weird for you.”

“Cody! Who cares about me? This is your career. If you think it’s the right move for you, go for it!”

“It’s more like, I’ve gotten the chance to pass my exams thanks to him, and there’s an opening, and I’m looking for a job…”

“Then don’t think about it twice. I’m already working with his wife and his son for God’s sake so what difference does it make?”

“Exactly!” Laurie approved.

“Seems like I’m doomed to be connected to David Crown in every possible way.”

“Except in a romantic way…” Cody pointed out.

“That’s right. At this point, it’s ridiculous.” Laurie said.

“What is?”

“The will they / won’t they thing. You guys fuck like twice last year, you haven’t done anything since before Christmas, now it’s Summer, and still, there’s like this lingering question of ‘will they will finally start dating?’ ”

“There’s no lingering question! I told him no, explicitly. It’s not my fault if he’s offering a job to my best friend and keeps popping back into my life.”

It was a poor defense.

“Come on, Andy. Are you really not going to, at the freaking least, have sex with him one more time to see where this leads.”

“Stop it, guys! And as a matter of fact, I have other options, you know.”

Cody and Laurie exchanged a look.

They were so tiring when they were grilling me on my love life.

I did not tell them anything more.

They probably thought I was bluffing but it was true. I had been developing a few flirtatious relationships lately.

*

Zachary.

One of the questions was whether Zachary Crown really was one of them.

I had still not figured out what his little stunt in the restrooms meant. If it meant anything at all.

Was he even gay? And if so, attracted to me?

Apparently, the gala had gone well since Rebecca was in a great mood.

A few members of the party previously pledged to Broadhall had apparently changed their allegiance to her.

Politics has not changed much since the times of kings and queens. It is all about being surrounded by a devoted court.

The comparison is especially fitting when your name is Crown.

Zachary was pretty joyful too but that was not unusual.

After only a few weeks, he was already very comfortable with everyone in the office and was joking around a lot.

There was a fine line between being forthcoming to the point of being off-putting and being friendly and welcoming to people, but just like his father, Zach was a master at walking that line.

Also, I should point out that he was wearing his tightest polo shirt so far and because it was light grey, his nipples were almost completely on display, poking through the fabric all day long.

But I digress.

Rebecca asked Zach and I into her office before lunch so we could briefly report on what we had completed data-wise.

I told her the truth, which was that I was very satisfied with Zach’s help and I would like, if possible, to keep him on my side in the following weeks.

We planned to survey the potential voters on three key issues: abortion, Medicare, and tariffs.

Rebecca was still looking for her exact position on those.

She agreed to have the new intern keep working for me, and Zach seemed quite happy too.

I tried to detect if he was enthusiastic about the actual work or about spending more time with me.

I then restrained myself and I cursed Laurie for putting such a silly idea in my head.

I quickly had something much more important to worry about anyway.

Zachary left the office and I stayed a few more minutes with Rebecca so she could brief me on additional missions.

There was nothing special and it was a short meeting.

But then, she said something that completely caught me off guard.

“Your roommate will be working for David?”

“Huh… Yes, I guess, he told me this morning.”

“Hm… You guys should be careful; I don’t want another scandal on my hands.”

“I’m not sure what you mean, David and I aren’t together. We’re not seeing each other at all.”

“I’m not talking about that; Everybody already knows we’re divorcing and it’s common knowledge at this point that my husband prefers hairy ass to vaginas.”

Rebecca’s bluntness would always amaze me.

That was one way to define homosexuality, I thought.

“I guess so.”

“Who cares if he’s humping you? What difference would it make at this stage? But the game he’s playing with your roommate, that’s not okay.”

I had to take a breather.

What was she talking about?!

Millions of thoughts went into my brain all at once.

Was David fucking Cody?

Wait, no, that was just impossible.

Was he flirting with him? Did he want to fuck my roommate now that he did not have me anymore?

But… 

This did not make sense. Cody was back to dating Laurie.

“My roommate is very much straight!”

That was my first coherent thought but also the first thing that came out of my mouth.

Rebecca rolled her eyes.

“Good Lord, you’re naïve.”

“Wh… What?”

She smiled.

“I’m not talking about sex, God damn it. You truly are obsessed, White.”

“I… I’m not following. What kind of game is he playing then?”

“I was referring to the scholarship, and then the bribe for the exam, now the job. That’s starting to be a lot. This will be noticeable at some point.”

