Chapter 63
Added 2024-05-10 09:33:08 +0000 UTCMy outfit for the day wasn't super-festive, I wasn't a Christian to actually celebrate Christmas, but it was nice. After all, when you had tangible proof that Pagan Gods existed and not tangible proof that Jesus existed, it was hard to take Christianity on faith like that. No, instead of wearing anything red or green, I opted for a three-piece suit, tie, and dress shirt, along with a hat that I felt looked pretty stylish. A gold Rolex watch and gold tie clip completed the outfit. True, it was a pretty old-school way to dress, but I figured old-school might be the way to go to make a good impression on Buffy's Mom. This would be my first significant meeting with her, after all, and I wanted to make a good impression. If Buffy was willing to be civil, then I was willing to put the effort in too.
To that end, we were dressing up a bit. It'd actually been Amy's suggestion, though she'd also suggested I get a haircut and shave. I'd actually grown a bit of a beard in the last month or so and my hair had gotten longer and shaggier. The unique combination of genetics that made me who I was also accelerated my hair growth somewhat, I'd normally kept up with barbers appointments and shaving, but I'd practically sequestered myself in my converted warehouse to train for most of December and it showed. I didn't take Amy's suggestion because Cordy had told me she liked the beard on our last date night before she'd jetted off on her European Holiday.
"I still say you should have gone to the barber." Frowned Amy as she came down in a shimmery blue dress. She usually didn't dress up like this, but she was making the effort and that was good.
"You look great, Ames." I grinned.
"So do you, in an old school, scruffy, mobster kinda way." Smirked Amy.
"And since Xander lives one street over from Buffy's, that just leaves Sheila. Where is she?" I questioned.
"Here. Keep your pants on, Uly." Chuckled Sheila as she came downstairs dressed in black slacks, a black blouse, and a small, black, jacket. Amy sighed as she came downstairs.
"That's the one you went with?" Sighed Amy.
"Hey, you've got your dressy and I've got mine." Shrugged Sheila.
"Great, you two look like you could be going to a funeral and I'm in this. We so don't match." Grumbled Amy.
"I'm sure it'll be fine." I offered.
"Yeah, Ames. You're thinking too hard about this." Agreed Sheila.
"Maybe. I'd still like to change. I've got the black slip and that striped undershirt that should match you guys." Tried Amy.
"No time, we need to leave now if we're going to get there on time. You're good to go. Everybody in the Camaro. " I responded, grabbing my keys from the bowl and the food I'd prepared. It wasn't anything super fancy, just a few baskets of Shumai, Xiaolongbao, and Haam Seui Gok. As dim sum spreads went, it was pretty shitty, but still, I figured it was good enough. Then I headed out the door, Sheila and Amy in tow. Thankfully, I'd already loaded the presents last night. I'd had no clue Amy and Sheila would take so long to get ready and we wouldn't have had time for that now.
Amy grumbled under her breath about her non-matching clothes as we piled into the Camaro and headed to the Summers' house for the party. Fortunately, there wasn't a whole bunch of traffic and we made pretty good time. We pulled up to the driveway of sixteen-thirty Revello Drive exactly on time. As I manhandled the tower of bamboo steaming containers up to the door with one hand, I knocked twice with the other. Moments later, Buffy greeted me with an unamused look.
"You're late!" She accused.
"I'm a sorcerer. I'm never late or early. I arrive precisely when I mean to." I shot back. That drew a stifled snort from Xander who'd made his way over along with Giles.
"Did you just paraphrase Lord of the Rings to cover for your tardiness?" Queried Giles.
"Xander made me read it. I have opinions on its portrayal of Dwarves and Elves, but that can wait a bit. Can someone show me where the food is? I'd like to put my not-really-dim-sum down so I can go get the presents out of the car." I answered.
"Presents?" Asked Buffy.
"Dwarves and Elves are real?" Questioned Xander.
"This way." Sighed Giles, as he led me to the dining room. I could tell he was annoyed that he was probably going to be fielding questions from Xander about that. While Dwarves and Elves in the Tolkien sense did exist, somewhat, they mostly existed in various other realms with a few on some of the Elemental and Outer Planes. What you were more likely to run into here on Earth, though, were various Fae versions of them, some of which could be just as cruel and capricious as any Demon. There had been an incident with a Leprechaun in North Dakota just a few years back, for instance, and those were the most common Dwarf-like fae on Earth.
As we entered the dining room from the front hall, Mrs Summers entered from the kitchen carrying a basket of rolls, she put the basket down on a side table and turned to head back into the kitchen when she spotted Giles and I, and her face broke out into a grin.
"Ulysses! Merry Christmas! Buffy told me you'd grown a beard, but I hadn't believed her when she'd said it hadn't come in patchy. A young man's first beard usually does." She greeted.
