B2 21-22 - Bring Tails With You and Listener Questions

Hello everyone! I think I accidentally forgot to post these chapter on Thursday of last week. To make it up to you, expect chapters on Wednesday and Friday this week. My bad.

I'll be taking a one-week break next week to relax a little, allow myself to write a little more slowly, and generally take a breath. I've been writing, on average, 4 to 5 chapters a week for the last five months, and that pace is starting to wear on me, especially because of the other thing I've been working on.

I'm sending MGU 1 to an audiobook/ebook publisher on Wednesday! I've been working hard for the last three or four weeks on editing, fixing continuity errors, making adjustments to the System, and polishing up both description and characterization. More importantly, though, I've also cut almost five thousand words from the original version to tighten the pacing through some slower parts. I'm really excited to go through this process, but it's been a ton of work, and I need the break. 

Thanks for your patience, everyone!

21 - Bring Tails With You

Thursday, January 22

- - - - -

Ilnean One ended on time, and I hurried out of the classroom to find a tunnel entrance, transformed, and took to the sky. According to a text she’d sent fifteen minutes ago, Fursona was already at the Student Union Building, and so was Theseus.

The KRTU radio station was comprised of a small glass booth, a larger waiting room with a couch and a couple of armchairs, and a closet. Avan poked his head out of the closet, then emerged with an armful of recording equipment. “Hello, Magical Girl Undergrad. Avan, though you’ll be calling me DJ Smooth. A pleasure to meet you in slower times.” He adjusted the equipment and stuck a hand out. I shook it.

“Come on in, find a seat. Your villainous co-guest is already here. I’ll get set up. Su-Bin from APPEAL said she was running late—something about a last-minute talking point—so you’ll have time to catch up. The villains say they know you two, and your friend and Theseus are not happy with each other.”

“Uh, thanks, Avan,” I said. DJ Smooth was a dumb name, and I couldn’t call him that. Not until I had to. I disappeared behind the glass and found Fursona waiting on the couch. I handed her Tails, who she tucked into her pocket. Theseus and Gourmet each had an armchair, and Theseus glared at a defiant-looking Fursona. “You realize that shit could have outed me? Having to show up for a class with the wrong arms? It’d be a goddamn disaster, and I had tests the next day.”

“Sounds like you shouldn’t let yourself be disarmed so easily,” Fursona quipped back.

Theseus breathed in. “Actually, I should thank you. You put your finger on a serious weakness, which I intend to patch up. I’ll keep a better hand-le on my limbs in the future. You can count on that.”

Okay. He was making puns. That either meant we were settling into the Superpower Ethics roles we’d been comfortable with last semester, or he was about to kick our asses. No Episode warning popped up, though, which was good because I couldn’t agree to one except in self-defense. “So, you put Fursona in the hospital, you know that?”

“Is this about the fight in the robotics building?” Su-Bin asked from the door. She stood awkwardly, arms crossed over her chest, but her stance felt like she’d go on the attack at any moment. "Haven’t you done enough to the engineering department?”

“Nope. I didn’t target anyone, and it’s not my fault some of their equipment is perfect for me.” Theseus seemed smug. He sat straight in his chair, clearly more comfortable sparring with Fursona than trading verbal barbs with Su-Bin. “You can check. Everything I did was strictly by the book; I even got Doctor Mindstorm to check it before I started, just in case it came up today. I didn’t think it would, but then Fursona here jumped in.”

“Yep. Wombat does that,” Gourmet grinned. “They’re aggressively stupid that way.”

“Hey now, Gourmet, we’re all friends here,” I said, holding up my hands appeasingly. I could not let this go south. If it did, I’d have to back off and let Fursona take whatever beating came her way. Even worse, Su-Bin would get all sorts of ammunition against us. Neither of those outcomes worked for me. “Let’s save it for the radio. That’s when we’ll discuss these points like heroes and villains.”

“With our fists?” Gourmet asked.

“Please don’t,” Avan said. He swung a boom microphone over the couch and placed another in front of each armchair. “This stuff’s expensive. We’re ready and on-air in two minutes. Please wait downstairs if you’re not part of the round table.”

Fursona stood up, gave me a quick high-five, and said, “You’ve got this. Stick to the script.” Then, before I could stop her, she left.

Tails’s head bounced up and down as Fursona hopped away. <You be careful. We’ll be here to support you if you need us.>

Gourmet stood as well, smiled menacingly at me, and nodded. “Have fun in there, snack!”

“Thanks, guys.”