I was once again taken aback.

I processed what she said.

“Wait, he endorsed the application for the scholarship, and there’s a job opening but… What bribe?”

Rebecca sighed.

“Forget it. I actually thought you were the one asking for it, but given the expression on your face right now, either you’re a great actor— which I highly doubt— or you had no idea.”

“I definitely had no idea. I don’t get it.”

“Then, it’s great for you. It means that for once, you’re not involved in any potential scandal. Congratulations.”

“Wait. Now, you have to tell me.”

“I don’t have to tell you anything. Get out of my office, White, and go back to work.”

There was no way I would just go back to work and ignore the bomb she had dropped on me.

I thought about something while walking to my desk, how Cody was convinced he had fucked up and did not pass his final tests.

Fuck…

Had David played a role in my roommate passing his exam?!

*

David.

I just needed to know.

I told Laurie and Kendrick I had something personal and quite urgent to do during lunch time and I went to the damn city hall.

In eight months living in Philly, I had never been. Rebecca had held a few meetings there but I was not asked to attend at the time.

The city hall was not far away from where we worked so I knew I could do the round trip quickly.

In any case, I just needed to talk to David ASAP.

His involvement in my life, and now, in the life of my friends, was getting way too strange.

We were overdue for a talk and if I were to wait any longer, I would not have the guts to confront him.

The woman at the townhall lobby was difficult with me.

She would not call David’s office as I could not prove that I had an official meeting with him.

I had to call him on his personal phone and, luckily, he picked up and told the hostess to let me take the elevator.

“See!” I told her, a bit annoyed.

She made a face but gave me a name tag reluctantly.

The thing was, David was excited when I told him I was there to see him.

I cringed slightly, thinking that this meeting would certainly not turn out the way he would like it to.

Indeed, when he welcomed me in, he was visibly happy to see me, looking way too satisfied in his beige suit.

“To what do I owe the honor of your visit, Mr. White?”

“David, I need to talk to you.”

I was not sure where my straight forwardness came from. I guess that I had just had enough of our games.

Laurie was right, it was becoming ridiculous.

“You seem serious.”

He sat back down behind his desk, disappointed.

“It’s about my roommate, Cody.”

“The job offer? Is that a problem?”

“It’s not but… Rebecca just told me something and I… I need to know.”

He puffed.

“Rebecca says stuff sometimes, doesn’t mean it’s true.”

“She mentioned a bribe to get Cody to pass his exam, she also thought I was the one asking you to do me this favor.”

“She really wants to screw us over, doesn’t she? First, she puts our son on your lap, then, she tells you this.”

“She didn’t put Zachary on my… I mean… Is it true? The bribe?”

“Last night, an idiot from the university board blabbered a bit too much during a private conversation and it seems like Rebecca has ears everywhere.”

“That wasn’t my question.”

“Don’t you think Cody Chase deserved to pass? I read his application for the scholarship. He was ready months ago to be an architect, much smarter than most men his age.”

“Again! That’s not the point!”

“I happen to know people from the university, and you didn’t seem to mind me using my influence when it was about giving him a scholarship?”

“That’s not fair, David. This was different. He couldn’t get a recommendation; I only gave you his application so you could read it.”

“I know. Look, this friend of mine told me your roommate was 2 points behind.He let me know because I had endorsed him before. We talked, and we both came to the conclusion that it would be silly to ruin a young man’s bright future for two stupid points.”

I looked at the ceiling.

“It is true, then…”

“Andy, are you really going to be mad at me for that? Come on, you know it was the right thing to do.”

“I just don’t want to be involved in stuff like that. It’s not… Those are not my values.”

“Values… The system is corrupted in its core. If you don’t learn to work it in your favor, you’re screwed.”

“I don’t think Cody should know.” I eventually said.

“I agree. Rebecca wasn’t very smart sharing this.”

“To be fair, I really think she thought I was behind this.”

“I’ll clear your name.”

“You don’t have to.”

“What do you want from me then?”

“Nothing, I needed to clear that up. That’s all. I… I’ll just…”

“Leave? That’ll be your excuse then?”

“For what?”

“For not giving me even a chance. I did that because I care about you and I know you care about your friend.”

I looked at him and his ever-beautiful blue eyes.

“That’s the problem.”

“Well, congrats to Rebecca, she really knows how to play dirty.”

