Kronk's New Uniform

The first illustration of July is here!

The palace seemed more ominous than usual to Kronk. Perhaps the dark feeling he got had more to do with the circumstances of his palace visit rather than the building's physical nature. He had recently been responsible for helping Yzma, his former boss, attempt an assassination on the emperor after all. While that same emperor had pardoned Kronk, he was now requesting a personal audience with him.

Kronk found himself remembering how some "personal audiences" with his majesty ended with someone being thrown out of a window.

"But...but...Kuzco said we were cool." Kronk thought to himself as he approached the massive doors to the throne room. "I mean...yeah, the whole llama thing might be a little hard to get over but..."

The throne room doors opened.

"Kronk! My hunky main man! I thought I could hear your fretting out there," Kuzco said as he made his way over to Kronk. He pushed the larger man into the room. "Get on in here ya big lug! We've got things to discuss."

Any protests Kronk may have made were cut off by the doors slamming closed behind him. He now found himself alone in the throne room with the emperor and two guards.

"Kronk my dude. You're probably wondering why I've summoned you here." Kuzco spoke as he rummaged through some parchment.

"Well I mean...yeah." Kronk responded. "After that whole llama thing I thought you'd never wanna see me again."

Kuzco stopped his rummaging and looked up at Kronk. "Oh yes. The whole...llama...thing. Ha ha ha." He laughed with no mirth whatsoever.

Kronk gulped.

A smile appeared on Kuzco's face. "Not to worry my man. Water under the bridge. All is forgiven." He seemed to find what he was looking for among the parchments. "Actually, not only are you forgiven but you're also being rewarded!"

"Re...rewarded?"

"Yeah huh! Tell me what you think of this!" The emperor said as he presented Kronk with a scroll that bore the royal seal.

"Well...um...it sure is official looking. What is it?"

"It's...well you know what. It'll probably be easier to just show you. Do me a favor and raise your hands above your head."

Kronk obeyed his emperor's request. "Like this?"

"Perfect," Kuzco said. He snapped his fingers and Kronk felt the hands of the emperor's guards grab a hold of his outfit. In one quick motion, Kronk’s clothes were pulled off over his head. He looked down and saw his lucky purple thong worn for just the occasion.

Kronk let out a high-pitched scream and clasped his hands down over his crotch.

Kuzco giggled and steepled his hands together as he surveyed the sight before him.

"Whoa! Very nice underwear there my dude. Me likey! Me likey a lot!"

Kronk felt light-headed as he began blushing uncontrollably. "Ku...Kuzco? What...what's going on?"

"Well, you see my thonged friend..." He tapped Kronk's exposed pecs with the scroll "This here is a royal proclamation. I'm gonna make you the official right hand man to the emperor!"

"I...you...what?"

"That's right Kronky! You're gonna be my right hand man! My on-call hunk!"

"That's...really kind of you. But...uh...what about...this?" Kronk indicated his forcibly undressed state.

"Oh, that." Kuzco waved his hand as if it was no big deal. "I couldn't have you wearing the same old rags you wore while serving Yzma. You need something more suitable. I was going to have the royal tailor whip up something for you but..."

Kronk felt something terrible was about to happen. "But...what?"

"Honestly...I think I like what I'm seeing here,” Kuzco said as he admired Kronk. “Very minimalistic. Functional. Not to mention fun to look at.”

"You...you can't be serious! You want me to wear nothing but my underwear to work each day!?”

"No, of course not!" Kuzco declared with a self-satisfied grin. He then snapped his fingers a second time.

Kronk felt the massive hands of the guards gently take a hold of his thong and pull it down to his ankles. With little effort, the thong was coaxed off his feet.

Kronk looked down at his exposed bits and then back up to the emperor. Kuzco was busy grinning as he ogled the naked man before him.

Kronk prepared to scream again.

"Ah ah ah! None of that now!" Kuzco said, placing his finger to Kronk's mouth. "You're the Emperor's new right hand man. Can't have you screaming like a little girl now can we?"

Kronk swallowed the scream and opted for a little whimper instead.

"Much better,'' Kuzco said with a grin. “Now, my nudified friend..." he clapped his hand around Kronk's shoulder and led him towards an archway covered with a curtain. "We have a whole kingdom to introduce my right hand man to!"

The emperor snapped his fingers a final time and the curtain was pulled back to reveal a balcony looking down upon the city packed with a huge crowd screaming with delight upon seeing the two men.

Their beloved emperor and a naked hunk! What wasn't worth shouting about?

Kuzco basked in the public adoration while Kronk just stood there frozen.

Most of the capital was down there. Down there looking at him. Down there looking at him naked.

Kronk finally reacted.

...He fainted.

Story written by fellow patron and friend Sid!