Excerpts from Thaddeus Shuttlecock’s highly controversial “Disrespectful Rhymes For Rebellious Children, Fourth Edition” -- bonus snippet
Added 2021-12-01 06:25:33 +0000 UTCNine Inquisition
Nine Inquisition engaged in debate,
One’s declared a heretic and now there are eight.
Eight Inquisition musing about heaven,
One decides to check it out and now there are seven.
Seven Inquisition fighting with sticks,
One’s hit a bit too hard and now there are six.
Six Inquisition happy and alive,
One makes trouble and now there are five.
Five Inquisition at a witch’s door,
One takes a risk and now there are four.
Four Inquisition drinking some tea,
One doesn’t check for poison and now there are three.
Three Inquisition cooking up a stew,
There wasn’t enough beef so now there are two.
Two Inquisition finding a gun,
They don’t know how to use it so now there’s one.
One High Inquisitor standing at dawn,
No friends to watch his back so now he’s gone.
.
–---
.
Mixing up a Potion
Mixing up a potion, what should we put in?
Slugs and snails, fill it to the brim.
Mixing up a potion, what should we add?
Dad’s toenails and an old lily pad!
Mixing up a potion, what goes next?
A spoon of mud and we say a nasty hex!
Mixing up a potion, what goes in last?
A drop of blood and some broken glass!
Mixed up a potion, where should it be?
We’ll put it in mother’s and father’s tea!
.
-----
.
A Flower in my Neighbour's Lawn
There was a flower in my neighbour’s lawn so I cast a spell
I wanted my flowers to do that well.
But flowers were a lot of work, I had another try –
It was easier to go and make my neighbour’s flower die!
Comments
The title is so fantastic I cackled at it for a few minutes before even reading the rhymes. And dang, they ARE rude.
rye
2023-01-17 23:02:28 +0000 UTCNo ominous at all, just some... normal rhymes
Kim Poce
2022-07-08 17:18:58 +0000 UTC
