B3 C33: Now You've Just Made It Weird

Despite the fact that Dark Magic was class aligned, jumping two levels wasn’t something I could do over the course of a day. While that might have been the case in the Novice rank, I was finally hitting the point where levels were starting to get hard to come by.

Still, over the next two weeks, I saw growth in all of my spell classes and in all of my Initiate spells. All of them — even my lesser used spells — eventually hit level 10, netting me a host of augments. It was fun to see what the system decided to give me — Dry, for instance, gained a boost when used on wet socks — but in large part, they were all things I could recreate through Spell Insight and Spell Adjustment.

In fact, I found that grabbing the augments proved incredibly helpful on those fronts. Seeing exactly how my spellforms changed after getting augmented only furthered my understanding, and after playing around with all of my spells, I’d earned a handful of levels in both of the two skills. As an added bonus, I’d even figured out how to modify and chain casts of Dry and Invigorate to decently approximate a blow dryer. Sometimes, it was the little things.

As it turned out, however, my various spells and spell schools weren’t my next group of skills to hit a milestone. That honor went to my resistance skills, and the credit for their rapid growth went to my best and most favorite pal.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“GOD-I-HATE-YOU-I-WANT-TO-KILL-YOU-SO-BADLY-FUCK-YOU!” I screamed the words at the top of my lungs, following them up with every single swear word I knew and several that I made up on the spot. For good measure, I tried to make my voice as screechy and unpleasant as possible. As was to be expected from a class that basically encouraged torture, every pair of students trained within a sound-suppressing shield, which meant the only person could hear me was my current torturer.

“I feel compelled to inform you that expressing the desire to kill a law-enforcement officer is generally legally frowned upon, Miss Astorius. Additionally, as I lack an ‘Annoying Sound Resistance’ skill, I would appreciate it if you at least attempted to restrain yourself.” Warram droned on in his usual monotone, though it felt to me like he was taking a particular joy in today’s session. After all, today’s training was pretty brutal, even for him.

Instructor Lenda — or I supposed if I listened to her, it was “just” Lenda — had gotten her hands on a number of more advanced training aids recently, and they sucked. The temperature-based ones in particular were a new type of nasty, taking the form of small needles that froze or heated up whatever they were stabbed into.

Warram had ever-so-helpfully chosen to attach one to each of my hands. While my right hand’s fingers were close to freezing solid, my left’s were practically being used as kindling right now.

On top of that, Warram was unpleasantly good at modulating their input levels so that my nerves never got too numb from frostbite or burns, meaning that the pain was constant and horrific.

Heat Resistance has reached level 7!

Cold Resistance has reached level 5!

Were it not for both Pain Resistance and Trauma Suppression, I was more than certain that I wouldn’t have lasted even a second of all this.

Even with them, it was kind of not fun.

Speaking of Pain Resistance, it was getting an even greater workout due to a collar that I was wearing. It was reminiscent of a shock collar, but turned up to 100. It didn’t actually do any physical damage or send shocks into me, but instead was enchanted to do nothing but cause pain. If nothing else, on one of the few occasions I’d had the misfortune of conversing with Warram, he’d assured me that they were highly illegal outside controlled uses like this class.

Combined with the poison running through my veins and Warram’s standard horribly shaky dagger-work, my body hurt, it hurt, it HURT, IT-

Pain Resistance has reached level 10!

Oh. Wow. It didn’t hurt.

Or that wasn’t fair. It still hurt pretty horribly, but relative to what I’d been feeling only moments ago, it was a walk in the park. More surprised than anything else, I stopped screaming, feeling my body relax even as it was sent through the ringer by all the various status effects I was suffering from.

Not as consumed by the pain, I noticed two things of note. The first was a dramatically dense cloud of purple fog which had formed in my Stygian Citadel. The moment I focused on it, it surged forth towards the door to the Dungeon of Tragedies. The door opened, admitting the accumulated trauma from the session, before locking itself tightly once more. The cracks in the door pulsed ominously.

Trauma Suppression has reached level 16!

Is that… should I be worried about that? Was getting regularly tortured somehow not healthy for me?