"I've got a few advantages on that front most don't. I brought a bit of dim sum, should I put it on that table?" I queried.
"You shouldn't have gone through the trouble." Demurred Mrs Summers.
"It was no trouble. Believe it or not, cooking relaxes me. It's practically Zen compared to the stuff I normally do. Besides, it's not really much of a dim sum, I only cooked three types of dishes. A proper dim sum would have a whole spread." I retorted.
"My, cooking and guitar? Should I be giving you the concerned parent talk about my daughter?" Teased Mrs Summers.
"I'm not on the market. Besides, I'm pretty sure Buffy is more likely to kill me than kiss me if that subject ever got broached." I chuckled, putting the dim sum down on the table near the bread.
Mrs Summers laughed at that before something dinged in the kitchen and she excused herself. I headed back out to the car to grab the presents. The next few minutes were spent bringing presents inside and placing them under the tree. As I did that, Xander and Oz both came over to talk. Xander wanted to ask a question about Tournaments for Chi Adepts. Apparently, he's heard of two of the various tournaments that were around. The King of Iron Fist and King of Fighters Tournaments and wanted to ask about them. Oz just wanted to say hi before heading back into the family room to sit next to Willow on the couch.
"All right, first off, the Tournaments you do know. The King of Fighters is the championship tournament of its circuit. You need to fight in lower-ranked tournaments and win them just to qualify. The King of Iron Fist Tournament is an invite-only, independent, non-circuit, tournament. They've only held the one so far, and if they ever hold another one, it'll be because the Mishima Zaibatsu felt like spending the money for it rather than for any other reason. Those types of Tournaments either get held by tradition or because it makes financial sense to the folks picking up the check. They don't have circuits, so there's no real opportunities for sponsorships or television deals." I sighed, squashing his hopes.
"Oh. There's gotta be others though, right?" Pressed Xander.
"Yeah, but they're not open-invite. The Dead or Alive and World Warrior Tournaments are both like the King of Iron Fist Tournament, invite-only tournaments held by the DOATEC Corporation and the Shadaloo Government of Indochina respectively. The Ultimate World Fighting Tournament is another one you have to qualify for by winning a lower-ranked qualifier tournament, the Killer Instinct Tournament happened approximately once and Ultratech is still feeling the backlash from that blowing up on them and isn't likely to hold another. Then there's Tournaments like the one on Hanging Neck Island in the South Pacific or the Battle Arena Toshinden Tournament. Those are held by the Criminal Underworld and regularly feature demonic competitors in fights to the death." I informed.
"Well, what about the one I heard you talking about? Mortal Kombat, I think? Why's it spelled with a K?" Asked Xander.
"It's tradition. Anyway, that's not something just anyone can enter. You need an invite if you want to compete, and you really shouldn't try to sneak your way there. The Grandmaster of the Tournaments isn't someone you want to tangle with if you don't have to." I refuted.
"Shoot. Any ideas about when the next qualifier for the King of Fighters Tournament is gonna be?" Questioned Xander.
"Actually, there should be one in late May. They're held two months in advance of the actual Tournament." I responded.
"Can we go?" Queried Xander.
"We'll need a third. They're team battles, after all." I pointed out.
"Huh, what about Buffy?" Asked Xander.
"No. Besides, could you see Buffy agreeing to give up her Summer to fight in a tournament? What about if we win and she has to fight in a second tournament? No, I'm pretty sure Buffy isn't our third. Maybe Sheila. We'll have to ask." I answered.
"Got me there." Grumbled Xander.
Soon enough, however, we got all the presents in and had to rejoin the group. Oz and Willow were sat on the couch while Buffy was in a chair, Amy was on an Ottoman, and Sheila was on the floor. Xander moved to join them in watching TV. They were watching some sort of Christmas Cartoon about a Green. . .thing that hated Christmas and was trying to steal it. The thing, apparently called a Grinch, was horrifyingly animated, yet his malice seemed to be limited to petty thievery. It was uncomfortable to watch and kind of silly when you actually thought about it for a moment, but then, it was apparently for kids.
"Droll isn't it?" Asked an English voice to my right. I turned to see a bookish-looking man in his twenties, like a younger version of Giles but with the stick still lodged far enough up his ass that it was even affecting his posture.
"I think if I told them about Krampus it'd blow their minds. You must be Wesley." I remarked holding out my hand.
"Indeed, Wesley Wyndam-Pryce. You would be Ulysses, yes? You look older than I expected. It must be the beard." Nodded Wesley shaking my hand.
"Yeah, you're not the first to say that. I've got a bit of an edge in the hair growth department over most guys my age." I grinned.
