Naruto: Freeloading is Great! 2 [35]

After Naruto’s frantic explanation, the one-eyed ANBU finally put Hoshino down.

It turned out that Naruto's look of suffocation had just been a practiced performance.

These two kids—one wasn’t using any force at all, and the other wasn’t even in pain.

Did kids these days all get so immersed when playing games?

Noticing the odd look from the one-eyed ANBU, Naruto scratched the back of her head, laughing foolishly.

“Hehe... Don’t look at me like that. If I didn't pretend to suffer seriously, Hoshino would actually start choking me for real, you know? How should I put it… Ah, right! You could call this the ‘gentleness a woman should show to a frustrated man.’”

What kind of gentleness is that supposed to be? Stop making excuses, you little drama queen.

Utterly speechless toward this idiotic Naruto, the one-eyed ANBU had no intention of staying here any longer.

Unfortunately, before he could vanish using the Body Flicker Technique, Naruto grabbed onto the hem of his pants.

“Don’t leave so soon! If you leave just like this, Hoshino’s definitely going to beat me up once he wakes up!”

“Then just hit him back.”

“No way! I'm a gentle girl who intends to use love to change the world—how could I possibly fight violence with violence?”

“...Are you sure it's not just because you can't beat him?”

“Aw-awww, ANBU-san, what are you saying… how could I possibly lose to Hoshino? I just... just really hate violence. Ahaha... Ahahaha...”

Seeing Naruto’s awkward sideways glance and stammering, the one-eyed ANBU instantly confirmed it—this brat really was exactly like her mother.

Well, since I’m here already, it doesn’t hurt to stay a bit longer.

Thinking that, the one-eyed ANBU picked up Hoshino again and carried him back inside this shabby rented room.

When Hoshino regained consciousness, he spotted the one-eyed ANBU, learned the details from Naruto, then immediately leaned back, put both feet arrogantly on the small round table, tilted his neck, and sneered with an extremely gangster-like tone:

“You’re the blind ANBU bastard who knocked me out? How does someone like you even get to join ANBU, huh? Let me guess—you got special permission because you lost an eye? Ahh, seriously, what’s wrong with this village, letting a disabled guy like you into ANBU out of pity?”

This arrogant brat, give him an inch and he takes a mile!

Aware that his earlier actions were a mistake, the one-eyed ANBU forced himself to speak calmly:

“I got into ANBU purely on my own merits... Also, my left eye isn’t blind.”

“Huh...? Not blind just because you say so? Listen carefully—I happen to have great relationships with both the Uchiha and Hyūga clan heads, and even the Third Hokage is pretty good to me. Someone like you, relying on sympathy for your blindness to worm your way into ANBU—I can easily have you fired!”

Who’s this spoiled brat trying to fool!?

Infuriated by Hoshino’s fake idiot act, the one-eyed ANBU now knew for certain—those brain-dead thugs from stories actually existed in reality.

“Forget it. Consider this as compensation for knocking you out earlier. Letting you see my left eye isn’t a big deal. Actually, this left eye of mine... is a Sharingan!”

Under the animal mask of the ANBU, the scarred left eye which had been closed suddenly opened wide.

It couldn’t be mistaken—a red eye with three spinning tomo—huh?

Hoshino, who had been intentionally acting brainless to annoy the ANBU, stared suspiciously at the one-eyed ANBU’s left eye.

Strange... Why aren’t the three tomo in Kakashi’s Sharingan spinning?

Yes—this one-eyed ANBU was definitely Kakashi.

That unmistakable hairstyle, hair color, and the scarred left eye—recognizing him incorrectly would’ve been harder.

But right now, the fact that this ANBU was Kakashi wasn’t important.

What truly mattered was that Hoshino felt a powerful sense of wrongness from Kakashi’s Sharingan.

Before Hoshino figured out exactly what was off, a stream of tears suddenly trickled from beneath Kakashi’s mask, down from that red eye.

What was going on? Was Kakashi, seeing Naruto with both his original right eye and Obito’s left one, overcome by emotions for his departed teacher and Kushina? Was he crying because of that?

“I never thought you were actually such a deeply emotional person... And here I thought you were—”

Before Hoshino finished speaking, Kakashi quickly interrupted him.

“Hold on—save the talk for later. I'm not in the mood to chat right now. This colored cont—uh, I mean, this Sharingan really hurts my eye. Let me handle this first.”

Kakashi turned away, reaching under his mask.

He just said ‘colored contact lens’ didn’t he? I didn’t mishear that, did I?

Did that mean that Konoha’s number one technician, the famous Copy Ninja Kakashi, his legendary Sharingan was actually…

A colored contact lens!!?

No, no, stop joking. Seriously, at this rate, I really might start hoping for this world’s destruction…

Unable to accept reality, Hoshino shakily patted Kakashi’s back.

“Hatake Go-Go—... Mister One-Eyed ANBU, your Sharingan... is real, right? It's not—not a colored contact lens, right?”

“Kid, don’t touch me right now. Sit quietly aside—I’m adjusting the posit—ah, I mean, my Sharingan! Adjusting a contact lens requires very careful handling. If you disturb me now, an accident could easily happen.”

“…”

Expressionless, Hoshino walked over and opened the shabby wooden door of his doghouse.

He adjusted his stance, raised his foot, and fiercely kicked Kakashi, who was sitting on the floor fiddling with his colored contact lens, straight outside.

“I absolutely refuse to accept it! Never will I acknowledge that someone wearing a colored contact and pretending to have a Sharingan could be the Hatake Go-Go I know!! GET OUT—!! A fake like you—don’t ever appear within my sight again!!!”

After kicking a certain terminally idiotic faker out the door, Hoshino immediately slammed it shut.

“AAAAAHHH—!! MY EYE! MY FINGER ALMOST STABBED INTO MY OWN EYE!!”

Ignoring the screams of the fake Kakashi outside, Hoshino had barely sat down before Naruto asked with a look of surprise:

“Hoshino, how did you know that ANBU’s name?”

“What nonsense are you spouting now? ANBU aren’t allowed to reveal their names to outsiders, okay? How could I possibly know his name? Ridiculous.”

“You’re lying again~ When he was interrogating me, seeing that I wouldn’t answer, he said something like ‘Anyway, it’s just Naruto, it’s not a big deal,’ and then he told me his name himself! It was Hatake Ka... Hatake Ka-something. Anyway, the surname was exactly what you just said—and you still insist you don’t know the one-eyed ANBU’s name?”

“Pffft—!”

Hoshino, trying to calm himself with a mouthful of water, sprayed everything onto Naruto’s face.

Boom!

His shabby wooden door burst open, and standing there was someone covering his left eye with his left hand while lightning crackled chaotically in his right.

...Ah, it was the Raikiri.

Confronted with undeniable proof, no matter how Hoshino tried to avoid it, he couldn’t escape the truth—this guy really was Kakashi.

“Wh-why... Why do you people keep—keep surprising me one after another!? It’s not like I’m being picky—but, but can’t you at least let me properly despair at this damned, trashy world!? Follow the damned script for me already!!!”

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T/N: KAKASHI HAS A FAKE EYEEEEEEEEEEE?????????????

This is a fan translation of 火影之软饭真好吃 by 肾亏能力者 All rights to the original work belong to the creator. Please support them by exploring their original work or sharing it with others if you can. Thank you for reading and supporting my efforts to bring this story to a wider audience!