Maybe I’ll chill out with the resistance training after this semester and get that checked out. Somehow. Actually, I wasn’t really sure who I’d go to for something like this, but maybe Suds would know.

Putting my shaky suppression skill out of my mind, I focused on the second thing I’d noticed: Warram’s reaction. As I stopped screaming and relaxed a bit, it was fairly plain to see that he looked rather… disappointed.

“Could you at least try to look a little less sad that I’m not in as much pain anymore?” As the words came out, another more horrible thought popped into my head, one that was possibly even worse than all of the torture instruments attached to me.

“Wait. This isn’t like… your thing, is it? Because I can take being stabbed and poisoned and tortured, but I draw the line on this being some weird S&M-type deal for you.” I did, after all, have standards.

Man. And I’m even wearing a collar, aren’t I? Euch.

He jerked back, his face filling with the most emotion I’d ever seen from him. Thankfully, his expression was one of disgust instead of guilt.

“Miss Astorius, I’d ask you to please keep such thoughts to yourself. I assure you that this is not, as you put it, my thing. And even past that, you would be the last person I would ever have those types of thoughts about. In truth, despite whatever points you may have spent on Charisma, I find your Yekkish characteristics quite unflattering.”

Nice. Nothing dirty then. It’s just good, clean torture. I was probably supposed to be angry about the comment about being “unflattering,” but frankly, if there was one person I was fine with thinking I was ugly, it was Warram.

I shot him my most winning smile, coupling it with a thumbs up. “Glad we’re on the same page, War Man! Nice to know we find each other equally unpleasant. Now as long as you’re not secretly a sex pervert, turn up the collar, please. If you didn’t notice, I hit the next rank.”

With a scoff, he reached over to adjust the settings, only to stop midway. The shadow of a frown fell across his face, and he pulled his hand away with a sigh. He tilted his head to stare at me directly, his brows furrowed into what I thought was genuine concern (though only for himself) mixed with a fair share of exasperation.

“Dammit. Miss Astorius, this was a part of my day I looked forward to. As much as it pains me to say this…” He crossed his arms, the closest thing to pouting that I imagined he was capable of. “Now you’ve just made it weird.”

~~~~~~~~

My training session with the apparently not-a-sex-pest Warram proved to be my most fruitful yet. In addition to my rank up in Pain Resistance, I also hit the Initiate stage for Bleed Resistance too. Ultimately, it wasn’t too surprising with how high the two skills had been pushed from the whole illusion counterspell debacle with the archmage.

Both augments were well-appreciated. Pain Resistance came with an augment that greatly reduced the pain I experienced whenever it was caused by magic. It was an understandable evolution seeing as most of its levels had come from getting stabbed with blades of light in a blood ritual, having my nerves fried by an archmage’s counterspell, and then suffering through the enchanted pain collar.

Blood Resistance came with a blood production buff. As long as I was reasonably well-fed and well-hydrated, my body would produce blood much faster, making it harder to bleed me to truly dangerous levels and allowing me to recover from lack of blood all the faster.

And as a pleasant surprise, it wasn’t just those two resistances that hit the next rank either.

Mental Resistance had been sitting at level nine for a good while now, and had I been normal, it would have hit ten much earlier. Unfortunately, when Lenda had given me the basic mental resistance training aid, it had failed completely — whatever enchantment had been baked into it wasn’t smart enough to get past the shrouding effect of my Stygian Citadel.

Even if it made training a pain, it was nice to know that my Legendary skill was actually doing something.

With the new wave of training devices that Lenda had managed to get a hold of, however, there was a much more sophisticated mental compulsion device in the form of a ring. With that one, however, I trained alone — it was set up to give me a number of fairly ridiculous and embarrassing impulses, and I had no desire to use it in front of Warram.

With the occasionally sensitive nature of the class, Lenda had prepared one-way visual occlusion barriers in addition to the standard sound suppressors, and currently I was in such an area doing my best to resist the pull of the ring.

<<HOWL! HOWL NOW! HOWL LIKE A WOLF! HOWL!>>

I felt my neck jerk forward and my head tilted up in preparation, only to barely stop myself. Why do they program these with such idiotic compulsions? Seriously-

<<Lick your foot! Big lick! Lickity split! Do it now!>>

With how strong the enchantment was, I found myself with my foot in hand, the only thing breaking me out of the compulsion being an errant thought.

Damn. I know I haven’t hit the threshold yet, but I am soooo much more flexible than I used to be, aren’t I? This would not have worked at baseline stats.

Not the point! No thank you to anything foot-related!

The system seemed to approve of my very reasonable aversion to feet, at last rewarding me for the indignities I’d been enduring.

Mental Resistance has reached level 10!

Congratulations! You have reached the Initiate rank in Mental Resistance!

Based on your usage, you have been granted an augment for your skill.

God-Trodden’s Augment

Your mind has been assaulted by the sheer mental force of gods, and yet you’ve come out on the other side, stronger for it. Gain significantly heightened Mental Resistance against all gods and those touched by them. Additionally, gain heightened Mental Resistance against anyone over twenty levels above you.

It was a reminder that most of the skill’s levels had been from Ephesis’s tinkering or from Aarris’s poor restraint.

Guess I should actually thank her for that. Assuming that other Protagonists would count as “touched by the gods,” the augment looked exactly like something I’d want. Maybe if I encountered another Ephesis now, things wouldn’t end up the same way.

Having reached the next rank in Mental Resistance, I scanned the rest of my resistance skills to see if I could eke out another rank up, but none were close enough. Poison Resistance was creeping upwards, and I’d gotten significantly closer to finishing up my old Mithridatism I quest, but I still had a while to go on those fronts.

And so it was that when class ended at last, I turned my attention back to my spells.

