markvelasquez

New Beginnings

Added 2017-12-28 22:33:24 +0000 UTC

Well, this morning started out fairly normal, and my afternoon is ending in a most unexpected and unprecedented way. I just found out I'm getting fired tomorrow, my position is being downsized, eliminated. Nothing personal. Small severance. See ya.

I honestly don't know how to feel about it. This feels like when a woman you don't like, who you've been trying to break up with for a while, suddenly breaks up with YOU. There's a bit of joy, sorrow, confusion, lots of uncertainty, but also a profound feeling of relief.

I think this could be a good thing. A nice kick in the pants to start the new year off fresh, clean, challenged. I've never been without a job in my entire adult life. These are unprecedented waters. I'm confused. Shocked. And I have an ache in my chest that only comes with intense fear or severe disappointment.

Still, I can't help but feel hopeful, curious about what the new year will hold for me. I'm not the kind of guy to take big risks, but now I guess I'll have to. Maybe I can double down on Patreon and try even harder to expand my photography. I'll definitely have more time to go to the gym. Or maybe I'll sit in a dark corner for the next several months and cry forgotten tears.

Either way, this is the last post I'll be writing from this desk here at a small, Spanish TV station in Santa Maria, California. I'm confused and physically shaky. But I remain hopeful. Wish me luck.