“And you’re the exact same! You think what you did, quote-unquote ‘for me’ is endearing? It’s just crazy. Who does that?!”

“I thought you’d be happy for your friend.”

“You can’t scheme like this behind my back, even if it’s to make me happy. That’s creepy. You know what I really want? Normalcy.”

That seemed to hurt him for real, and I felt bad.

“I see… Maybe I’m just too fucked up for you then.”

“Believe me, I’m fucked up too. But this whole thing— it makes me uncomfortable.”

“So, what? I tell Cody he cannot work here anymore?”

“Of course, not. Just… You shouldn’t hire him because of me. You shouldn’t do anything because of me.”

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“The divorce! How am I supposed to feel about you filing for divorce seemingly because you have a crush on me? That’s way too much pressure.”

“First of all, you know this is not all because of you. Second of all, what am I supposed to do then, Andy? Lie to you? Lie about my feelings? You’re allowed not to reciprocate them, but you’re not allowed to tell me that I cannot feel the way I feel about you.”

“I… I just don’t get it.”

“Why?”

“Because I’m just Andy.”

He chuckled.

“I didn’t mean for this to cause you any stress but I can’t say that I’m sorry for giving your friend an opportunity.”

“You do understand that, in some ways, I’m thankful for that. But this is also a bit much. I don’t think we could ever be together, David. We come from very different worlds, we work in different circles, we see things differently… And I don’t want you to imagine that, because you helped…”

“Please, don’t bother with an explanation. I don’t need it.”

“I’m just saying that…”

“No, really. That’s it, I get it.”

I could not believe that I was really saying no to that man.

It killed me inside, but it felt like the right decision at the time. The scandal about our affair had hurt me way too much and he just showed me how unpredictable he was.

“I’m sorry, David. I guess… I guess I should go. I came here on a whim. Maybe I shouldn’t have.”

“It’s good to be spontaneous sometimes. Honestly, I’m glad we had this talk. At least we cleared the air.”

He stood up and walked towards me.

“I’m glad to see your arm looks better.” I said awkwardly.

“It doesn’t even hurt anymore. Can I hug you goodbye?”

“Of course.”

We hugged each other and I smelt his perfume.

I did not care for it but I cared for the raw manly scent underneath. This, I would miss for sure.

The hug lasted a bit longer than what would be appropriate between two casual friends.

Friends…

We were not even that.

We had never been anything more than just a hook up. A weekly fuck, months prior.

How did that impact me so much to the point of leaving my ex-boyfriend?

I left the office, not regretting my decision but not entirely sure of myself either.

Had David not just proved how much he cared about me?

Why did I have to freak out like this?

*

Victor.

The day was far from over though.

Leaving the town hall I almost bumped into Victor.

I simply could not get away from the men who were making my cock stir up!

“Andy! What are you doing here?”

“I… Campaign business, I cannot share with you.”

“Get that. I’m also here on a secret mission.” He winked at me.

“Nice. I wouldn’t want to interrupt you— crucial task, I assume.”

He was smiling ear-to-ear.

“I do need to have lunch though, and the sun is up. I was about to have a sandwich by myself on the bench, wanna join me so it doesn’t look as depressing?”

“Uh… I’m not sure.”

“Come on, I’m not the enemy. We can eat a damn sandwich together!”

“I guess you’re right.”

It was sunny outside and why not try to have a normal friendship with Victor?

We found a nice spot and we ate tuna sandwiches while looking up at city hall. It was one of the most impressive buildings in Philly.

“Look, Andy, you’re visibly pissed at me for what happened back in college. I’m sorry about that; I know I was an immature brat.”

“And you’re not anymore?”

“I grew up!”

“I’m not even mad at you. I’m only mad at myself for being so naïve back then. I mean, I kept coming back no matter how bad you were treating me.”

“Was I that bad?”

“You cheated on me— all the time. You ignored me for weeks. Then you came back to me when I was finally detaching myself, only to lure me back into your web.”

Victor seemed taken aback.

I had not expected to share that much but the words had escaped from my mouth before I realized what I was saying. I supposed it was just the day.

It was all true though.

“Wow… I really didn’t see things that way.”

“Well, I did… But water under the bridge, eh?”

“You know you were my fave, right?”

“Your fave?”

“There was a reason why I kept coming back to you.”

“I should be flattered for being your favorite toy in the collection?”

“Maybe…”

“I’m not. You grew up and so did I. I won’t accept being treated that way anymore.”

