Musings: June

 Hey there, it’s a new month, and that means a new musing post!

May was… weird. Started off good, then I ran out of my ADD pills and spend about two weeks completely unable to get anything done. It wasn’t a great time, emotionally, either. But I got a new prescription, and I’m feeling much better, overall.

I’ve been thinking about my productivity, and May really put it in perspective a bit. Here’s the thing- It takes me between, like, three and five days to write a chapter in this format, which is great. So, logically, I would conclude that if I wrote every day, I would be making five or six stories in a month. The problem is, I don’t. Trust me, it’s not from lack of trying. There are days where I spend six hours just staring at the cursor and feeling like garbage ‘cause for some inexplicable reason I can’t force the words out, even if I know exactly what’s happening next. And I always find myself thinking ‘well, if I can just not waste time like that, I can get this story done, and this story, and this story…’, which is why I kept overcommitting and promising stuff like two 10k-word chapters/month. I think I’m finally starting to understand that it just doesn’t work like that- at least, not at this point. Those days where I just can’t write anything aren’t going to simply go away if I want it hard enough. I can’t force myself to work through them, believe me, I’ve tried every method I can find. I just have to accept that these breaks, these pauses in productivity, are just going to be a part of my personal writing process, and stop agonizing over them. Which is going to be hard. I don’t want to let anyone down, least of all, you, my generous patrons.

Ultimately, this means the $25 tier commissions are no longer going to be quite ‘monthly’ stories. I just can’t keep up with five patreon commissions/month. I’m just going to write them as quickly as I can, rotating through the commissions as I go so nobody ends up getting delayed for months on end. Thus far, I’ve had a pretty good success rate for getting three stories out per month, so going forward you can probably expect somewhere in the 2-4 chapters per month range. I may break up the cycle here and there with personal projects, if I’m feeling particularly inspired.