45 - Lady Lockless

“Was this place designed by architecture students?” Fursona complained as we wandered the halls after Flare. I couldn’t help but agree with them. The halls weren’t even straight lines. Instead, they seemed to weave around office spaces, zig-zagging nonsensically around the building. Luckily, the place was signed well—otherwise, I could see the professors getting lost on the way to their offices.

We stopped outside Office Suite 765. Fursona fidgeted on their paws, hand inches from the door handle. “So, Squirt, what’s the plan?”

“Stop it, Wombat.” I transformed back into my Understudy Costume. Rainy Day’s [Ride the Lightning’s] damage was higher than [Stellar Ray] or [Spotlight Strike]. I still didn’t know if it hit for two or three superhero damage—I’d guess two since it didn’t kill the henchman I’d fried—but it only had two uses per Act. And I’d used them, which left me with only Understudy’s powers. They’d been enough for years against…Peter. Professor Panic.

I swallowed painfully. They’d be enough now.

“You okay, Understudy?” Fursona asked. I heard a touch of concern through the modulator. It was quite a shift from their teasing when I’d been Rainy Day. They knew I’d…broken up with—I couldn’t think ‘dumped’—Peter. They were just checking up on me.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” That was a lie, but I shoved that thought to the back of my head. I was fine, and we had a job to do. “Okay, game plan. We have to get in there and pressure Flare until he gives up or goes down. Hopefully, we’ll catch Lady Lockless in there too, and we can take them both down.”

“Alright. As long as you’re fine.”

“I’m good.”

“We don’t have to do this, you know? We can call it if you’re not ready.”

“No. We’re doing this. We’ll get up close with Flare and give him too much to think about. He’s a little-league villain, I think. Right, Tails?”

<Nyah! He’s currently ranked 413/523 in the city. Lady Lockless is 213/523 and a meowner league villain, but she recently lost against a rank 450ish hero in a straight fight. She’s not a combat villain, so don’t worry about her.>

“Thanks. Tails says he’s little league. We can probably fluster him and get him off-balance, so we’ll fight him in close. Just don’t let him get moving, or he’ll probably escape. He seems like a speedster with one gimmick attack. You’re a speedster/bruiser hybrid. Neither of us is catching him if he runs.”

Fursona nodded and got ready to jump into the room. I grabbed the door handle, narrowing my eyes. We were going to win. We had to. I had to. Fursona nodded, and I opened the door. Fursona leaped into the room feet-first.

“Boss, they’re he—oof!” Flare started to shout just before he caught Fursona’s paws. Both of them. To the chest. He stepped back a single pace, coughing. “I can’t let you in. Lady Lockless will fire me. This is my one chance, and I’m not letting you take it from me!”

I opened my mouth to warn Fursona, but it was too late. Flare’s fist sparked as he drove it into the kangaroo’s stomach, just above our brochures! The cardboard burst into flame, and they patted their stomach desperately to put themselves out.

“[Stellar Ray]!” The pale blue light surged from my wand, catching Flare on the shoulder.

[Dramatic Damage! +1 Drama Point Pending]

He jerked back like he’d been punched and slid back into a defensive posture. I swished my wand again as Fursona circled, but before I could find a window, Flare shouted, “Is it getting hot in here!?” A flickering red flame manifested over one arm,  heat pouring from it in waves.

Fursona backed off, shielding their face from the inferno. I screamed in frustration. If we couldn’t keep up the pressure, he could move however he wanted. Every instinct said to cover the door against his escape.

[Inkling] said to pressure. That there wasn’t time to be defensive.

I didn’t want to guard the door anyways, so I followed the battle plan I’d set out. [Spotlight Strike] marked his extended arm. The one that was on fire. The dumbest possible place to attack.

I hesitated. But I needed a win. I hadn’t succeeded at anything since I got here. We’d tied against Jumper, lost to Gourmet and Theseus, and scraped out a scripted win at Tottergarten. Classes weren’t great. And Peter…

I dashed toward him. Flare turned, and the heat almost physically shoved at me. But I got a hit in, slamming my fist against his elbow. He flinched, waving his arm in pain, and the fire went out with a pop that scorched my skin. “It’s time to cool down, Flare!”

[Good Thinking! +1 Cunning Point Pending]

[Stylish Strike! +1 Flamboyance Point Pending]

[HP 3/7]

[True Grit! +1 Grit Point Pending]

With the flame aura gone, Flare dashed for the open door, but Fursona got there first. He ran into the kangaroo hero, and they crashed to the ground, kicking, punching, and headbutting each other. I started toward them.

A door creaked open behind me. I turned on a heel, skirt swishing, to face the new challenger. Lady Lockless.

“Stop at once! Coppers, unhand my lieutenant!” She was wiry—built like a twig, even, but tall. The striped black-and-white ballgown she wore brushed the floor, and she held a walking stick in her hand. No. A cane.

A very, very stylish cane with a key on its end and a glass cube that hung from the handle by a chain.

She pointed it at the door, which clicked shut. Fursona had the upper hand against Flare. At least, I thought they did. So I squared off against the minor league villain. A camera drone hovered between us, and I wished I had [Maniacal Reveal] ready.