“I’ve told you, I’m sorry. It wasn’t right, I can own up to that.”

“And that’s why we can sit on the same bench. Did you find anyone after college? Any real relationships?”

“I dated a guy for a few months in Chicago, but nothing too serious. He was a good looking twink, exactly my type but it didn’t last. What about you?”

I spent two years obsessing over you and then I slept with my boss and it was a nationwide scandal.

I went for a different answer.

“I dated someone here in Philly for like four months. I… I was actually still with him when we met at the Party Convention last April.”

“Oh… You hadn’t mentioned a boyfriend.”

“My mistake. I should have. That’s why I didn’t reply to your texts by the way, I thought it’d be inappropriate.”

“And it’s over now?”

“Yes. I’m single.”

“Ready to mingle?”

“Maybe…”

“You have a locked target?”

“That’s so you, considering people as targets to conquer.”

“I’m an Alpha male.”

I rolled my eyes and kept eating my sandwich.

The rest of the lunch was more pleasant.

I had mostly fallen for Victor for his dick, let’s be real, but he did seem more interesting now.

We left on good terms and I returned to the office.

I did not say to anyone I had seen David (or Victor) during the lunch break.

Strangely, I felt relieved about both conversations.

Now, everything was clear. I had ended the ambiguity. We were done.

*

Adrian.

Since it was Friday, I left rather early to go to the Cope with Trauma meeting.

I was not sure that I needed it anymore, but I went there anyway. It was nice to see Adrian and chat with him.

In fact, it had slowly turned into the highlight of my week.

Who would have thought?

We sat side by side and heard Felicia sharing one of her personal stories.

It was the first time I heard her talk about herself and it was quite moving.

Like idiots, Adrian and I both ended up in tears as Felicia told us about how she had left a violent father only to find herself a violent husband and what she had to do to escape and stop the pattern.

Truly inspiring.

Adrian held my thigh at some point and I let him. I even put my hand on top of his.

I had not felt this secure in a while.

After the meeting, as we walked to our favorite sushi place, he told me that it would be his last time.

“I don’t think I need to go to these meetings anymore. I feel and sleep much better than a couple months ago.”

“I was thinking that too… Although…”

“What?”

“I guess I was happy to come just to see you.” I admitted.

Adrian smiled.

He was cute. Really cute.

He wore a checkered shirt, unbuttoned at the top, letting me see a bit of his chest.

Summer time was really the best. Especially in July when the sun set very late and the temperature was ideal around 8 p.m.

“We don’t have to stop seeing each other because we stop going to the meetings.”

“Really?”

We arrived at the sushi place.

“We could just… choose to spend time together.” He suggested, opening the glass door and stepping aside for me to enter.

The way he said that implied many things. I felt myself blushing.

We were seated in the restaurant and our conversation was interrupted. It gave me some time to wrap my head around it.

We did not mention seeing each other until much later, when it was time to leave the restaurant.

It was pretty clear that it was not our usual post-meeting dinner.

Adrian was looking at me differently, and I was slowly letting myself be more vulnerable and open.

Honestly, it felt great to finally let my guards down.

Since my break-up with Darius, every day had been a fight not to fall for any other guy.

Maybe it was time for me to stop fighting.

“I’ve really been enjoying getting to know you lately. I never thought you’d be like this.” I told him.

I wanted so badly to hold his hand.

“I get it… You didn’t see the best side of me when we met. I… I probably didn’t make the right choice when the paper released those pictures.”

“Let’s not talk about this anymore. It’s in the past.”

“No, really, it’ll be a good lesson for me in the future.”

“And for me as well. Believe me.”

Honestly, with the sun setting over the buildings and Adrian and I unable to say goodbye, I was ready to give in.

“Andy, I’ve really enjoyed getting to know you, too.”

We stopped in the middle of the street. We looked at each other.

“Why aren’t you making a move then?” I provoked him.

“You’d like that?”

“I think I would.”

It is hard to say in the end who made the first move that evening.

We both leaned toward each other and I kissed Adrian for the first time.

He was so attractive, and I cannot deny that I wanted to tear off his clothes.

But I think what made me fall for him instead of one of the other boys was that I got to know Adrian on a deeper level. I felt like I knew him. It felt safe and it felt right.

Adrian was a great kisser, by the way, sweet and passionate.

Maybe the start of something new? Something real?