Chapter 35.1- Gamer of the Desert

Quest Notification! Quest Complete!

Finally taking this seriously, huh?

Objectives;

1. Survive ✔
2. Kill Onoki the Fencesitter ✔
3. Kill Orochimaru x
4. Save Hiruzen ✔

Bonus Objectives

1. Prevent Kurotsuchi from escaping x
2. Prevent Akatsuchi from escaping x
3. Kill Stone Nin (42/127)

Rewards;

1. 5000 XP ✔
2. Legendary loot roll x
3. Weighted Boulder Technique ✔
4. Stone Golem Technique ✔

Bonus Rewards;

1. Lava Release Affinity x
2. Dust Release Affinity x
3. Explosion Release Affinity x
4. Bodies of members of the explosion corps x

I loooked at the rewards with a dispassionate eye as I notec that I’d missed most of the value. Most of the real value at least, the weighted boulder and golem technique were cool, and the information that just got downloaded into my head came with a lot of ideas about the practical aspects of the move. How to implement it in combat, how to use it to fly, how to use it on others, and all that. It was fascinating, but still nothing too special. Why? I could already fucking fly.

In my opinion, that was half the utility of the jutsu right there. I mean sure, what about the ability to increase my speed or to slow down opponents by increasing their weight wouldn’t apply to a sane person? The problem there was that I could already move my sandy body quicker than my mindf could even keep up with, so my body definitely wasn’t the limiting factor. Weight didn’t matter when you had telekinetic control over your body. As for slowing down or disabling opponents by increasing their weight, I still had to touch them to make it happen, and as good as my fuinjutsu already was, in a few months, me touching anyone would be as good as a dead sentence for them.

The stone golem jutsu was even worse. It was a chakra hog, I could tell. And I could do roughly the same thing with my sand with only a quarter the chakra expenditure and even more utiliy, mobility and flexibility. It was like being given an inferior version of one of my favourite jutsus.

Maybe the actual truth was that the reason I wasn’t looking at what I got with much value was because of how valuable what I’d missed out on was. The lava release affinity would have been dead useful, but the real prizes were dust and explosion release. Sure, I didn’t have a lightning affinity, but I was dead certain that getting the kekkei genkai would come with the requisite affinity. Instead, I was stuck with two more jutsu that I’d probably almost never end up using.

I tried to put it all our of mind, and focus on the future. Now, the next steps were unclear. Sound or Stone. Suna had been getting ready for war for months now.

I’d have to declare a target and let loose the hounds sooner or later unless the hounds would go crazy in their cages and attempt to eat me. It was a terrible imagery, but no less true. The tension at the village was already close to a snapping point by the time I left. If I delayed any longer, I wouldn’t be surprised to return to a village in the midst of civil war. I’d been mandating increased training, increased the reserves, called up all the inactive ninja and asked them to begin training again, changed thew academy curriculum, and a thousand other small policy changes. Only the blind and stupid could miss that Suna was preparing for something big, and now knowing what it was had caused a lot of raised tensions.

People could only live with so much nervous energy for so long. But unfortunately, they’d have to live with it for even longer. Hiruzen and I had completed our agreement and the newly reviewed treaty between Sunagakure and Konohagakure. Now, all we needed was for our respective Daimyo to consent to the deal. The Fire Daimyo had extended an invitation to both the Wind Daimyo and I to his court for the finalising of the agreement.

Normally, I’d disdain and ignore what was essentially a summons from a rival power, but now we were allies. And Hiruzen was also extremely weak. He probably had very little time left with the hat on his head. If I fucked up and offended the fire Daimyo, I’d probably end up saddled with a new Hokage who’d go back on Hiruzen’s deal and then there’d be a war on three fronts for me to fight. I loved Suna, but we weren’t Konoha. A war on three fronts would wipe us off the map almost completely. Besides, the land that Hiruzen had essentially granted us wasn’t truly his to give. Sure, once Hiruzen ceded it to us, we could occupy it without fear because there was little the fire Daimyo could do to stop us. His armies of samurai? They wouldn’t even be fodder for our genin and chunin. It was kind of a weird situation where the Daimyo owned the land but only because Hiruzen and Konoha were there to press his claim. So while Hiruzen had no legal authority to grant the land, he had the actual authority over it.

It brought another thought to my mind though. Why didn’t he just kill the Daimyo and take the seat for himself? From my experience, that kind of thing wasn’t that hard. Not too hard for the Shinobi no Kami himself definitely. The only reason I could see for not doing it was the fact that he didn’t need to. Maybe his own Daimyo was essentially a rubber stamp. But if so, why would he issue this summons? Racking my brain over it was not doing me any good. At the end of the day, I’d find out what he wanted and what was going on. The games would reveal themselves to me sooner or later.

Suddenly, a knock rang out from the door. Surely it couldn’t be them. The message had just gone out this morning. Besides, I’d have definitely been notified if my Daimyo was within the village and on his way to my hotel room.

Before I got the opportunity to so much as reply, the door swung open, and one of the last persons I wanted to see during my trip to Konoha walked in. Danzo Shimura.

The Konoha elder with leathery skin spotted with wrinkles and a frown that looked to have been carved into his stone cold face. No expressions. No tells. No small micromovements to mark the passage of time as the seconds ticked by with us staring at each other. Stone. That was a good word for him. He looked carved out of the thing. Like a figure, an effigy. Wrapped in bandages across one end of his body, leaning heavily on a cane, but still strong and unyielding. Like stone. “Who are you? How dare you barge in here” I said, masintaining my sitting position but beginning to both flood the room with sand and preparing to transform into my sand form.

Either I was more distracted in my thoughts than I’d thought possible, or Danzo had somehow found a way around my sensing. Both of those possibilities were equally frightening.
“I am Shimura Danzo, Fifth Kazekage of Konohagakure.” He said in a voice that was just like his face. Stone cold. No inflections. None of the pride that I’d have expected accompanying a declaration like that. No expressions. So I did the one thing from my previous life that was just as useful in this one. I got on his nerves.

“Hahahahahaha” I burst into peals of laughter and giggles. I even doubled over, clenching my stomach with both arms, showing him the weakness to see if it would provoke any attack or reaction. But nothing. Not so much as a twitch. What the fuck was this man? Was this even a man?

“You are the Fourth Kazekage, an enemy to Konoha. My predecessor was weak in agreeing to a treaty with you. It is now rescinded. Do the wise thing and surrender yourself, Ichibi. Your death will go on to serve the great tree” He said, sounding like he was reading from a textbook and not basically declaring war on what was essentially his only ally in a big dark world out to get him. Another thing I wondered about was Hiruzen. Last I checked, he was alive and fine. Even had Jiraiya with him. So where was the toad sage and what was he doing.

Oh, there he is! I disassembled my lower body and flew backwards out of the hotel as Jiraiya crashed into it from above, giant rasengan in his hand. He smashed through the roof, and my penthouse suit before ending the jutsu and standing where I’d previously sat, staring at me with cold eyes that reminded me exactly of the man that walked forwards to stand right next to him. Well, shit.

“Ichibi, do not make this too difficult for yourself. Surrender or die. Now.” A voice spoke out from my side. I ignored it. Using chakra to thrown your voice was a cheap trick I’d outgrown years ago. The first time I’d fallen for it, Baki had beaten me black and blue.

And then, a hand grabbed a hold of my neck from behind before I felt myself being bound up in bandages.

A/N; Have to run. Shit really hit the fan, huh? Ignore the typos please. Still a work in progress.