“Seriously. Break a leg,”Gourmet replied. Then she was gone, and it was showtime.

Avan sat in the vacated armchair, leaving a spot on the couch for Su-Bin. She sat next to me, pointedly not looking at me or even saying hello. I took a deep breath and remembered that she wasn’t Su-Bin, and I wasn’t Annie. We were Vice-President Pak and Magical Girl Undergrad.

“We’re live in ten. Nine. Eight…”

◄▼►

“Three, two, one. And we’re back. That was Flying Donkeys with ‘Outside Your Eyes,’ and before that, we heard from Metal Aeroplane and The Belief Cycle,” Avan rattled off. His whole personality had…well, not shifted, but tweaked. His smarm felt more in character now; his confidence and easygoing attitude fit perfectly as a radio host.

“Now, we’ve got a very special set of guests for this week’s interview. A few weeks ago, I received an on-air call from a superhero named Fursona. They wanted to know if I’d be willing to host their fellow superhero for an interview. Naturally, my gears started turning. I said yes and pitched the idea of a round table discussion. Getting my guests in the same room without starting a fight has been challenging, but listeners, I’m happy to present the latest installment of ‘Smooth Talk with DJ Smooth.’”

He pointed at me. “My first guest is a superhero and freshman at Tokyexico University. She recently had a pair of…explosive…episodes to wrap up her show, Small Town Super, and she’s here to explain what happened in them, some behind-the-scenes of how superhero work…well, works, and to pitch her new show, Heroics 101. It’s Magical Girl Understudy.” He pressed an applause button, filling the waiting room with canned clapping. This looked like it’d be quite a production.

“Thank you for having me,” I said. Keep it polite and brief. Don’t draw attention.

“You’re very welcome. My second guest is a little more villainous but arguably more important to the safety of students on campus. Theseus is a villain—but not only that, he’s been fighting against the D-wolvers’ incursions onto our campus. He’s going to talk about villainy, why it works, why he’s necessary, and about Man vs. Nature. Please give him a warm welcome and your wallets!” Avan pressed the applause button again.

Theseus nodded. “Thanks.”

“It’d be an unfair round table with only super perspectives, though, so we have a special third guest this afternoon. As part of the Anti-Power Protestors’ and Extras’ Advancement League, Su-Bin Pak believes that superpowers should be banned, restricted, or regulated much more heavily than they are right now. Her ideas put her and APPEAL as an organization at odds with heroes, villains, and Ilneats, but do her points have merit?” A third round of applause filled the air.

“Thank you. Let’s get into it.” Vice-President Pak pulled out a bottle of soda and glared at me. At me!

“I agree. Let’s get into it. We’re opening the lines for questions in a few minutes, but for now, I’d like to start with a game of mad libs. I’m going to read a sentence. You’ll each fill in the blank with a word at the same time, then explain your word. Here’s the first sentence. ‘Superheroes on campus are a….”

“Threat.”

“Bunch of punching bags.”

“Necessary to stop villains,” I said. I recognized Su-Bin’s plan, but Theseus almost seemed to be making light of the whole thing. What was his strategy?

“Interesting. Let’s go to Theseus first. You said, ‘Bunch of punching bags.’ Care to elaborate?”

“Yes.” Theseus smirked at me. “I’m a freshman on campus, and I’ve been in a few episodes on campus. All four times, the heroes who tried to stop me failed. Not only that, but I destroyed them. I expected better when I came here. It’s good that the learning opportunities outweigh the fights, or I’d ask for my money back.”

“But there are advantages to being a villain on campus, correct?”

“Like I said, I’m learning a lot, which advances my goals. And since the university studio pays for damages, I don’t have to worry about being in my villain persona on campus. My debts get paid, my guilt gets washed away, and I can attend superpower classes as a vil instead of a disguised vigilante.”

“I see.” Avan nodded, seemingly thoughtful. “Speaking of damages, Miss Pak, you said superheroes on campus were a threat. What do you mean by that?”

That was a softball setup if I’d ever seen one, but I stuck to my script and held my tongue while Su-Bin answered. “In the last three months, we’ve had multiple superpowered fights break out at the Engineering and Applied Sciences building, all due to the same superheroine—the same one joining us for this round table. The total damages are close to thirty-five million dollars, not including the time students lost on their projects and the tuition value lost by students repeating part of a semester. More importantly, these fights haven’t been safe for students. Destroying buildings, trashing weight rooms, and wrecking public spaces all put unpowered students at risk while supers play their games.”

“I see. And how would you respond to that, Magical Girl Understudy? Why, in light of that, are superheroes necessary on campus?”