“I assure you, Miss Magical Girl, that you don’t wish to fight me,” Lockless said. “So many other villains are doing worse things than I ever could. I’m practically a Robin Hood by comparison.”

<She’s stolen from at least six banks and a credit union in the last year. It’s even in Episodes,> Tails interjected. <No orphanages or charities saw any of it, either.>

“Sorry, Lockless. I can’t let you go. I need this win.”

“Shame.” Lockless swung the cane at me, but I’d just been fighting Flare, and she was slow by comparison. I stepped back, and the key sipped past my nose with a hiss.

I countered with a punch—not a [Spotlight Strike], but a punch to the face. She awkwardly spun away from the blow and smashed her cane handle into my stomach. I felt it, but…my HP didn’t drop.

“The [Key to Lockpicking] is knowing how to exploit weaknesses,” Lady Lockless said, and her cane glowed. I knew her next hit was going to hurt.

Unless she didn’t get another hit. “I know how to find weaknesses too! [Spotlight Strike]!” For the first time, the spotlight couldn’t pick a spot. I stared as it spun wildly across Lady Lockless’s dress and arms. Was her whole body a weak spot?

I charged in and swung. My fist crashed into her chest, and she went flying. Her cane clattered to the floor beside her, and she groaned in pain.

[Stylish Strike! +1 Flamboyance Point Pending]

[Double Damage! +1 Badass Point Pending]

Double damage? Not a critical hit. Not a villain with a known weakness, like Icee-Freez and heat attacks. Just raw double damage. How weak was Lady Lockless anyways?

She scrambled to her feet and clutched her fancy cane, wheezing. “Enough…of this. Let’s see how you handle…the [Escape Room]!”

“The what?” I asked. But before I could get an answer, my vision collapsed into a pinprick—just like when Rocko brought me to the studio. I could hear Fursona asking a similar question and Flare shouting something at Lady Lockless, but his voice slowed down more and more as my vision faded until it was just a loud, deep drone in the background.

◄▼►

When my vision cleared, Fursona and I stood in a room with a glass ceiling and walls. I could see gigantic, blurry figures slowly moving above us. One wore black and white stripes, while the other was black with a hint of orange. Flare’s droning voice wouldn’t stop. It just went on and on, buzzing in the back of my head like a swarm of bees. What was with all the bees, anyway? Magical Girl Honeycomb, and the droning voice, and Bianca. Bianca was pretty cool. And cute.

“Understudy, what’s going on? What is this?” Fursona sounded confused. They kept glancing up at the enormous figures above them.

I didn’t blame them. I felt my breaths coming faster and faster as the combat adrenalin burned off, and I realized we’d probably lost. Whatever Lady Lockless had done, I’d never experienced anything like it. I sat down on the floor. “I don’t know. She called the power [Escape Room]. I think we’re trapped in her cane.”

“Oh! That’s it?” Fursona laughed and started looking around the room. “I’ve heard of those. They were a big thing when my parents were kids. So, we’re gonna need to solve the puzzles to leave. There’s usually a ‘first hint’ somewhere obvious if Lady Lockless follows the rules. And sometimes there’s a time limit.”

I took a deep, shaky breath. “We don’t have time for this, Fursona. They’re getting away. We’re going to lose!”

“Don’t worry about that.” They pointed up. The two gigantic villains hadn’t moved, and the droning hadn’t changed much. They seemed to be in slow motion. “I think we have plenty of time.”

Standing up, I sucked in another breath. This one felt better, especially when I saw the camera drone with us inside the [Escape Room]. Whatever Lady Lockless had done, the Episode wasn’t over. It hadn’t even gone to Act Three, which made sense. The Episode was ‘You’re Super-Suited For This Job,’ not ‘Lady Lockless Steals a Speech’ or something. “What’s the first clue, then?”

“Let’s look around.”

There wasn’t much to see. It took only a few seconds to glance over everything. Colorful crates covered half of the room; Fursona sat on one, staring at a bookshelf filled with brightly-bound hardcovers with no labels. A kitchen counter lined an entire glass wall, set up to make…a salad? And on the fourth wall was nothing except a sign saying “Do Not Break.”

I decided to take that one seriously. Only Livestream broke the fourth wall.

Fursona pulled a rope hanging from the ceiling, and words lit up on the floor.

First color first, then second last,

Fifth third, third fifth, fourth stands steadfast,

Seventh comes after its mother and before its father,

And sixth is second to last still, the first and fifth’s daughter.

“It’s a color riddle, Fursona said. They pointed at the bookshelf, where seven books sat on the shelf. “Red, orange, yellow, green, blue, indigo, and violet.”

“So, first is red.” I grabbed the red book and pulled on it. It didn’t come off the shelf. Instead, something clicked.

“Then fourth, because it talks about it being second?” Fursona pulled the green book, and both slid back into their spots. The glass ceiling made a slight cracking sound. “I guess there’s no time limit, but we only get so many attempts. It’s like playing Hangman or something.”

“Okay. Okay, Understudy, you can do this. I need an [Inkling].” But the power wouldn’t activate. Both my [Inklings] for Act Two had already triggered. It was just Fursona and me against the [Escape Room].

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