Naruto: Freeloading is Great! [14]

In that suffocatingly awkward air, the three of them wordlessly headed together to the temple fair.

As long as they got to a bustling, crowded place like that, surely it would break the delicate tension.

That’s what they thought.

Though Hoshino and Naruto were already five years old, this was the first time they had ever come. For years they’d been broke to the point of “jingling poverty.” Without money, there really wasn’t any fun to be had—couldn’t buy anything anyway, so what was the point of coming?

Of course, Naruto’s thoughts were completely different from lazy Hoshino’s. She was just afraid that if she came alone, she’d be driven out or pelted with pebbles. But now things were different—she had a big-shot, awesome powerhouse at her side.

The Uchiha clan’s second son. Even in a crowded place like this, people instinctively gave way to him.

Mock Naruto with jeers? Toss pebbles at him while he walked beside Sasuke?

Whoever dared… heh, wouldn’t last long before the Konoha Police Force “invited” them in under trumped-up charges. One-day trip through the hells—guaranteed “pleasant” experience.

Naruto might not have felt much, but Hoshino, staring at Sasuke—this Sasuke who had wealth, power, looks, talent, lineage, and a whole basket of “protagonist traits”—

What the hell, man. This guy’s life is maxed out cheat-codes. Who’s supposed to be the isekai protagonist here anyway!?

Noticing Hoshino’s glaringly jealous eyes, Sasuke’s face instantly clouded. She stole a glance at Naruto, laughing away like an idiot.

Naruto doesn’t seem to hate me as much as I feared. But Hoshino… ugh, has his hate already twisted into “love turned to hate”? Should I… tell him the truth?

No, no, no. For my brother’s sake—that’s impossible! What should I do, what should I do—!?

While Sasuke was locked in an inner death-struggle, Hoshino was already done. He couldn’t stand standing next to this “winner of life,” taking ten thousand points of psychic damage just by proximity.

Only a ghost would keep hanging around to prove how trash they are compared to Sasuke’s perfection!

Besides, right now he was just being the third wheel to the “true love” of SasuNaru. He hadn’t forgotten what he said yesterday—his real mission was to deliver the perfect assist for that brat Naruto.

“You two go ahead. I just noticed a friend of mine is here. I’ll go say hi.”

But the moment he tried to walk off, Sasuke and Naruto each grabbed one of his arms.

“D-don’t go… The truth is, I… I-I-I… I don’t hate being with you.”

“Don’t go! Didn’t we agree yesterday to do our best? How can you just leave like that! Besides, I know for a fact, Hoshino, you don’t have any friends besides me. That ‘friend’ thing just now was a lie!”

Sasuke not wanting to be alone with Gaylord Naruto? Totally understandable. Few men in this world would want to be stuck alone with someone eyeing their body. But Naruto…

What the hell are you doing!? Refuse the assist if you want, fine—but don’t go spilling my black history out loud! What kind of crap is this!!

Sure, Hoshino wanted to explain that the reason he had no friends was just because he couldn’t be bothered with childish brats and their “pretend house” games. But clearly, now wasn’t the time.

“Alright, fine. I was lying just now. Actually… uh… yeah… actually my stomach hurts. That’s it, just a solo stomachache. Aah~ Since saying I need to squat on the toilet is a little embarrassing, I made up an excuse instead. But really—I’m about to burst, so you two go on ahead, I’ll catch up after I finish.”

Having made up this excuse, Hoshino expected them to just let him go. Instead—

“I can wait!”

“Me too!”

“…That’s not necessary, is it? I’m going to be squatting for a while…”

“No problem—!!!” ×2

Realizing he couldn’t convince these two stubborn faces, Hoshino sighed and trudged toward the public toilets.

What the hell are you thinking, Naruto? If you don’t spend time alone with Sasuke, how are you supposed to max out his affection points? Idiot~!

But as the saying goes: Heaven never seals off all exits. Just when Hoshino thought his perfect assist was doomed because the two were tailing him so closely, an opening appeared.

“Eh? You’re not going to follow me inside and keep watch?”

At his question, Sasuke glanced aside awkwardly and said:

“I-I don’t have… the urge to relieve myself right now… Besides, with my current identity…”

Suspicious as it was, Hoshino chalked it up to: “Oh, noble aristocrats don’t want to use the same filthy facilities as commoners.” Damn it, this niubi brat was even more enviable by the minute.

“And you?”

“Why would I go in? The air in there is awful. Watching from the door is enough.”

Though Hoshino was exasperated by Naruto’s ridiculously blunt “I just want to monitor you” answer, he didn’t bother arguing. He turned and went into the men’s toilet.

…

Fifteen minutes later, Sasuke and Naruto were still standing nearby, eyes locked on the exit.

No matter what, Sasuke wanted to repair her bond with Hoshino today. Even if they couldn’t go back to how they were, at least—please don’t let him hate her so much…

As for Naruto, her goal was nearly the same as Hoshino’s—delivering the perfect assist for his romance. So how could she let him slip away!?

Then, they saw a tall man exit the restroom. He’d looked normal going in, but came out bent over, clutching his stomach like he was in pain.

Sasuke frowned. Naruto noticed.

“Sasuke? What’s wrong?”

“That man’s behavior looked strange… I think I need to check inside the men’s toilet to confirm something…”

“Eh…!?”

“D-don’t get the wrong idea! I’m not going in there to peek—I just want to make sure Hoshino didn’t slip away disguised as that man!”

“Oh, so that’s all? For a second I thought you were like me, curious about the structure of the men’s toilets and wanting to take a look inside.”

Naruto’s words left Sasuke speechless.

What the hell, Naruto! You’re actually that kind of person!? Where’s your feminine modesty? Did you throw it away somewhere!?

Even though Sasuke had long since gotten used to being mistaken for male because of her disguise, she’d never once stepped into a men’s restroom. The idea terrified her. So…

“Na-Naruto, even though your reason is… shameful… let’s go in together. T-t-together. What do you think?”

“Really? That’s great—! I was actually scared Hoshino would catch me and beat me to death. But if I’m with you, Sasuke… then he definitely won’t go all out! Hee~”

“Because of me—!!?”

Naruto’s words pushed Sasuke straight into despair. So Hoshino really hates me so much, I’ve been downgraded to “punching bag stand-in” status? No, no, no—that means our bond is completely unsalvageable!

“What are you so shocked about, Sasuke? Didn’t you already know Hoshino liked you yesterday?”

“Eh? Naruto, what strange thing are you saying?”

“Sasuke, you’re the one saying strange things!”

In that instant, both kids froze, eyes blank.

And finally—their wavelengths connected.

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T/N: btw dont complain about the changing pronouns, its because hoshino is a dumb fuck! hehe

This is a fan translation of 火影之软饭真好吃 by 肾亏能力者 All rights to the original work belong to the creator. Please support them by exploring their original work or sharing it with others if you can. Thank you for reading and supporting my efforts to bring this story to a wider audience!