Naruto: Freeloading is Great! 2 [40]

“Ladies and gentlemen, each person here surely has a very, very important question they wish to ask one of us. Therefore, to avoid the tragedy we just experienced, and also to prevent our minds from spiraling into chaos once again… I hereby announce: The Hoshino Residence Roundtable Conference is now—”

Hoshino, sitting at the head of the dining table, spoke solemnly. But before he could finish, Naruto raised a hand and interrupted.

“Wait! I still don’t fully understand the current situation!”

“Sigh... How many times must I explain it for you to understand? Listen carefully—I’ll repeat the conference rules and guidelines one last time. Remember, this is the final time. If you still fail to comprehend them, you’ll lose your right to participate. Everyone, do you agree?”

“Agreed.” ×4

Hoshino sternly warned Naruto and looked at the other participants seated around the table, receiving unanimous approval.

As for how things had suddenly turned out this way, the reason and process were actually quite simple.

Earlier, when Sakura-bro and Hoshino had faced off against Sasuke and Naruto, the situation had already become extremely complicated.

Then Hinata jumped in, making things even messier, and finally Ino joined the fray.

Thus, the six truants, all screaming and shouting, each desperately wanting to clarify their own burning questions, descended into chaos. None of the six, confused and arguing without logic or reason, got any answers. Ultimately, they ended up in a chaotic, six-way brawl.

And so, with bruised faces and torn clothes, the six fighters finally stopped their battle at Hoshino’s suggestion, sat down around the dining table, and prepared to start their “Roundtable Conference.”

Even though the dining table was rectangular, Hoshino stubbornly insisted on calling it a roundtable anyway.

“Rule One: Questions will be asked in order according to when each person entered the apartment.

Rule Two: Each person may ask only one question per round. Questions must be concise and clear.

Rule Three: No rambling or hesitation during the conference.

Rule Four: Any violations will immediately enter a voting phase.”

Hoshino deliberately kept the rules brief—after all, Naruto was far too stupid to comprehend anything complicated.

“That concludes the rules. Naruto, did you understand them this time?”

“…I think so…but…”

“But what? Speak.”

“Why does our new home have to be named ‘Hoshino Residence’? Hey, I’m a tenant too—I protest!”

“Protest deni—”

Before Hoshino could finish the word “denied,” Sasuke slammed her hand down on the table.

“Protest accepted! Hoshino, you’re being too arbitrary. I propose we immediately enter a voting round!”

Having said that, Sasuke glanced around at everyone.

“Raise your hand if you agree Naruto has the right to rename the apartment!”

Swish-swish-swish-swish!

Except for Hoshino and Sakura-bro, everyone raised their hands.

“Four against two—Naruto wins. However, since Naruto’s intelligence is too low, I'll take charge of naming the apartment in her place. It will be… [Tsuki-Hi Love Nest]! There! Perfect!”

Sasuke’s incomprehensible words plunged everyone except Naruto into confusion.

They understood “Love Nest” easily enough. “Hi” clearly came from the last character of Hoshino’s name—but where did the “Tsuki” come from?

“Ah—! Sasuke, isn’t ‘Tsuki’ your own nickname? Why should the name of my and Hoshino’s home include your name? I refuse! I've already thought of a name for this place: [Naruto-Hoshino Broadcast Studio]! ‘NaruHoshi Studio’ for short!”

“…Naruto!!”

Naruto’s suggestion made Sasuke furious again.

Sasuke was now certain Naruto truly intended to steal Hoshino from her—fake best friend!

Aside from the arguing Sasuke and Naruto, Hoshino exchanged contemptuous glances with the other three people. So, you scheming little Wallet, you helped Naruto get naming rights just to benefit yourself, huh?

Wait, Sasuke even has a nickname?

Tsuki… Tsuki… Sa-Tsuki? Uchiha Satsuki?

Wow, that sounds really girly.

In the end, because Sasuke was obviously being unreasonable, everyone voted again, officially renaming Hoshino and Naruto’s new shared apartment to “[Naruto-Hoshino Broadcast Studio].”

“Since that issue has been resolved, I’ll now officially announce again: The [NaruHoshi Studio] Roundtable Conference begins!”

“Alright!” ×5

“Now, according to order of arrival, I’ve always been inside the apartment, so I undoubtedly have the right to speak first. So, here is my question…”

Hoshino had long decided on the question he most wanted to ask.

He stood up dramatically, pointed directly at someone across the table, and shouted loudly under everyone’s nervous gaze:

“Hyūga Hinata! Are you male or female!?”

“…” ×5

Everyone was struck speechless by Hoshino’s incredibly dumb question.

The first to react was Sasuke, who picked up a glass of water from the table and threw it at Hoshino’s head.

“What kind of idiotic question is that, you moron!”

“Ow! H-how dare you sneak-attack the master of this home, Sasuke, you—”

Before Hoshino could finish, Sasuke ignored him completely and proposed to everyone:

“Since Hoshino’s question is obviously too stupid to merit an answer, I suggest we skip this ridiculous question entirely!”

All five hands except Hoshino’s immediately went up…

Hinata was obviously a girl. Why even ask such a stupid thing? Total lunatic.

“…Dammit.”

At this, Hoshino cursed through gritted teeth.

But rules were rules—voting results were absolute, and resisting would mean losing his right to participate.

After nursing the lump on his head caused by Sasuke’s thrown glass, Hoshino grudgingly sat down again. Sasuke spoke once more:

“I entered the apartment before Naruto, so it’s my turn to ask a question next. Naruto—are you truly trying to steal Hoshino from me!?”

“Yes, absolutely!”

“…You— You damned traitor!! Our friendship is over! I, Uchiha Sasuke, swear right now that our friendship officially ends today, Uzumaki Naruto!! You’re no longer my best—no, you're no longer even my friend!!”

“W-wait, Sasuke! P-please, I have my reasons! I’m doing this for your own good…! D-don’t end our friendship… trust me, Sasuke!”

“What possible reason could you have!? Knowing clearly my relationship with Hoshino, you still shamelessly got involved… You bitch! You’re an even bigger bitch than Ino! Don’t call me Sasuke—we’re not that close anymore! Call me Uchiha-sama!”

Sasuke and Naruto’s fragile plastic-flower friendship completely shattered as their emotions ran wild.

Meanwhile, Hoshino—whose turn to ask a question had just been forcibly skipped—felt deeply complicated inside.

Wh-what should I do? Naruto, this damned gaylord, openly admitted he loves me!

It was already troublesome enough when a Hinata of unclear gender suddenly appeared—and now Naruto too!

Why do these gaylords keep sticking to me one after another, with no end in sight!?

Am I some kind of gaylord magnet!?

Could it be that my passive skill isn’t “Unlucky,” but actually “100% Attraction to Gaylords”!?

Previously, Hoshino had still doubted Hinata’s gender. But now, after understanding exactly how irresistible he was to gaylords, he had already come to a firm conclusion about Hinata’s gender:

Hinata was definitely a man—and definitely gay!

Because no matter how he thought about it, there was no possible way Hinata wasn’t gay.

If Hinata wasn’t gay, why would he suddenly shift his affections from Naruto to himself? The only rational explanation was that Hinata had fallen victim to Hoshino’s passive ability!

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T/N: its so cooked.... this wont end until boruto

This is a fan translation of 火影之软饭真好吃 by 肾亏能力者 All rights to the original work belong to the creator. Please support them by exploring their original work or sharing it with others if you can. Thank you for reading and supporting my efforts to bring this story to a wider audience!