Musings: September

Reports of my death have been greatly exaggerated.

August was… not ideal. Here’s what happened. Mom went on vacation for three weeks. I figured I could safely spend a week on a ‘vacation’ of my own, just living like a goblin, eating whatever I wanted, not bothering to clean up, no chores, no responsibilities, no work… Well, turns out the goblin life isn’t exactly great for my mental state, and without anyone to call me on my bullshit, I tend to indulge in said bullshit far more than healthy. I spent a lot of time sitting around feeling gross and then not doing anything to fix the grossness. At some point it starts to feel like the grossness is an inherent quality of my being and that trying to clean up or even take a shower would be, like… fake? Like being clean would be a facade, a mask of cleanliness hiding my true gross nature, a betrayal of my fundamental goblinry. I also bought Monster Hunter World and put 135 hours into it in about two weeks, which means I was spending about 40% of each day in the game. Eventually, she came home, and there was a lot of catching up to do, then I ran out of my ADHD pills and kept forgetting to call for more because of the ADHD… It was just a giant fucking mess.

But, this is why I was so happy to build up that buffer in the first place. Because shit like this happens sometimes, and thanks to that buffer, I weathered the storm and I’m not in panic mode. I do have to get serious and put my nose to the proverbial grindstone to build it back up, but I’m not completely out of material. I’m not scrambling, I don’t have to rush my writing and pump out low-quality shit because I need to post SOMETHING, ANYTHING, or I’ll DIE. I’m okay.

On the business side of things, I raised the limit on the number of $25+ patrons and the vacancies were almost immediately filled! The original commissioner of Gwen’s Curse is back, so that’ll be going back into regular rotation again, and I got another two new commissions that I think you’re all gonna enjoy! This also puts me well over $250 for the first post, so I might even be able to switch to a monthly charge pretty soon, instead of per chapter. I think I’m gonna try to save up for a month or two before I make the switch, though.

Currently, the plan is to finally finish this chapter of Lay on Hands I’ve been lingering on for far too long, then get started on one of the new commissions, then Gwen’s Curse, then the other new commission, so look forward to all that and (hopefully) more!