"Oh? Is there a Chi Adept technique for hair growth? I must say, that seems a bit of a waste of what I'm given to understand are vital energies." Frowned Wesley.
"I'm sure there is, but it's not that." I shrugged.
"Sorcery then? Some sort of alchemical shampoo, perhaps?" Pressed Wesley.
"Why so interested? Don't tell me male pattern baldness runs in your family?" I shot back.
"Now see here, I'll have you know that the Wyndam-Pryce family line is quite dignified in that regard! I won't have that sort of talk!" Intoned Wesley.
"Huh. Giles was right, you are an utter pillock. Calm down, Wesley, it's just a joke." I sighed.
That left Wesley sputtering in indignation and moved to join Sheila and Xander on the floor. Wesley stormed off, likely to complain to Giles about my treatment of him. I found I didn't much care, though the headache he was probably giving Giles right now was no doubt legendary. I'd make it up to the man with his present. McCleary Forty Year Reserve was the most expensive scotch on the market that I could find. It was the last batch before the twenty-year decline of the McCleary Distillery had started. The distillery had been sold off in seventy-seven to a German Company from Hesse that owned Schnapps, Akavit, Cognac, and Irish Whiskey distilleries and was looking to get into the Scotch Market. They'd managed to get the quality back to where it had been a few years ago, but by then those pre-decline batches had aged, making them even more valuable.
Satisfied that Giles would like his present, I turned back to the TV. I watched as the Grinch's heart grew three sizes and he returned all the stolen stuff. Apparently, that meant no harm no foul and he got to join in the festivities. It was ridiculous. I enjoyed the next few specials a lot more. The stop-motion one with the singing Ice and Fire Elementals was pretty fun, actually. After a rocky start, I think I might actually be starting to enjoy myself a bit. It was just a shame the Snow Miser song was so catchy. I could just tell that would become an earworm that would drive me insane if I let it.
Anyway, we spent a few hours around the TV, but Mrs Summers came in to gather us up for presents while the Turkey was in the oven. Presumably, we'd eat afterward. I wasn't expecting much, mind you. None of the others had my resources, but Xander and Sheila still found ways to surprise me. Xander got me a stack of music books I didn't already have, and not just one style either. There was stuff from the Blues Brothers, stuff from Roy Clark, and a bunch of stuff from Clapton, The Police, and others. It was a good gift and I told him so.
Meanwhile, Sheila went and somehow managed to find a copy of the Testament of Master Gotetsu. It was a manual of instruction for the Japanese School of Ansatsuken circa nineteen-nineteen. The thing was, most of these manuals were supposed to have been destroyed or otherwise have vanished. Very few survived World War Two, and of those which were known to have survived, most were in the hands of foreign practitioners. Said practitioners had a nasty habit of disappearing or winding up dead. Over the decades every single one was supposed to have been killed or had disappeared.
"Where did you find this?" I questioned.
"I might have done a bit of hunting of my own on the fourteenth. I wound up dusting a group of vamps hassling the guy who runs that Diner on Stone Avenue, you know, the one with the weird-looking, stained glass windows? Turns out the guy was some kind of demon in disguise. I was all ready to fight, but get this, the Guy's a pacifist. Apparently, his whole species gave up doing a buncha demon stuff around the turn of the century so they could blend in with normal folks. Anyway, he asked me what I wanted for helping him out and I told him I needed something to get you for a present. A few questions later, he pulled that out of his desk drawer!" Grinned Sheila.
"Demon pacifist? Yeah right, like that's real." Scoffed Buffy.
"Actually, there are a few demonic species that fit the bill. Was his true form red and scaly? Did he perhaps have small horns for eyebrows?" Queried Wesley.
"Yeah, how'd you guess?" Asked Sheila.
"As I suspected. That was an Ano-Movic Demon. They used to be quite terrifying combatants a hundred-odd years ago. These days, they've put that chapter behind them. Most own restaurants. There was one in Gloucester we used to go to on Weekends when the Academy let classes out. The Cauldron was a cafe inside an old Tudor townhouse." Mused Wesley.
"Pacifist demons, what next? Vegetarian vampires?" Quipped Xander.
"Well, I think the book is amazing. Thank you." I grinned.
If Sheila's present was good, Amy's present was better. Granted it took a bit of explaining on her part to tell me what the little brass circlet was supposed to be. I certainly wasn't about to scan it with my third eye in front of everyone. It turned out, it was a magic item that helped assimilate experiences faster and more easily. She'd got the idea from reading about neuroplasticity and how younger people picked up new information easier because their brains had more neuroplasticity. What that effectively meant was that this was yet another training enhancer. Apparently, Xander, Sheila, and I were all getting one. Amy already had hers.
