Naruto: Freeloading is Great! 2 [36]

Knocked unconscious by an Uchiha’s glare, knocked out by the Hyūga clan, scared unconscious by the Hokage’s man, knocked out by Kakashi, then electrocuted unconscious by Kakashi again... In half a day's time, Hoshino had fainted a total of five times.

How terribly long... How could so many things happen when even one full day hadn’t passed yet?

Was this the difference between having a busy day and a lazy one?

Already exhausted in both body and spirit, Hoshino stubbornly refused to wake up from his fifth fainting spell, instead sleeping straight through until the next day.

When Hoshino finally woke, he found himself lying on his bed, with no idea how he'd ended up there.

The broken wooden door Kakashi had smashed apart had already been patched up with some wooden planks.

“Although her head’s normally as dumb as a rock, she can actually be pretty reliable when the situation calls for it.”

Hoshino glanced at Naruto, who was curled up tightly under the covers, sleeping soundly.

Only when this kid was asleep did she look anything like a normal human being with an actual brain.

He went to the bathroom intending to wash up, and possibly take a shower.

“...”

No water. Checking carefully, it seemed there wasn’t electricity either. Could it be…?

“Ugh...! Hoshino, why did you have to kick me awake again? Can’t you be even a little gentlemanly—kyaaa! It’s eight o'clock already! We're gonna be late for school! Why didn’t you wake me earlier?!”

Watching Naruto panicking foolishly with the alarm clock in hand, Hoshino slapped her across the head.

“How could we possibly be late?! It’s Sunday, school’s off. Besides, we’re still on leave.”

“If there’s no school, why’d you kick me awake...? Wait… Don’t tell me—m-massage again? Isn’t that something we only do at night...? It’s broad daylight right now…so there’s no need, right...? Or maybe… I'll lend you today’s pantsu... can’t you just spare me this one time?”

Naruto curled herself tightly into the blanket, rolling into the corner like a ball.

“How can you say something so disgusting first thing in the morning?! Look carefully at these two papers!”

Hoshino threw the water and electricity bills he was holding straight at Naruto.

Naruto picked up the papers, glanced at them, and her expression immediately changed.

“...Um... um... I can explain this.”

“Explain what? Didn’t I give you money a few days ago to pay these bills? What excuse do you have this time...? Are you going to tell me ramen waved at you again, or that the dango called you over? Come on, tell me!”

“N-no, neither! This time I went to buy… I went to buy... mph! Mmmph!”

Not waiting for Naruto to finish, certain that the brat had once again secretly spent their shared funds on snacks for herself, Hoshino immediately pressed Naruto’s head down into her own blanket.

Only after Naruto struggled to the brink of suffocation did Hoshino let go, letting a breath of fresh air into the blanket.

After repeating this several times, Naruto, finally unable to bear the torture, screamed out the truth without hesitation:

“It was pantsu! Actually, I went to buy pantsu! This time, last time, the time before that—all of it was pantsu! I never bought any of those super delicious-looking snacks at all! Why—why did you have to force me to say it...? I’m not someone who never feels embarrassed, you know! Besides, the reason I don’t have any pantsu to wear... isn’t it all your fault anyway?!”

Her face flushed completely red—it was unclear whether from nearly suffocating or from shamefully shouting such embarrassing words.

Finally freed from Hoshino’s hold, Naruto was blushing furiously from head to toe.

Hearing Naruto’s words, realization dawned on Hoshino instantly.

No wonder the brat always had pantsu to wear after such a long time—despite the fact that he’d always secretly thrown them out downstairs.

He’d always known that tossing Naruto’s pantsu out was wasting money.

But he had no choice. This cross-dressing pervert's skin was growing thicker every day.

It had been manageable at first, but this brat was becoming increasingly shameless, sometimes intentionally leaving freshly-removed pantsu beside Hoshino’s bed.

What was that supposed to be?

Initially, he suspected Naruto was trying to seduce him. But after seeing no suspicious moves, he discarded that possibility. The only logical conclusion left was… Naruto was trying to turn him gay!

This brainless brat probably thought that as a close friend to her and Sasuke, Hoshino must be a gaylord as well.

Could Hoshino endure Naruto’s immoral behavior? …Absolutely not!

That’s why he’d always thrown away Naruto’s dirty pantsu—to make it absolutely clear through his actions that he would never bend.

But, judging by the result... this brat was incurable, determined to battle him until the very end.

“Sigh... forget it. There’s no need to pay the utility bills anymore anyway—I don’t want to stay here anymore.”

“You don’t want to stay here?!”

For some unknown reason, Naruto’s eyes instantly grew red upon hearing Hoshino’s words.

…Just because she wouldn’t let him touch her chest, he threatened to abandon her?

He’d clearly said he wouldn’t leave her—but once the white sticky fluid rushed to his head, he completely forgot all promises.

This trashy scumbag would really do anything for his dirty H-desires…

Though feeling terribly wronged, Naruto somehow ended up fully surrendering to this treatment. Slowly, her hands reached toward the buttons of her pajamas.

“I-it’s not the first time anyway, although doing this during the day is new... C-come on, then… You can touch me however y-you want… if my chest alone isn’t enough this time… y-you can just take off the pants yourself… If you just want to rub…uwaah!”

Naruto hadn’t even finished speaking, nor had she finished unbuttoning her top, when an unidentified object smacked her directly in the face.

“If I don’t beat you every single day, you’ll climb right up onto my head, won’t you!? One more time, and I’ll directly beat you until you're crippled!! Hurry up, get changed, and come with me to find a new place!”

“…Together? We’re going together to find a new place? Didn’t you just say you were abandoning me to go live alone?”

“Abandoning you...? You're the one who said we should live apart! Ahh, this is fantastic, I can finally get rid of you—hey, hey! Stay away! Your snot’s dripping all over me, it’s disgusting!!”

With her brain clearly malfunctioning again, Naruto lunged forward with half-undone clothing and hugged Hoshino tightly.

Unfortunately for Naruto, a few seconds later, Hoshino angrily tore her away and flung her aside.

Watching Naruto grow increasingly perverted, Hoshino was more thankful than ever he’d decided to move to a new place.

He absolutely had to find somewhere with two separate bedrooms. No way could he keep sharing a room with this irredeemable pervert.

Just as Hoshino was making up his mind, Naruto picked up the object he’d just thrown at her and gave him a strange look.

“As expected of Hoshino—someone who’d do anything for money. Even though I hid that money from the ANBU really well, you still found it right away. Truly, whenever money is involved, your nose becomes sharper than a dog’s—”

“…The one million ryō in your hand was forced onto me by Sasuke’s father...”

“...Eh? You mean this isn’t the one million I hid away?”

Hoshino and Naruto stared at each other in silence for several seconds before Naruto broke into a cold sweat.

“You secretly hid money planning to buy more useless garbage, then pile trouble onto me again… huhhhhhh!?”

“H-Hoshino, your eyes are glowing again... Do you really need to get so mad over such a little thing? The ANBU said the money was mine—I can spend it however I w-w-want! It’s not like he gave it to y—UWAAAH! I OBJECT TO VIOLENCE! WAAHHHHH!”

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This is a fan translation of 火影之软饭真好吃 by 肾亏能力者 All rights to the original work belong to the creator. Please support them by exploring their original work or sharing it with others if you can. Thank you for reading and supporting my efforts to bring this story to a wider audience!