~~~~~~~

While I used my free time to throw myself into spell training, three weeks passed largely uneventfully. Of minor note, I managed to finish the chair I’d been working on in my wood class, and while it wasn’t honestly that comfortable, it did look kind of nice. I hit some rocks. Bled with Warram a bit more. Worked out and ran around and applied makeup and half a dozen other things with Flithus. And dungeon-delving-wise, our party even managed two more successful clears, each one easier than the last.

While not exactly what I was after, one more spell did hit the next rank during all of my training: Darken Small Object. Despite the fact that I’d had a number of my skills for much longer, it was no real shock that it managed to reach level 20 before anything else: My hair clip ensured that the spell was constantly in use.

The augment was, as to be expected, hair-related.

Augment of Moonlit Shimmer

When you use Darken Small Object on your own hair, the affected strands will gently sparkle in the moonlight.

Combined with the mysterious luster that the spell’s first augment granted me, my hair now looked… Well, kind of ridiculous, actually. I figured I’d leave it be for now and see what my friends thought, but just in case, I spent some time focusing on the spellweave and figuring out how to disable the augment if I wanted to. In the process, I also figured out how to keep the effect, but tone it down, which managed to make me look significantly less cringe-worthy.

Spell Insight has reached level 7!

Spell Adjustment has reached level 6!

And then, at last, it happened. I’d like to say it was through some suitably momentous occasion, creeping stealthily through the dungeon or protecting my eyes from some rampaging light elemental, but the truth was much simpler.

I woke up one morning.

My window was open.

It was too bright.

One indignant groan and a cast of Shade later, and it was finally done.

Dark Magic has reached level 20!

Congratulations! You have reached the Apprentice rank in Dark Magic!

Based on your skill usage, you have been granted an augment.

Augment of the Unseen

Enhances the effects of any dark magic which conceals you or improves your stealth.

I couldn’t say the augment was a surprise, exactly, as I’d eventually gotten around to looking up all of my skills in the library, so I had a good idea of how they’d all evolve. Still, I’d been glad to discover that the system took my stealth skills — my dark Mana Feet and Arcane Armory variants — more seriously than all the time I’d spent casting spells on my hair and contacts. I’d have been somewhat peeved if I’d ended up with another augment that did something to my hair.

The augment, however, was the least exciting part of hitting 20 in a spell class. The fact that I could now start getting some more serious lessons from the archmage was one thing, but even on top of that…

You have completed a class quest: Raise a basic spell school to the Apprentice Rank (Repeatable)

+5000xp

+2 class points

And then, with those 5000 experience points finally pushing me over the edge…

Congratulations! You have reached level 13!