Su-Bin was inflating the numbers, but I couldn’t let that get to me. I took a deep breath to steady myself. “Miss Pak thinks superheroics on campus are a threat. I agree that there’s a threat to student safety, but I believe it’s the villains causing it. My nemesis, Professor Panic, took over the TUEAS Building she referenced, using a lair in its basement to create a robot army. Who knows what kind of damage he’d have caused without me stopping him? Then, when I beat him, he destroyed the whole building to escape. As Theseus can confirm, my sidekick and I were buried in the rubble and had to fight past a D-wolver to escape.

“Speaking of Theseus, he’s proven to be almost as damaging as my fight with Professor Panic—who’s in Almhurst now, by the way—but with strictly self-motivated goals. He’s defaced art from Roth Arena, destroyed the robotics department’s labs, and more—all with the goal of becoming a lieutenant for some villain. Who knows what else he’d destroy without heroes to hold him accountable.” That was more than I’d intended to say, but Bianca couldn’t be mad; my whole speech followed the script perfectly.

“I can tell we’re in for a feisty round table today, ladies and gentlemen. Let’s take a moment to dig deeper into this one before we complete another sentence.” Avan smiled and pointed at Su-Bin. “Miss Pak, you argue that superheroes cause more destruction than villains?”

“Not exactly. My argument is that villains and heroes cause the most destruction and crime together. By letting them not only live on campus but funding their activities, paying for their damages, and providing them with lairs, Tokyexico University tacitly approves of their dominance in Earth’s society and the illegal activities they’re responsible for.”

“I see. And, Magical Girl Understudy, your response?”

Avan wanted to play us against each other, I realized. He wantedme to melt down about my episodes on air. That’s why he’d bounced right to me. I didn’t have to play his game, though. “I’d like a world without supervillains, too, Miss Pak, but that’s not the world we live in. Right now, I don’t know any Extras—sorry, unpowered people—who can stand up to a minor league villain, much less a big shot like Haze-Matt or Lord Destructo. So it makes sense for Tokyexico University to finance heroes.”

“But not villains. They shouldn’t be subsidizing powered students over Extras—“Su-Bin insisted on using the term, highlighting my self-correction, “—to begin with, and they subsidize both heroes and villains. The amount of scholarship money that flows into superpowered students’ coffers from the school is astronomical.”

Avan cleared his throat. “Thank you both for clarifying. We’ll have more questions about the money later since it’s usually all about money, right? But for now, let’s fill in another blank. ‘Legally speaking, heroes and villains should be more…”

“Accountable. Especially villains.”

“Regulated.”

“Free.”

And on and on it went. My neck stiffened, and my hands got sweaty as Su-Bin alternated between attacking supers in general and attacking me. Theseus was unapologetically villainous, but the time wasn’t right to bring up the video we’d posted. Not yet, at least. And I tried to play the ‘we’re necessary’ angle, but I couldn’t tell if it was landing or not.

Finally, after nearly ten minutes of back-and-forth built on the fill-in-the-blank game, Avan cleared his throat. “Alright, we’ve had a good start to our conversation, but I’d like to take things a little off-script. We’re opening up the phone lines for listener questions!”

◄▼►

22 - Listener Questions

‘Keep to the script,” Bianca had told me repeatedly. And, up until now, I’d done an excellent job of it, but we hadn’t gotten a good read on DJ Smooth’s audience. I didn’t know if they loved superheroes or if they’d rather see APPEAL get their way. I couldn’t tell the audience turnout because Avan hadn’t done a superhero interview since we’d talked to him.

I grit my teeth and clenched my fists, waiting for hardball call-ins from Su-Bin’s friends with APPEAL. But that’s not what happened, at least not at first.

“Su-Bin, you’re a member of APPEAL, right? How do you explain the crime rates from before Launch Day compared to the lower overall rates right now?”

Su-Bin took a minute to think. “Well, that’s a great question. I can’t speak for people like The Pherris Report, but when the TU branch of APPEAL talks about crime rates, we’re not referring to bike theft or white-collar crimes. We’re specifically talking about violent or flashy crimes, like stealing the arms off a famous weightlifter’s poster or blowing up a building.”

“Sounds like you’re cherry-picking,” Theseus interrupted.

“Hey now, this question’s for Miss Pak only,” I said, thinking fast. The questioner had found a weak point in APPEAL’s rhetoric. And I could exploit it the same way Theseus wanted to. But my position wasn’t any less precarious, and questions might come my way. I needed the protection that keeping questions focused on their answerers afforded more than I needed Su-Bin to lose here.

