Ask the Crew! [Conker]
Added 2024-07-17 21:00:03 +0000 UTCYou've heard all about the gang, but now it's time to ask them whatever's on your mind! Or just... say something at them, and see how they react! Most questions will get a reply, but the best ones may get a drawing alongside them!
This week's quizzee is Conker! Everyone, give a big round of applause to our returning star!
Applause rouses from backstage, but no one walks on stage.
The curtains get beat and tossed around as something brews backstage...
Come on out, Conker! Everyone's dying to see you!
A plump red squirrel finally stumbles on stage - thrown on stage, one might say.
He struggles to stand up on his feet. It's clear he's had a drink or two...
"Shh-shut... Get your hands off me!
I'm fine, damnit..."
He finally gets a good look at his audience.
His expression mellows out a bit, but he's still... inebriated.
He suppresses a burp, then holds on to the microphone stand.
"Ugh..."
"Look, don't fuckin' judsge me.
No one told me I wan... I was doing this stupid thing..."
"Name's Conker. I'm... -hic-
I'm... Conker.
... I don't know what the hell else I'm s'pposed to say."
"Just shoot your damn questions, or whatevrrs..."
Comments
Got any fun late-night stories from your childhood? Like sneaking out of the house at night to hang out with friends?
SUPEREEVEEMASTER
2025-02-08 00:11:17 +0000 UTCWhy beer over wine?
SUPEREEVEEMASTER
2025-02-08 00:10:28 +0000 UTCC: "If spirits weren't so expensive, I'd have them all the time. Scotch, vodka, sake... tequila, too. Rum is kinda boring, but it's fine. Just don't give me whiskey – that stuff tastes like dirty sock water." *Conker grabs his belly fat and sighs.* "I used to be a lightweight, so it was cheaper to get a proper buzz. But, well... I'm not getting slimmer anytime soon. Nowadays, it's beer usually – I usually have stouts, but a honey lager can be nice too. So... Are you offering, or not?"
HolloNut
2024-09-14 18:22:38 +0000 UTCC: "'What happened to it?' Nothing, as far as I know. It's still the same old – same bartender, same customers. I live upstairs now. It creaks all the time and there's not a lotta hot water, but it's cheap. The guy's an old pal of mine, so he cut me a deal... I help him out every now and then. I clean up the tables and the dishes on busy nights, and sometimes I handle the bar. That's about it, I guess."
HolloNut
2024-09-14 18:00:59 +0000 UTChttps://www.patreon.com/posts/112059608
HolloNut
2024-09-14 17:51:13 +0000 UTChttps://www.patreon.com/posts/do-you-have-fur-108703834
HolloNut
2024-09-14 16:52:47 +0000 UTCHey Conker! Do you see yourself as more of a Beer, Mixed Drink or straight-up Spirits kinda dude?
Drake Arlin
2024-08-14 22:04:21 +0000 UTCWhatever happened to the Cock and Plucker pub?
AzzyPup
2024-07-26 06:17:56 +0000 UTCWould Berri be happy to see you like this?
AzzyPup
2024-07-26 00:04:26 +0000 UTC*Conker's nonchalant expression shifts as he furrows his brow, and his gaze sharpens towards you. You can tell his fur is standing on end after hearing these words...* C: "... I don't know where the hell you heard that, but you'd better not mention it around me ever again." *His attitude changed completely... It's obvious the words have summoned something unpleasant lurking inside him. Just as he was about to turn away, he stops and gives you a brief look back... and he leans in to whisper.* C: "All I'll say is this: 'The King is dead. Long live nobody.'"
HolloNut
2024-07-23 23:17:19 +0000 UTCC: "I'm not *constantly* drunk, mate. I just... Yeah, I like a drink every now and then, 'cause it helps me relax and stop worrying about stuff. But... if I was drunk constantly, I'd be super broke. Booze is expensive, man. Not that I'm rich or anything... Drinking's an expensive habit, so I try to make the most of it when I— -hic- ... You didn't hear that."
HolloNut
2024-07-23 23:01:44 +0000 UTCC: "Rock. Or, 'classic rock', that is. Guns 'n' Roses, Nirvana, Radiohead... You know the ones. Led Zeppelin and Pink Floyd... Why not. King Gizzard, Simon & Garfunkel... I guess some of those are not 'classic rock', but I like them all the same. There's a lot more I like, but these are the ones you're more likely to know, heh. Not that I know you or anything... It's nice to be back home, in bed, and just... listen to some old tunes like that. It helps me go to bed too... get my mind off of everything."
HolloNut
2024-07-23 22:57:51 +0000 UTCC: "I'm really not crazy about fruit. Wine's got fruit, but I hate wine... Lemonade is disgusting, pretty much like all citrus. I'm allergic to apples. ... I barely eat fruit, heh. I don't like anything fruity, really. Oh, hang on... Tomatoes are fruits, yeah? I'll go for a Bloody Caesar, then. That's my kinda fruity drink."
HolloNut
2024-07-23 22:49:46 +0000 UTCC: "'Most recent', huh... Does three years ago count as 'recent'? If so, taking my girlfriend Berri for a ride on a Sunday. We wouldn't go anywhere in particular, we'd just get in the car and go downtown... and do whatever looked like fun. 'Spur of the moment' kinda stuff... Go watch a movie, go buy some trinkets at the flea market, get some candy from those candy machines... go bowling, or go to an arcade, or play pool... It gave her a reason to stop doing her art stuff for a moment. And after all that, we usually... uh... -sigh- ... Never mind. Not to be a downer, but life sucks anyway."
HolloNut
2024-07-23 22:43:45 +0000 UTCDo you have a dedicated fur-care routine? That bushy tail seems like a lot to manage!
Regal Alliance
2024-07-18 03:41:44 +0000 UTCAre you still King of all the Land of did you leave the throne to someone else?
AzzyPup
2024-07-18 03:20:23 +0000 UTCFavorite music?
SUPEREEVEEMASTER
2024-07-18 00:36:02 +0000 UTCWhat's your favorite "fruity" drink?
RandoBear
2024-07-17 22:43:57 +0000 UTCHey Conker, what's your most recent guilty pleasure?
Tsarin
2024-07-17 21:52:49 +0000 UTCIs you being drunk Context Sensitive or is it just your constant state of being?
AzzyPup
2024-07-17 21:05:40 +0000 UTC