“Yes!” Honestly, not what I’d been expecting while lying in bed fist thing in the morning, but I’d take it! Suddenly filled with much more energy than kash or coffee could ever provide, I practically catapulted myself out of bed. “All right random allocation! Give me something good!”

+1 Constitution

+2 Strength

+1 Intelligence

+1 Wisdom

+1 Endurance

+2 Charisma

+2 Dexterity

+1 Perception

Damn. I was well aware that if anyone else could see how many stats I was getting per level, they’d go green with envy, and maybe I was being a tad obnoxious, but I found myself disappointed nonetheless.

Really wanted that Dexterity threshold. A single point of Dexterity was all that was keeping me from grabbing a few more Dexterity skills like a movement-impairment resistance, and I wanted them.

And then, after giving myself a moment to let it pass through me, I got over it. Next level! Besides, just because I hadn’t hit the Dexterity threshold didn’t mean I hadn’t reached any thresholds.

Congratulations! You have hit 25 Charisma and reached the first Charisma threshold.

The speed at which you learn Social skills now scales with your Charisma.

Your Social skills are strengthened, and negative Social skills used against you are weakened. These effects are heightened when dealing with those who have under 25 Charisma.

Unlike had been true for most of my other stat thresholds, there was nothing unexpected here — the same library books that detailed possible skill evolutions also went into great detail concerning stat thresholds, and I’d finally taken the liberty of reading up on them. On top of what was written, future points in Charisma would apparently have less of an effect on me physically, instead granting me more of a “magnetic aura” in a social sense. It wasn’t mind control or anything, but I would admit it was still a bit freaky.

Given that I didn’t have that many skills in the Social category, the threshold wouldn’t have been too exciting for me, save for the fact that it granted one additional feature.

Gain ability: Bodily Mastery

Bodily Mastery

You now have control over a large host of hygienic and cosmetic bodily functions.

The ability description wasn’t much to go off of, but even had I not researched it in the library, I instinctively knew exactly what it was good for. And it was good for a lot.

Didn’t want to smell sweaty after an intense workout? No problem. My sweat no longer smelled unless I wanted it to. In fact, I didn’t even have to sweat if I didn’t want to — my skills and stats did a much better job of regulating my temperature than sweat could anyway.

Shaving? No longer a thing. Any part of my body that I wanted to be hairless just would be. For those who grew facial hair, the ability could be used to freeze a beard or mustache at just the right length, too.

No longer would I shed hair if I didn’t want to, putting an end to my days of finding strands of it on my pillows and in the shower. No more need to cut fingernails or toenails. My breath would remain pleasant and my mouth hygienic even if I didn’t brush my teeth. Even when it came to smaller things like not waking up with crusty eyes, I was now good to go.

Of particular note, the ability also apparently encompassed periods. While it didn’t fully deal with some of the side effects like the cramping, as of today, I was officially done bleeding once a month unless I wanted to.

That alone probably made it my best ability yet.

I would have killed for even half of these effects back on Earth. Somehow, the ability drove it home that I was superhuman even more so than my magically enhanced Strength or my boundless stamina.

As for the class points, I’d wait to chat with Advisor Flithus before I locked anything in. As much as I was looking forward to doing just that, though, there was something more immediately pressing on my mind. Done looking through my notifications, I hastily rushed out of my room and left the house.

One quick trip through the city later, I found myself at the foot of a colossal rainbow tower.

Before I could even attempt to open its massive wooden doors, I was teleported to a familiar study with a skeletal figure perched in his ornate, crystalline chair.

“I reached the Apprentice rank in dark magic!” I supplied before he could question the cause for my presence.

He glanced down at some papers he’d likely been reading over prior to my arrival before shrugging his bony shoulders.

“It occurs to me that we should perhaps schedule these lessons of ours in advance, but I do suppose I can take a break. It’s hardly like I sleep or get tired, after all.” He waved a hand, and the various clutter on his desk started to pack itself away into a host of drawers. Apparently he was minimally more concerned with the study’s appearance now that he knew I could actually see all of the messiness. Once he was satisfied, he idly tapped his phalanges against his chair.

“Very well then. Let us move onto something a bit more advanced then, shall we?”