Also, she was my friend. I didn’t want her to lose badly. I just wanted to come out of this looking good myself.

“Thank you for interrupting, both of you,” Avan said. He didn’t look put out either way. “Some questions will be for more than one responder, but that one was aimed at Miss Pak specifically. Here’s one for Magical Girl Undergrad and Theseus.

“I did some research and learned you both follow a similar code of ethics. How can heroes and villains share the same codes? Doesn’t that lend itself to the argument that there’s no real difference between heroes and villains and that they’re all just playing the same game?”

Theseus held up his hand before I could respond. I saw him smile before he answered. “I’ll open, and the hero can follow up. For my most recent heist, I attacked a robotics lab, as has been mentioned. It would have been easiest to blow up a wall, waltz in, and finish my arms deal while the cops surrounded the building, then fight my way out. I’m very good at fighting. But our code of ethics forbids vils from hurting Extras without justification, so I broke in quietly instead. It would have been a clean heist if it weren’t for Fursona’s interference, too.”

Damn. Theseus was much too clever for a supposed meathead bruiser. He’d maneuvered me into a trap, and I didn’t have a way out. I couldn’t drop the video reveal here because it’d feel like Fursona had caused the destruction—he’d preemptively defended himself. And I couldn’t contradict him on our Code of Conduct because he hadn’t said anything untrue. I didn’t have a choice but to defend him here.

“It’s true. We developed our Code of Ethics over a semester of watching superheroes and villains behaving irresponsibly in episodes that aired edited and ones that were never broadcast. Our Superpower Ethics class is literally designed to get hero and villain behavior under control in a voluntary way, without needing something like the theoretical New Gotham Accords to regulate supers. We took the experiences of other heroes and villains, learned from them, and wrote a code of ethics that addressed as many of the problems we’d seen as possible without being impossible to use.”

Theseus interrupted. “Magical Girl Understudy and I were on the same team. We worked hard to keep the process fair to both heroes, villains, and the studios we’re contracted to. Does that mean villains still do bad things? Absolutely. But a villain with a good code of conduct doesn’t hurt people intentionally, at least not without purpose. So, to answer your question, there is a difference, and it’s written into our code of conduct.”

Avan clapped his hands once, sounding like Professor Tennyson for a moment. “We’ll ask for that Code of Ethics and see if we can get it posted to the ‘Smooth Talk with DJ Smooth’ website after our show. And now, our next question, for Magical Girl Understudy.”

“Are you ashamed of having your personal drama leak into your superhero life? The last moments of ‘Absent-Hearted Professor’ laid bare your relationship with Professor Panic, which seems wildly unprofessional.”

My jaw dropped. I hadn’t thought thatwould come up. It seemed so minor compared to everything else, but now I realized it was a wound—a very pokeable wound. Of course someone would give it a jab eventually. I steadied myself as I tried to think of what to say. Then I cleared my throat.

“This…being a superhero doesn’t give many opportunities to find a partner you can be totally honest with. If a super dates an Extra, there’s always that one thing you can’t tell them. It’s not a healthy place for a relationship. Professor Panic was the only person in my small town who got me for a long time, and over months of fighting, we grew closer due to this shared secret. That doesn’t excuse what happened, and it wouldn’t have happened if he and I hadn’t been seeing each other, but that’s not something I can change.”

I paused for a moment, holding up a hand to signal I wasn’t finished. “What I can say is that when the time came for Professor Panic to face justice, I didn’t try to shield him. He’s in Almhurst, and I hope he gets the rehabilitation he needs and can start atoning for what he did in response to our relationship falling apart. And I hope I’ve learned something from this as well. Villains might be, in some regards, coworkers, but they’re not personal friends or possible partners.”

“I see,” Avan said. “And our next question goes to Miss Pak.”

I relaxed as the caller asked her about joining APPEAL. It was an obvious set-up question designed to pitch the story, but at least I could chill out for a minute. Catch my breath. Gain my composure again. Su-Bin prattled on for a bit about the TU branch and the wider, world-spanning organization. Then it was my turn again.

“How do you justify Lab Assistant Panic?”

“I…Look, not all heroes are perfect bastions of justice and truth. I live up to that standard as best I can with the costumes I use, but Lab Assistant Panic has some powers I can’t get elsewhere. That costume has some serious drawbacks—I’m sure you’re talking about the end of ‘TUEAS Dogpile.’ But I justify it by using her sparingly, accessing the skills I need while I have control, and then switching back. Lab Assistant Panic is part of the toolkit, not a defining aspect of me as a hero.”