"You realize this means I'm only going to push harder for training, right?" I questioned.
"I know." Grinned Amy.
That was the extent of my own gifts, but I'd gotten everyone gifts even if they hadn't gotten me one. Amy received a silver bracelet that was not only stylish but would make her immune to all poisons, drugs, diseases, infestations, and toxins. Sheila received a pair of mystically enhanced motorcycle boots that would enhance her strength, speed, and durability mystically. Xander received a magic bracer that when activated would spawn a telekinetic shield. Oz received an enchanted belt buckle that would make him faster. Buffy received a suite of various potions, a basket of healing potions, antitoxins, mystical physical enhancing potions, and fatigue cures. Willow received a leather trenchcoat enhanced with protective magic that made it as good as armor and a glamour that would allow her to alter its appearance to suit her. Giles received the aforementioned scotch, while Wesley received a rare Thirties Edition of Tobin's Spirit Guide. Finally, Mrs Summers received a rare bottle of nineteen-sixty-one Dom Perignon Champagne.
"This bottle is worth twenty-five-thousand dollars! I can't accept this!" Exclaimed Mrs Summers.
"Trust me, that's not even the most expensive gift I've given this year. It's fine." I chuckled.
"But you're just a teenager, how could you afford this?" Queried Mrs Summers.
"Forget it, Mrs S. Ulysses is loaded. That won't even put a dent in his wallet." Mused Xander.
"How rich exactly are we talking?" Piped up Oz.
"I'm quite curious as well." Frowned Wesley.
"Disgustingly rich." Snorted Willow.
"No. John Hammond is disgustingly rich. He's worth a bit over a billion dollars. It let him try to clone dinosaurs for a theme park in Costa Rica and wound up getting people killed. I've only got shade under three-hundred-million." I shot back.
"Huh. You don't act like a rich guy." Shrugged Oz.
"You're worth more than my father is. He's an Earl, and you're worth more than him. By about fifty million quid." Blinked Wesley.
"Come off it Wesley. Everyone knows that Earldom is an Irish Title that's in name only." Scoffed Giles.
"Still." Frowned Willow.
"And you got me potions? You know there's some designer shoes I've had my eye on. . ." Tried Buffy.
Whatever I was going to retort with was cut off by the oven dinging, signaling that the Turkey was done. As we all moved into the dining room around the table as Mrs Summers headed to the kitchen to bring out the food, Buffy couldn't help but get one last dig in at me. We'd just about sat down, when she looked at Amy's bracelet, then back at me.
"You know, buying jewelry for someone not your girlfriend could be seen as kinda hinky, you know?" Pointed out Buffy.
"That's practical. She can wear it with armor or other gear. Besides, I got Cordy something more expensive." I responded.
"Still. It's kinda sketchy, I mean you and Amy living together and all." Pressed Buffy.
"They're living together? You're two-timing Cordelia Chase?" Blurted out Willow.
"We are living together as roommates. Nothing is going on between us. I am not two-timing anyone." I insisted.
That accusation sort of put a damper on my mood for the rest of the evening. I guess Buffy couldn't go a whole day without trying to antagonize me. It had apparently been too big an ask. I grumbled through the last bit of the party. The last thing I needed was for Cordy to hear rumors about me cheating on her. Especially since they weren't true. Somehow, I got the feeling that she'd wind up hearing it from Willow. Buffy had at least been trying to get along before now. Willow had been antagonistic or had ignored me the whole night. I decided we'd leave after dinner.
Oh well, at least the food was good. . .
XXXX
AN: So yeah. Fairly standard social chapter that sets up a few things. First, the Arc that'll be going on over the Summer as Xander, Ulysses, and Sheila enter the Qualifier for the King of Fighters Tournament. Next, the Training Circlets are going to feature pretty prominently in training stuff going forward. Finally, we introduce Wesley and get a sense that although Buffy may be willing to play nice up to a point, Willow still doesn't like Ulysses and very much is not.
Other nineties stuff this chapter includes mentions of Tournaments from Street Fighter, King of Fighters, Tekken, Battle Arena Toshinden, Dead or Alive, Yu Yu Hakusho, and Killer Instinct. Gotetsu, the Master whose Book Sheila gave Ulysses, was the Master of Gouken and Akuma from Street Fighter, McCleary Scotch is from Pulp Fiction, John Hammond and his cloned dinosaur theme park are from Jurrasic Park, finally the Leprechaun in North Dakota is a reference to the First Leprechaun Movie. I am as yet undecided on whether or not I will put the sequels in. They do tend to get wacky, after all.
At any rate, the next chapter will be another small time skip, then we'll slow things down when Buffy's Birthday in January comes around.
Stay tuned. . .