“She’s still a villain, and you’ve lost control of her twice,” Su-Bin interrupted.

“Hey, that wasn’t your question, Miss Pak,” Avan said, and I grinned internally. One more win for Understudy!

◄▼►

“Any last words before we end the show? Miss Pak?” Avan asked.

“Yes, a reminder that APPEAL’s TU branch is accepting new members. If you want to make a difference and take back our world, APPEAL may be for you.”

“And Theseus?”

“No. I said what I said.”

“Ooookay. And finally, Magical Girl Undergrad?”

“Yes. Don’t forget that you have the superpowers of kindness, love, and respect for each other. And, not to shamelessly plug, but check out Heroics 101! It’s my studio’s new show, and it’s been a blast so far!” I said, squeezing in that last-minute pitch.

“Got it! I’m sure many of us will tune in,” Avan said. He clapped his hands once. “This has been ‘Smooth Talk with DJ Smooth.’ Tune in next week when we’ll talk to the school’s gymnastics coach about TU’s athletic legacy, injuries, and performance enhancement use on campus.”

He pushed a button on his equipment and relaxed in his armchair. “And that’s a wrap. Thank you all for coming and for such an interesting conversation. It seemed like you each had goals, and I hope you all accomplished them.”

I nodded slowly and stood up, the adrenaline burning off as I headed for the door. My feet moved methodically down the stairs toward where Fursona waited. But when I got there, she was nowhere to be found. I checked my phone.

<Hey. Flare Episode. Be by your place after. Tails w/ me - Fursona 3:56>

<Hope it went well - Fursona 3:57>

<Thanks. Went fine. Good luck w/ Flare - Understudy 4:05>

It had gone fine. Not perfectly, no. But with Theseus and Su-Bin there and with audience questions, perfection was never an option. I sat in the Student Union Building’s atrium to get my bearings and decide what to do next.

“Well, Snack, you didn’t break any legs? Disappointing,” Gourmet said. She sat across the little table from me.

“Hi to you too, Gourmet. What do you want?” With the adrenaline gone, I didn’t have the energy for this. I needed her to spit it out.

“I got rid of Fursona for a bit, and Theseus won’t be around.” Gourmet looked from side to side anyway, a paranoid, unsure feeling to her movements. “I want to collaborate on another Episode, just like last semester. But this time, it might turn into an ongoing thing, so I don’t want Theseus or Fursona involved,” Gourmet said seriously. “It’s got potential, and we wouldn’t need to fight each other, which is good for you. I know you can’t afford the losses right now, and neither can I.”

“What’s with the attitude change?” I asked. Gourmet had always been a goof last semester; her whole thing was that she’d never be minor league material, but I couldn’t figure out if she’d meant her weight, appearance, or power set. I’d shoved her out of my mind for a while, but clearly, something had happened.

Gourmet sighed and seemed to deflate in her seat. “I don’t want to talk about it, but life comes at you pretty fast, and I’m gonna need some money. I could smash and grab with Theseus, but he’s drawing the wrong kind of attention to himself. He wants a career. I just want to run a couple of quick, cheesy Episodes to meet some upcoming expenses. It’ll be this semester sometime. You in?”

I nodded. My line about villains not being good friend candidates was bullshit, and I knew it now. “What do I need to do?”

“Not much.” Gourmet tore off a bit of her costume and handed it to me. I whistled, impressed. She’d done her research. “Just take the scrap to your producer, get the costume built, and wait. Don’t use it in an Episode. Get used to the powers, but if you use it to fight, the deal’s off. It’s an alternative build I’ve been working on. Oh, and it’s a loaner. I’m gonna want the scrap back when we’re done.”

“Got it. Uh, nothing too illegal, right?”

“Having second thoughts? No. Short-term kidnapping, maybe a little extortion, vandalism, and airwave theft. No big deal, right?”

“Uh, right.” I took the sleeve scrap. I didn’t have to accept the Episode when it happened. I could always back out if it felt wrong or turn the tables on Gourmet if it went off the rails halfway through. “I’ve got studying to do. See you around.”

“Good luck, and thanks.”

I waited in the green room for Fursona to return, staring at her whiteboard. The marker was right there, so I crossed out ‘KRTU’ under ‘PR.’ I’d had enough of that—the backstabbing, the spying, and the politicking on air—and I needed a break to run some Episodes and get my community rank up. I checked the calendar; Spring Break was still months away.

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